It was almost 12 in the noon when Ricky walked out of Taerae's house. Since they stayed up almost until dawn, he didn't wake the elder up from the kinda deep sleep he was in. Ricky remembered the conversation from the previous night. He felt quite bad for his friend. But anyway, Taerae would probably have to live through it, so all he could do was to support him anytime.
Ricky realized he had a blunt headache as he blacked out for a second when he got in the car. However, taking a few sips of water and shaking his head, he started driving. The ride to his house wasn't long. So soon, he parked his car and unlocked the door. In the back of his head, he expected what he saw, yet, it shocked him.
In a very good way.
Cause on his couch, holding a few roses was Kim Gyuvin, sleeping with a frown.
Ricky immediately took out his phone, and realized he hadn't turned it on.
'So that's why he came straight to my house.'
Ricky smiled. Gyuvin must have managed a ride to his house in the morning, he even thought about bringing roses- was he there to apologize? And, he was sleeping. So he also stayed up late in the night. Was he worrying that much?
Ricky didn't want to wake him up, but the sound of his footsteps in the previously calm house woke the younger up anyway. He did a little take of where he was; as soon as he saw Ricky, he jumped up on his feet.
"Ricky! I'm sorry!" He quickly wiped the corner of his lips and showed the roses. His voice was groggy and strained, "Please, forgive me. I hurt you and was wrong and-"
Ricky raised his hands, saying, "Take a breath, I'm not going anywhere. Speak slowly."
"Alright." Gyuvin huffed and cleared his throat. He also took a few steps to stand face to face with his boyfriend, "I'm so sorry, babe. I shouldn't have reacted that way, and I... I should have listened to you, cared for your feelings."
"You said I was acting like a child." Ricky pointed out, "That it's not a big deal, that I didn't trust you enough."
"I know, Gyuvin looked regretful, "I've... Done a terrible thing. I couldn't control it and took my frustration out on you. I realized minutes later, after I thought it through. But when I went back, you were gone. And I looked for you, called you. But you turned your phone off, so I.. I had to wait till morning to find a bus, I was so worried."
Ricky sighed. It didn't make sense, how fast his mind was healing. The words from last night that stabbed him deep started feeling more blunt with every word of Gyuvin during that time, and it was alarming, how huge an effect his lover had on him.
Gosh, Ricky for sure was a softie.
However, he tried one last time, "You hurt me at my weakest spot, Gyu. I shouldn't forgive you so easily."
"Right, you shouldn't!" Gyuvin immediately agreed, "So I've prepared myself. I- I'd do anything you want! Like anything."
"Anything?" Ricky raised one brow.
"Yes, anything you want that is humanely possible for me."
"Then... How about no touching me for a year?"
"Cool." Gyuvin sounded determined, which shocked the other.
"Really? You'll be okay not doing that for an entire year?"
"If it means you'll forgive me and trust me again, then yes." Gyuvin said, "I can wait. For as long as you need."
And that was it. Maybe Ricky was too weak to keep up with his resolution. But it was Gyuvin, his lover, his weakness, and the man who said all these nice things, so he had to accept the apology. Therefore, he took Gyuvin's hand, "Come with me then." He took the man all the way to his bedroom.
He kept thinking about what Taerae had said to him. That he should be honest with his lover. Even though it was so difficult to get out of that phase, that dark, horrible, humiliating phase- Gyuvin wasn't like that. He was definitely genuine, sincere. Yes, he made a mistake, but he admitted and apologized. Doesn't this already make him a better man? A man Ricky should be happy knowing, or better, loving?
And if, after everything, he turned out to be the same, maybe it would be the end for Ricky- to believe in anyone. That was a huge risk. But being as emotional as he was, he decided to risk it.
(A/N-Okay, there's like a few paragraphs of mature 🔞 content, I'll indicate where it ends, so if you wanna skip it, go straight to that note and read the rest of it cause it connects to the storyline)
So he made Gyuvin stand facing the bed, while going to grab a few stuffs from his locker. The younger's eyes widened as he saw his man sit on the edge of the bed, ready to take off his pants.
"Uh- Ricky? What-"
"Ssh, I'm gonna show you something." Said the Chinese male, undressing his bottom half. Bewildered, Gyuvin saw Ricky uncap the tube of lubricant, and cover the medium sized dildo he grabbed earlier with it. The younger couldn't say anything- cause it was just- confusing, and new, and so messed up. Like- why was Ricky fingering himself and then-
He pushed the head of the dildo inside his hole, scrunching his face as he adjusted to the size. So was he.. already used it it? Wasn't he a virgin? Or did he gather experience by playing with himself?
Standing there, Gyuvin could only feel his own erection as he watched Ricky fuck his own hole with the dildo. And he was making that face, uttering those pain and pleasure filled noises, like groans and moans and whispers and curse words. Gyuvin could swear, had he not messed up last night, he'd jump on his man and replace that fucking dildo with his own member.
Just when Gyuvin thought to fuck it and actually do it, he saw Ricky cum all over his stomach.
And it literally played with his sanity. Shim Ricky fucking came right in front of his eyes! So hot! That was so damn sexy!
(A/N- End of mature 🔞 stuff)
Panting, Ricky asked, "See?"
"Yeah..." Gyuvin spoke, spellbound.
"Not even a minute." Ricky took the dildo out and threw it on the ground in frustration. The 'thud' sound of it hitting the ground brought the younger out of his wet, dreamy trench.
