Going to school the next day felt so awkward. I wasn't aware that my performance had been recorded and was now making its way to viral status on social media platforms, which made everything so much worse.
I'd already called Veronica and bitched her out for the on-the-spot call. Deep down, I was thrilled to be able to perform it live, but it wasn't supposed to leave my notebook and I wasn't supposed to be on stage. Ever.
I kept my head down and made my way to the AV club room where Jughead had requested to meet to transfer the camera footage to VHS tape. I quickly shut the door behind me to protect myself from the gossiping whispers in the hallway that seemed to follow my every footstep.
"Hey," Betty Cooper's voice froze me in my spot against the door. I took a deep breath before turning to see she was the only one in the room. She looked guilty too, which meant that being alone was on purpose.
"Hi, Betty," I returned as I walked forward to sit on a chair and tossed my bag on the floor. "Where's Jughead?"
She sat on the desk across from me. "I asked him to give us some time to talk. If that's okay."
"Don't have much of a choice, but sure." I sighed and crossed my arms, giving her my full attention. "So, what are we talking about first? You killing my ex-boyfriend in the woods or you and Archie sneaking behind my sister's back?"
Watching her jaw drop was so rewarding. Busted.
"Um, Jughead. As for Archie, I don't... it's not-"
"Whatever, Betty." I shook my head in annoyance and met her gaze. "What do you want to talk about?"
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry," She blurted. "I know nothing will make up for what happened, but I'm so, so sorry. At the moment, I just wanted to do what was right, and I knew how hard you and Jughead were working to figure out the mystery with Stonewall. I saw that as a chance, our final chance in ending whatever nightmare that was."
I sat up straight. "Betty, that's the thing. It was never an 'our' situation! It was me, and Jughead. There was nobody else involved minus you guys being at the party! I don't understand what was so hard about going through the motions and telling me after. Everyone could've stayed at my apartment, we would not have had to go home and lie to our parents, and we could've made up our story and been fine! There was no reason to leave me out."
She looked up at the ceiling. "I know, I know. If I could go back in time and change it, I would. I really would. But I can't, and after last night..." She paused and rubbed at her eyes. I hadn't noticed she'd been crying. I don't know why she was, considering all of this was true. "I knew you were hurting, I know that's still true, but watching you sing last night, and watching Jughead's reaction... I just felt so horrible. You probably hate me, and he and I aren't really friends right now, but I was doing what I thought was right. And I'm sorry."
Whatever whirlwind Betty Cooper had herself caught up in, I didn't want to be a part of it. She had a lot going on, and I watched her family become a broken mess, but not once did I treat her the way she's treated me.
"Betty," I sighed and rubbed my hands over my face. "Look, whatever happened, happened. There's no point in talking about it now because we can't change it. I also don't want to lie to you, I don't think you and I will ever be friends again. We can complete this year and be cordial with each other, but the second I leave this town, everything stays here. This is not coming to haunt me in California."
She sniffled and nodded. "Okay. Okay. Um, thank you, and I'm sorry, again. I always will be."
I met her gaze and nodded, forcing myself to give a small smile in hopes that she would stop crying and spare me the awkward tension.
--
I didn't realize that this whole tape thing was going down today, but considering we were running out of time before prom, I found myself standing in front of Blue Video with two tapes in my possession. One being the snuff film that Jughead and Betty created and the other, a backup tape of her father as the Black Hood.
Pushing the door open, I forced myself to put on a brave face as the man behind the counter caught my gaze. "Welcome to Blue Video."
I gave him a small smile and made my way to the counter.
"You look familiar to me. You come in here before?" He asked as he looked me over.
I shook my head, already disliking the way he spoke to me. "No, never. A classmate of mine from prep school said you buy videos. Underground videos. My friend and I saw this video at a party last weekend. It got boosted. It's... of a girl, getting killed. For real."
"A snuff film. Let me take a look."
I handed the film over, allowing him to place the tape in his TV to watch. He barely made it halfway before hitting the stop button. "Sorry, sweetheart. You were conned. Or you're trying to con me. This snuff is a fake."
I didn't let his comments phase me and leaned my forearms against the counter with a smirk. "I was worried that this tape might not be authentic, so I brought a backup that I know for a fact is the real deal."
Reaching into my bag, I slid over the extra tape Betty had given me, which David snatched up and replaced the snuff film in the player. A young boy appeared on the screen, sitting in a wooden chair as a woman off-camera spoke to him.
"What is this?" David asked as he observed the scene.
"The birth of a serial killer," I responded with a smirk, knowing he was watching me. "The Black Hood as a little boy."
"Is that really him? The Black Hood?"
I nodded. "Yeah, that's him."
