Amelia
The car rolled along the familiar roads, the passing scenery a blur as my eyes fixated on the landscape, seeking solace in the comforting familiarity. Home was near, yet an emotional distance seemed to stretch between me and Karl. The weight of silence enveloped the space inside the car, a heavy atmosphere that had settled since Karl's confession growing thicker with every passing moment. It had cast a new light on our relationship.
We both were dancing around each other, hiding gazes, trying to act as if nothing had happened. The flight had been an awkward zone too. I had spent all my time looking out the window while he had just stared at the screen.
I think I've fallen for you The words echoed in my mind with his face imprinted in my mind of how he was looking at me as if it had happened a few minutes back. I dared to sneak a glance at him. He was looking out of the window just like I was. For a second he stole my breath away. He looked dashing even with his rumpled hair. Every time his hand reached to move into his hair, I would look at him. It was a habit of his when he was nervous.
As I stared at him more and more, all I could think was how someone like him could like me. The inferiority complex had gotten inside of me not deciding to leave now even when I had achieved so much in life. It wasn't always there but ever since Daniel it had developed with a progressing speed. He had made me feel like that, his family had made me feel like that. All those cruel words had taught me a lesson that I could never forget.
"What makes you think that we have ever accepted you?" Her words didn't make any sense. What was she trying to say?
"You were the best-kept secret," Josephine smiled with pure malice. All these months we had lived together I had never seen this side of her.
"Secret," I tried to make sense but all I got was nothing. "How come?" I asked with confusion enveloping me.
"Oh my dear, no one knows about you," she walked across the hall to the bar with my eyes fixed on her. I had been the one to serve her drinks, even after my marriage with Daniel I had always made them for her. She had sat there while I had always been standing. Suddenly the realization dawned on me that she had never considered me to be her equal. She had never considered me good enough to sit with her.
"How many people know that you are Daniel's wife?" Her question had me stare at her blankly.
"Count that for me, my dear," she persisted. "I bet you can count them with your ten fingers. I hope you know how to do that," her words felt like stab wounds in my self-esteem. I knew I didn't have a college degree. My grades weren't good. I had barely been able to make it to graduation but I didn't deserve such a degradation.
"I might not be that educated but I know the basics. If you had such low thoughts about me and my upbringing you should told me so," my lips trembled. "I wouldn't have become a part of this family," she laughed at my words.
"Family?" she teased. "Oh my dear, you were never a part of this family."
"You were so gullible and willing to do anything that I had to use you," she drawled as she took out something from one of the drawers.
"The only image we had taken of your marriage," I saw the picture in her hand. "Can you count the people in it," she crossed the expanse of the room to reach to me with one of her hands nursing her glass of whiskey.
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, and ten including you my dear. Court marriages are the best. I already knew that I would be throwing you out after Daniel's eyes opened up. So I had urged upon a court marriage with a handful of people to know about it. What a pity that no one besides these people will believe in your marriage, and five of them already hate you," she chuckled as tears welled in my eyes. I was hurting even though I didn't have the whole picture of what she was trying to say.
Josephine's revelation hit me like a tidal wave, sweeping away the illusions of love and belonging that I had built over the months. The warmth of our shared moments turned cold, replaced by the harsh reality that I had been nothing more than a pawn for her.
As I stared at the photograph she held, the faces of those present at my court marriage seemed like distant memories. The moment I had cherished had been tainted by Josephine's cunning manipulation. The realization that she had orchestrated my isolation from the family, that I was never truly accepted, stabbed at my heart.
"Why?" The word escaped my lips, a mix of confusion and pain. I needed to understand why she had gone to such lengths to deceive me.
Josephine, still sipping her whiskey, looked at me with a sinister smile.
"Do you think anyone with a good family name and reputation would marry someone like you? They won't even think about a lowly servant like you. All you could do is beg for their mercy upon you," her smile and mocking words just ripped my wounds open.
"You were a means to an end, my dear. Daniel was blinded by your charm, and I knew once his eyes were opened, you would be cast aside like a worn-out accessory." My heart ached from the harsh reality that Josephine was revealing. The revelation struck deep, exposing a painful truth I had been oblivious to all this time.
The weight of her words bore down on me, and I struggled to maintain composure. "But why me? What did I ever do to you?"
Her laughter echoed in the room. "It's not about you, dear. I needed you as a tool and you were the perfect one. A simple, uneducated girl who could be discarded when no longer needed."
I felt a mix of anger and betrayal, the tears in my eyes threatening to spill over. How could she do something like this? I was bleedign on the inside. "I loved Daniel. I thought we were building a life together."
Josephine's expression turned mocking. "Love? Oh, my dear, love is a luxury in our world. It's about alliances and appearances. You were naive to think otherwise."
The room felt suffocating as the truth settled in. I had been a mere pawn in Josephine's game of deception, a pawn that had outlived its usefulness. The pain of not being accepted, of being used and discarded, was a bitter pill to swallow. I burned in the agony of betrayal yet I was in denial.
The foundation of trust had crumbled, leaving me to confront the harsh reality of a life built on lies
"Someone uneducated. You know a poor little servant never had a place in my son's life or anyone's life in my family. You are just a good lay at best. A pretty little face to fuck and throw away. If you really need the money try a brothel next time," her finger caressed my cheek before she had splashed her whiskey on my face.
The room seemed to spin as Josephine's words cut through me like a knife. The emotional turmoil inside me surged, a mix of disbelief, anger, and heartbreak. I had been a pawn in her cruel game, manipulated and discarded without a second thought.
As the whiskey dripped down my face, I felt the burning sting, both physically and emotionally. I wiped the liquid from my face, my hands trembling with agony I suffered in.
"Go on and wash before walking out of this house to never come back in here ever again," She smashed the glass right beside my legs making me jump before storming off. I could still hear her telling the servants to throw me and my things out. Nineteen-year-old me had no idea back then what was happening. All I thought back then was that she was just being bitter about what had gone wrong.
I hadn't believed her words in the moment but my insecurities had grown enormously since then. The seeds were implanted to grow and grow.
The ringing of the phone drew me out of the old memories. I looked into my purse to see who was calling only to realise that it was Edwin's phone, our driver. Keeping my bag aside I just breathed in taking in my surroundings. We still were a little far away from home. Another twenty minutes and we would be home. My eyes stole another glance at Karl. He was still looking outside. I wondered waht was going inside his mind, what did he thought as we passed by.
My eyes turned to look out his window, only to meet his eyes in the refelction of the glass.
Our eyes meeting in the refelction. He wasn't looking at the scenery outside. The trees and sky outside didn't capture his mind. It wasn't that what had him entranced. His eyes were on me. It was my reflection that had him mesmerized. My heart rammed against my chest. In the moment it was just us glancing at each other.
With every ticking second air seemed to thicken as our gazes locked in the reflection of the window. Time slowed down, and for a moment, it felt like the world outside ceased to exist. His eyes held a depth that I hadn't noticed before, a mixture of vulnerability and something unspoken.
I could feel the intensity of the connection between us, as if an invisible thread had woven itself between our souls. It was a moment suspended in time, and the unspoken words hung in the air like a delicate dance waiting to unfold.
His lips curved into a faint smile, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken words between us. The scenery outside the window suddenly became a mere backdrop to the silent exchange happening in that reflective surface.
In that shared moment, it felt like the boundaries between us blurred, and the outside world faded away. It was just him and me, lost in the language of our eyes, communicating in a way that words could never capture.
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