The Way to Love (Camren)

Chapter 12: Camila My Darling, Lauren My Dear

XII. 

"It is nothing shy of a blessing to be granted a time in our lives in which we are able to make a pivotal change. A chance to better ourselves, to breed something new, and to make of us something more beautiful that we were before. I'm ready for love. And I'm ready for you."

Lauren sat dumbfounded on the floor of her bedroom, staring at the sheer number of suitcases she had managed to haul from Miami to New York. It was good to be back, and although she swore frostbite had made a home on her cheeks the moment she stepped off the plane, it felt invigorating to get into the action once more. A new year meant a series of new resolutions, and one more prominent than the rest. Lauren swore to herself that before they got too far into the semester, she would either pull Normani's proverbial parachute, or bring out the trampoline.

Bidding farewell to her family was never easy, but Lauren had made herself a seasoned veteran. Having a warm, supportive household of girls by her side made it considerably easier.

Warm and supportive for the most part.

"Hey loser!" Lauren yanked the earphones from her ears as Dinah's voice echoed down into her room. "It's me, are you decent?"

"Yeah." Lauren stood, padding up the first set of steps to look at her roommate. "What's up?"

"Normani's home, and she got her car stuck in the entrance to the driveway. She was wondering if you could come and see if we can collectively push it out— or in I guess."

Lauren frowned. "Wait, what did she do?"

"Lauren my dear, I know it's been a while since you did any learning, but I just said Normani got her car stuck in the driveway. Is there really any better way to describe it? Just come and take a look." Dinah gestured for Lauren to emerge to the upstairs, then waited for her to pull on her boots and grab her blue - black ski jacket that had been sitting draped over the handle of the powder room door. When they both stepped outside, it was made quite clear to Lauren what Dinah had been talking about.

As per every holiday spent out of the house, the grumpy next door neighbour refused to shovel the girls' property, resulting in the snow plows going to town on the division of the driveway from the street. Normani had tried to drive over the massive snowbank, and her car had only made it about three quarters of the way up before getting completely stuck. When taking in account the wind, the blowing snow, and the fact that the sun was long gone, Lauren was able to deduce that this wasn't going to be a very fun first night back.

Lauren marched right up to Normani's front window, letting her knuckles rap on the glass with impatience. She hadn't seen the girl yet; Dinah and Ally had picked her up from the airport, while Normani had to head over and take the extra step in retrieving her car.

"Hey Lauren!" Normani gave her roommate a little wave, then a nervous smile. She rolled the window down just enough so her voice could be heard. "Happy New Year...?"

"Mani, how the fuck did this happen?" Lauren replied, not even addressing the half question, half proclamation. "You've completely bottomed out this hunk of scrap metal!"

"I thought the snow was soft!" Normani pouted, curling her lip up at the girl. "It's not my fault. And for the love of god, quit being mean to my car. She's my baby!"

Lauren tossed her hands up in the air. "Yes, because we've been away for three weeks, no one's shovelled the driveway, and it's been a constant blizzard since Christmas. The snow is totally going to be soft!"

"Don't you yell at me!"

"This is a free country, I can yell at you if I want to!"

"Okay, cut it out!." Dinah's mitts muffled Lauren's face, and she turned her head briskly, sputtering out a few stray pieces of wool from her mouth. "Listen up bitches. Ally's gone to pick up Camila from the airport. It's freezing out here, and all I want to do is go inside and watch the new season of Orange is the New Black. Can we please quit yelling at each other and push this damn car either in or out?"

"Hey, talk to Miss Grumpypants over here." Normani replied as she gave Lauren a teasing smile. "I'm willing to cooperate if she is."

"I hate you." Lauren huffed away, pulling her hood over head to keep the falling snow off her hair. Rounding to the rear end of the beaten up Ford Taurus, she gave the back wheels a once over, letting her gloved hands rest on the ice cold metal. "Alright. On three."

***

"So did you have a good flight?" Ally asked Camila as she slammed the trunk of her vehicle closed and slid behind the wheel.

"It wasn't bad. It's only an hour, so it's survivable no matter what." The girl replied through the apple that was trapped between her teeth. She then shivered, flicking on the button that heated the two front seats. "Although I could have done without the dude behind me with the really stinky feet. He took off his fucking shoes."

"Gross." Ally pulled down the dark road, squinting to ensure she took the proper exit off the freeway. The highway and main road system in the city was built in layers, which meant that getting lost was one of the easiest things to accomplish, even for a New York native. "Are you at least feeling better? It's supposed to be a freaking cold semester."

"Mmhm." Camila nodded through a mouthful of fruit. "I had to have lost at least a barrel of brain cells from all the sneezing I was doing. I'm going to kill Lauren."

The girls pulled into the East Village and down the road towards the house. Ally slowed the car when the driveway came into view, and looked to see a rather unique scene illuminated by the streetlights.

"What the heck is happening?" Ally jerked her car into neutral, pushing the door open and gesturing for Camila to do the same.

"Maybe we can shovel it more!" They heard Normani shout from inside her car.

"We've already shovelled a solid patch around both back wheels!" Dinah yelled back from the other end.

"Well keep going! It's helping!"

Dinah made a rather animated noise of frustration. "Mani! If I shovel any more, I'm going to hit CHINA."

Camila rested her apple core on the roof of Ally's car, leaning against the cold metal and smiling. It was good to be home. "Where's Lauren?" She then asked as the shorter girl walked around the car to stand beside her.

"I don't know, maybe she's inside?" Ally offered, looking towards the entrance of the house.

"NORMANI YOU DUMBASS! PUT THE FUCKING CAR IN FORWARD, NOT REVERSE!" An unnaturally loud voice boomed from behind the lodged vehicle.

"Found her." Ally muttered. "I feel like we might have left the OT3 alone for a little too long. Let's get in there before they kill each other."

Camila laughed, taking off in the direction of the voice. She saw Lauren, her back pressed to the tail lights of the car, heels digging hard into the snow beneath her. Her eyes were hidden beneath the brim of her hood, but her dark hair still flew in the wind. "Lauren!"

Before she knew it, Lauren's arms were full of Camila. The girl had stood up at the sound of her name, and lifted her hood off her head momentarily to see her roommate advancing towards her. She felt the smaller girl's legs wrap around her waist, and backed up so she could fall freely into the snowbank a few feet away. Something sharp dug into her back, but she was way too thrilled to care. A rush of relief mixed with pure joy surged through Lauren, and she instantly wanted it to last forever.

"It's so good to see you Camz. I missed you so much" Lauren spoke into the fur of Camila's white jacket, crushing the girl close to her. Her heart was running a marathon in her chest, and for a split second, nothing mattered to her but the fact that they were back together.

"Oh my god I missed you more." Camila replied, laughing as she propped herself up on her hands and grinned down at Lauren. "What happened here? How the heck did she get her car stuck?"

"Oh you know, just an average day at the office. Normani fucked herself into a hole, and we're trying to dig her out of it." Lauren saw Camila's nose crinkle at the wording, and she laughed, pushing herself up off the snow. The movement of her body caused Camila to tilt backwards and sit straddled on her lap. "She thought the snowbank was soft."

"Seriously?"

"Hey John and Yoko!" Normani yelled from out the window again. "Can the two of you get your asses up and help here? I really don't want to have to call a tow truck to come to my driveway. They're already mad at me because I drove in through the exit of a parking garage then busted my tire on a pothole!"

"Maybe we can call the boys and ask if they can bring some of those metal shovels they have. It might be easier to chip away at the ice with something that isn't plastic." Ally suggested.

"Oh I already called them." Dinah walked around with her phone in her hand and mitten in between her teeth. "Three times already with no answer. Mani, I'm pretty sure you're going to need to call a crane. The underside of the car is like... frozen to the ground."

"Goddammit." Normani stepped outside, slamming the door behind her and taking a few steps back to assess the damage. "I hate my life. I really do."

"You know, we're really not all that crazy about ours right now either." Lauren grinned, nudging Camila off her lap and taking her arm to hoist herself up.

Normani used Dinah's phone to call her tow truck contact, explaining the situation to the dispatch operator, and giving their address. Ten minutes later, the team of mechanics and a tow truck showed up, and the men went to work hooking up the Ford Taurus while the girls stood in a timid line, watching from the side of the driveway like curious kittens.

"So how did this happen?" One of the bearded workers walked over with a debit machine in his hand. "You got yourself stuck in the entrance to your driveway?"

"She thought it was going to be sof-mmmph!" Lauren's words got cut off by Normani's mittens while Camila giggled beside her. Spitting out the tendrils of wool that got caught on her lips again, Lauren was sure she was going to end up ingesting an entire sheep by the time the night was over.

"I figured I had a chance of making it." Normani replied sweetly. "Sorry about that."

"Alright, no problem, it happens to the best of us. We're just going to need you to sign for a few things before we get started. Payment can be made once the job is done."

Normani nodded, stepping forward and discussing some terms and conditions with the man. Meanwhile, Lauren heard a sharp squeal, and turned around to see Dinah with her shoulders up to her ears in shock.

