Omniscient
[ thurs, nov 16th 6:13 PM ]
Aunt May's - Diner
Zorion sat by himself, restlessly rearranging the different condiments and salt and pepper packets that were in front of him.
He could hear the voices of Phoenyx and Demetrius a few tables away, but they were the least of his concern.
Ace had reached out to him earlier that day, informing him that Zolina was willing to sit down with him for a conversation.
So here he was; at a random diner of his sister's choice, waiting for her arrival. The only thing soothing him was the subtle scent of baked peach wafting in the air.
Every possible emotion was coursing through him. From happiness, to anxiety, to fear of rejection.
Just outside of Aunt May's, Zolina clung onto Ace's arm as though it were her life raft while they walked to the entrance.
Trinity and Miracle had offered to accompany her for moral support, but for this type of meeting, Zolina needed to feel safe with her boyfriend. He was her security blanket, her protector, her everything.
And she needed her brothers, too. The men that had welcomed her with open arms and filled a gap in her life.
"Twin." Demetrius gave her his classic diamond encrusted smile when he saw her, sliding out of the cushioned booth to give her a big hug. "Hey."
"Hey, Meech." She beamed over his shoulder when she saw that Prince Damani and Saint Dezmond were buckled into their car seats around the table. "Hi, my babies."
She grabbed their tiny hands, watching her now one-month-old godsons blow spit bubbles at her as Phoenyx stood up.
"Hi, Nyx." She leaned into him as he put an arm around her.
"Wussup, Sis?" He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her shoulder. "You good?"
Zolina gave him a weak shrug, watching as Ace and his friends held a silent conversation.
Demetrius cleared his throat after a while and gestured behind them, "He over there. At the far table on the right."
Ace turned his girlfriend's body to him and sighed, "You ready?"
He accepted a simple nod from her instead of his usual desired verbal response, taking her hand in his as they made the difficult and slow walk over.
Zorion's back was facing the door, so he didn't see the pair coming until they were standing beside his table.
Zolina locked eyes with who she now knew to be her brother. Having already met him, she felt like this moment would be a little bit easier, but the whole encounter made her feel sick to her stomach.
"Hi, Zolina." Zorion got up quickly to greet her. "Thank you for coming."
"Hi." She whispered.
Ace wanted to stay put for the entirety of the conversation that was about to take place, but he begrudgingly let go of Zolina's hand so that he could pull the chair out for her to sit.
He leaned down to whisper in her ear, "Imma be right over there, aight?"
"Okay." She turned her head to give him a kiss.
Zorion sat back down as he watched them, realizing that his distaste for his sister's boyfriend was misplaced.
It was apparent to him now, that all Ace wanted to do was keep Zolina out of harms way; which was a role that should also be his. He hoped that he got the opportunity to build that type of trust with his sister.
Ace retreated to the booth where his friends were, leaving the reunited siblings alone. The sounds of silverware and the smell of comfort foods floated in the room, creating space in between the heavy awkwardness.
"How have you been?" Zorion asked, picking up the laminated food menu. "Are you hungry? Can I order anything for you to eat? Drink?"
"No, thank you... Zorion, right?" Zolina looked at him, skeptically. "Not Orion?"
"Right. I, uh." Zorion put the menu down. "I usually just go by Orion."
A waitress came by with a cup of black coffee, and a bowl full of sugars and creamers for Zorion. She placed them down on the table before she went off to tend to the other diners.
Zolina crossed her arms defensively, "So was this your whole plan?"
"Plan?" He looked at her, perplexed. "What do you mean—"
"Constantly showing up at my gallery until you decided to drop this—" She put hand out. "—This bomb on me?"
"No." He picked up a stir stick for his coffee. "I mean, I didn't really have a plan. I just—"
"Decided to lie by omission." She stated, cutting him off again.
He chose not to argue with the statement, because her feelings towards him and how he approached the situation were completely valid.
Maybe he did go about things the wrong way, but he didn't exactly know what the 'right' way was.
He didn't know Zolina. Not this version.
"How'd you even find me?" She asked, hoping that he hadn't lied about that, too.
"The same way I told you." He sat up straight. "I was honest about that— about being a fan. I saw your art online, and then... I saw your name and picture."
