𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄, xolo...

By -achillesheeI

15.9K 714 412

extended summary inside! in which maeve tanner and xolo maridueña are proof that hate and love are not so di... More

o. the last one
one. am i bovvered
two. if i was that pretty i'd be kind of mean too
three. that's not very feminist of you
four. caffeine and spite
five. a digital footprint rivalled by only that of medusa
six. if you ruin my kissing career
seven. i can take constructive criticism
eight. this is courtney henggeler's show
nine. i can't believe you masterminded me
ten. you could sell your arm for a good few thousand now
eleven. now's the time to add her on pokémon go
twelve. strong platonic feelings
thirteen. let me know when to expect to be shanked for being team jacob
fourteen. short and emotionally inarticulate
fifteen. the permanent evidence of your own stupidity
sixteen. invisible strings my dear
seventeen. i am an absolute fucking fool
eighteen. at least you're self aware
nineteen. he's heartbroken over the betrayal of jake gyllenhaal
twenty. i think ones stabbing me in the ass right now
twenty one. get in the bed and see what happens
twenty two. i wanted my career just to be nepo brother
twenty three. will i get to witness ralph macchio playing beerio kart
twenty four. this is a hoes before bros world
twenty five. maybe distance would make the heart fonder
twenty six. don't back to december me
twenty eight. latino boys anonymous
twenty nine. if this pub quiz ends my relationship
thirty. you are the hottest evil genius ever

twenty seven. what do i know of oregon

451 21 11
By -achillesheeI

STRAWBERRY WINE ENTHUSIASTS🥂
seven participants

COOPER #2
i want to do a pub quiz

COOPER #1
you are of your own autonomy

COOPER #2
i meant as a group asshole

JSTB
what are we
british

SHOELACE
i think it sounds like fun

PONYBOY CURTIS
i don't
my general knowledge is ass

COOPER #1
that's a strangely specific subject but
hey whatever floats your boat

PONYBOY CURTIS
shut up caspian

THE INTERNET
i LOVE pub quizzes my knowledge
on everything ever is absolutely
supreme

SHOELACE
i admire your confidence however
i'm unconvinced

PONYBOY CURTIS
she is weirdly good at quizzes

THE INTERNET
the only issue is i would not choose
any of you to be on my team

THE INTERNET'S BOYFRIEND
not even me?

THE INTERNET
especially not you
you messaged me to ask if oregon
was on the east or west coast the
other day

THE INTERNET'S BOYFRIEND
okay and
what do i know of oregon

COOPER #1
nothing clearly

COOPER #2
so
pub quiz time?

PONYBOY CURTIS
we'll have to wait until maeve's
birthday

JSTB
damn it maeve why do you have to
be a child

THE INTERNET
i am not a child i am twenty

THE INTERNET'S BOYFRIEND
she is not a child she is twenty

SHOELACE
be sure to emphasise that it's legal
and professional to a court of law

COOPER #2
if we can't have a pub quiz night
yet can we atleast sit at home and
drink wine

JSTB
BORING

COOPER #1
i have a new drinking game we
can play

JSTB
less boring i'm in

SHOELACE
tonight?

COOPER #1
sure thing
come round whenever

THE INTERNET
i'm on my way

THE INTERNET'S BOYFRIEND

beat you

THE INTERNET
xolito pretty please come pick me
up and take me to caspian's

THE INTERNET'S BOYFRIEND
fine

PONYBOY CURTIS
absolutely whipped i'm telling you

☆☆☆

XOLO_MARIDUENA POSTED TO THEIR STORY!
21 minutes ago


MAEVETANNER REPLIED TO YOUR STORY!

xolito i don't care if this is for the game its on sight

TAIYOCURTIS POSTED TO THEIR STORY!
17 minutes ago

MAEVETANNER REPLIED TO YOUR STORY!

i did NOT sign up for this to be attack maeve night :(

☆☆☆

"i'm actually fighting the next person to pull a brick that has anything to do with insulting or slandering me," maeve scowled as caspian laighed, taking a sip of his drink.

"the game is not targeting you, maverick. it's just your own bad luck working against you." maeve stuck her tongue out at him.

the game caspian had bought was jenga, but with a twist. each brick had an instruction on the block that you either had to follow or drink, or both. so far, jacob had been forced to do so many starjumps he thought he might have been sick, xolo had to do an impression of someone publicly, and taiyo had to post a terrible photo of the person to his right.

now it was maeve's turn, and with careful fingers, she extracted a block from the middle of the tower.

"down your drink. you have to be kidding me." maeve knocked her glass of strawberry wine down in one before rolling her eyes. "apparently the universe is out to get me."

"well, that was pretty impressive," xolo shrugged, topping up the glass. "and pretty hot."

"okay, my turn!" caspian interrupted as jacob elbowed xolo playfully. he took a block from the tower, turning it over. it simply read jacob.

         "what does that even mean?" jacob whined as caspian laughed.

         "it means you finish your drink."

          "does everyone else have a brick?"

          "no, where's the fun in that?"

the game continued for a long while, and by the time xolo knocked over the tower, the wine had settled as a steady hum in maeve's ears. he moved himself to sit at her feet, squeezing her hand gently as she smiled down at him, and taiyo cocked an eyebrow.

she knew what he was thinking. how insane it was to have this new and wonderful group of friends, all because of a chemistry reading nine months ago that maeve had come out of full of hatred.

she'd accepted long ago that she had pre-judged xolo, but she had never expected this. part of the reason it was easier to pre-judge people was because it made the time maeve spent with them more bearable. there was nothing worse for her than working on set for months if not years with people she would forget as soon as she moved on.

          "what you thinking about?" xolo placed a hand on her knee gently.

          "you," maeve answered honestly. "you're pretty okay, you know that?"

          "'pretty okay' might be the highest regard you've ever given me."

          "that's not true and you know it."

xolo rolled his eyes, kissing her hand gently and ignoring the way jacob and haven started bustling over something on the other side of the room.

          "uh, hate to interrupt," lacy said with a playful grin, catching their attention. "but where are taiyo and caspian?"

        "what?" maeve's eyebrows shot up. "did they go upstairs?"

          "maybe we should leave them," xolo shrugged. "imagine how bad it would have been if someone came upstairs the first time we had drinks round at mine and jacob's?"

          "god, i wish you hadn't given me either of those mental images." lacy put her hand to her head, wincing mockingly. "does that mean it's home time?"

          "maybe in a little," maeve shrugged, clocking on to the speaker haven and jacob had been fighting to connect to. "we should dance first, though."

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