"What happened?" Lauren looked from Dinah's scrunched up face, over to Camila's smug one, and instantly put the pieces together. Camila had a snowball in one hand, and was packing more in the other.

"You little dipshit." Dinah turned around and growled at Camila, her light brown eyes flashing. "Come here." The Polynesian launched herself over to the brunette, and Camila laughed before falling on her back and trying to keep Dinah from shoving even more snow down her neck.

"Why must you be such children?" Ally sighed as she folded her arms up and balanced her weight on one foot.

Lauren replied by flicking up her hood and letting a snowball soar towards the eldest. It hit her square in the shoulder, and she looked up in shock. "Oh it's so on." The Texan grinned, kneeling down and forming another snowy sphere and hurling it over at her roommate. The girl spun out of the way, repeating the action with a laugh.

By the time Normani's car was lifted into the driveway and the icy snowbank was neatly cleared, Lauren and the rest were soaked, freezing, and completely out of breath.

***

"Classes don't start until Thursday." Ally was saying as the girls filed into the house and dumped their wet jackets off by the front door. "I'm going to spend the whole day tomorrow at one of our clinics, do you guys want to come along? We could use some top notch help to do a little organizing on our storage floor."

"Ugh, I can't, I've got an academic advisor meeting." Normani replied with a grumble as she followed Ally. "There's been a conflict with my schedule, so I've got to go and talk to the ignoramuses on the board about my pre-requisites."

"I've got to work." Dinah said apologetically as she dumped a bunch of Camila's bags down on the living room floor. "Ariana's still in Sacramento, so everyone who's here needs to work double time to make up for the lost hands. Although it will be good to get a little pocket money in before the semester even starts. My shift schedule sucks."

"What about you guys?" Ally turned to Lauren and Camila hopefully. "It's kind of fun if you have nothing to do, and we really do need the hand to sort through some of the equipment."

Lauren looked over at Camila, who was gazing right back at her. "What do you say? I'm not doing anything."

"I think we should do it." Camila nodded. "I'd like to see what the facility looks like. I'm in if you are."

Lauren grinned. 'Alright. Let's do it."

As Lauren and Camila both headed up the stairs with suitcases and began unpacking the brunette's clothes, Dinah and Normani both turned to Ally.

"One more push, right Hernandez?"

Ally just nodded.

"One more push."

***

"Wow Ally, this place is amazing!" Ally was flanked on either side by her roommates as they walked down the white walled hall. The building was a modern anomaly in an old fashioned neighbourhood, its glass ceilings and translucent accents allowed for plenty of natural sunlight that greatly assisted the heating system in warming the building.

"It's a relatively new facility, completely funded by the university. We have separate wings for all the different types of work." Ally explained as they walked. "People can come in, get a free consultation, then formally register for whatever it is they might need." The trio turned a few corners as the conversation proceeded.

"Like what?" Camila was genuinely curious. Just being in a clinic setting was exciting for her.

"Premature infants, child rehab, patients with autism and down syndrome." Ally began listing the practices off the top of her head. "We do lots of stuff for adolescents as well, like anxiety, depression and mood disorders. The east wing also handles more hands-on treatment for things like heart disease, strokes and amnesia." Ally thought for a moment. "Psychiatric disorders... schizophrenia and psychosis. Everything that's listed on the website and the brochures fall under a certain category, but if you come in with any problem at all, we can do our best to help you out. We had a gentleman come in once who was looking for comfort after the passing of his long time wife, and a patient with a terminal illness who needed to ease the pain. Both were very rewarding experiences."

"That's amazing." Camila could feel Lauren's eyes on her as she took a few steps ahead of them both and stared upwards, watching the ceiling move as she did. "And you do it all with music?"

"Pretty much, yeah. I mean it all depends on the person and their preferences, but the concept of rhythmic consistency, unique beats and meaningful lyrics can all make a serious difference in people's lives. It doesn't even need to be on a clinical level, music helps people all the time."

"I can vouch for that." Lauren added. "But the whole concept of it is really cool."

"Sure is." Ally smiled. "The ninth floor is used solely for instrument storage. It's awesome, but super cluttered right now. That's what the two of you are here for."

"So we're going to sort and organize? I think I can be down with that." Lauren piped as she snagged Camila's hood and pulled her back so they were walking just behind Ally again. A few more seconds, and Camila was guaranteed to crash into something, or even worse, someone.

Ally led them over to an elevator that sat at the end of the hall. "I'm glad to hear it, it's going to be quite the job."

"Could we maybe meet some patients as well?" Camila asked hesitantly as they ascended to the ninth floor.

"Camz..." Lauren warned, understanding that the question held a considerable amount of weight. There had to be some kind of consent forms you would have to sign, or a background check of some sort before you could meet patients.

Ally was quiet for a moment. "Nah, it's okay." She shot Lauren a kind smile. "Actually, I have some interns in a little later today that are going to be leading a group session with some younger kids." Ally pondered. "I could probably get you in to watch the session, and maybe take part in it if you'd be willing to. We could always use the help."

The elevator arrived, and the girls made their way down the empty hallway and towards one of the rooms. "That would be so cool." Camila gave Lauren a grin. "I would love that."

"I'll see what I can do." Ally unlocked the door and let it swing open. "But in the meantime, you two have a little bit of a job to do."

"Right." Lauren proceeded to nudge Camila into the room, her eyes widening when she saw exactly what the word "clutter" meant to Ally. "Holy crap."

The room wasn't large, but it was packed to the brim with every kind of instrument Lauren could possibly think of, and more. They sat in boxes, on shelves, and leaned up against any free wall space that may have existed at one point. Camila had made a little noise when realized the work that they had cut out before them as well.

"I'm thinking the best way to go about it, would be to organize by type. Brass, strings, wind... etc. There are hooks on the walls to use, and labelling tape in the back room." Ally scooted around the girls and hovered by the entrance for a moment. "Good luck ladies, if you need me just give me a call. I'll come back to get you in a few hours."

"Thanks Ally." Lauren nodded as the girl disappeared back down the hall. She then turned to Camila, tying her hair up in a neat ponytail while they both ditched their coats. "You ready to get started?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." The Cuban replied. "I'll get the tape, you start bringing down those boxes?"

"So how was the rest of your holiday?" Lauren asked, moving aside some pieces of a drum set to stand on her toes and bring down one of the cardboard boxes. It rattled as she set it down. "I mean besides the sickness."

"It was okay." Camila had set the package of labels down on the grand piano and was doing her best to pull it apart. "It was nice to relax... just be back home with my sister."

"She's such an angel." Lauren commented. "Unlike mine."

"Taylor's hilarious." The brunette replied. For some reason, she was feeling unnaturally awkward. Small talk was something that always seemed to come easy to Camila, but whatever it was about the situation was causing her brain to struggle through forming complete sentences. "She must keep you on your toes."

Lauren sighed, lifting the box in her arms up and pulling out a tambourine, giving it a little shake. "I guess you could say that."

"And do you really have My Little Pony bedsheets?"

Lauren rolled her eyes. "I had them when I was young. My mother thought for some reason ponies with pupils the size of their heads would help me sleep."

"And did they?"

"Oh yeah."

The small talk continued through the rest of the day, and with a little bit of patience and a lot of teamwork, the girls managed to organize the room. With Camila's touch, the instruments were all filed in a near perfect manner, each brass had their proper case, drums were stacked neatly, and xylophones were all dusted and covered with padded tarps. The perfect team had been formed by combining Lauren's muscle with Camila's organizational prowess.

When they were through, Camila sat down on the piano bench, crossing her legs underneath her and leaning against the finished wooden cover. A moment later, she felt Lauren join her.

"I know you haven't mentioned it yet... but Camz, did you want to talk about that cryptic phone conversation you had before you left?" Lauren asked. Her voice was quiet, yet it filled the room.

Camila let her hands drift through her hair. "I've been trying not to think about it. This really is the last thing I need to deal with right now."

"I understand. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"I just wish my Mom wouldn't keep secrets from me." Camila continued, draping her hair over one shoulder and looking over at her roommate. "I spent most of my high school career having to deal with the fact that my Dad was blatantly lying to me. Even my Mom lied to me about my brother back then, telling me there was nothing wrong, and that I shouldn't worry about it." Camila stopped. "And I should have been worrying about it. Everything that happened back then had just as much to do with her, as it did with me."

"I agree." Lauren replied. "But..."

"And the worst part was that I let it all happen. I stood there and took it, because I was too much of a wimp to pursue any information that hadn't been handed to me." Camila didn't let Lauren cut in, she was on a roll.

"Now we're back to square one. Something's happened, someone I know has died, and all signs point to the fact that it was my brother. My brother. I thought about it on the flight over here... it sounded like my father on the phone, Lauren. But I just can't believe she would go and openly talk to him like that. I thought we had moved on from this chapter of our lives."

Lauren played with her fingers, then pulled the tie from her hair and let it drop down around her shoulders. "I said it before and I'll say it again." She spoke softly. "Death brings people together. Sometimes even people who may never would have crossed paths otherwise."