When Zolina looked at Zorion, really looked at him, she saw a few similarities.
They shared the same skin tone, and both had heavy set eyes. It had gone unnoticed until now, but he too even had one shallow dimple in his left cheek.
"Ask me anything." He took a sip from his mug, watching her wandering eyes. "Whatever you wanna know."
She wanted to know everything. But where was she supposed to start?
"Your last name." She folded her hands and placed them on the table. "Is it Smith, too?"
"Taylor." He corrected. "We have different dads."
Her heart skipped a beat, "You know my dad?"
"Nah." He could see the hope drain out of her at his response. "But if it's any consolation, I don't know mine, either."
Oh, she thought to herself.
"Can I get anything else for you kids?" The same waitress approached again, taking a pen out from behind her ear. "More coffee for you, hon'?"
"We're good." Zorion told her. "Thank you, though."
Zolina watched the middle-aged woman head back to the kitchen, before she stole a glance behind her to make sure that Ace was still there.
He was. Holding baby Saint in his arms while his eyes were set on her.
"So, um." She faced her brother again, unsure of how to ask what she had been dying to know for the majority of her life. "What about..."
"...Mom?" He finished the question, seeing her nod and wrap her arms around herself.
Zorion didn't know where to start, or what Zolina wanted— or didn't want —to know. So, he just started talking and hoped that it made sense.
"She was young when she had me, so it was kinda like we grew up together. But I mostly remember being alone." He reminisced, unfiltered.
"She was the kinda person that hated staying in one place. And I guess, uh..." He cleared his throat. "I guess I was too much baggage for her to carry around all the time."
Zolina grew sullen listening to Zorion reflect on his past. She had painted this picture in her head that he was the one that was blessed with the better life, while she was served the shit end of the stick— not knowing how wrong she was.
"I was seven when I found out she was pregnant with you. I was so fucking excited 'cause she was finally home. Spending time with me."
The corners of his mouth twitched; like his brain was preventing him from smiling. Reminding him that these weren't memories to be happy about.
"A couple years after you were born, though, she started disappearing again. Travelling."
"What? She left you alone with me?" Zolina blinked slowly. "She left us alone?"
"I mean, she would send her friends to check in on us..."
Zorion spoke coolly, the child in him coming to his mother's defense, even when she didn't deserve it.
"Sometimes she would pop up randomly to pay some bills, make sure there was food in the crib. Leave a gift or two for a holiday or birthday that she missed."
Zolina scrunched her face up as a bitter taste filled her mouth.
When she came here tonight, she wasn't expecting to hear stories of a supermom, but she was unpleasantly surprised to hear the description of a deadbeat parent.
"Mom wasn't around for your first words, though. I was. Didn't see you take your first steps, I did." He put a hand to his chest. "I learned how to take care of myself, and then how to take care of you."
Being an older brother and also a father figure to his baby sister at such a young age, had robbed Zorion of the normalities of childhood.
He couldn't keep up with academics, or make consistent friends because of his repeated absences from school. Eventually, he just stopped going.
"It was hard. For sure." He saw the look of pity on her face, and also some guilt. "But it didn't matter, 'cause you were my best friend. Even though we're a whole eight years apart."
Zolina furiously blinked back tears before they could escape. She appreciated the sliver of positivity that he provided her with, but it wasn't sufficient.
"There's something I don't understand." She ran a hand through her braids repetitively, preparing herself for the next question that she had. "We didn't have a stable household, obviously. But I just... Ended up in the system one day?"
This was the part of the conversation that Zorion was dreading the most.
Even though it had been 18 years since the day that his life had changed forever, no amount of time could fully heal this wound.
"We both did, Zolina."
The revelation had caught Zolina off guard.
The smallest wave of comfort washed over her after learning that she wasn't the only one out of them to experience foster care, but it was more bitter than it was sweet.
She knew that it wasn't an easy life for any child to live.
"I still don't exactly know who called CPS on us." Zorion rubbed his chin in thought. "I just know we had a lot of nosey ass neighbours."
A 12-year-old Zorion became a professional at neglecting the knocks and doorbell rings from multiple social workers that stopped by his mother's home to conduct an inspection.
