「 eighteen ✧ body shots 」
Oh, fucking hell.
Emilia had about fallen off the surfboard and into the water 20 times by now, and I would never get over how she looked every time she emerged from the ocean.
Her dark hair was dripping wet, framing her smiling face, and I wanted to trace the path of every droplet of ocean water down her body with my tongue. Her swimsuit clung impossibly tighter to her figure, and it took everything inside of me to not get on my knees in front of her, then and there.
But it was the fact that she allowed herself this close to the water that made me admire her further. Despite everything she had been through, she still chose to face her fears and showed no sign of being afraid when she fell into the water.
"Are we seriously going to try this again?" she chuckled, approaching the surfboard.
I gave her my best grin. "Only if you want."
She sighed, still smiling, and used her arms to lift herself onto the board. I grabbed her waist to assist her, and it took every ounce of restraint to keep my hands from traveling elsewhere.
She finally got onto the board, lying on her stomach. She slowly raised onto her hands and knees while I held the board steady.
"Is this good?" she asked, glancing down at me with her bottom lip trapped between her teeth.
"It's good. Do you want to try paddling again, or do you want to stand?"
Her expression turned determined – something I looked forward to seeing everyday back when we were in Harvard. "I'm going to stand."
I raised my brows. "And you're confident in that?"
She gave me a pointed look. "You aren't?"
I raised my hands in mock surrender. "Of course. You can do anything."
"I know." She slowly put one foot on her board and steadied herself before transferring her other foot until she was basically squatting. Then, miraculously, she put her hands out to balance herself and stood on the board, the astounded look on her face mirroring mine.
"Should I let go?" I asked, motioning with my head to where my hands gripped the board to prevent her from falling off.
"Go ahead. I can balance," she said, her nose pointed in the air with a confident demeanor.
"Whatever you say," I muttered, then slowly let go. The board wobbled, but I'll give her credit. She stayed on for about five seconds before a wave came and knocked her over.
Somehow, we had gotten further into the water than I'd wanted. The wave only pulled us further out, and the water was almost up to my head. When she fell on top of me, I tried to catch her, but she slipped from my reach and further out to sea.
I came up for air, expecting to see her head pop up near mine. I waited. And waited. And waited.
Goddammit Emilia, where are you?
My anxiousness was eating me from the inside. I dove underneath the water, ignoring the sting in my eyes as I searched for her underneath the water.
I saw a blur further out, a blur that was barely moving.
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Please be alive, Emilia.
I swam to her as fast as I could. Her eyes were wide, unseeing, as if she were in a trance. But as soon as I grabbed onto her, she blinked and shuddered, and panic found its way into her gaze.
I placed my hands under her arms and kicked her to the top. She gasped for air as soon as we emerged, and a weight fell off my chest.
She's alive. She's breathing.
"Let's get you to the board," I muttered, swimming with her in my arms until I could reach the board and pull it toward her. She grabbed onto it, still breathing in air greedily.
"Are you alright?" I asked.
She shook her head slowly. "I'm... okay."
She was lying. "Do you need to talk about it?"
"It's fine, really." She looked everywhere except for me, and I hated it. I hated not seeing her face, not seeing her eyes on mine, even if they were full of hatred. "And... I'm sorry."
"There's nothing to be sorry for," I argued.
"I keep doing this. I wish..." She looked down. "I wish I wasn't such a fucking coward. I wish I could just face my fears."
"Hey, don't say that. You were facing your fears when you chose to get into the water." I smiled. "Just because you had trouble just now doesn't mean you're a coward. The fact that you were even in the water shows that you're brave."
"Thank you," she whispered.
"I think this is enough surfboarding for today, don't you think?"
A small, sad smile lifted her lips into the familiar curve I wanted to memorize. "Yeah."
I started dragging the board closer to shore with her in its wake. But when she started coughing behind me, I couldn't take it.
