✅️ Bonus POV: John "Soap" MacTavish
Finally! Thank fuck, I feel better now!
I thought I'd be losing Angie twice; the torture she endured was brutal, and the fact that I wasn't sure of my chances with her nearly sent me into a crazy spiral. She was the only one willing to listen to my ramblings and has been accepting me for who I was and what I could offer... A lass like her was one of a kind. And learning that she was waiting for me to get over Elise has made me appreciate her even more; she's my real Mo'Leannan for sure. She owns my heart.
I knew I wasn't easy to deal with, and adding the fact that I was still attached to Elise*, although she's married to Ghost, I was making things more complicated. I had to come correct towards Angie, she deserved my utmost respect and my undivided attention.
I went back to my dorm feeling like I've built the juiciest C4 bomb ever made; I was happy and proud of myself. Gaz was coming back from the shooting range when we bumped into the corridor.
- Returning from the medical center, Soap?
- Hey Gaz, ye doing awright yeah? - I was in a great spirit. - Sure, just came back from Mo'Leannan room ~ I'm mean, Angie's room.
- Oh, I see... - he snickered at my slip up. - Somebody has finally a girlfriend, yeah?
- Away n' bile in yer heid, Gaz! - I chuckled. - Don't say it out loud; we don't want to get written up for that, yeah? So come on, keep it low.
- No fret, mate. I'm not here to rat you out. I know how to keep a secret.
- Appreciate it, mate.
- Tell me something; did you solve things out with Elise?
- Not really. - that question was stingy. - But at least I'm able to offer more to Angie, anno? I was lacking in some matters. All because I was still attached to Elise.
- If Elise doesn't know that you ditched your feelings for her, she will still think you guys can hang out like before. And you know she uses your feelings to keep you around when she's upset with Ghost.
I was feeling awkward, knowing that Gaz knew way too much about my secrets with Elise; they talk to each other almost every bloody time! Swear to Jesus, they will slip up someday and get me into trouble. They were... What's the term again? Ah, right... They were "besties".
- I know, and that's fucked up, to be honest. - I sighed loudly. - It took me a while, but I recognize that I was in a dangerous game. I've always imagined that one day Ghost would catch us and kill us both.
- That was fucked up indeed, mate. I tried to talk her out of it, but whatever reason she has in her mind, she dodges the subject often.
- I don't know what's her plan either, mate. - I scratched my head, feeling annoyed. - But in any case, I'll try to talk to her and clear things out. I don't want Angie stressing about that.
- Way to go, mate. Wishing the best to you. - Gaz smiled; his support meant a lot.
- Thank ye, mate. See ya around, yeah?
As soon as Gaz left, my expression changed from content to something else. I wasn't exactly confident with the situation; having to confront Elise about our weird friendship wasn't something that I was ready to do. Deep down Elise scared me, not going to lie... She was unpredictable, and it was difficult to read between the lines with her unless she allowed me to. And I couldn't go on and keep enabling that nearly sexual dynamic with her if I was finally dating Angie...
I had to put some boundaries. And fast.
While I was helping with the armory inventory, my phone chimed. I flinched; I knew who it was. I hid myself at the ammo shelves and checked my messages. My heart went up my throat... It was Elise.
As usual, she was shamelessly texting me, wanting to see me... My stomach fluttered, as always. She messed me up emotionally every time... But now I had to fight back those feelings; I couldn't allow myself into that trap anymore.
H
er way to dismiss the problems lined in the situation was impressive... Whatever means she had to have her fix with me she had no issues using it.
Elise was being selfish, and I was feeling like shit because I still liked her.
I have never been more nervous in my entire life, but that moment got me weak in the knees. Steammin' Jesus... confronting Elise was more stressful than disarm an old blockbuster bomb!
I took deep breaths and quickly left to the medical wing; I needed to see Mo' Leannan... I needed to feel safe in this entire situation.
She was the only one that could calm my nerves.
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Price had the dumb idea of organizing a massive sparring session with the new recruits and has put me, Gaz and Elise to not only guide them out but to also participate. I was feeling confident; I was showing off my prowess as an elite operator. A punch here, a kick there, an occasional subduing... Melee combat was definitely my thing, besides bombs.
Angie was at the watching bench, seeing the sparrings unfold and treating the hurt rookies. She was beautiful as always, even though she was visibly annoyed by what Price organized for the rookies. I couldn't avoid a chuckle, and shook my head in resignation.
After a few matches, I glanced at the watching bench and saw Angie talking to Ghost... They were too close to each other, nearly whispering on each other's ears. I felt a weird punch in my stomach, a bad feeling took over my head. I was jealous, feeling threatened by the situation. Although I knew that Angie wouldn't try anything, I didn't have the same faith on Ghost. After what I've done to Elise, I fully believed that he would try to get into Angie's pants simply out of spite and get even with me. My eyes were glued at them; every movement, every nuance, every subtle change of demeanor. I was expecting the worst out of them.
- What you staring at?
- Steammin' hell, Elise! Almost got me a heart attack! - my heart was pounding.
- Hahahahahahahaha! I'm sorry; didn't mean to scare you! - She seemed energetic. - I'm having fun seeing these rookies having their asses handed by you and Gaz.
- Yeah, right... - I was feeling awkward near her. - What ye actually want?
- I hate when you read me to filth... - she pouted, feeling annoyed. - I just want to talk... Finish our little discussion.
- I already said my piece, Elise. If you ruin my chance with Angie, I'll fuck it up your marriage. Simple as that.
- Aw, come on Johnny! What could possibly happen if we keep hanging out like always?
- It could fuck it up everything we have going on, Elise. - I sneered. - I don't know what's on your mind, but I don't want any part of it anymore.
- She really messed you up... - she retorted, giving me an ugly look. -For a womanizer, you really got tamed.
- So what about it? Don't I deserve to have a healthy relationship?
- At least not with her.
My eyes widened to what she had just blurted out. Elise was willing to keep me trapped into a dynamic where I don't have a say in it. She was selfish, and she had no problems admitting it.
Before I could remotely protest, Elise lunged at me, wrapping her arms around my neck and nuzzling it. I froze, unable to reject or dodge her without bringing unwanted attention to us. My heart sank as my eyes have met Angie's disgusted gaze, seeing Elise attached to me in public. I couldn't imagine what was possibly going through her mind at that moment while seeing me with Elise while we had to keep our relationship in secret... I felt like shit.
I saw her getting up and leaving, obviously because of me. But what got me scared shitless and insecure was seeing Ghost leaving with her... Fuck.
They were both being disrespected; and all kinds of scenarios flashed through my head. I wasn't ready to get cheated on. I wouldn't be able to handle the anger and the pain.
I could only hope that nothing happens... I love Angie. I didn't wanna lose her. Not to Ghost.
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*On my previous fanfiction "Skulls and Scars", Elise is the Original Character that gets involved with Soap and Ghost. It's a connected plot; give it a try when you feel like it! <3