Camila watched Lauren's hair fall. "Hey..." She said, deviating from the topic at hand for a moment. "Your hair."

"Hmm?" Lauren leaned back, trailing both hands through the heavy locks then letting them settle again. "What's wrong? Does it look bad? Is it ugly?"

"No." Camila shook her head with a small laugh. "Oh my god of course not. You're letting it go back to brown, I can see it on the ends."

Lauren gathered her hair between her fingers, drawing it up and holding it in front of her face. "Yeah..." She stammered. "I... I got really careless before leaving for Miami, and forgot to pack that box of black hair dye Normani bought for me a few weeks ago. I don't know... I was thinking it wouldn't be a bad idea to give it a rest for a little while. Just let it fade out to its natural colour."

"I like it." Camila smiled, her eyes scanning up and down Lauren's long hair. "Your natural colour is actually really pretty, I saw it in some of those pictures you have down in your bedroom."

"Thanks." Lauren blushed. "That's sweet."

Both girls were silent for a moment, and Lauren figured it wouldn't hurt to ask the question that sat on the tip of her tongue. "Hey Camila?"

"Yeah?"

"You can get mad at me for this if you want, but....I mean I agree with the fact that your Mom is lying to you about this being pretty messed up." She admitted. "But I think what might be affecting you more is the fact that your brother could actually be gone."

Camila looked up again while Lauren continued.

"When you told me about him for the first time; the way you described him made it seem like he was all bad. Like he abandoned you, followed your Dad and betrayed your Mom in one fell swoop." Lauren swallowed nervously. "But the more you talked about him, the more I felt like despite how angry you are at him... you might miss him. I mean those times at the beach, when your Dad left... all those memories aren't just gone now, are they?"

Camila shook her head. "God no." She said quietly. "They're not gone. You're right."

You wanted him to pick up that phone, didn't you? You told me you didn't want to do it, and you said you were scared to talk to him... but despite all that, you wanted him to answer."

Camila nodded, blinking away what was quick to turn into tears. She didn't understand how Lauren could turn her into a pile of mush so quickly. There had never been anyone in her life who could strike her as hard as the Miami native seemed to so often do.

"You know..." Camila reached over to move the cover block off the piano and set it up on its hinge, exposing the keys. "Daniel was the first person to ever teach me how to play the piano." She admitted, pressing down on a chord and letting it ring gently through the room. The instrument was clearly older, and gave off a rustic, well-aged sound. Camila preferred that over an electronic keyboard. Older objects in general tended to charm her; she loved how everything had a story attached.

"He was the one who told me that music was such an important thing, and that I was talented."

"You are talented."

"Not really." Camila shook her head, pressing down on a new, higher chord. "He wrote his own music when he was young. We would play the piano together, and he would teach me the words to all his favourite songs." Camila let her fingers brush over a new chord, but didn't press down quite yet. "Remember when I told you that I performed in a talent show a long time ago?"

"Yeah." Lauren nodded. "When we were out on the lake."

"Right. Well it was Dan who convinced me to even give it a shot. I was concerned that people might make fun of me, and he told me that he would hurt anyone who did so, and..."

"And?"

"And it didn't matter what people thought about you. That you just had to do what made you happy, and what made you the most comfortable. He taught me that living for you was more important than living for anyone else. You're born with you, you're going to die with you, and so you need to learn to love you... no matter how difficult that might be, or how long it might take."

Somewhere deep inside, Camila wanted nothing more than for Lauren to hear her words. She hit the chord right as she finished talking, then looked over at her roommate who was staring down at her fingers with steady intent. She continued.

"That wasn't all he taught me though. When we were on a family trip to the supermarket one morning, I thought it would be funny to steal a few mangos from one of the vendor stalls. I was only five. Dan caught me, and he lectured me on the importance of being genuine. He told me that hiding things from people never gets you anywhere, and that you should always be open, and honest. People who are fair and authentic like that are the most trustworthy."

Lauren nodded, taking a deep breath. Open and honest. She told herself. Come on. You can be open and honest. You can tell her. Before she could open her mouth, Camila continued.

"I guess there have been a lot of times in my life where I've had to push through and move on. To forget about the overhanging conflict, and focus on bettering myself. I mean... he isn't a significant part of my life anymore, and he hasn't been for years. Whatever happens, this is just going to be another one of those things. It's sad, but I guess if there's one thing I've learnt up until now, there are some things that just won't work out the way you want them to. Some things that are just unavoidable."

Come on Lauren. Now.

"Camila?"

Camila removed her hands from the keys, looking over again. "Yeah?"

"I need to tell you something. Something happened on the Friday before we left for the holidays. I wanted to tell you earlier, but... I felt like it would be best to be said in person."

Camila's pulse began to race. She folded her hands up and tucked them at her sides, wrapping her arms around her waist protectively. The Latina hadn't been sure when Lauren was going to bring up the whole "Ariana party" event, but she knew it would likely happen sooner rather than later. "Y...yeah? What's that?"

"I.-" Lauren's voice was cut off as the door swung open.

"Hey ladies. Wow! This room looks amazing! You guys did such a good job!" Ally had her phone out and was taking a series of flash enhanced pictures of the walls and floors. You guys are the best."

"Thanks." Camila hopped off the piano bench, making her way over to Ally happily and leaving Lauren sitting with a stupid look on her face.

"Do you think we can go do the patient thing?"

"Yeah totally!" Ally nodded, gesturing for Lauren to get up and follow. "So the group of kids are a shy bunch who have had some problems adjusting at home. The circumstances are different for all of them, and range from dealing with divorce, to families fighting, to issues at school with teachers. It's nothing too intense, so I think it'd be perfect for you two."

Needless to say, the group was very much perfect. While Lauren puttered off to teach a few children how to hold some chords on the acoustic guitar, Camila's attention went to a small blonde boy who was sitting cross-legged in the corner of the room. He was dressed in a red soccer jersey and black shorts, both articles of clothing looked far too big on his tiny body. His head was in his arms, and his knees were curled up, forming him into a tiny ball. "Ally." Camila nudged her roommate. "Is he okay?"

Ally sighed. "His name is Emmett. He's eight years old, and has been registered for weekly sessions since the fall because of serious mood swings and rapid weight loss. He witnessed his father abusing both his siblings and his mother, so he's very afraid of people he doesn't know." As Camila took a step towards the boy, Ally took her arm gently. "Mila, I know what you're thinking right now, but Emmett isn't like Sofia, or any of the kids you've interacted with before. He's extremely fragile, and the most we've got him to do is explore the drums a few times. We think he likes them, but he never gets very far regardless."

"I just want to talk to him." Camila replied as she noticed Lauren laughing with a small brown haired girl against her hip. "I'll be careful, I promise."

Ally nodded. "Okay, but if anything happens then please let me know."

"Hi." Camila said softly as she walked over and sat down on the carpet next to the boy, crossing her own legs underneath her. "What's your name?" There was no response, in fact the child actually turned away from Camila, tightening his limbs.

"I'm Camila."

Still nothing.

"So I hear you like the drums?" Camila extended her legs, leaning back and stretching out on the carpet. She let her hands slip underneath her head, using them as cushion from the ground. "You know, when I was young, I used to sit on my kitchen floor and pull out all the pots and pans from the drawers. I would organize them around me upside-down, and use two wooden spoons to bang on the undersides. I loved making noise when I was a kid, but my parents always thought it was so annoying, and they yelled at me to stop."

Camila still wasn't getting any sign of life from the boy, but she wasn't about to give up. "I know how it feels you know." She tried. "Maybe you don't like being away from the people you know so well. You don't like being forced to do things you don't want to do, and even though everyone tells you that it might help you, and that you should give it a chance... all you really want is to make your own choices."

Nothing.

"Maybe you've seen some pretty bad things, and you think there might have been a way you could have prevented those bad things from happening. Maybe you've seen the people you love very sad, when all you wanted was to see them happy."

Still nothing.

"Well sometimes, after a long time has passed, those bad things might not seem as bad anymore. All of those bad things have given you wounds. They've given you scars, and made you hurt. But they've also made you a better person because you learn, and grow, and fight through them all. All of that fighting makes you stronger, and very...very beautiful."

Camila hesitated for a moment.

"You know, there is a special type of drum that's made out of a very soft, smooth material, stretched over a circular bowl-shaped piece of wood. It's stretched very thin, and it's secured with rope or wire all around the sides so it stays in place and doesn't move, or cave in. When this drum is played, large wooden sticks are used to strike the surface of the drum over and over again. Eventually, the thin material becomes weaker, and if it's struck too many times, it will break."

There was a small hint of movement, just the jerk of a leg from the boy. Camila continued confidently.

"But no matter how many times this drum is broken, it can be rebuilt. We can find a new material, and we can stretch it out over the wood to create a new, better drum. Does that make sense?"

