A short chapter after a long break. I love writing and reading slow-going stories.
Our Chapter song is in media section. Love you ❣️
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
*How can I make people believe that I love you like breathing?*
-TMYstories
15/01/2019 from Yoongi's narration
With what Jimin said, I had butterflies in my stomach and felt uneasy in front of my father. Aside from my mother and brother supporting me in the decisions I've made so far, I never dared to talk to my father. I had a classic father-son relationship with my father since my childhood, and I was never a child who could be friends with his fathers like my other peers. For this reason, my mother's understanding and love for me had been enough for me until this age, but now hiding that I was in love with Jimin felt like a pain, and most of all, I wanted my father to support and accept me.
That's why, to clear up the situation, I first tapped Jimin on the head.
"Oh, you punk, don't talk nonsense."
When Jimin and I came face to face, he understood what I wanted to do from my eyes and continued my game. When he suddenly jumped towards me and started a fake fight with me, I knew that this was the best step to get out of this environment. With an agile move, I squeezed him under my right arm, paying attention to my left shoulder, and he was trying with all his strength to knock me down by my waist and try to free himself from my arms.
My father rolling his eyes and sitting back in his seat made me take a deep breath. Maybe we were making things more complicated, but at that moment, with Jimin by my side, I wanted to avoid the words we wouldn't want to hear as much as possible. I was happy to have saved that day, without knowing that these escapes would cause me so much remorse that I would lose sleep at night.
While even we couldnt say anything clearly about how our relationship was progressing, we were facing our hardest test in the beautiful early days of a relationship. Everything was difficult and thorny from the beginning. If Jimin's family thought I was seducing Jimin and tried to keep me away from him, I could agree with them. So, I spent two years thinking about all this. Ultimately, I thought we should just spend time being happy if we had a chance, but reality and all the possibilities floating around in the rooms of my mind didnt match. Everything I hadn't considered was hitting me in the face one by one, and I was taking all the blame, knowing that I never deserved Jimin and his love, or that I was the one who dragged his life down this thorny path.
Because loving him was like breathing and I was breathing for years. No one would focus on people's constant breathing. I loved him so secretly and openly.
I wanted to collect my thoughts and stay calm. For this reason, I was busy with my physical therapy and the remaining work on my new home as much as possible.
While I was looking at the new medication sheet prescribed for me by Ms. Choi, who had prepared a strict therapy program for my shoulder to heal, I was nodding my head at what she said.
''Emotional stress also affects your muscles and makes therapy difficult. Try to stay away from stress." My eyes remained fixed on her hand as she patted my arm.
At that moment, Jimin came into my view, and I gathered myself together and after bowing to Ms. Choi, I took quick steps towards Jimin. He came to pick me up, as he does after every therapy.
He made eye contact with Ms. Choi and nodded to her. He put his hand on my shoulder and directed me, and we walked to the car in silence.
He's been thoughtful like me lately. I knew Jimin so well that I could even read his mind from his movements. My stressful situation was also affecting him, and it was impossible not to see it. Since we had not yet told the group about our relationship, we felt as if the short sweet moments between the two of us were not satisfying us. We both knew that everything we felt missing was what we feared most.
''The therapy with Ms. Choi seems to be going well.''
I watched the road for a while and thought about what I should say. Ms. Choi was the number one physiotherapist recommended by all orthopedic doctors at the hospital where Namjoon worked.
''Yes. She told me a few exercises I should repeat at home, and I think I'll have to use the shoulder strap for a while longer."
He didn't answer. Jimin had already seen and learned everything that was most important and needed attention during the entire therapy process. He was helping me a lot and I was grateful to him.
''I prepared a few sketches of your house last night. Do you want me to show you on the laptop when we get home? We'll take note of the places you want to change."
I turned my body towards him as much as I could and waited for him to look at me when the car stopped at the red light. I made his eyes turn to me with a feather-light caress from his temple to his cheek.
''There's nothing I want to change.''
He couldn't hold back his smile and finally, those dark clouds and all the troubles in my mind covered him like a quilt and made me forget everything. His smile was like medicine.
