"You have been out a lot these days, Eren."
I turned around to see Mikasa standing by her bedroom door. She was knitting something but her eyes were focused on me. Goddamn, they seem like daggers.
"Oh well, I'm just at the market." I answered.
"And you never let me join you." How can she be so contrasting? Her voice is so soft and sweet, but my oh my, her eyes are piercing cold. Either way, both are equally captivating. "Will you please let me join you today? I also have to buy something at the market."
"Uhm, well, you can just tell me what you have to buy. I'll buy it for you. Plus, I will take long because .. I have a customer."
"Customer?"
"Remember? Sometimes I go out to fish and when we have an extra, I sell it."
"Oh well, yeah. But can't I just join you, Eren?" Her hands stopped knitting so she just stood there, looking at me with questioning eyes.
"No, Mikasa. I can meet Vina alone."
"Vina? A girl?"
Did I .. say something wrong for her to react so violently?
"Okay. You just go alone. I'll ... knit here ... alone too." She pouted and went inside her bedroom. I can even hear her locking the door, making me question my entire existence. What have I done? Did I upset her? Which part of that triggered her?
Well, in all honesty, I don't have customers to meet. I didn't get to catch an extra fish the last time I went out. However, I do have a Vina to meet ... but I am her customer. Mrs. Terry recommended Vina, her daughter-in-law, to me because I was looking for a person who can make beautiful bouquets.
After giving it a lot of thought, I have decided to take my chances and ask Mikasa out on a date. Besides, didn't I run away with her because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her? So, here I am, trying to make the most out of it. I only have four years left ... I can't afford to waste even a millisecond.
"So, how is the bouquet my daughter-in-law made?" Mrs. Terry asked.
"It's pretty. Look." I said and showed it to her.
"I think Mika will like this, Ren. You are doing a great job at this! Don't worry, Thomas and I will be here to help you. He also has a couple of suits here so you will look so handsome later when you ask her out on a date."
"Thomas?"
"My husband, silly." Then, a tall man suddenly entered Mrs. Terry's house and gave her a kiss on her cheek.
"Good day, Karla." My eyes widened at the mention of that name. Mrs. Terry's name is Karla? No wonder, Mrs. Terry looked beautiful. She also has a bit of resemblance to my mother. Remembering her suddenly made guilt creep into my entire system, almost making it impossible for me to stop myself from crying in front of Mrs. Terry and her husband.
"Eren, this is Thomas. He is my husband." Mrs. Terry said and hugged him.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. Terry." I greeted him.
"Nice to meet you too, young man. My wife here has nothing but good words for you and your soon-to-be-lover." At the mention of Mikasa, my heart lightened. Every time someone talks about her, everything about my life and this world suddenly becomes so precious.
"I want to cut my hair." I untied my bun and let my hair fall down. Mikasa never complained about me growing out my hair. She always had compliments for me such as that I look great and handsome. However, I want to surprise her. I want to look presentable. I want to look likeable for her. I want to be the prettiest boy in her eyes.
"Good thing, Thomas is the perfect person for that."
They made me sit still on a chair in front of a mirror. This is quite nerve-wrecking as I hadn't let anyone but Mikasa touch my hair. Every time I hear the scissor and every time I see a strand of my hair falling, I feel anxious. However, the most nerve-wrecking part was when they were already cleaning my cut using a blade. One wrong move and they will give me a cut. One cut will lead to my transformation. I don't want to become a titan right here and now!
"And done." When Thomas said that, I was able to let out a relieved sigh. "Well, now I think it's time to dress you up. It's getting quite late, young man."
"Oh, no no no. Look at his face. He has a stubble. He has to shave first!" Mrs. Terry then cupped my cheeks and carefully scanned my face.
"Well then, while you are busy shaving his stubble, I'll be rummaging our closet for a suit that will fit him." Thomas ran to their bedroom while Mrs. Terry stayed with me. Although she left for a while to get a soap, she didn't take much time.
As she was putting soap on the parts that need to be shaved, I couldn't help but stare at her in awe. I can't help but imagine my Mom doing this for me. If ... she was here, would she be with Mikasa and I right now? Would she help me ask Mikasa out on a date too? Would she be proud that I have grown into a young man? How would she react if she finds out that I want to marry Mikasa?
How would she react if she finds out my life is limited and that she'll have to bury me if ever?
"Why are you crying, Ren?" Mrs. Terry stopped all of a sudden. When she spoke, that's when I realized that I have already shedded some tears.
"I am sorry. You just remind me so much of my mother." I smiled.
"Hmmm." She nodded and continued. "You know? I used to do this for my son. On his first date with Vina, we did all the preparation and on their wedding, his Dad and I were the busiest people. I cried a lot when he was saying his vows."
I wish Mrs. Terry and Thomas' son show them enough appreciation. I would do anything just to have this kind of family. A happy and healthy one.
I wish I also have someone who'll cry at my wedding. If I tell Armin where I am, will he keep it a secret? Will he go here just to see how happy I am with my life with Mikasa now? Will he go here to ask the two of us to abandon the cabin and come back to the Scouts? God, I hope not.
After, Mrs. Terry washed and wiped my face. She even clapped when she saw me smile at the reflection of myself on the mirror.
"I found the perfect suit for Ren!" Thomas went out of their room with a complete attire hanging on his arms. They also offered to lend me a shoe, but I was already contented with the loafers I have right on right now. The suit that Thomas brought out was an all black one with a white under shirt.
He handed it to me and pushed me to their bedroom so I can start dressing up. While I was buttoning up my under shirt, I can't help but smile and shake at the same time. I am happy, but I am also so nervous.
When I went out of their bedroom, I can't help but feel conscious because of their silence. They were just looking at me with their hands on their mouth, making me wonder if I really wore this correctly.
"Do I look bad?" I asked.
"No, dear, you look perfect!" Mrs. Terry exclaimed.
"She will surely say yes, Ren." Thomas gave me a pat on my shoulder and smiled.
As I was about to leave, they gave me the bouquet and gave me good luck messages and some tips I can use for later. Walking back to the cabin felt so light and heavy at the same time. I love being in the cabin with Mikasa, but it also makes me so nervous at the same time because I'll be asking her out tonight!
It took us hours just to get me ready for this special day. I hope Mikasa likes my new haircut.
When I opened the cabin door, the lights were off but there were lights peeking from the door of Mikasa's room. As I take my slow and careful steps, the world seems to move slowly too.
So, I knocked on her door and waited for her to open up. When she finally did, she welcomed me with a shocked expression on her face.
"You cut you hair." She pointed out.
"Yeah." I smiled shyly.
"And you have flowers."
"Yes, Mikasa."
I don't know why, but it felt as if I travelled back into time. I feel like the boy who wrapped the scarf around her and right now, all I'm seeing is the girl who embraced the warmth I offered, the girl I took home with me and my father. I can see Mikasa ... the Mikasa who woke me up from my nap when I was resting under the tree up on that hill where we used to race all the time.
With tears on her eyes, she spoke, "did I perhaps ... travel back to years ago?"
I have a feeling we are seeing the same thing.
"What's all of this for, Eren?"
At that moment, I found myself dropping all my doubts and fears of not being able to do love right. From this day forward, I'll love her in every way possible. I'll love her in a way that she would feel it and know it. I'll love her in a way that she'll finally be able to acknowledge the beauty she possesses. I'll love her in a way ... that'll break boundaries and time limits.
"I love you, Mikasa."
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Thank you for reading!