David's whole mood changed at the film. "Could I screen this at a little film festival/rave I'm organizing?"
I shrugged and acted like I was thinking my response over. "I mean... I guess. But I want to be invited."
David chuckled, "Well, that certainly is a fair trade, don't you think?"
--
Despite my hopes, said Rave was that evening, which meant I would likely miss most of KO's show-off against Archie. I had pulled together the scraps of my clothing to find black ripped jeans, a black tank top, and one of Veronica's leather jackets.
The back entrance to Blue Video was in a graffiti-ridden alley with various homeless people scattered around. I kept my gaze low and forked over the ticket David had given me earlier in the day to gain access to his private showing.
"Welcome to the film society, sweetheart. We've got your movie playing in Room 317."
I gave him an odd look at the nickname before pushing passed to enter the building. I quickly bolted down the hallway where the back stairs led to an emergency entrance. Praying the alarm wouldn't go off, I opened the door to let Jughead in. His hood was up over his head, keeping his face partially hidden in case someone caught sight.
We followed the stairs up to the showing level. Each room had a theme for its designated film, strobe lights elevating the effects as we made our way down the hallway.
"What exactly are we looking for?" I asked as I shied away from a kid who ran screaming from a room.
"To see if any of the Auteur's movies are playing," Jughead answered, "Or if any of these people are fans of his."
We paused near the next corner as cosplayers passed on either side of us to go to their designated film rooms. It seemed others wanted their identities a secret, which would make our hunt even more difficult.
"Let me get a lay of the land first."
I followed his steps quickly, catching a glance at a room that was showing the tickle tape that Fangs, Toni, Kevin, and Co. had created. I couldn't believe this kind of thing had been going on for so long and nobody knew about it... minus those who wanted to find it.
We continued scouring the hallways until stumbling upon a set of four back-to-back rooms, all playing films that the Auteur created.
"He's gotta be in here," Jughead whispered. I pulled my jacket hood over my head, walking into the room that was occupied with people dressed in what reminded me of Purge masks. They didn't even look to be watching the films and were instead just standing in awkward circles.
Jughead attempted to talk to some, but all of them shoved him away or ignored his questions. He eventually got frustrated and ripped the mask off of one of the viewers. "Oh, no I'm actually such a big fan. If I'm lucky, I'll get an autograph," He taunted and shoved the kid back.
Someone grabbed my elbow and spun me to face them before I stumbled into Jughead's back. Some kid that I'd never seen before stared back at me. "The Black Haired Beauty, you're even hotter in person."
My jaw dropped slightly at the unfamiliar name, but I didn't have a chance to question it before Jughead was literally flying out from behind me to punch the kid across the face. The static atmosphere started to crumble with the violence and I was quick to step in before Jughead started a fight we wouldn't be able to finish. "Jug, we're leaving. We're leaving!"
I grabbed the fabric of his jacket to pull him out as the room descended into chaos with everyone beginning to fight each other. There were still people flooding the hallways, but I managed to catch a glimpse of someone at the end of the hallway in an owl mask, holding a video camera to record the scene around them.
"Is that..."
Jughead immediately picked up where I was looking. "That's gotta be him."
Our pace picked up in hopes of catching the masked man while also trying to sort our way through party-goers. It came to an abrupt stop though when I made eye contact with Jughead's little sister.
"Jellybean?"
"Jughead?"
I stared at the young blonde in shock before Jughead pointed toward our mystery filmer. "Sav, go. Let me stay with Jellybean."
I didn't wait for more questions and shifted around them to attempt to follow the masked individual. I rounded the corner they disappeared down but was left with an empty hallway and an emergency exit door. My feet slid on the slippery floor as I took off and shoved the door open but was met with an empty parking lot and pouring rain.
"Did you catch him?" Jughead's voice echoed in the empty stairwell behind me.
I groaned and turned to face him and his sister. "No, he's gone."
Jughead shook his head, no longer worried about missing our shot and instead, curious why his little sister was busy partying at an explicit filming party. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her from the building before walking past me. "Come on, let's go chat."
--
"How'd you even know where to go, Jellybean?"
The girl sat across from Jughead and me, a pile of fries and a milkshake in front of her as she snacked. Pop's was relatively empty for the night, likely everyone at Archie's fight or hiding from the rainy weather.
"My friend, Lauren, from soccer. Her older brother heard about a rave," She answered simply before taking a drink.
"From who?"
"I don't know. He's on some email list." She shrugged at her brother's question and noticed his disappointment, "Jug, I swear I've never been to a rave before."
Jughead nodded. "Will you just promise me you're not gonna go to any more X-rated raves from now on? Especially if I end up at the University of Iowa. Okay?"
