Reid POV:
Ever since my fight with Ronan driving home was filled with nothing but stress. I hated walking into the quiet tension filled house. I hated not knowing exactly what to expect.
I had to be the bigger person at some point. This wouldn't change if neither of us was willing to talk to the other. And it was starting to look like I had to be that person.
But I didn't need to do that today because Ronan had his weekly therapy appointment so I'd have the house to myself.
I was so ready for a quiet house without the awkward tension from Ronan. I needed this.
When I finally pulled into the driveway I noticed another car parked there. It wasn't a total surprise to see Tiffany's car at my house. She stopped over frequently to drop food off or just to check on me. With Ronan at his appointment it was more likely that she'd be over than on the days he was actually home.
Even though I had been looking forward to the empty house I was just as happy that I'd get to see Tiff. It was a change now that she wasn't living in the house but whenever she was over I got to pretend like nothing had really changed at all.
But as I walked into the house any of that relief was gone. I almost walked right into Tiffany as she was making her way out of the house. One look at her face I knew something was wrong. Her eyes were filled up with tears but still she forced a smile at the sight of me.
I was suddenly back two years ago as I got home from one of my evening classes and found Tiffany sat on the front steps crying. My world was being ripped apart yet again and I didn't know how to put any of the pieces back together.
"Are you okay?" I questioned not understanding fully what was happening.
"Yeah I'm fine." Her voice cracked slightly with emotion.
It was obvious to literally anyone that she was lying but I didn't say anything to try to argue with her. I watched as she tried to blink away the tears and force that emotion from her face. She didn't want me to know and I knew exactly who had caused it if she was trying to hide it from me.
"Are you leaving?" I didn't want her to go but she'd been practically running towards the door when I'd stepped in.
"I probably should." She nodded. "I made some banana bread, I left it for you on the kitchen counter."
"Thank you." I didn't know what else to say.
And neither did she because she gave me another one of those forced smiles and then walked out the front door.
Any of that relief or happiness I felt was gone. My world kept getting crushed by Ronan and I was getting really tired of it. I was tired of him ruining things and making the people I cared about leave.
I'd had to deal with people leaving all my life. It started with my mom and then my dad. At some point I'd had to stop counting and I'd been left with no one left.
I was tired and I was angry.
When I walked into the kitchen all those feelings amplified. My brother sat at the table his head in his hands, his whole body slouched into the table.
He'd done this, he'd done it again. I had wanted to apologize and make things right but he didn't change. I shouldn't have to keep apologizing and fixing things with him if he wouldn't at least try to put some effort in.
I felt my control start to break and there was nothing holding me back anymore.
"What the hell is your problem?" I unleashed myself on him.
Ronan looked up at me. His face reflected that same look that I'd seen in Tiffany's face but right now I was too angry to care.
"Walk away Reid, I can't do this with you right now." My brother said evenly.
That did nothing to ease the rage inside me. It was never the right time with him. He never wanted to talk about anything real. Anytime I'd ever tried he'd shut it down.
I knew it was a bad idea but I couldn't find it in myself to care. So instead of listening to him I just pushed harder.
"It's never the right time for you. All I want is for you to put in a bit of effort but apparently you don't even care enough to try to be a good brother."
His body tensed at my words.
"Is that what you think? That I don't care?" He asked.
"What am I supposed to think? You've done nothing to show me otherwise. After everything I've been through I thought I'd finally had a family, a stable place to come home to and you just threw a bomb on it like it was nothing. When everything fell apart I'd needed you and you weren't there, you haven't been there."
"You think I wanted this? You think that I wanted dad to go to jail? You think I wanted to drop out of college to become a parent? You think I want to be alone right now? I didn't want any of this but I did it all for you. I put dad behind bars for you, I became a parent at 19 for you, I lost the love of my fucking life for you. So don't try to tell me I don't fucking care about you." He snapped.
I felt like the floor opened up beneath me. I'd been gearing for a fight but Ronan had just landed the killing blow.
I put dad behind bars.
That was the only thing that was playing in my head. My dad going to jail had destroyed my whole life. I'd been put into foster care for almost a year before Ronan had been able to get custody of me. And now Ro was saying that he put me through that on purpose.
He'd done it apparently for me. He ruined my life and then claimed he'd done it for me.
The devastation was drowning me but that rage didn't let up.
"No. No you don't get to say that." I did everything I could to bring myself back down.
"I almost killed a man for putting their hands on your best friend, did you really think I wouldn't blow up my whole life for my own brother?"
"Don't try to blame me for that. You made those decisions, you blew up your life and ruined mine. You don't get to claim that it's my fault. You don't get to put that on me."
"You're right. I ruined your life. I did all of that because I wanted to, because I don't give a fuck about you. I'm the bad guy here." All the fight in him was gone and it hadn't been what I wanted to hear even as I pushed for him to say it.
I couldn't stay any longer. Instead of fixing things between us I'd blown it all up. I'd pushed for him to detonate that bomb.
As I walked away I let it all hit me. Everything he said, he'd sent our dad to prison. And apparently he was the one that had beat up my old coach for the abuse he had put Connor through.
I didn't know what to think but I knew I'd made a mistake. I'd pushed too hard and now I was left with the aftermath. I'd seen the look on Ronans face when I walked into that kitchen. He was like an injured animal and I'd backed him right into a corner. If I wanted to actually talk I should've stopped and shown him I wasn't a threat but instead I'd pushed and he had no other choice but to fight back.
And I didn't know if I was strong enough to hear all the things he had to say. I didn't know if I was ready to find out what was behind all those walls he had built up.
Because deep down I knew my brother and I knew he wasn't the bad guy here.
A/n:
Just because I want to give you all a gift today..... I'm introducing my next book, Anywhere with You!!! It's going to follow Cass, our loud, a little crazy, and lacking a filter main character as she falls in love with her complete opposite. The book is going to be a brothers best friend type of vibe and have some secret relationship fun. I'm super excited to be sharing this with you and you'll see more of Cass throughout this book! I hope you are excited just like I am!
My two girlies!!!! ❤️
Anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
-Cora Leigh