The water was to our waists, so I tugged the board away from her and held her face in my hands. "Talk to me. What happened out there?"
Her expression slowly morphed into sadness. "I had a bad memory."
"A bad memory? Does it have to do with the water?"
She hesitated before nodding. When she didn't continue, I knew she didn't want to continue to talk about it, and I didn't want to force her.
So I just leaned down until we were eye level before saying, "I'm here if you need me, okay? Just shout my name if you need to talk."
"Thank you," she said. When I didn't move my hands, she cleared her throat and stepped back from my touch. I let my arms fall to my side as she looked around. "Where are the others?"
I glanced over at the beach. "I think they went shopping. I saw them leave about an hour ago."
"An hour?" She raised her brows. "What time is it?"
I glanced at my watch. "Almost 5."
"Already?" She looked around. "What are they shopping for?"
I shrugged, then continued walking to shore. "Who knows. Callum is probably on the hunt for tequila."
"Why tequila?"
I couldn't hide my smile. "He said something about body shots earlier."
"Oh god," she muttered. We finally got out of the water and she made a beeline to her chair and wrapped a towel around her. I followed her and placed the surfboard next to the others.
"Should we go meet them?" she asked.
"Why not?" I threw on a shirt and followed her to the deck that led to a strip of local shops.
It wasn't hard to find them. We followed the sound of a guy (Callum) yelling in celebration and three other people's shouts with him at the liquor shop.
"Well, hello there," Callum said as soon as he laid eyes on Emilia. He scanned her up and down, hesitating ever so slightly on her face, and something about it irked me.
She smiled at him and joined the girls, where they presumably went to shop some more. I let my eyes linger on Emilia's retreating figure before dragging my eyes back to see Callum and Rohan in front of me.
"You guys were surfing for a while," Rohan said as Callum led us to another store.
"She was determined to stand on the board," I chuckled.
"And did she?"
"Of course."
I didn't miss the small smile that lit his face before Callum interrupted us. "I'm going to pop in here and grab a couple of glasses. Do you think you could stop at the grocery store a block down and grab some limes?"
"So, you were serious about the body shots?"
His smirk was slow. "Of course I was."
I rolled my eyes and turned around with Rohan to go grab the limes.
"How long have you guys been out here?"
"A while, unfortunately. Even though Callum's ID was real, the seller didn't believe him, and they had a whole thing. Right before you arrived, the clerk finally caved and let him have the tequila."
"I figured. We heard the cheers."
"We?" Rohan rose a skeptical brow.
I shrugged. "Emilia and I."
He was quiet for a moment. "You like her, don't you?"
"What?" I scoffed. "No. What makes you think that?"
Liar. Liar, liar, liar.
And he knew it, but he still raised his hands in mock surrender. "My bad."
I bit the inside of my cheek. "Anyway, we would never work. We're polar opposites. She's so..." I shook my head, at a loss for words. "And I'm just..."
"Right," Rohan said, and something in his tone made me think that he was doing anything but agreeing with me.
"I'm serious." We finally made it to the store Callum had mentioned, and I opened the door, allowing Rohan in first. He held it open for me behind him, and I followed him inside.
"Whatever you say," he said, leading us to the fruit aisle where we grabbed some limes.
We were quiet in the checkout line. I was afraid to talk, afraid that I'd reveal too much.
Afraid that I might accidentally talk about how much I did like her.
✦✧✦✧
The sun was setting by the time we all gathered up at the beach again. We had moved closer to the rocks and were now in a secluded area, hidden from the public by the stones that towered above us.
Callum had also, somehow, snagged some wood and lighter fluid along with some matches to start a fire. The girls were on the way back, according to Rohan.
I was sitting by the fire when I heard her laugh. And god, I could have recognized it anywhere.
I stood and glanced over at-
Oh. Oh, god.
My eyes fell on her, and time stopped.