But what he should have been more aware of, was the undercover cop that was stationed at the end of their street.
All it took was one late night trip to the curb with the garbage, for him and his then four-year-old sister to be uprooted from their small sense of normalcy.
"I remember giving the caseworker all of mom's info." He said. "The whip she drove. The last phone number of hers I had memorized. Even the fucking picture of her I kept in my pocket. The lil' boy in me really thought she'd come pick us up one day."
But she never did.
"I guess she was just tired of being a mom."
Zorion had begged everyone who took on their case to keep them together; telling them that he was the only person who knew how to take care of his sister.
Unfortunately, nobody cared about the opinion of an abandoned child. And with their large age gap, there were some families that wanted Zolina, but not him.
It didn't matter how much he argued or resisted, the siblings were inevitably separated.
Why the fuck can't I remember any of this? Zolina thought to herself.
"Think I was about 15 when I stopped looking for her." He adjusted the toque on his head. "Stopped giving a fuck about her."
She could see the hatred in his eyes as he stared down at his now empty cup of coffee, but they lightened when he looked up at her.
"But I never stopped looking for you, ZoZo."
Zorion unthinkingly let his childhood nickname for her slip out of his mouth, making Zolina's body tense up.
ZoZo.
It was what an old coworker used to called her. Something that the kids at school used to tease her with because she loathed the nickname so much.
Besides it being an annoying rendition of her name, she never gave a deep thought as to why it made her skin crawl.
Why hearing it used to cause her anguish.
"I never stopped thinking about you, and if you were safe." He continued. "Hoping you were still drawing on walls with crayons somewhere. Wondering how the family you were with was treating you—"
"What was her name?" She tried to change the uncomfortable subject, not knowing it would only induce another. "Our mom."
"Zamirah. Zamirah Rhodes." He laughed weakly. "Our family must've had a thing for Z's—"
Zolina closed her eyes tightly, clutching onto the edge of the diner table to steady herself. She could feel the bile rising up in her throat. The word 'family' making her sick to her stomach.
"Whoa, whoa. You okay?" Zorion asked, worry taking over him. "You want some water or something?"
"No. Um." She took a few deep breaths. "I mean, yes. I-I'm fine."
He didn't believe her, "Zolina—"
"I'm sorry." She abruptly pushed her chair out and stood up. "I, uh. I can't do this."
"Wait, wait. Please." He also got up, not wanting their conversation to end on a bad note. "I didn't mean to overwhelm you—"
"It's not your fault." She put a hand up to stop him from inching closer to her. "None of this is your fault. I'm sorry. I think I just need... Some more time."
"Yeah. Yeah, okay. I understand." He slowly sat back down, not wanting to overstep. "Um, just reach out whenever you're ready to talk again. Take as long as you need, alright?"
She nodded quickly and turned to walk away, seeing that Ace was already up and hastily moving towards her before she could even reach his booth.
"Hey." He said gently, cradling her face between his fingers. "Wussup?"
"Can we leave?" She muttered, avoiding his eyes.
"What happened?" He inquired.
"I just wanna get out of here." She urged, not wanting to go into details.
Ace could feel the stress radiating off of her. He clenched his jaw and sent a glowering stare in Zorion's direction.
"Meech." He called out to his friend, letting go of Zolina to dip in his pocket and grab his car keys. "Take Z to my—"
"No, Grayson. I need you." She insisted, clinging to his wrists. "Zorion didn't do anything, okay? Can we just go? Please?"
"Yeah." His face softened at her tone. "Aight, Mama."
Ace rushed Zolina out of the diner, barely sparing his friends a goodbye and leaving them puzzled.
Zorion was headed to the exit moments later, his head hung low.
Phoenyx was in the middle of feeding Saint Dezmond his bottle, so Demetrius gently unclenched Prince Damani's strong fist from one of his locs and got up instead.
"Ay, hol' up, bruh." Demetrius grabbed Zorion's shoulder before he could go anywhere. "What happened? What you say to her?"
Zorion sighed, feeling disheartened as he stole a glance at the twin infants in their car seats. Two joyous and carefree siblings.
"Too much, I guess."
👻
- the siblings have a sit down
- Zo learns details about her childhood and her mother, Zamirah
- thoughts?
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