Camila's heart soared when she saw from the corner of her eye, that the boy lifted his head. She couldn't quite get a good look at his face, for she didn't look at him directly. "I guess I'm trying to say that no matter how many times this drum caves in, you can always find a way to repair it."

A moment of quiet surrounded both of them, and Camila could feel Ally's curious gaze lingering on her.

"My... my name is Emmett." The boy said quietly.

"That's a really awesome name." Camila smiled up at the ceiling. "Emmett like from the Lego movie."

"I love Lego." Emmett replied, bringing his slender legs down and crossing them on the carpet. "My sisters like to play Lego with me when they come home from school."

"Well that sounds like lots of fun." Camila remarked.

"Um... Camila?" Camila's heart fluttered at the sound of her name coming from the young boy.

"Yes?"

"Thank you for... for telling me all those nice things." He said quietly. "I never imagined there would ever be someone out there who feels the same way I feel."

"How do you feel Emmett?" Camila asked, sitting up slowly and looking at the boy for the first time. He was precious; his long blonde hair hung shaggily over his eyes, and hid most of his face, but Camila could see his deep brown eyes full of struggle and anguish.

"I feel..." Emmett looked up at her, brushing his hair out of his eyes. There was wetness on his cheeks. "I feel..."

Camila held out a hand, and Emmett got to his feet slowly, walking over to her and placing his own hand within it. Camila gently guided him so he was sitting on her lap, his head resting on her chest. "I feel like everyone is trying to make me do things I hate doing. My teachers... they call on me in class, and they humiliate me. They sign me up for activities, and make me go to summer camp. My Mom... she sends me here and I don't know anyone."

Camila cradled the child close to her, feeling his body tremble as he began to cry. The protrusion of his ribs were evident through the fabric of his jersey. "They try to make me happy by getting me to do things I just don't want to do. They don't listen to me, it's not fair."

"You're right, it's not." The Latina agreed. She had turned around, so her back was facing all the other children, and Emmett was the only thing she could see. "It's not fair that you're overlooked, and pushed so hard. It's not fair that you're screaming as loud as you can, but no one is listening to you." She brushed the boy's soft hair out of his face, then swiped the pads of her thumbs underneath his eyes to wipe away the tears. "It's not fair that someone as beautiful as you isn't happy... because you deserve to be."

Emmett began to cry harder as he heard Camila speak, and for the first time in her life, the Latina saw a child who was truly struggling. She also couldn't believe he was the same age as Sofi. The way he spoke was so poetic and insightful. His sobs turned louder, and soon, all the children were gathered around, watching with curiosity.

"Camz... is everything here okay?" Lauren's voice was heard just behind Camila, and she nodded silently, drawing the boy in her arms closer to her and clutching his head to her chest. She used her body to shield away from the eyes of the others, while Ally and her interns began ushering them back to the instruments that now sat vacant on the other side of the room.

"It's okay." Camila whispered. "You can cry. You can be scared, and you can let yourself feel all those things that people have told you that you shouldn't."

When his cries didn't slow, Ally reappeared, and knelt down behind Camila, speaking slowly. "Mila. Emmett's mother is just outside, and his time here is just about over. I think it would be best if he left now."

Camila nodded, and Ally rose to her feet once more to give them some space.

"No." Emmett sobbed. "Camila, I want to stay with you some more."

Camila could hardly believe that she wasn't bawling. "Emmett, look at me." She commanded, lifting his head forcefully, and cupping his cheeks. "You've taken huge strides today. All of those things you've admitted to me? This massive step you've taken out of your comfort zone? That is you striking your own drum. Do you remember what I said?"

"Yes." Emmett nodded, wiping his eyes and slowing his breathing. "I remember. I can rebuild the drum when it caves in."

"Right." Camila mustered a brave smile of her own. "And there's no end to how many times you can rebuild it. You're going to need to rebuild it many... many times before it's strong enough to handle anything. Can you do that for me? Do you promise you'll rebuild the drum every time someone breaks it?"

"I promise."

"Good." Camila lifted the boy off her lap, and brushed his hair so it was tucked behind his ears. "Now your Mom is waiting out there. So go and show her."

Just before he left, Emmett took in a deep, shaky breath, and placed his hands gently on Camila's shoulders. He then leaned in and gave the girl a sweet peck on the cheek before turning and following Ally and the rest of the children out to the waiting room. The Latina was left stunned as she brought her right hand up to brush her fingers against the skin.

"Camila, that was incredible." Lauren's voice was there again, soft in her ear. Camila picked herself up off the ground and turned around, not even asking before she let herself fall into Lauren's grip and losing herself in her roommate's intoxicating presence. She had asked Ally if she could take part in this as a form of experience. She never expected it to change her entire outlook on children. Lauren's voice sounded close to her ear once more.

"You're incredible."

***

The car ride home was relatively silent, for Lauren knew that Camila was only moments away from bursting into tears. There was an air of tension in the vehicle, and despite the number of times both Ally and Lauren tried to cut it, they both knew it wasn't happening.

"Can you drop us off on 54th?" Lauren asked, her eye catching Camila in the backseat. The brunette was staring out the window, hardly listening to the conversation up front. "Just on the corner. Where that little café is."

"Sure thing." Ally nodded with a small smile.

"Why are we stopping?" Camila asked five minutes later as Ally pulled up to a stop by the curb, and let the engine stall.

"You're coming with me." Lauren had walked around and opened her door. "Back when we were home, I told you that I was going to do something fun with you to take your mind off of everything. Well I'm still holding my word, and although this might not be fun, it's going to be relaxing, so get your booty out of the car."

Camila sighed as she stepped outside. "Lauren, I really just want to go home, unpack the rest of the crap on my bedroom floor and go to bed."

"And you can still do that." Lauren replied as she thanked Ally and took Camila's hand, leading her up over a snowbank and further onto the salt-covered sidewalk. "But not until you eat something. And there's still a few things that I need to talk to you about."

Once inside, Camila found her way to the back of the café, settling down in the warmth of the couches. She frequented this particular establishment almost every morning, and since the winter break they had added some additional amenities, such as a fully functional living room area that was fit with furniture.

There weren't many customers, so she was able to kick her boots off and stretch her long limbs on the furniture horizontally. The dim lightning, and quiet mood music was charming, and Camila was quickly finding comfort in the atmosphere of the building.

Lauren was quick to order two mugs of tea, pomegranate raspberry for Camila and honey for herself. She also grabbed a few yogurt covered pretzels, and the last vanilla bear-claw.

Dusk fell over the city as the girls chatted away while nibbling at the food. When crumbs were all that remained, Camila ended up with her head rested on Lauren's shoulder and her legs folded up behind her. Lauren had her own legs crossed over each other, her cheek on Camila's forehead.

"Camz, can we talk?" Lauren said softly.

"Haven't we been doing that all day?" Camila asked with a smile, shifting her head up so her nose bumped Lauren's chin.

"About Ariana's party."

"Right. Okay."

"Excuse me, but I was just siting over there, and I couldn't help but notice that you were quite intriguing." A voice that definitely didn't come from Lauren was heard just a few feet away. Both girls sat up in confusion, and Lauren instinctively moved to cup Camila's elbow and draw her just a touch closer.

The man stood at an average height, and slender build with sandy blonde hair that was gelled up neatly. Through the dim lightning, Lauren wasn't able to get a proper look at his face, but she could tell he wore a pair of black framed reading glasses, making him look rather intellectual. His clothing was standard, consisting of a swamp green peacoat and grey slacks. The other thing Lauren was sure of was that he was staring straight at Camila.

"Um... thank you?" The brunette replied. There was a hint of confusion in her voice.

"No, the pleasure is all mine. I was wondering if maybe you weren't doing anything right now, I could interest you in a tarot card reading."

Lauren pulled her hand through her hair. You have got to be kidding me right now.

"Really? That would actually be pretty cool." Camila used Lauren's thigh as leverage to sit up further, while the man took a seat on the couch opposite theirs, and pulled a black bag from the sleeve of his coat.

"Tarot readings stem from a practice dating back as far as the fourteenth century in some parts of Northern Italy." The man explained as he undid the drawstring of the bag and slipped his slender hand inside, pulling out a thick deck of cards. They were larger than standard playing cards, and were backed with a rustic, brown-gold pattern.

"Do you do readings like this a lot?" Camila asked.

"You could say that." The man gave her a smile, a glitter in his eye. "When you spend thirty years of your life learning the secrets of a certain art, you tend to develop a certain set of skills that enhance your capability within that art." His movements were quick and fluid, and in the blink of an eye, the cards were spread out in a perfect fan. Even Lauren had to admit it was impressive.

"That's amazing." Camila leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees. "So what do I do?"

"First, allow me to ask your name."

"Camila."

"Good. Now Camila, is there any aspect of your life that you'd like to be informed further of? Perhaps, occupationally, financially, romantically?"

"Love." Camila didn't even have to think about it before she responded. "I want to know more about my love life."

"Ah, very good." The man gestured to the cards. "Now let me ask you. Is there a man with whom you are in love? A relationship in which you are currently devoted?"

