A few days later...
There's an unknown car outside of my apartment. It is too fancy to be the Uber I've requested. The person in the steps outside and he approaches me.
"Ma'am please do not be alarmed." His accent is funny and I can't figure out where it is from.
"Why would I be alarmed?" I ask him.
"He said you might be..." He shows me a tablet with Keletso's picture on it. I bite my lip to hide my smile.
"He sent you." I clear my throat.
"Yes, he sent me to fetch you." He tells me.
He opens the door and motions with his hand for me to get in. I walk towards the car but I immediately stop and stare at the back seats.
"Call him first." I'm feeling a bit anxious.
He doesn't even hesitate and I relax a bit. Keletso answers immediately and I snatch the phone from the driver.
"It's you, right." There's an evident panic in my voice.
"Yes it's me. But if you're not comfortable with him, you can do whatever you want." Keletso says.
"It's fine. He's fine." I give the man a curt smile.
"Africa..."
"Yes?"
"I don't like that you're afraid of me." I notice the discomfort in his tone.
"I'm fine." I assure him but the pitch of my voice is clearly off-key.
"Anxious people who are not fine say that all the time." He tells me.
"It's only because he's a stranger, but I'm fine now." I quickly end the call before letting out a heavy breath.
My hands are trembling when I return the phone back to the driver. He notices.
"Miss are you alright?" He seems genuinely concerned.
"I'm okay." The words come out as a heavy and sharp breath.
"Miss... Breathe. You're having a panic attack." He informs me.
"I'm well aware, thanks." Speaking is becoming more of a defect for me as I take in heavy breaths.
"In..." He instructs and I obey. "Out..."
"That's it focus on my voice." He says.
I look into his eyes and that's when I realise that he has albinism, when all this time I thought he was white.
I burst out laughing.
In the car...
"What was so funny?" He looks at me through the review mirror and I look at his eyes again.
I smile at him. It's a full smile.
"I thought you were white." I stifle a laugh but I just end up snorting.
"Why is that so funny?" He seems confused.
"I'm laughing at myself." I say.
"It is often said that those who are able to laugh at themselves are most happy." He tells me.
I wish...
I wish I could remember the last time I was happy.
"Where are you from anyway?" I ask him.
"I'm from Ghana but my mother is from Spain." He says. His words carry a sense of pride and joy.
"That's nice," I say and I look outside the window.
"We're here." He informs me.
I take a deep breath.
When I step outside of the car, there's a warden standing outside. He smiles as soon as he sees me. It's the smile of a man who has just won the lottery.
"You must be her."
I'm not sure if it's a question or a statement.
"I must be who?"
"Shut up and follow me," he says.
"What is going on. I'm supposed..." He turns around to shush me.
I follow him silently as he leads me into the prison. Our destination is a room. I don't know how to describe the room. It's a bit dull except for the orange that offers life and colour. I lurch myself at him and he welcomes the embrace. The only problem is the barrier between us.
"It's getting bigger each day." His eyes look at me with so much admiration before all of his attention is stolen by my belly.
He kneels down and places his ear on my belly.
I just roll my eyes.
The warden clears his throat.
"Our business is done." Keletso's reply is absent minded.
"For now," the warden says before closing the door.
"Is he going to say?" My irritation is apparent but I doubt that he is aware.
"I made it worth his while, so no." He tells me.
"How long do we have?"
"Three hours."
"Then we better get to it."
He turns to look up at me.
"I was hoping we could talk." He doesn't sound as confident as his usual self.
"Stand up." It is more of a demand than a request.
He does as I say.
I grab him by the collar and shove until the wall stops us both.
"I don't want to talk. Okay?!"
He nods abruptly.
"I don't want you to make love to me. I want you to make me forget. Okay?!"
He continues to nod. I think I'm scaring him but I don't care.
"You got it?"
He breathes out sharply and I am sure of his consent.
"We are going to talk right?" His voice is thick.
I kiss him violently and it takes him a second to catch up and keep up. I break the kiss and drag him to the bed.
"It depends on how you perform." I give him a wicked smile.
We struggle to get into a comfortable position because of the belly but we soon get the hang of it. At the end of I'm frustrated and annoyed. We have certainly had bad moments before but this was the worst of them all.
**
"That was amazing," he says.
I've placed my head on his arm and I'm facing away from him to hide my teary face. His arm as pillow is certainly not comfortable but I don't mind. I can feel his heat on back and for some reason, I feel comforted.
"It's certainly not that much enjoyable with the belly."
"I didn't mind it."
I feel his hand on my cheek.
"Of course you didn't mind it." I sniffle.
"Sphe gave birth a day ago." He informs me.
It is a struggle for me to turn my entire body so that I face him. When I finally turn, he shamelessly laughs at me.
"How do you know that?"
"I've been keeping an eye on her , and before you get worked up, I did it for your own good." He explains.
With much difficulty I turn away from him and resume my previous sleeping position.
"How so?" I'm trying by all means to remain calm.
"I don't want you to worry. So I'm trying to eradicate most of the things that might get you worked up. It's not good for the babies."
I roll my eyes when he mentions the babies.
"Is she okay? We're not talking." I add on.
"She is, her and the baby." He informs me.
"Since you're on a vigillante mission to eradicate my worriors, what will you do about Sandile." I had thought he would tense up , upon hearing Sandile's name but as it turns out I thought wrong.
"Given your full permission I would gladly eradicate him but knowing that it would hurt you, I don't think it's a good idea."
"My feelings are one of the many things I'm no longer sure of. I feel nothing. I'm empty." I confess in all honesty to myself.
"Do you like the orange colour?" He asks me out of the blue.
"Yes I do."
"You're teasing me." He giggles and it's a weird sound. It always sounds weird when he giggles. It is not a sound he makes very often but it's good to hear.
"I like it better off you, actually." I smirk even though I know he can't see me.
"You better stop because I still have stamina." He threatens me.
"I certainly do not." I rub my belly absent mindedly. I feel his hand over mine and we both move over the belly.
"Since you haven't been going to work," he begins and I make sure to listen attentively. "There's some money, in a trust. I've already spoken to my sister and she will give it you. For you and the babies."
"You've been stalking me!" I push his hand away with the back of mine and I lift myself from the bed with little effort.
"I have been keeping an eye on you." He tries to reason but I'm already fuming.
"It's the same thing!" I shout.
"Just as it's the same thing when you're okay with me being a criminal when it suits you!"
"What?!"
"This. How do you think you got your fix so soon?!"
I feel my hands trembling so I try to remain calm.
"I handed myself in because if this went to trial, you would've died before you could even state your case before the magistrate. I tried by all means to implicate only myself so that they won't come after you. But one can never be too sure. I have to make sure that you and all of your relations are safe even if you hate me for it." He groans out of frustration.
"I quit my job because of conflict of interests. But in all honesty, I quit for selfish reasons. I don't know why you it's so easy to confess to him.
"I'm so stupid. I could've gotten my father or sister killed. You should've just taken me." I sit on the bed, having my back towards him I bury my face in my hands.
"It's all right. This is my fault. You were the perfect target. A student, in debt and desperate. You were an easy catch. Too easy indeed, I should've known that you were my punishment." He tells me.
"And you, mine." I turn to look at him and I'm disappointed to find him looking away.
"Does your sister know?" The question just pops into my head. A judgemental question.
"Yes and she hates me for it but she doesn't know she's the reason I got into it in the first place." His tone tells me that he doesn't want to discuss the matter any further.
"You said you wanted to talk. So talk."