𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄, xolo...

By -achillesheeI

15.9K 714 412

extended summary inside! in which maeve tanner and xolo maridueña are proof that hate and love are not so di... More

o. the last one
one. am i bovvered
two. if i was that pretty i'd be kind of mean too
three. that's not very feminist of you
five. a digital footprint rivalled by only that of medusa
six. if you ruin my kissing career
seven. i can take constructive criticism
eight. this is courtney henggeler's show
nine. i can't believe you masterminded me
ten. you could sell your arm for a good few thousand now
eleven. now's the time to add her on pokémon go
twelve. strong platonic feelings
thirteen. let me know when to expect to be shanked for being team jacob
fourteen. short and emotionally inarticulate
fifteen. the permanent evidence of your own stupidity
sixteen. invisible strings my dear
seventeen. i am an absolute fucking fool
eighteen. at least you're self aware
nineteen. he's heartbroken over the betrayal of jake gyllenhaal
twenty. i think ones stabbing me in the ass right now
twenty one. get in the bed and see what happens
twenty two. i wanted my career just to be nepo brother
twenty three. will i get to witness ralph macchio playing beerio kart
twenty four. this is a hoes before bros world
twenty five. maybe distance would make the heart fonder
twenty six. don't back to december me
twenty seven. what do i know of oregon
twenty eight. latino boys anonymous
twenty nine. if this pub quiz ends my relationship
thirty. you are the hottest evil genius ever

four. caffeine and spite

565 29 11
By -achillesheeI

MAEVETANNER

LIKED BY TAIYOCURTIS AND OTHERS
MAEVETANNER not a lot going on at the moment

VIEW ALL COMMENTS

USERONE soooo pretty

USERTWO girl aren't you filming a movie rn

USERTHREE girl aren't you WRITING AN ALBUM RN

USERFOUR i'm in love with u

USERFIVE AAAHHH the taylor swift reference

TAIYOCURTIS only hobbies r being bitter and spiteful
MAEVETANNER it's what i was born for

USERSIX mav you are the coolest

USERSEVEN tell me what music you've been listening to!!!
MAEVETANNER reputation!! and everything maisie peters ❣️

USEREIGHT please drop smthn about ur new film i want bts pics

USERNINE maeve and xolo in a film together is driving me feral

LACYABU 💜💜
MAEVETANNER omg hi lacy

XOLO_MARIDUENA FOLLOWED MAEVETANNER!

THEJACOBBERTRAND FOLLOWED MAEVETANNER!

HAVENANGELICA FOLLOWED MAEVETANNER!

MAEVETANNER FOLLOWED HAVENANGELICA!

☆☆☆


"you have got to be kidding me," xolo sighed, his eyes meeting haven's as they glanced back at him from the passenger seat of jacob's car. she smirked playfully.

"my social impact is unrivalled," haven attempted to justify, causing her boyfriend to scoff.

"wrong. this just adheres to my theory that pretty people herd together."

"or former disney kids herd together?" haven tried. xolo shook his head disappointedly.

"no, that would've included jacob."

"maybe it's only pretty former disney kids."

jacob stuck his middle finger up at her playfully.

the trio pulled up to xolo's set, which was far busier than it had been the last week, bustling with extras, and somewhere, the people that were playing angel's family. the dreaded day had come where maeve and xolo would be filming their first kiss, and they were no closer to getting along than they were when they first met.

"thanks for the lift, jacob." xolo undid his seatbelt. "i'll catch you guys later."

"woah, woah, woah, buster," haven stopped him, unbuckling their own seatbelt, and jacob turned off the ignition. "you didn't think we offered to drive with you for moral support or something, did you? we're here to watch you and maeve kiss."

"you have to be kidding me." the brunette rolled his eyes.

"not in the slightest," jacob assured with a grin, and the three climbed out the car and wandered over to the trailers.

maeve was keeping herself to herself as she usually did. sitting in her chair in an overly large coat, she had one empty coffee cup by her feet and another half full one in her hand, yet her eyes were still half closed as she waited for someone to call the early start.

adrianna approached her with an overly joyful smile on her face.