Camila shook her head. "No." She answered. "I didn't actually think about that. Is that going to be a problem?"

The man smiled. "Gracious no. In fact, that's going to make this reading all the more interesting." He then placed both hands on the table. "The spread is going to be as so. Before you, I will assign slots for one row of three cards. From left to right, those three cards will represent the past, present and future of your romantic endeavours. This could include anything from potential relationships to partner preferences. Does that make sense?"

Camila just nodded.

"Additionally, I will have you place down two more cards, one just above either side of the row. The card on the left will represent you. The card on the right will represent a romantic partner with whom you will be the most connected.

"This is so cool. Lauren, isn't this cool?" There was no response. "Lauren?" Looking behind her, Camila noticed that Lauren had closed her eyes and was curled against the back pillows of the couch with her head resting on her hands. Camila rolled her eyes with a smile, then turned her attention back to the man. "Sorry... she has the attention span of a fruit-fly."

The man chuckled, then gestured to the cards once more. "I need you to pick five cards, one for each slot of the spread."

Camila did so carefully, watching as the man rearranged them into the pattern he had described earlier. When he was through, he looked at her.

"Shall we begin?"

***

The man began by turning over the left-most of the three cards. The picture on the other side was of a young boy, sitting on what looked like a stone wall outdoors. He was holding something in his hand, and was positioned between two staffs that were topped with fire.

"The two of wands." The man spoke. "This is an interesting card for your first pull. In this card, the boy is working towards a goal, which in his case is creating fire. You'll notice however, he is not looking at the energy in his hand, but he is staring out into the distance. In the past, there were challenges in your life either physical or emotional that caused you to feel distracted. The boy in the card is alone, suggesting that perhaps there was a series of events that have left you less interested in forging new relationships, and instead intent on focusing all your energy in solitude and study... just as he has."

"That's kind of unfortunate, don't you think?" Camila asked, her eyes trained down on the picture before her. "The fact that he's alone?"

"Maybe so." The man nodded. "But consider this. He is wearing red, which means he is enthusiastic and optimistic about the future. He is playing with fire, which is a sign that perhaps he has little fear, for fire is known as the element of life, but also of destruction. His hands are also both extended, and his palms face upward. This could mean that he is willing to both give and receive."

Camila bit her lip while the man moved to flip over the next card. The picture was of another male character, dressed in what looked like a tunic. He had shoulder length hair, and stood with his arms extended before him.

"Ah, Transfiguration." The man smiled. "I haven't seen this card appear in a spread for quite a few months."

"What does it mean?"

"Well, the essence of the Transfiguration card is just that. Transfiguration. Metamorphosis. Change. Often, drawing the card in the present slot is an indication that perhaps you are moving from a rather mundane place in your life to one with more beauty, excitement, and in your case – love. You can see that in the card, the man is transforming into a butterfly, a creature that has long been the symbol of change due to its rather unique lifecycle."

"So you're saying that there might be a transformation happening now?"

"Perhaps." The man nodded. "You could also be waiting for transformation to happen. Maybe a transformation has already happened, and you wish for it to be reversed. It all depends on the way you see the card."

"Hmm..." Camila thought for a moment, then nodded. "Okay. Let's see the future."

The man chuckled. "Ah, I see you're catching on." He slowly flipped the third card so the face was revealed. On this card was yet another person, a woman who was sitting behind a device that resembled a wheel used to spin fabric. The wheel was marked with various symbols that looked like greek letters.

"It's a wheel."

"It's the Wheel of Fortune." The man grinned. "That's a very good card to be seeing for the future. The Wheel of Fortune dictates unexpected good luck, prosperity in the field of destiny, chance, fate and probability. The wheel can also be a representation of life, of new beginnings and progressive evolution."

"So this is a good thing?"

"I'd say so, yes."

"What do the markings on the wheel mean?"

"Those markings correspond to the astrological signs, an indication that this card is very much associated with long lived tradition. On the side, there is also the glyph for the planet Jupiter, which is the planet often associated with luck and expansion. Perhaps this card is a sign of a pivotal time in your life? A change for the better?"

Camila was starting to get uncomfortable at how accurately this man was pinpointing her. At the same time though, she was intrigued. "Cool, let's see the other two."

The man flipped over the left card first. "So for you, it seems as if we have been presented with the Initiate card. This card is well known for being naïve and innocent. A newcomer who is untested, and has yet to prove herself. She is near a bonfire, which is a physical manifestation of her will and desire."

"Her bag is glowing."

"Glowing with potential of many types. With emptiness that has yet to be filled. In love, this card tells me that you have yet to feel true love, but you are very much ready."

Camila rested her chin on her hands again. "Wow..." She marvelled at the artwork on the card. Someone had clearly taken a lot of time to craft so many symbolic images onto such a small surface.

The man flipped over the card on the upper right, then smiled. "And as for your partner's card, we have the Ace of Cups."

"Is that good?"

The man nodded. "The Ace of Cups is highly sought after, for it is the card that represents honesty and free flowing emotion. You can't see it in this rendition of the card, but there is water in this cup, which reflects the blue of the sky. The mermaid underneath represents the prospect of a new world within the water, one in which you can gaze into the depths and discover new, exciting things. The leaves all around the cup are orange, because the suit of cups represents the season of autumn."

"But what does that say about the person?" Camila asked after he was finished. She had seen the Ace of Cups card before, it was often the one on the front of the box, or talked about in the movies.

"Well, the cup is an item used for many different purposes. For toast and celebration, to provide water needed for survival, to hold alcohol in which we drown our sorrows. Perhaps the person you seek should be fluent in free flowing emotion. Someone who is not afraid to tell you what they think, how they feel, or what you mean to them. Perhaps that is the person you should be looking for."

"Awesome." Camila smiled up at the man. "That's so cool how you did that."

"I must say Camila." The man gathered the cards, piling them together once more. "The cards you chose were very straightforward. Very linear, as if they told a story that wasn't difficult to follow." He paused before standing up. "I'd like you to keep this deck of cards, as a gift from me."

"Oh no, I can't take these from you." Camila's eyes widened as the man placed the small drawstring bag on the table beside her. "I'm sure they're very important."

"Camila my darling, as someone who has been in this business for many years, I can confidently tell you there are many more where that came from. I believe they are more important to you than they are to me." The man nodded politely, buttoning his jacket.

"Wow, thank you." Camila slid the deck inside the bag carefully, tightening the fabric string and setting them down. "So what's your-... huh?" When Camila looked up, the man had vanished. Of course. She twisted around with a sigh, realizing Lauren was still cat-napping behind her.

"Lauren." Camila poked the girl's side. "Hey, Lauren wake up."

Lauren blinked, sitting up slowly and stretching. "Huh? What's going on? Where did Harry Potter go?"

Camila snorted. "He finished. And it was actually really cool... and eerily accurate. He gave me these to keep." She presented the deck of cards to Lauren with a childish smile. "Aren't they cool?"

"Sure are." Lauren yawned. "Now when we order Chinese food and the guy forgets to put in extra fortune cookies, Dinah can just eat one of those."

"So not funny." Camila swatted at her roommate with the bag, the cards creating a resounding thump against Lauren's cheek.

"Ow!"

"Oh my god I'm sorry." The brunette shuffled up on her knees, then pressed one hand over Lauren's cheek. "Are you okay?"

"No."

"Are you serious?"

"No."

"Lauren!" Camila laughed. "Come on, it's dark out now. We need to get home."

Lauren had to agree. She lifted herself up, gathering the used dishes and empty mugs and setting them down on one of the trolleys by the side of the room. Thanking the barista on the way out, the girls left the warmth of the café and began their brave, one block trek home.

Realizing she still hadn't had the conversation with Camila, Lauren began to get nervous. Time was running low, anxiety was running high, and she was running out of options. "Hey Cam—"

"So do you want to hear what he told me? I mean... considering you slept through it all." Lauren saw the brunette's eyes sparkle, and she sighed.

"Okay."

"So apparently I've got a whole lot of good luck coming my way. A lot of fortune, and turns for the better. Pivotal times in my life."

"Mmhm..."

I've got to do this now. Lauren told herself silently. I've got to stop her, turn her around and just tell her. Just tear off the Band-Aid... one fell swoop. Lauren watched Camila bounce ahead of her, rambling on about her psychic encounter. Come on Jauregui. Do it now.

"And apparently, the person I need to be looking for isn't afraid to tell me how they really feel. I guess that kind of makes sense, right?"

Now.

"Hey look! What is that?"

For fuck's sake.

Camila darted over to where a small box sat just at the foot of a streetlight, duct tape over the top, and small holes around the sides. Ignoring Lauren's warnings, the brunette knelt down and tore off the tape, folding the cardboard back and gasping.

"Are you okay?"

Lauren was by Camila's side in an instant, and she too was caught completely off guard by its contents. "Holy fuck."