"Hyung, you haven't even seen it yet."
I leaned my head back and watched his face. It was like a miracle. Even the butterflies in my stomach were in love with him.
"I forgot to tell you, but before arriving, Hoseok Hyung called and said that everyone would gather at his house. If you don't feel well, we may not go. ''
The question wasn't whether I felt well or not. The reason was that no one knew about our relationship except Namjoon and Taehyung.
''Are you going to be okay? Are you still insistent on not confessing to them? I said there was no need for this. ''
Jimin's flushed cheeks and biting his lips were enough for me to understand how stressed he felt, but not being able to free him from all these thoughts was stressing me out, too.
Talking about him being in love with someone made him shy. I was Jimin's best friend, his favorite person, and ultimately the person he fell in love with, and I believed that the end result of all these feelings was that he fell in love with me, which made him shy.
When he parked in front of Hoseok's house, I held his hand on the steering wheel.
''My butterfly...''
He closed his eyes and slumped his shoulders. I even loved the shaky breath he took, I loved the way he shyed away from my touch, lowered all his sails to the water, and calmed down. He was addicted to all the affectionate touches he received from me, and I was ready to give him everything he wanted, every touch and every warm kiss, if it weren't for the things that prevented us.
Hesitantly, he released his hold on my hand and folded his hands in his lap. The fact that he was like a timid bird that his emotions were the purest, and that his love was so untouched and precious made me lose my mind. It was a pure heart, but I was a selfish person who wanted to be the only owner of that heart, the only one who touched it, the only one who lived and kept it alive.
''It's okay, Hyung. Just.. They are my family too and that's why I want to do everything right. ''
I nodded and patted his arm.
''Let's continue as you wish. Just be happy and smile. ''
When we got to the others, Jungkook ran and hugged me. After the accident, I noticed that Jungkook was treating me more sensitively. He was secretly blaming himself for my accident with his motorcycle. He was doing things to make sure I was comfortable as long as he was with me. After patting Jungkook on the back, I looked at the others helping Hoseok and we exchanged greetings.
The beer cases on the table were proof that we would spend the night there that night.
Hoseok was feeding Jungkook the leftover bread from the sandwiches he made. When Namjoon and I locked eyes, we made an unspoken agreement. However, after taking a sip from his beer, his eyes broke away from me and found Jimin first. While this wasn't something that affected me before, now the way he looked after me at Jimin made me feel as if he had revealed all the unspoken secrets between us. I corrected my sitting and turned my attention to Jin Hyung.
''Yoongi-ah, is your shoulder healed enough to go fishing? ''
While everyone was laughing, I took a sip of my beer. Taehyung joked about Jin Hyung's fishing desire.
"Hyung, you know that Yoongi Hyung came with you just because you like fishing, right? ''
Our laughter increased as Jin Hyung's voice rose dramatically.
'What are you talking about? He also likes fishing. Tell them Yoongi. ''
Jimin was laughing when he prepared me a plate of sandwiches made by Hoseok and brought it to me.
"Okay, okay, don't exaggerate, Hyung is not healed yet. ''
Jin Hyung looked at me out of the corner of his eye and nudged me with his elbow. He knew that his whisper was just a whisper because everyone could hear him.
''Yaah Yoongi-ah? Can you at least do rock-paper-scissors? If you can do that, it means you are okay and healed. You should at least be able to do this. ''
While everyone was laughing, Jimin's blushing cheeks and quickly turning to the kitchen counter after looking away made me laugh.
''You have to ask Jimin. He went through the entire therapy process and helped me a lot. ''
When Jin Hyung's surprised voice filled the room, he wanted to give Jimin a thumbs up and say "you're amazing."
"Yaah Jimin-ah you are truly amazing. You are very thoughtful. You take good care of Yoongi. Well done. ''
Namjoon's eyes were moving between the two of us again and again, and I was trying hard not to throw the beer bottle in my hand at Namjoon. I raised my eyebrows, shook my head negatively so only he could see, and said no. I rolled my eyes as Namjoon looked at me incomprehensibly.
