ROWAN
After dinner, I headed back up to my room because today had worn me out which was surprising. In reality, we really didn't do too much, nothing like what I would have been doing at volleyball camp. I wanted to take a quick shower before bed so I scrambled to get my pajamas. Steven must have been in the shower currently because I could hear him singing super loudly.
I noticed Belly stop in the hallway before peaking her head into my room. "I'm going for a night swim then watching a movie with my mom and Susannah. It's the first night tradition, want to join?"
I looked over to the alarm clock which read 8:45 PM. It was still early and as exhausted as I was, I figured a few more hours wouldn't kill me.
"Sure, I'm going to shower quickly," I replied and with that, she took off.
I sat down on the bed, pulling out my phone so I could scroll through Instagram. I noticed I had a few notifications and once they finally loaded they were all from Jeremiah.
@jeremiahfisher followed you
@jeremiahfisher and 210 others liked your photo
@jeremiahfisher and 306 others liked your photo
I clicked on the photo he liked and it was a throwback picture of Belly and me at the fair. We were both holding a chocolate ice cream cone, half of it on our hands and arms and the other half around our lips. We both had the biggest smiles on our faces. I posted this picture for her birthday last year with the caption -
"I love you more than I love chocolate ice cream - jk, happy birthday, Bells"
I then clicked on the next photo he liked and it was an action picture of me playing volleyball. The picture was taken right before I spiked the ball. It had a caption of -
"This sport has my whole heart"
I followed Jeremiah back, but before I could look at his pictures I noticed him walking out of the bathroom. He was dressed up in a Hawaiian print button-down shirt. Before he walked right past my door he peaked his head in just like Belly did.
"Are you staying with the moms or coming to the bonfire tonight?"
Oh right, the bonfire that the creepy gas station guy invited Belly to. We haven't had a chance to talk about it yet so I just shrugged my shoulders at Jeremiah.
"I'll have to ask Bells. I think we might be staying with the moms. Some movie night or something?" I arched my eyebrow, not really sure if I was even allowed to leave without Laurel's approval.
Jeremiah frowned. "Well, if you change your mind, here's my phone number." He started to hand his phone to me, but all I could think about was how sly he was.
As he handed me his phone our fingers brushed against each other for a brief second causing my fingertips to tingle. I brushed off that feeling, typing in my information and sending myself a text so I would have his number.
"Awesome, I'll be waiting." He sent me a smile and walked out.
I took a deep breath, hoping it would calm me down, but it didn't help.
Why didn't Belly warn me about him?
——————
As I was about to head downstairs to go watch the movie with the moms, I met Belly in the hallway. She had a sad look on her face. I squinted my eyebrows at her and followed her back into her room.
"No movie?" I asked.
"No, I'm just so sick of the boys always making me feel like I'm a child. I'm literally almost sixteen. Also, Conrad and I were talking by the pool and something just felt different." She sighed, sitting down on her bed. I did the same, crossing my legs so I was sitting crisscrossed.
"Different? Good different?" I asked. I hated seeing her like this and I know for a fact it was mostly due to Conrad and not about the bonfire.
"I don't know, Jeremiah and Steven interrupted and then they just all left to the bonfire." She leaned against my shoulder so her head was resting on it. Her hair was still wet from her night swim and I could feel my t-shirt start to get damp.
"We should go to that bonfire and show Conrad that you're grown up. You're not some child anymore Bells, you're a blossoming young lady." I tried to joke a bit to make her laugh which she did and slightly slapped my leg.
"Are you just saying that because you secretly want to go to the bonfire to hang out with Jeremiah?" She sat up and wiggled her eyebrows at me.
I rolled my eyes at her, slapping her leg this time.
"No, I want to hang out with you. You never know, you might meet a boy there." Maybe something new is what she needed to push past her feelings for Conrad. I suddenly felt hypocritical because I already made it known that I didn't want another boy to get over what Jace did to me.
"Same goes for you."
——————
We FaceTimed Taylor, before actually agreeing to go. Taylor basically convinced both of us and she actually packed two of her 'sexy' dresses into Belly's suitcase before we left for Cousins. The 'sexy' dress in question was a white, spaghetti strap dress that hugged my mid-thighs. Small pink flowers were spread evenly among the dress.