Sitting in the box, shivering from head to toe and crying for its life, was a puppy. A puppy that someone had left on the street to freeze to death with nothing but some pathetic air holes, and a torn blanket to elongate survival. It was young, no larger than the size of the average cat. Lauren knew this kind of thing happened everywhere in the world, but she never expected to walk into it just like that. She shivered with anger at the sight of the crying canine, then shook it off to nudge Camila.

"We need to get it out of the cold." Lauren spoke the words on Camila's mind while the brunette nodded wordlessly, reaching down and scooping the animal into her arms. It struggled for a moment, but then realized that the inside of her jacket was plenty warm, then began snuggling deeper.

"How could someone just leave it here?" She asked, curling her arms up to her chest to encircle the animal against her body. "Of all the..."

"I think the reason why might be of less importance right now." Lauren replied as she took Camila's arm and began to lead her down the street. "We just need to get inside."

"Right." Camila nodded, quickening the pace as Lauren walked just in front of her to brace both bodies from the wind that proceeded to pick up around them.

When they arrived back at the house, Camila shrugged off her coat and used it to keep the dog bundled.

"Do you think it'd be best to run to a pet store right now? We can pick up some essentials." She asked nervously as she smoothed out the dog's back fur, using the friction, and her own body heat to keep it warm. In proper lighting, it was clear that the puppy was young, far too young to be left alone for very long. It was also had very distinct markings that lined up with a pure German shepherd. A marble blend of gold and black, two large brown eyes and ears that stood straight up were the ingredients to one cute-as-hell face.

It's almost ten o'clock." Lauren replied, grabbing an apple, as well as some baby carrots from the fridge. "None of the stores are going to be open anymore, so we're going to have to leave most of it for tomorrow. The main concern tonight is going to be keeping it warm and getting it water."

"Okay." Camila looked down lovingly. The puppy was rolling around in her lap, sneezing every once and a while from being too close to the fur on her parka. "Do you think we can keep her?"

"How do you know it's even a girl?" Lauren asked, making her way over with a bowl of sliced up apples and a few carrots. There was also an unopened jar of peanut butter under her arm, and a spoon wedged between her teeth.

"How do you think?" Camila asked, raising an eyebrow at the girl. Lauren made an "oh" sound, shaking her head to clear the stupidity.

"I don't think the landlords would be alright with pets." The green eyed girl then replied to the earlier question sadly. "I mean I have no reason to believe they would be."

Camila's face fell as Lauren offered the contents of the bowl to the dog. While the animal snacked happily, Lauren unscrewed the cap of the jar and dipped the spoon inside, popping it into her mouth.

"I thought that was going to be for the puppy?"

"What? I can't indulge once and a while? My mom had me eating brown rice sushi when I was home. Sushi was the one thing I had that I truly thought "healthy" wouldn't go fuck up."

Camila laughed. "Give it to me."

Lauren shrugged, handing the half-devoured spoon over and watching as the dog lapped it off in a matter of seconds.

"And now I need a new spoon." Lauren muttered as she dipped back into the kitchen. Ally made her appearance only moments later.

"Hey ladies, did you have a good... what the heck?" Ally stopped midway down the stairs. Her confused eyes immediately moved to the new addition. "So I drop you off to get a bite to eat, and you come back with a dog?"

"Someone left her to freeze to death on the street." Camila explained, petting the tiny animal as it ate. "We couldn't just leave her there."

"That's awful." Ally sat down on the arm of Camila's chair, watching the puppy carefully. "But you guys know that we probably can't keep her, right?"

"I know." Camila's demeanour began to droop again. "But I really don't want to bring her to the pound."

"Maybe we don't have to." Lauren mumbled through a mouthful of peanut butter as she re-emerged from the kitchen. "There might be someone I know who would be willing to take her. A family."

Camila raised an eyebrow. "Really? Who?"

"I'll tell you when I know more. I don't want to get your hopes up." Lauren looked down at the dog, then over to Camila's sad face. "I'm sorry babe, but it's for the best. You know that. I mean even if the landlord was alright with it, our schedules are so busy, and so varied that there would hardly ever be anyone home. She's young, so she needs a lot of company, and a lot of time for walks, and play, and all the other maintenance stuff that's going to come with it. It wouldn't be fair to us, or to the dog."

"I know." Camila watched as the puppy padded over to Ally's lap, sniffing around curiously. "I'm sorry, I'm just a hopeless animal lover."

"Don't be sorry." Ally smiled gently. "Look at this thing. She's adorable." The dog had climbed up onto Ally's lap, and was yearning to be scratched. Slowly but surely, it was gaining back its radiant personality.

"Where are the others?" Lauren asked as she seated herself in the living room recliner, pushing it all the way back and propping her feet up. "The house seems unnaturally... quiet tonight."

"Out." Ally shrugged. "If I had to guess I'd say midtown at one of those trashy bars, but they could really be anywhere. The good thing about those two is that they're like self-cleaning vacuums. They stick together, and if one needs something the other handles it."

"Most of the time." Camila muttered, flashing the eldest a grin.

"Right." Ally corrected herself. "Most of the time." She picked up the puppy, holding it up and scratching its big ears. "So I think it would be best if the little peanut here spent the night with Lauren. I don't want those two coming in and scaring it by wreaking their havoc."

"The peanut?" Camila questioned, brushing off her parka and draping it over the arm of her chair. "Is that some kind of American term of endearment I'm not familiar with?"

"I just saw that massive jar of peanut butter Lauren's got her face buried in." Ally shrugged. "And stop making it sound like you don't understand the American ways. I've seen you inhale a double bacon cheeseburger like it was air."

"Ith cute." Lauren mumbled. "And I've got a spathe heater down there, we can let her sthleep next to it."

"Lauren, swallow the peanut butter before you say words." Camila commanded, giving her roommate a look.

"Thorry."

"So it's settled." Ally chuckled, letting the dog down so it could run around the floor, sniffing every corner of the house. "The puppy is staying with Lauren, and I'm going to head up and shower. I've got to get up early tomorrow, have a good night ladies."

"Night." Both Latinas replied in unison.

When Ally disappeared, Camila stood up. "I should probably go as well. It's been a long day."

"Oh... okay." Lauren stammered, sincerely wishing she wouldn't.

Bidding Lauren a quick goodnight, Camila headed up the stairs and disappeared into her bedroom. As if often was when she just recently returned, the room was a disaster. Clothing was strewn across the floors, textbooks lay underneath her desk, and most of the extra baggage she had due to Christmas gifts still sat in opened suitcases. Camila sighed, closing her door and pushing a bunch of school supplies off her bed so she could collapse on the mattress, completely spent.

When the air became heavy, Camila grabbed the only jacket that sat in her room, pulled it on and opened her window. She had only done this once before when she needed a late night cramming break. The house was designed in a way that caused the garage roof to be perfectly level with Camila's bedroom window, which meant that at any time, she could simply step up onto her bookshelf, then out onto the shingles.

Granted the last time she had done this it was September, Camila let the cold hit her as she stepped out to the edge and sat down, extending her legs and lying back against the hard surface. It was only about ten minutes in when she heard a knock at her bedroom door.

***

"You should be more comfortable here than in that measly box." Lauren cooed to the puppy as she turned on the portable heater, and arranged a bundle of her softest shirts and sweaters into a nest on the floor. She patted the soft ground, waiting until the dog sniffed its way onto her clothes, spun around a few times, and then sat down. Whether it was the proximity to the heat, or the fact that it had been living in a cardboard box for god knows how long, she didn't know, but the dog was sound asleep before Lauren could even utter a word.

"Night buddy." Lauren smiled gently, admiring the soft, velvety feel of the puppy's ears. "I hope this is better for you, and if you happen to wake me up in the middle of the night, you're going to get a stern talking to."

Standing up, Lauren headed up the stairs before she had the chance to doubt herself, chicken out and change her mind. She ascended the second flight, stopped in front of Camila's room, and knocked softly.

"Camila?" When no response was heard, Lauren pushed the door open slowly to be met with an empty room. The light was on, and the window was cracked.

"Out here." A faint voice sounded from the roof, and Lauren frowned, pulling the glass back further to poke her head out.

"Camz, it's freezing. What are you doing?"

"I needed air."

"Oh." Lauren thought for a moment. "Do you think I could join you?"

"Please."

Lauren scooted downstairs quickly, grabbed her own jacket and headed back up, closing Camila's door softly and pulling herself out the window. "I didn't know you were a rooftop person." She commented as she sat down next to Camila, letting her legs unfold in a fashion similar to the brunette. The slant created a comfortable forty-five degree angle to lie on.

"I'm not really." Camila replied. Her eyes were up on the cloud covered sky. "I just didn't feel like giving sleep much of a chance." She moved her head to look at Lauren. "It's Tuesday, which means there's only one more day until classes start. Until all the stress comes back, and we have to start studying again..."

"Are you worried?"

Camila exhaled. "Exams didn't go very well last semester. I mean it wasn't terrible, but it wasn't my best. I don't know what happened, I guess I was just too distracted."

"I can't say that was completely your fault." Lauren admitted. "I mean you went through a lot last semester. You know that a lot of things happened that you really didn't see coming. That goes for both of us."