She nodded but looked at him expectantly. "Yeah... Are you really going to go?"
She looked so small in her spot, with her neatly braided hair and cute outfit. My heart broke for her when I realized she'd be losing another member of her already small family. Gladys hadn't come back to Riverdale since and with Jughead leaving, FP was the only solace the girl had.
The boy next to me sighed, "Look, JB. I know it's going to be hard being the only one here, but I'll still come back and visit. And you can come to visit me when you have days off school. It's not a permanent thing."
"But what about you and Savanna? You guys are going to be so far apart."
I winced at her question and tapped my nails against the coffee mug in my hands. "I uh, that's complicated Jellybean. I'll be far away from a lot of people here."
Her pout grew even more, her expression threatening to turn angry. "You're just going to give up?"
"Um..."
Jughead leaned forward over the table. "Why do you care what's going on with me and Savanna?"
Jellybean's eyes became watery, which confused me even more. "Because! If you and Savanna can't work things out, Mom and Dad never will and we're going to turn into some poster family for a broken home!"
I looked at her sadly, knowing exactly the heartbreak she was going through. I reached over the table to grab one of her hands in mine. "Jellybean, some people have to find their spot in life on their own terms, away from other people. Your mom and dad have that kind of relationship, but it doesn't mean they love you any less. It takes some time to adapt to change like that, but you were with your mom in Cleveland for so long... who's to say you won't make great memories here with your dad?"
She huffed and pulled away from me. "It's not the same and you guys know that. Why can't you guys just get over things and get back together?"
I sat back, shocked at her question. This wasn't something I was comfortable discussing with a 14-year-old girl, let alone the sister of my ex. Why did she care so much about what happened with mine and Jughead's relationship?
"JB, it's not your place to know stuff like that."
She rolled her eyes. "Can you quit trying to protect me from stupid shit?"
Jughead shifted, slightly stunned at her language and change of mood. "Excuse me?"
The younger girl was obviously fed up with us and slurped more of her shake before scooting out of the booth. "Forget it. You don't understand."
Silence enveloped the two of us as she stormed away. I shook my head before burying it in my arms on the table with a shaky breath. Leave it to Jughead's sister to be the one who pops the balloon and releases my guilty subconscious.
"Sorry, you know she didn't mean it."
"Hold your thought there. What the hell is The Black Haired Beauty?" I fired the question I'd been waiting to ask since Jughead knocked a kid out at the rave over the title.
A loud groan left his mouth as he rubbed his hands over his face. "We probably shouldn't talk about this right now."
"No," I snapped at his attempt to run from the conversation. "What is it? I haven't seen you fired up like that in a long time."
"Bret had more than one copy of our sex tape." His words were quiet enough that just the two of us heard them but it sounded like a scream in my head. "I ripped one apart at Stonewall, but I found the other one in the back room of Blue Video. Tore that one apart too, but I don't know how many people saw it."
Ignoring the pit of despair at the thought of people seeing me in that regard, intimately with someone whom I loved... I shook my head before sitting up sharply. "What are we doing, Jughead? No, like seriously, what are we doing? I feel like we're stuck in this constant loop of hurting each other, refusing to speak, and then comforting each other when something happens. It's toxic. It's self-destructive."
Jughead bit his lip and took a sip of coffee before sinking back into the booth. "So, what? You're saying we should just go no-contact?"
I slumped against the window, appreciating the cold air that seeped through it. "I don't know. I can't sit here and keep causing issues with your family and-"
"Come on, Sav. You know that's not it. Jellybean loves you, she's just caught up in everything going on. It'll be-"
"Do you realize how many people we fucked over by breaking up?" I asked and finally looked up at him. "Your sister hates me, your relationship with your dad is rocky because he didn't agree with you, Veronica barely looks at you, Archie barely looks at me. I can't handle the doubt in my chest about making this decision. Everyone questions why I'm near you. This is not normal!"
Jughead took a deep breath when I finished, letting his own thoughts stew. We sat in comfortable silence for a minute or two before he shifted his body to face me. "Hear me out."
"Listening."
"Prom is tomorrow, yeah?" I nodded, not seeing where he was going with this. He reached out and grabbed my hand. I hated seeing so much pain and apology behind his gaze each time he watched me. "Savanna, come to prom with me? One last time. Let me give you the dance you deserved last year, let me be with you for one more night and then we can stop this toxic loop."
I bit my lip hard to stop myself from tearing up and resulted for taking a deep breath, nodding as I did.
"Okay?" Jughead's free hand came up to brush a stray tear from my cheek. "Please."
"Yeah." I nodded again. "Let's go to prom."
--
love them, okay byeeee