The two of us successfully snuck out of the house which kind of made me feel dirty. I have never snuck out of the house before and the last thing I want to happen is to make Laurel or Susannah disappointed. I'm sure Laurel would tell my mom and she would also be disappointed as well. I am praying that doesn't happen though and I know it won't. We both promised each other we would head back either by ourselves or with the boys and sneak back in the back door.
We made our way to the bonfire, and as if we both had a red blinking arrow above our heads, gas station guy approached us.
"Yo, gas station girl." He is so not cute at all, even in this dim lighting.
Belly tried to get out of the conversation as I scanned the faces around the fire. I decided not to text Jeremiah and just show up instead in case he'd tell Steven. I know Steven would have a fit about us showing up.
Of course, the first person I see is Steven. I know I'd rather be bitched at by him than spend another second with this pedo.
"Steven!" I yelled, waving my arm to try and get his attention. He was with some girl, walking hand in hand when he turned to look over at Belly and me. He instantly glared at the both of us as he made his way over.
"What are you two doing here? And I-I'm sorry, wh-what are you wearing?" His eyes scanned back and forth between Belly and me. Steven has always been the overprotective brother that I never had. As much as he would hate to admit it, he truly cares about us even though we are the two annoying little "sisters".
"I invited her," Creepy gas station guy pointed at Belly and not me. "Who the fuck are you?"
I sent gas station guy the nastiest look even though he was staring at Steven.
"I'm her brother. She's 15, you pedo." Steven shouted back.
"Exactly what I was thinking!" I chimed in which made Belly glare at me.
"I'm almost sixteen." She interjected, but gas station guy backed off and walked away, leaving Belly, Steven, the girl he was with, and myself standing awkwardly.
Almost instantly Steven and Belly begin to fight, causing a huge scene. My entire face was hot and I knew it was not due to the blazing bonfire. I looked over at the girl Steven was standing with and she looked at me shrugging her shoulders.
I was about to break up their fight until Belly fell to the ground.
Oh no, Bells.
I went to help her up, but right in front of us was Conrad kissing some girl wearing a Red Sox hat. The two of them stopped kissing once Conrad noticed that the person who fell was Belly.
This just keeps getting worse and worse.
Where is Jeremiah? He could make this entire situation better. We haven't even been at the fire for 10 minutes.
Belly starts bickering with Conrad and thankfully, my wish comes true. Jeremiah runs over to us, a huge smile on his face.
"Belly! Rowan! You came, we can all hang out now, you guys." I could tell he had zero idea what was going on because he sent Steven a confused face when he said he was taking us home.
I wanted to argue with him, but we had already made the grandest entrance in history.
Jeremiah thankfully talks Steven out of it and he leaves with the girl, Shayla.
"I thought I told you to text me if you were coming." Jeremiah turns towards me. He didn't seem angry, but his confrontational statement took me aback.
"We just wanted to surprise you guys." I answered, turning my head towards Belly who had a suspicious look on her face.
"Well I'm glad the two of you came, I -" Jeremiah was cut off by a girl across the bonfire calling his name. There was actually a group of girls over there who all had beers in their hands and silly smiles on their faces as if they were all just talking about him.
A feeling of disappointment rushed over me for some strange reason. I hated it. So he is just flirty with everyone, got it.
"I'll be right back, stay put." That is all he said before he ran over to the girls. I watched as one of them wrapped her arm around his waist and he did the same thing back. He had a huge grin on his face and it looked like he was laughing.
Maybe I need a beer.
I'm not a big drinker, not like some of my friends. Two to three beers are always plenty for me, but right now, I feel like I need ten. Not because Jeremiah is flirting with five different girls. I can't be annoyed about that. I just met the guy today. I'd be a fool if I let this get to me.
I have to keep to my word and make sure this summer is boy and drama-free.
I'm not off to a good start.