I was startled when I suddenly felt Jungkook's touch to gently massage my shoulders.
''Don't be afraid Hyung, I won't hurt you. ''
From that moment on, Jimin's eyes never left me. Jimin could be a very secretive character when he took ownership of things. He could even be a little cruel. I closed my eyes and leaned back as Jungkook's massage on my shoulder and neck relaxed me. Everyone was talking about their own things, and we were passing the minutes with the sound of clinking beer bottles, music and Hoseok's laughter. I felt embarrassed when Jungkook continued to massage at the same pace as if his hand was not tired at all and like someone who knew his job, but I couldn't say anything to make him stop.
Minutes later, when he applied a little too much pressure to a place close to my surgery site, I frowned because it hurt, but this wasn't a pain I couldn't bear, on the contrary, it would be very mild if I thought that it hurt more during physical therapy. Even though I didn't say a single word about hurting, I was surprised that Jimin took full control with a single word.
''Hey! Don't massage Hyung like that, you're hurting him. Get out. ''
With a single movement, Jungkook's massaging hands left my shoulders, and while his presence retreated a step or two, Jimin's hands found my shoulders. It was possible to understand from Jungkook's voice that he felt sad and wrong, but he went to Taehyung and Hoseok without thinking much about it.
I was startled when Jimin's warm hands entered my sweater and touched my bare skin. While Jungkook was massaging me through the surface of my sweater, Jimin was expanding his boundaries and reminding me of who he was. As if it were very possible to forget. This was Jimin's way of taking care of the people he loved. Unfortunately, it was not just for me, but since we now knew that we were in love with each other, this was an action that aroused me and my feelings. I muttered, making sure no one could hear.
''Do you mean "only I can touch you"? ''
His massaging hands were going deeper, reaching my back and climbing up my neck again. He brought his head close to my ear and whispered.
''I wish this were possible. ''
When his warm hands left my shoulders, I felt chills.
''I wash my hands and come back. ''
Everyone was watching the shooting contest between Hoseok and Taehyung, and I quickly got up, followed Jimin, and threw myself in before the toilet door closed completely. With his eyes widening in surprise and his lips shaped like that, I fasten him up between the wall and my body before he could even be surprised.
''Hyung!''
I smelled his hair and cheeks.
''Yes. Your Hyung! What are you going to do now, Jimin-ah?
I could tell from his held breath and flushed cheeks that he was shy. He was stubbornly avoiding my eyes, but he wasn't making the slightest effort to escape my grip. Even his existence under my hand was a miracle for me.
"Where is your courage from before, Jimin-ah? hmm?''
''Hyung, the others are inside. They can hear us. ''
I was following him with my head to catch his eyes that were not looking at me, but I had my endurance limit and if I didn't steal a delicious kiss from Jimin, who was standing in front of me with his cheeks red and his beautiful eyes like blueberries, I could sit down and cry like a child. When my lips hungrily captured his lips, I was intoxicated with his taste.
He pressed himself tightly against the wall and leaned his head. My hand was holding his neck and head, and my fingers were stuck in his fragrant hair. With the body I held hostage between my body and the wall as if there was no tomorrow, and the taste of his lips melting like sugar in my mouth, I realized that this love would burn me to ashes.
When we parted our lips with a sweet kissing sound and brought our foreheads together, we were both breathing as if we had run a marathon. But Jimin's shyness suppressed everything so much that he freed himself from my arms and ran out of the toilet and joined the others, so I cooled my face and neck with cold water. I never wanted his taste on my lips to end.
When I walked in with the others, I found Jimin joking around on Jungkook's back, and it was a very Jimin move. Jungkook was carrying Jimin on his back and holding on for dear life to keep him from falling. Jimin was camouflaging his shyness by doing other things. When Jimin's eyes found me, he buried his head in Jungkook's neck and continued joking. Namjoon and I made eye contact and he raised an eyebrow at me.
''Fuck you Namjoon.''
''Fuck you too.''
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Vote
⭐