"Huh- what?" Gyuvin sounded concerned. Ricky buried his face in his knees, being naked down his waist.
"I have this- condition where I can't hold myself longer than a minute when someone's inside me." Ricky said, "It's so embarrassing. I know I should have told you earlier, but-"
"So?" Gyuvin asked, totally shocked, "How is this- no, Ricky. This is not embarrassing!" He sat next to his man, then held him by the shoulder, "If anything, I found you so hot! Like if I were doing that to you, making you cum so fast, I'd feel really proud of myself."
"Stop bluffing." Ricky started sniffing, "I know it's humiliating. They made fun of me for this. I want to get better, but no matter how many times I try, it just- doesn't work."
There were so many things to process, so Gyuvin took his time interpreting each of those words. A huge question arrived soon, and he asked, "You got made fun of because of this? Who the fuck dared to do that?"
"My... Ex boyfriend."
"What??" Now Gyuvin was totally out of his wits. "You- you had a-"
"Back in China." Ricky lifted his head up, he had stained his cheeks with tears, "We dated for a few weeks."
Gyuvin felt a burning sense of jealousy inside of him. But first, he needed answers. So he grabbed that shoulder tight, saying, "Ricky, please tell me what happened. What did he do?"
The older male sighed. He figured there was no going back, so he started, "Like I said, there was this guy from my college whom I liked. And we started talking, and soon, got into a relationship. He was really good with me. But weeks later, when we first had sex and I came so fast- he..." Ricky closed his eyes, "He laughed at me."
Gyuvin fisted his free hand, more blood rushing to the vein on his forehead.
"I was embarrassed and asked him to stop. He did. For that night. But then he..." Ricky closed his eyes again, saying it in words was so hard, "-told his friends about it."
"What the fuck!?" Gyuvin was full on fuming. However, that wasn't the worst part, and Ricky started shaking. So the younger hugged him, even though his head was ablaze with wrath. He calmed Ricky enough to continue. Sniffing from time to time, he said, "Then he invited me to his house one night. And I went there and .. all of his friends were there and-"
Ricky broke into a sob. Gyuvin embraced him immediately.
"They tied my h-hands and.. l-legs.."
"Ssh, it's okay, baby. It's okay. You don't have to say anything. I get it." Gyuvin didn't know what he felt more. The pain or the rage or the regret of failing to protect the guy or the guilty feeling for not even trying to know about the mountainous burden, the unexplainable trauma his very own lover had been bearing. He just knew he needed to hug that boy. To love him. To make him feel safe.
"... And I ... Gyuvin I..." Ricky kept sobbing, "They filmed it and... The whole college.."
"Baby, please. Don't think about those. It's all over. You're with me. And I love you so much! You're safe now."
"My dad... He used his power to .. but I couldn't s-stay there... And I shifted college and... I haven't b-been able to trust anyone, I'm s-sorry, G-Gyu."
"No, I am sorry, babe. I should be. How could I... Oh God!" Gyuvin felt his own wet cheeks. "I promise, if I ever find any of them, I'll kill them with my bare hands." His voice was shaking. Ricky looked up at that, seeing the younger cry broke his heart. So he quickly brought his hands and wiped those cheeks, "Why are you crying, Gyu? Don't cry. It's all over."
"I'm so sorry, babe. I'm so so sorry." Gyuvin buried his face in Ricky's chest. The latter patted his head, trying to calm himself as well as the other.
"It's okay, dad already made them pay. It's just... The whole thing still hurts like- it was a... How to say, horrible? I don't think.. that's enough to describe how I felt back then." Ricky said, slowly. With every pause, trying to breathe normally.
"I wish I could save you from even meeting those filths." Gyuvin caressed his cheeks, "It must have been hellish."
Ricky sighed, "I didn't think I'd be able to get into a relationship again, but... I found you, and I always felt so safe around you. So after talking and getting to know you, I kinda..."
Gyuvin felt guilty all over again. Ricky trusted him after all those, but what did he do? The change of his expression was detectable, so the elder immediately said, "I know you're thinking about last night, but part of it's my fault too. I should have been honest with you from the very beginning."
Gyuvin stared at Ricky's eyes. Even after everything, he was thinking about Gyuvin's feelings. The thing itself shows just how precious he is. So the younger cupped his face, "I promise, I'll never hurt you. It's never gonna repeat, I'm gonna make up for what I did and... I love you." He looked at one of those gorgeous eyes to another, "I love you with all your flaws and imperfections. Know that all of those make you unique and I love all of that."
Ricky sighed in contentment. Hearing Gyuvin say it felt nice. Very nice. Yet he stopped the other from saying anything else, by placing his lips on top of Gyuvin's ones. Who else would love him like that?
Gyuvin grabbed his frame and deepened the kiss. He let his guilty feelings get replaced with a vow to protecting the older male. With everything he had. And the kiss was a promise that sealed it. Once they parted, with a smile, he asked, looking below, "Now that we're both messy, care to take a shower?"
For the first time, no insecurity kicked inside Ricky, who answered with a grin, almost getting on his lover's lap, "Why not?"
And Gyuvin carried the half naked man towards the tub the next minute.
-
You know the drill, a continuation or should we move on to Haobin?
Anyway, I felt bad writing the part about Ricky's sufferings :'((
Also, early update cause I already finished writing it (I'm fast!) and tomorrow I'll be occupied for the whole day ://
Hope you're liking it so far❣️