Tw! This character is messed up (like me) so she has anorexia. A eating disorder. Stay safe everyone! ❤️
I woke up at midnight another bad dream. I went to get up and my vision went blurry. Shit. I have not eaten this week. I can't. I won't. I close and open my eyes until it goes away then go to the kitchen for water. As I grab a cup I don't notice the foot steeps walking down the stairs so I just continue filling my cup up by the fridge. While I'm down here I might as well take my meds, I go to the cabinet it put them in earlier and took some. That's when I turned around and noticed Johnnie sitting in a chair at the table startling me. "HOLY- Oh hey Johnnie!" I say awkwardly. "Hey you alright?" no? "Yeah ofc why wouldn't I be?" I ask trying to make it a joke. He just shrugged u turned to the stairs and my vision went completely blurry again. Shit. Not here. Not him! Don't no- Great. I slowly wake up realizing I'm not in my room. "Where?-" Johnnie's room? I look to my side and don't see him there then I look around and surely enough he's passed out on the floor. I feel so bad. Not only did he have to carry me up here he also felt the need to sleep on the floor instead. Should I wake him up? Should I leave? It's still dark out....and his beds so comfortable...maybe I'll rest my eyes for a few minutes. I opened my eyes and expected it to be dark but it was light and Johnnie was gone. I slowly rise from his bed adjusting to the light. Shit. I need to eat something. Only a bite. I walked out of Johnnie's room to find Jake watching tv and Johnnie cooking eggs. Jake heard me come into the kitchen and sprung from the couch asking me a million questions of why I passed out last night so I had to think of a lie. "I was just dehydrated" I tried to play it off and then I remembered I was drinking water by Johnnie when it happened so if Johnnie doesn't remember that or bring up the lie then I should be good. There was silence then Jake got me a glass of water and Johnnie just looked sad. He knew. But then he smiled? He came over to me with a plate of eggs. Shit shit shit shit. It'll be fine. Just uhm. We don't have a dog anymore god damnit. I saw him watching me and I took a miniature bite. He smiled and gave me a small thumbs up. I'm not gonna lie it tasted pretty good. Jake was first to speak. "Hey, Tara and Sam Colby, really all of our friends are coming tonight for a party, it'll be a pool party mostly but there will be food inside." I smiled. I just bought a new swimsuit and it'll look good for tonight. I said ok then thanked Johnnie for the food, I had only eaten half the egg and I went to throw it away as Jake walked up the stairs but Johnnie grabbed my arm and stopped me. "At least a full egg? Please?" God damnit Johnnie! Why did he have to look at me like that! I took a deep inhale and ate the last two bites and threw the plate away. That's when it hit me. I ran to the bathroom and shut the door not noticing Johnnie running after me. I started to puke and Johnnie held back my hair and rub circles on my back. "I'm sorry..." Johnnie said. It hurt hearing him feel like this was his fault. I finished throwing up what I had eaten and brushed my teeth. Johnnie held his arms open. I gave him a hug. I didn't want to let go. He was so warm and comfortable. I could hear his heartbeat and I was so close to putting my head in his neck. No. That's a couples thing he's just trying to be nice. I let go of the hug and told him to get ready for the party since it was already 3 and they get here at 5-12. He listened and rushed up the stairs, I went to my room and remembered I put all my shirts in the laundry cause they were dirty. Well that's great. I don't wanna just wear a swimsuit top the whole time. I sighed and put on the swimsuit.
(What I imagine you can change it if ya want all of you are beautiful!)
I put on some black baggy pants to match and knocked on Johnnie's door. "Give me a minute." He replied. He opened the door with no shirt and black and gray swimsuit shorts. Keep it together. No blushing. Come. On. Y/n! "Uhm. I don't have any clean tops and I don't really feel like borrowing one with pizza stains on it from Jake, may I borrow one of yours?" I talked fast and he let out a laugh. "Sure, go pick one." He's letting me into his closet? I didn't complain and went into his closet finding a skull button up that went to my knees and I slipped it on and smiled. He's stylish and comfortable. I like it. I walked out and said thanks. I could have sworn his face was a bit red. I won't worry about it.