——————
Four beers later I was feeling very bubbly. Belly and I went our separate ways when a guy from our seventh-grade Latin Convention noticed her and started a conversation. Myself, on the other hand, was playing Beersbee with three other guys. (For those who don't know what Beersbee is, you have two posts across from each other that have a beer on it. Two people stand at one post and two others stand at the other post. Your goal is to throw a frisbee and try to knock down the opponents' beer off the post/hit the post to get points. If you knock off the opponents' beer they have to drink it.)
My partner was some guy named Kaden and the two other guys were Adam and Josh. I was truly having a great time because Kaden and I were kicking ass. I'm so happy Belly and I decided to come to this bonfire. Even though the beginning was rocky, it's turning out to be an amazing night. Being buzzed is also helping with that.
I caught the frisbee from Adam who threw it before it hit our post and immediately threw it back at their post, knocking down their beer. Both Adam and Josh tripped in the sand as they tried to catch the frisbee and the beer. Their clumsiness made both Kaden and I crack up, the two of us high-fiving.
"Rowan, you snipper you. I want you on my team next." Adam laughed before shotgunning the beer.
"What can I say? I'm pretty-" I was suddenly cut off by a group of people groaning. My eyes found Belly who was on the ground holding her face and then Conrad who was fighting with gas station guy.
You got to be kidding me. As I was about to help Belly, Cam beat me to it. Just like that a bunch of people were screaming "cops!" as headlights lit up the beach.
My heart sank, not knowing where to run. A hand grabbed my wrist, and right away I knew it was Jeremiah.
"Let's go!" He shouted, dragging me up the beach. The two of us ran as fast as we could. I'm not really sure if I was even running fast because my head was spinning.
A red Jeep came into my view, I figured it was Jeremiah's because I remember seeing it back at the beach house. The two of us slowed down, breathing heavily.
I'm not sure if I'm more scared or riding the high of adrenaline. My hands fell onto my knees, taking deep breaths and trying to wrap my head around what just happened.
Then I started laughing, hard.
"Are you drunk?" Jeremiah asked, grabbing onto my arm and lifting me up so I wasn't bent over anymore. I continued to laugh, tears pricking in the corners of my eyes.
"No." I barely managed to get out. I'm not sure why I lied to him, I know he saw me drinking. While I was playing with Kaden, Adam, and Josh, I could feel Jeremiah's gaze on me. I'm not sure why he kept looking over at me when he had plenty of company around him.
"Get in." Is all he said, opening his passenger door and helping me in. He then started to buckle me up, accidentally brushing his hand across my bare thigh.
I stopped laughing.
"You're no fun." I pouted, crossing my arms. Jeremiah leaned back up, hanging onto the side of his door.
"And you're drunk." He shook his head while his lips curled up just a tad before closing the door.
Soon enough Conrad crawled into the back seat, totally out of it. Jeremiah then got in too, looking around at all the people who were heading back.
I turned my body so I could look at Conrad. I have not really said anything to him today other than our brief introduction. It's strange to me. Jeremiah has been so easy to talk to, but Conrad is basically a mute.
"You drunk too?" I questioned and he nodded in response.
"Are you?" He asked and I nodded back at him.
"Great, I'm stuck with two drunkies who don't know where Belly or Steven are." Jeremiah seemed annoyed which I can understand.
Ignoring him though, I looked out my window to see Belly and Cam approaching, giggling back and forth. Seeing her smile and happiness made me happy.
"Well, this drunkie just found her."
———————
"Sorry again for all the trouble, have a good night Officers." Laurel's voice rang through my ears as I held my head in my hands. I was sobering up quickly just at the thought of Laurel's disappointment.
I wanted to cry.
"How could you guys be so irresponsible?"
A tear trickled down my cheek as I raised my head to look at my aunt. Even though she was talking about all of us, I really felt the pressure on me.
She went down the line, mainly targeting Conrad first since he is the oldest and then Belly because she never does this kind of thing and then she looked at me.
"And you, Rowan, you never behave this way. You're the one I can trust the most." Her eyes cut deep through my soul. I used all the power in my body to not burst out into sobs in front of Conrad and Jeremiah.
"I'm so so sorry Aunt Laurel. I'm so disappointed in myself." I felt everyone's eyes on me, my leg was bouncing out of control from this horrible feeling.