"you ready to start for the day?"

"as i'll ever be," maeve responded, brushing a hand through her hair and standing up, unzipping the large coat and revealing her costume underneath.

"ooh i like her dress," haven commented, clocking her from about a hundred metres away as the trio approached.

          "for your sake, i hope that's not coffee in her hand," jacob pointed out. xolo furrowed his brows.

          "what do you mean? maeve is always drinking coffee. i'm not sure she can actually function without it. she's like, entirely fueled by caffeine and spite."

          "have you ever made out with someone straight after they've drunk a fuck tonne of coffee?" jacob side-eyed his girlfriend. "because i have, and it's disgusting."

rolling his eyes, xolo looked between his two friends.

          "look, guys, everything will be fine. it's just a kiss. it's not even just a kiss— it's a scripted kiss in a scene. now quit being pests and come watch if you insist. maybe now you can see how much she blatantly hates me for no reason."

shauny, xolo's makeup artist, eagerly ushered him into the tent as he introduced them to jacob and haven and sat down in the chair in order to get ready in record speed. maeve only had one scene to shoot alone before it was time for the moment xolo had been dreading since that awkward conversation over a week ago.

half an hour later, xolo was fully in character, and traipsing onto set followed by his eager friends. sure enough, maeve was there already, another paper cup in her hand that she finished and handed to one of the assistants gratefully before straightening out her skirt.

"alright you guys!" adrianna clapped her hands together joyfully. "before we start rolling, i want you guys to talk. get comfortable! you're playing two beautiful young people who love each other!"

walking off to check with the cinematographer, she left the two of them alone. maeve gave a quick, mostly sarcastic smile as she usually did, but when xolo didn't try to progress the conversation as he usually did, she rolled her eyes, cracking her knuckles loudly.

"so, who are your friends?"

"uh." the question caught the man off guard. "that's jacob, he's my housemate. and that's his girlfriend, haven."

"you have a thing for befriending disney kids then, huh?"

"i hadn't really thought about it." xolo paused for a moment, glancing back at his friends before asking, "was that coffee you were drinking earlier?"

"yep." a small smile appeared on maeve's lips, which would've been nice to finally see if it wasn't at xolo's expense. "i've had like five cups this morning. i hope you don't mind."

rolling his eyes, the man couldn't help but laugh just a little.

"you did that on purpose, didn't you?"

"well, i don't drink coffee by accident."

wandering back over, adrianna looked overjoyed to see her co-stars finally interacting.

"now, if you guys just go through blocking quickly, run through your lines, and we will be just about ready to film what i personally believe to be the most romantic kiss in the film— even though i'm not sure i'm allowed to say that, since angel and nico don't actually end up together."

"wow, no pressure then," xolo coughed, allowing himself to be moved around by the choreographers and saying his lines, receiving snipped responses from maeve.

once the blockers had stepped back, haven and jacob had been hushed to one side and adrianna had tucked herself behind the camera screens, xolo clenched and unclenched his palms a couple of times. he ran over the lines in his head, and the cues that maeve hadn't been all too helpful with.

looking him up and down, maeve sighed.

"you're nervous, aren't you?"

"what- no, i'm-"

"why are you nervous?"

"well." he paused for a moment, thankful adrianna was glancing down at her script, not quite ready to go. "i get the feeling you don't like me very much. and i've never kissed someone who, well, hated me before."

"hate is a strong word," maeve mused with her eyebrows raised, though she didn't deny anything. "and whether i like you or not is irrelevant, because i sure can kiss you like i do."

his eyebrows shot up at that, and it almost seemed like she was stifling a laugh.

"it's my job, remember?"

and job or not, maeve hadn't been lying. she kissed him in a way that made adrianna practically vibrate with glee, caused haven and jacob to raise eyebrows all around, and made her hating him suck so much more than it had before.

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