She was in a bikini. It was colorful, coral with geometric accents that were purple and orange and white. The top was shaped as triangles that had one set of strings wrapped around her neck and the other behind her back. The bottoms followed the same pattern, with drawstrings tying it together on her hips.
But the best part was the white, open, thin coverup that flowed behind her as she walked toward us.
She looked like a dream.
And when her eyes finally met mine...
"Hello," Callum said, grinning. "I hope you lot had fun."
"Plenty," Lacey said, sitting next to Rohan.
"Well, buckle up for some more." Callum's smile was filled with deviltry as he motioned toward a flat rock that was up to about our waistline.
"What's that for?" Lacey asked excitedly.
Callum held up his bottle of tequila, a lime, and a handful of sand.
"Body shots?" Aurora exclaimed.
But my eyes fell onto Emilia. She looked unfazed – just continued tightening the coverup around her.
Right. Her scars.
Lacey and Aurora had probably convinced her to buy that bikini, and she must have hesitated but didn't want to give them a hard time, so said yes, but bought the coverup for comfort.
"Do you want to start?" Callum asked, his eyes turned to Emilia.
What?
"Why not?" Emilia stood and climbed onto the rock, lying flat on her back.
Callum smiled, then opened the bottle and poured some tequila onto her stomach and in her belly button. He sprinkled sand up her stomach and to her chest, then put a lime in her mouth.
I was shaking with anger.
Then he put his mouth – his fucking mouth – on her, and I about lost it.
But of course, Rohan sensed it and placed a hand on my shoulder, keeping me from standing up.
"Stop," he whispered. "You can go next. There's no reason to lose your head over it."
"But he-"
"Callum doesn't know," Rohan said. "He doesn't know how much his actions toward her are affecting you. He's doing all of this for fun. He doesn't like her, and she doesn't like him. Look at her. She's laughing."
But I already had been looking at her. I'd been staring. And what bothered me the most was that he was the one making her smile like that.
I wanted it to be me.
I wanted her smile, her every laugh, to be reserved for me.
Callum finally finished, after what felt like forever.
"Who wants to go next?" He raised the tequila over his head, but before anyone could say anything, I walked up to him.
"I will."
"And who's the lucky girl?"
I looked down at Emilia. "Stay where you are," I told her, allowing a slow smile to lift my lips.
There was something in her eyes when she looked at me. Something I couldn't quite place, but I knew I wore the same expression on my face, as well.
I grabbed the bottle from Callum's hand, and as soon as he left my vision, I forgot everyone else.
It was just me and her.
I poured the tequila on her belly button and trailed some around it too. I sprinkled salt up her chest, toward her mouth.
"Open up," I said, smirking, holding the lime above her mouth.
She rolled her eyes but obliged and I placed the fruit between her lips.
Lips I dreamed of.
"You ready?"
I noticed her shallow breathing. "Sure."
Smiling, I slowly lowered my lips onto her stomach, not missing the way that her back arched toward my touch.
I licked my way up her stomach, grinning as goosebumps appeared in my wake. I glanced up at her, and her eyes were on me.
She wasn't laughing.
I continued letting my tongue drag up her stomach until I was at the line of her bikini. Feeling bold, I slowed down the pace and licked extra slow, savoring every moment.
I licked a trail up the column of her neck and she leaned her head back for me as I did so. I finally hovered above her, my lips inches from hers.
Ever so slowly, I lowered my mouth to the lime. As I did so, I felt the brush of her lips on mine.
Just a touch. Just a breath, and it ignited fire in my veins.
And at that moment, I forgot a lot. My heart stopped, my breathing quit, my thoughts ceased.
But I knew one thing, and it was screaming in the hollows of my brain.
I needed more.
I needed more of her.
And I would do whatever it took to have her.
happy thanksgiving to those who celebrate!!
i hope you love this chapter as much as i do. i think it has to be my favorite so far - the TENSION. my favorite thing to write.
thank you all so much for reading and i'll see you in chapter 19! <3