"As you should. Just... go to bed guys."
Belly grabbed my hand and led me up the stairs. Steven, Jeremiah, and Conrad were not too far behind us.
As Belly and I turned into my bedroom, I broke down.
Huge crocodile tears rolled down my face and snot began to drip down my chin. I have always been a good kid because of this exact reason. I hated disappointing adults. I hated the way it made me feel and I hated the thought of having to apologize tomorrow and prove that I'm not a terrible person. I was the kid who would cry every time I was yelled at- which was not very often, but I would always apologize straight away because of the guilt.
Belly rubbed my back then stood up to grab a few tissues.
"Tell me you at least had fun, Row." She asked while I blew my nose. I was finally starting to calm down and fewer tears rolled down my cheeks.
I couldn't help but smile a bit, because I did have a great time.
"I had a lot of fun, Bells." I looked over at her and she had a smile plastered on her face.
"You have mascara like all over." She laughed while taking one of the tissues to wipe off my smeared mascara.
"I probably look like a freak. I'm sorry I cried, it's just-" She cut me off by just nodding.
"I know, but my mom could never stay mad at you. You're her little Rowie." Her words made me feel a bit better.
I wanted to change the subject so I asked, "How was your night? Mr. Cam-Cameron?" I joked using Jeremiah's name for him. Belly smiled at me, setting down the tissue.
"It was great. I really do think things could work between us." Hearing her say this shocked me because of her undying love for Conrad. Belly has had a crush on him since we were ten! There's no way Cam could just swoop in and steal all her feelings.
I wasn't going to say this though, instead, I smiled widely. "I'm happy for you."
She smiled hard. "Thank you, now tell me about the boys you were playing that game with! The one who was your partner is cute."
I fell back onto the bed, Belly copying my motion. The two of us stared up at the ceiling fan. "His name is Kaden and yes he is cute, but I'm not looking for anything, remember?" Jace really ruined all boys for me. I know I will not be like this forever, but I can't deal with the pain again. Just the mere thought of what happened between us makes me feel sick.
"Listen, I know Jace has made you hate all men, but-"
"No buts, I'm tired." I closed my eyes, not ready to listen to what she had to say. I've been doing this a lot lately whenever anyone brought up his name.
"Okay Row, see you in the morning." I'm glad she decided to drop the Jace topic. She side hugged me and I side hugged her back before she got up and went to her room.
I got up as well so I could grab my water bottle that was on the dresser. As I did, there was a knock on my door.
"Come in." I said, taking a few sips.
Jeremiah walked in, two red pills sat in his cupped hand.
"Figured it would be best for you to take these now before you have a massive headache in the morning." He shut the door behind him, setting the headache medicine on the nightstand.
"I appreciate it, thank you." His gesture was sweet, I can admit that.
I took a swig of water before popping in the two pills. I know people normally drink the water afterwards but I hate the taste of pills as they sit on my tongue for longer than a second.
Jeremiah watched me, shoving his hands into his pocket.
I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to say now, isn't this the part where he walks out and says goodnight?
Even though I was still in my dress, I pulled back the sheets and climbed into bed. Jeremiah was still watching me.
"You're sleeping in your dress?" He questioned, a slight chuckle leaving his lips as if I was crazy.
I started to take out my earrings. "Well, I would change, but someone who I have only known for a day is standing in the room." I eyed him up this time.
Jeremiah closed his mouth together in a straight line. "Right, I'll let you sleep." He started to back away towards the door, placing his hand on the doorknob. I watched as he took it off the knob.
"I guess I just wanted to say I'm glad that you were able to come up this summer. Belly seriously talks very highly of you, and Laurel, and I guess Steven too. What I'm getting at is I hope that we will be able to become friends this summer because you seem like a really cool person." His words surprised me. I wasn't expecting him to say that.
"Thank you, Jeremiah. I'm excited to become friends too." I smiled over to him and he smiled back.
"Well, I'll leave you alone now. Goodnight, Rowan." He opened the door for real this time.
"Goodnight, Jeremiah."
Maybe this is what I need. A boy who is just a friend. A boy who can not be more than a friend. I can manage that.
I hope.