"I guess you're right." Camila sighed, sitting up. "Is the puppy okay on its own?"

"She's fine." Lauren smiled. "The poor thing is exhausted."

"Wouldn't you be?"

Lauren looked down. "I can relate."

Camila found herself subconsciously leaning against her roommate's body, head resting on her shoulder. "So what did you come out here for?"

"I still need to talk to you." Lauren replied. "And I want to do it before my ass freezes off."

Camila lifted her head, meeting Lauren's eyes with an intensity of her own. "Alright. What did you need to talk about?"

This was it. No interrupting Allys, no Harry Potters, no lost puppies. Just the two of them. Lauren took a deep breath. "You remember when we had that fight before we left for Christmas?" Lauren started, looking at Camila nervously. "And you went to Ariana's party? You were angry at me, and you had every right to be... but something happened, and I think you were pretty drunk, so you may not have remembered that—"

"You kissed me." Camila finished off Lauren's ramble, her eyes moving to focus on the distance before them. "The body shot, right?"

Lauren froze blinking like an idiot as she took in what just happened. "Um..." Lauren watched Camila turn slowly to look at her again, and for the first time in a long time, she felt vastly inferior to the brown haired girl. "H...how did you know?"

"You're such an idiot." Camila smiled softly, clearly enjoying how flustered Lauren was. "You're my best friend Lauren. I may have been ridiculously drunk, but do you really think I would mistake my best friend for some stranger? It wasn't hard to tell it was you. I know you." Camila then brought one hand up to her neck, and dragged her fingernails forcefully over the skin there to flake off a layer of old, cheap foundation. "I've also had to hide this thing from my mom all winter. It's almost gone now, but it's lasted for weeks. You really did a number."

Lauren's eyes met the deep purple that was just about faded away, and she blushed. Thankfully, it was so dark that there was no way Camila would have been able to see.

"Oh..." Lauren stammered. "Yeah, sorry about that."

"I know that this is what you've been trying to tell me all day." Camila continued. "I've been thinking about it as well. Actually, I've been thinking about it for the past few weeks."

"Are you mad?"

"Do I look mad?"

"I don't know." Lauren's nerves were through the roof, both metaphorically and literally. "Some people can be really calm when they're mad."

"I'm not mad. If I was feeling anything, it was complete relief that you were my first kiss, instead of some random stranger." Camila smiled again, a face that Lauren wouldn't ever be tired of seeing. "Apparently one of the side effects of me being angry is also being stupid. I don't know what I was thinking when I even considered letting someone take a body shot off me. That's got to be one of the trashiest things in the world." Camila hovered over her words for a moment, then looked over at Lauren again. "Actually, there's something I have to tell you as well."

"What's that?"

"Okay... Do you remember back when Hunter and the boys helped us out when that guy was trying to cover the sidewalk with your guts?" Camila asked, a humour filled twinkle in her eye. It had been long enough. They could laugh about it now.

Lauren involuntarily wrapped her arms around her torso, cringing at the memory. "Of course."

"And do you remember when I told you I was jealous because you were able to spark such seamless conversation with them?"

"Um... sure." Lauren could partially recall that chunk of the conversation.

"Well I thought about it more that night, and I came to the conclusion that... it wasn't the fact that you could so easily talk to the boys that made me jealous. It was the fact alone that you even talked to boys at all. They caught on that night. Matt assured me that they weren't trying to drive a wedge between us. He saw that jealousy right from the start."

Lauren crinkled her brow in confusion.

"I mean... I don't know what it is, but over the last little while, I've felt closer to you somehow. With everything you've done for me. The way you stand up for me, and you defend me, and you're always concerned for my well-being? I mean my life could be in a completely different place right now if you weren't in it. Everything would be so different if Darren went through with what his intentions had been that night. If Austin's vendetta had worked as planned."

"Don't think about that Camz." Lauren's voice came out robotic, and unnatural. There was still residual anger over the entire situation. "I don't want you to ever think about that. Ever."

Camila ignored her. "And how you were there for me at the hospital. How you made it so easy for me when that ridiculous thing just happened with my Mom last weekend... how you helped me talk through it just earlier today. You helped me realize things today that I never would have come to conclude on my own." Camila knew she was rambling, but she couldn't stop now. "I can't even begin to measure the impact you've had on my life, and we haven't even begun yet. Today when we were at Ally's clinic, I learnt firsthand that there are people out there who are struggling more than I am. There are people who are sad and hurting because they don't have that person in your life. They don't have a Lauren."

Camila took a deep breath, shivering on the exhale. "So that's why I'm not mad. I'm not mad that you kissed me... because I feel as if we can do that kind of thing, and it won't even come close to marring the relationship that we have."

If there was ever going to be a right time, this was it.

"Camila, stop." Lauren placed a hand on the girl's knee. "Let me talk now."

"Sure."

"I know that you've never... been in a relationship." She started, furiously battling the nerves in her stomach. "But I have. And you know I have."

"Yeah." Camila nodded. "I remember."

"Well I've done some thinking of my own, and I figured that back when I was in high school, I did love Luis. I mean I was truly, and honestly in love with him." She paused before continuing. "It may have just been a high school boyfriend, but we had a lot of good times together. Great times, and although we made some pretty bad choices, there are times that I know I wouldn't take back."

"Where are you going with this?" Camila asked, frowning.

"To a place you may or may not like." Lauren replied. "Anyway, over the past few months, I've come to realize that this isn't a game anymore. I'm not in high school, where the cool kids sit at one table, and the losers at another. Where all that matters is what you look like, and how much you can rebel against your parents. I'm an adult, and Normani, Dinah and Ally have all taught me that this isn't a fucking game. This is real. If I want something, I can't just sit around and wait for it to show up on a silver platter."

"What's real?" This seemed like it was going somewhere, but Camila hadn't a clue where.

"You may think this is the most ridiculous thing in the world, but everything changed that night that we went to Central Park. When that guy stopped us on the street, when I dropped that glass and you helped me clean it up. When you ran off, and I had to chase you. Everything changed, and it's been so different since then."

"Lauren..."

"There was a moment back then where everything clicked into place at once. Where you instantly meant the world to me. I fell in love with you that night Camila."

Both worlds stopped as Lauren spoke. While Camila's screeched to an abrupt stop and left her teetering on the edge, Lauren's decelerated until she too, was motionless.

"You... what?" Camila's head was spinning with something she couldn't quite place. Something new, almost thrilling.

"I fell in love with you." Lauren repeated. The words sounded so surreal when said out loud. "I fell in love with you, and I've been in love with you ever since." She refused to meet Camila's gaze as she felt it turn to her. "That's why I've been like this. Why I've been so distant and rude, but also fiercely defensive and reckless. That's why I was so weird with Ariana, I was scared."

"You love me? But how..."

"I fell in love with your story. The way you fought so hard when you were young, all for a family that just unraveled before you. The way you're so full of life, and so optimistic, and so dedicated to absolutely everything you do. You're loving, and compassionate, and hilarious, and talented. The way you see light in everyone, that's something I was never able to do, and I lived in a household where I took everything I had for granted."

Camila heard something in the way Lauren spoke. It was as if she wasn't talking to her, or trying woo her with gold plated words. She was trying to talk for her, as if she was explaining to someone else Camila's qualities. She wasn't trying to impress Camila, she was trying to impress the rest of the world.

And she wasn't about to stop there. Lauren had her chin resting on the tips of her knees now, and her eyes were closed. "I kissed you because I was afraid you were going to find someone else, and I would lose you. It was a bold move, and I know that technically, you were drunk... so I took advantage of you. I know I'm no better than some horny varsity boys, and for that I'm sorry. But... that was when I fell in love with everything else. Your smile, your laugh, your eyes... your lips. God... your lips."

"Lauren..." Camila could barely breathe.

"But I was so scared. I was terrified that I was going to screw up everything that we had. I almost did, because I failed to see the value in honesty. I'm a closed book Camz... you know that."

"Why were you scared?"

"Because everything with you is different." Lauren explained softly. "You're not Luis... you're something new. Something that I am very much not familiar with. I don't just want to make memories with you. I want to learn more about who you are. I want to run with you back into your past and help you figure everything out. I want to make your future a better fucking place, because of all the uncertainties that are out there, the one thing I can say without hesitation is that you deserve perfect."

"I don't..."

Lauren cut her off. "But I promise, that's not all. I want to make myself better, and make amends with all the mistakes I made. All the things I did back then that chipped away at the person I had never been. I don't think you quite understand the magnitude of which you've changed me, and you keep changing me. The me you know now isn't anything like the one from a few years ago. I don't even think you would have recognized her."

"Lauren, shut up for a second." Camila demanded, turning her body so she was facing her roommate head on.

"Sorry. I know I'm rambling."

"Kiss me."

Lauren stopped breathing. "What?"

"Kiss me. Now."

"Camila wait... I don't know if..."

Camila reached forward and cupped Lauren's jaw, forcing it up so their eyes met. "I have no fucking clue what love feels like Lauren. But I know that I want the same things you do." She nodded. "Remember when we went out for dinner, and I told you that all I wanted was to fall in love? I want you... I want this... and I know that I couldn't ever compete with the things you just told me, I need you to know right now that it was the most beautiful thing I've ever heard anyone say."

"Are... are you serious?"

Camila lifted her other freezing cold hand to place on the other side of Lauren's face, drawing her closer. "My best friend is in love with me." Camila whispered, tears forming at the corner of her eyes. "I've never had anyone in my life the way I have you... and I'm never going to. I want this so badly, I'm ready for love, and I'm so fucking ready for you."

The Ace of Cups is highly sought after, for it is a card that represents honesty, and free flowing emotion. The mermaid represents the prospect of a new world within the water, one in which you can gaze into the depths and discover new, and exciting things. Someone who is not afraid to tell you what they think, how they feel, or what you mean to them. Perhaps that is the person you should be looking for.

Her pulse thudded in her chest like a sledgehammer to a cracked window. Camila swiftly moved in and connected their lips, grabbing Lauren's bottom within her two and capturing it with a confidence that stemmed from raw thrill. Her hands moved to wrap around the girl's neck, and her weight forced Lauren back against the uneven rooftop. The wind whipped around them, and although the cold gnawed right through Camila's jacket, the burning touch, and faint taste of peanuts on Lauren's mouth washed away the discomfort.

Lauren was taken aback by Camila's sudden movement, but quickly found comfort in the way her friend's lips took her own, and the familiar fire that licked through her body. When she lay back against the roof, her arms traveled around Camila's frame to lock them together, and her heart found a steady beat as the girl's weight set perfectly against her. This was different from the party. There were no screaming teenagers, no drunk bystanders and horny guys. There was nothing but Lauren, Camila, and the melodies of the Big Apple behind them.

"I love you Camila." Lauren whispered as she felt the girl pull back and begin pressing a string of tender kisses to her bare neck. The snow whipped around her, freezing the spots and leaving ice cold patches of skin in their place. "So get it in your head right now, because I don't care where you are, or what anyone says. There's always going to be someone out there who loves you. Always."

Camila silenced her with her lips once more, before pulling away and placing her hands firmly against Lauren's breastbone for support. "I know that you've had enough uncertainty in your life over the past few months, so all I want to do now is take it all and turn it around." Camila rasped against the wind, leaning in and brushing her lips against Lauren's ear. "Lauren Jauregui... will you be my girlfriend?"

Lauren opened her eyes, turning slightly so their breath mingled again. The warmth was soothing, but quickly gone with the weather. It was something she had been waiting for forever, a dream that had finally become the most beautiful of realities.

"God yes." If Lauren's tear ducts weren't completely frozen to her face, she would spent the rest of the moment in tears. "Of course I will."

***

Returning inside, Lauren's hand hadn't left Camila's since they had got to their feet, and as they both re-entered the tiny bedroom, she turned to close and seal the window. She then took one look at the mess that was sprawled around the normally clean room, and frowned.

"You can't sleep in this disaster." She murmured, moving in and gripping the side of Camila's waist and pulling her gently so their bodies came in shivering contact. "We can clean it tomorrow, stay with me tonight."

"Is that alright?" Camila scanned the room. "I really need to get going on the whole... unpacking thing."

"Of course it's alright." Lauren laughed softly. "Come on, let's—"

She was cut off by the sound of the front door opening and closing, followed by a series of hushed whispers and the occasional audible giggle. "Shit" Lauren stepped over the pile of belongings on the floor to flick off the ceiling light, then moved back so she was grasping Camila's wrist and holding her still. "Don't make a sound."

"What...?" Camila whispered. "Why?"

"Do you really want to answer to a drunk Dinah right now?" The dark haired girl replied with a sly smile. "It's bad enough answering to sober Dinah."

Camila's eyes widened playfully. "You're right." She rested her chin on Lauren's shoulder, listening to the commotion just outside the door.

"Mani! Do you think everyone's asleep?" Dinah was talking quieter than normal, but even that voice was a long shot from actually being quiet.

"Their bedroom lights are all off you idiot." Normani's reply was just a little louder. "Wait, I can't find the light! Where's the light?"

"You don't need the light!"

"But I'll fall!"

"Then I'll catch you!"

Camila couldn't help but laugh, her entire body vibrating as Lauren held her. The green eyed girl brought one arm up to press against the back of Camila's neck, pulling her in and muffling the sound against her own hair. "Camila... quiet." She whispered with a smile.

"I'm trying..." Camila croaked, wrapping her arms around Lauren's waist and pulling herself closer. Something about the gesture felt so right. So natural and balanced. So perfect.

"Goodnight Maniii!"

"Goodnight Dinah!"

"Do you need to throw up?"

"No! Do you?"

"If I do I'll just wake up Ally!"

When their doors clicked closed, Lauren took Camila's hand and led her soundlessly out of the room, down the stairs and into the basement. The moment Lauren's door closed, Camila began giggling uncontrollably.

"My god this has been the most amazing day." She swooned. "I love my life right now." The brunette then knelt down next to the sleeping puppy, resting her chin on her hands and watching it roll around and sigh under the soft heat.

"That's what I like to hear." Lauren had exchanged her jeans and top for a pair of small shorts and tank top. She rifled through her own unpacked suitcase, tossing Camila a soft sweatshirt with a faded logo on the front. "That used to belong to my brother, so it's going to be way too big for you. It'll be warm though."

"Thanks." Camila pulled her shirt off and shrugged the sweater on, hugging it to her body. Straightening it out, she noticed that it slumped down one shoulder, revealing her collarbone. "This used to belong to your brother?" She questioned with a smirk, flexing her exposed shoulder.

"I may have made a few adjustments." Lauren laughed, holding her hand out and helping Camila to her feet. "It looks good on you. Why does everything I own have to look better on you than it does on me?"

"Stop." Camila leaned in and left a swift peck to Lauren's cheek. "You're beautiful. You know that."

Camila then disappeared into the washroom, leaving Lauren to float all the way to the bed, and collapse in exhaustion. Lauren checked the clock, noticing it was just after midnight. Their conversation had taken considerably longer than she had expected, but Lauren didn't regret it in the least. Everything she had been living through, all of the fears she had and the doubt she held was washed away in Camila's kisses. In her words, and her sincerity. Lauren curled into her pillow, unable to contain her smile.

When Camila reappeared, her hair had been tied up in a ponytail, and her jeans were ditched in a pile by the stairs. "Move over." She grinned, pulling the covers back and sliding underneath to press close to Lauren's back. The green eyed girl immediately turned around, still smiling into the darkness.

"Hi." Lauren whispered as she slid her right arm underneath Camila's head to cradle it, then draped her left over the brunette's slender waist. Camila's arms moved to loop around Lauren's hips; her fingers sliding underneath the fabric of her worn tank top to brush small circles in the bare skin.

"Hi." Camila replied sweetly. "You can't fall asleep yet, I want to make one more proposition."

"What's that?"

"Let me take you on a date tomorrow night, after we go and buy pet supplies." Camila declared softly. "I want to spend the night with you. Just us."

"Camila, I don't mind taking you-..."

"No." Camila interrupted her. "You've taken me to your favourite place in this city, and it was so beautiful. Now it's my turn. I want to take you to the place I love the most. Please?"

Lauren nodded. "I would love that." She grinned.

Camila breathed happily, then blinked a few times when she noticed her roommate's expression. Lauren was looking at her with a burning love that she hadn't ever seen before. Something full of affection; so much so that Camila had to physically remind herself to breathe. "Are— you okay?" Camila asked, her voice just a whisper. "Laur..."

Lauren just nodded slowly as she pulled Camila so close that she could feel the protruding ridges made by her ribcage. "I'm okay Camz." She let herself get lost in the scent of Camila's shampoo. "I'm so okay, you have no idea."

She then moved in and connected their lips, dancing into the touch in the slowest, most sensitive way possible. "Give me this shot Camila." She spoke as the other girl let her eyes drop closed. "I know I'm far from perfect, and you deserve perfect... but just give me one shot. I promise I'll do whatever I can to be perfect."

Camila nodded, letting her eyes just flutter open. No matter how dark it was, Lauren could see the light in Camila's eyes dance. The following words struck her hard.

"And I'll wait for the day when you realize you are perfect."

***

A/N: It took twelve chapters, but we finally got there. I hope our entry Camren was alright for you guys, it took some time to work through all that dialogue, but I think it turned out quite sweet, and as expected for such dynamic characters. I also hope that you caught on to the significance of all the events that occurred in this chapter; my goal with this story is to have each aspect, and each scene click together like a puzzle. It may not seem like it yet, but everything that you've seen until now will play a role in the end. As always, please leave me feedback and suggestions, and pardon any mistakes. This is a long chapter (actually the longest yet) and there are bound to be quite a few.

P.s: I'm realizing how easy it would be for this chapter to stand alone as a one-shot, and I can't tell whether that's good or bad.

Thanks,

~ Rory