I watched Jaelyn leave the restaurant with the same nigga she was at the game with last month, and I hated to see it. Apparently her and Drake had become more buddy buddy as he took it to stop and talk to her, and she made sure to wave bye to him. The shit lowkey fucked with me too.
Every nerve in my body reacted to seeing her. I missed her bad as hell. I contemplated on hitting her up multiple times but I didn't know what the fuck to say. And every time I had hit her up she ignored that shit. When I tried to catch her after class she damn near ran the other way. I knew if I hit her up again I needed to come correct, which to me felt like I needed to tell her I was all in with her. I felt like that was what she wanted or needed, shit I don't know. I just knew I wanted her back in my space.
The shit was fucking with me so heavy that I invited Chelsea here; something we said we wouldn't do. But I needed to put shit back in perspective, remind myself of why I was choosing her and would always choose her. But running into Jaelyn was not part of the plan, and the last thing I wanted was Jae thinking I got back with my ex this damn quick when she was plaguing my mind every damn day.
"You good babe?" Chelsea asked as I watched Jae walk out. I pulled my eyes from her as I looked at Chelsea, "you were zoned out weren't you?" She asked with a smile. My eyes shifted to Drake who was watching me like a hawk as he shook his head and went back to focusing on his food. "My bad." I let out as my eyes reached hers before I went back to eating my food too.
We finished up and then headed out as Chelsea asked me to stop by a Target so she could run in and grab some things. Drake and I stayed put in the car since she said it would be quick, and I knew it was a lie. She didn't know how to make a quick trip to Target and I wasn't about to be walking around for a hour.
I looked over at Drake once Chelsea was good and out the car, he smiled already knowing what I was about to get at. "Oh so you cool with Jae like that now?" He laughed, "c'mon man, she Tessie best friend. I be talking to her sometimes."
"And?" I questioned, he smiled, "and what?" I gave him a straight face, he knew what I was getting at. He laughed, "oh you want to know if she be asking bout you? She don't." I nodded, hating to hear that shit. Was I more bothered by the ending of us than her?
"But she miss you," Drake started up, "she tryna use that nigga to get over you but she miss you and that shit obvious. I knew she had you wide open. It's obvious you miss her too. What's the problem, why y'all doing this?" He asked with true confusion. "You got Chels here, she dealing with that nigga. What's up?" He asked.
I ran a hand down my face, "she asked about Chelsea, I was honest. She admitted she was basically falling for me and couldn't handle our arrangement, especially once knowing that I still was on Chelsea." Drake shook his head, "damn, then it really shouldn't be no problem on your end, why are you still on Jae? You got Chels, gon' always have her and if that's where your heart is then I don't understand. She did you a favor. Jae pussy like that or something?"
I bit my lip as I looked forward, "its beyond pussy man." I let out with a shake of my head, "I was on her heavy. She met my mom, that's what got us in this shit and how she found out about Chelsea. She said too fucking much." Drake's eyes got wide, "wait nigga, Jae met moms?" I nodded, "not on purpose, but I still embraced that shit. They popped up and we went with them to get some desserts at Tessie spot. She rode with my mama and I guess that's when the shit came up." I shook my head thinking about the shit and how I could have avoided all of this, that was the selfish part of me though.
"Shit. But to be real with you A, I'm still not understanding the problem. You said y'all were just fucking. She kept it real and didn't even get on that relationship tip with you like most of them do, she just removed herself from the situation and is clearly letting you enjoy your time with the girl you can't fucking let go off."
I tapped on the steering wheel as I chewed on my lip, hating that he was right in everything he said, and annoyed that he wasn't understanding how much I fucked with Jae.
"I want her Drake." I looked over at him as I said it, "I fucking want Jae, I hate that we not fucking with each other. Man, I invited Chelsea here, even after we agreed not to visit each other but I told her I needed her to come. Thinking that this shit was going to help, thinking it would put shit back into perspective on how she's the one, because seeing her always has. But that shit ain't working this time Drake." I paused before my emotions took over. "Fuck!" I yelled out as I hit the steering wheel. "Jae got my head so fucking gone and this shit scary. I haven't liked nobody like this since Chelsea and I only fucked with Jae for a few months so this is wild as fuck. I should not be on her this damn hard. She should not be plaguing my mind when I'm with Chelsea."
Drake looked surprised, "damn nigga, you really fuck with her. What you gon' do then?" He questioned, before I could even process the question or think of an answer he spoke again, killing the chances of me speaking on it again tonight. "Aye, Chelsea coming." I turned to see her walk towards the car, for the first time in life, it was actually a quick trip.
I unlocked the door and started the car, Jaelyn was really fucking me up and seeing her tonight fucked with me more. I had to get my mind right, I had the girl here who I planned on spending the rest of my life with. That's all I needed to focus on.
She easily got in the car as she sat her bag on the floor, "they ain't got shit in this Target." She let out. "I see, you ain't never came back that quick." I responded as I pulled out, headed to drop Drake off at Tessie's. "Aye," he let out. "Tessie and me going to the fair tomorrow, y'all should come." Chelsea instantly smiled, "yes! I haven't been in so long! Babe you have to win me a bear." I chuckled, "I got you." I looked in the rearview mirror at Drake, "we down for that, just let me know the time."
—
I would have told Drake fuck no had he let me know Jae would be here with a nigga. The look on Jae's face easily let me know she felt the same way. Drake did introductions of everyone as we all gave simple hey's. I knew Chelsea and I were going to separate from the group because there was no way I was doing this shit, and that we damn sure did. Halfway through Chelsea spotted a bear she wanted and made it known. "Ooo, get me that bear." Chelsea pointed to a huge ass bear that was at the game that Jaelyn and Bryce were at.
I shook my head as she pulled me over there. Out of all the fucking games here she had to choose this one. The game hadn't started so they asked if I wanted to join. "You gotta win bae!" Chelsea called out with a smile as she looked at Jae who stood by, "he's so good at these games. I hope Bryce is ready. He's competitive as hell." She spoke, I closed my eyes momentarily, not wanting them anywhere near each other; just for the simple fact that I knew it probably ate Jaelyn up to see this shit, because it damn sure was eating me up.
The game started as I tuned out any possible conversation they could be having. I easily beat Bryce, the nigga couldn't have been trying or just fucking sucked. I was able to get the balls in the highest one, allowing Chelsea to get the biggest bear. I turned to let her know to choose which one she wanted as I heard her telling Jaelyn our history of being together. I quickly called her name to nip that shit. She squealed as she chose her bear, my eyes floated to Jae who smiled at Bryce, satisfied with the little ass bear he won. Weak ass nigga. Couldn't get my girl no shit better than that? I tore my eyes from them as I focused on the man getting the huge ass bear down for Chelsea.
We separated from them again as we walked around the fair, "we ain't gon' be able to get on shit else cause you wanted me to win this bear." I addressed as I hit it. She laughed, "damn, I didn't even think about that." Then she shrugged, "we got to get on some and you know I'm here for the food more than anything anyways." I smiled, remembering all the times we went to the fair and all her ass did was try everything. Always putting a hole in my pocket for some damn food. She played basketball and the shit kept her in shape though, you would never know she could throw down the way she did.
We grabbed a funnel cake and some lemonades and took a seat at one of the tables as we caught up. "So, what was so urgent that you needed me here?" She asked, she had been here two days and this was her first time asking. "Just did, head was gone." I spoke as I ran a hand over my head. She grabbed my hand, "is it better now?" She held a smile. I returned it as I lied, "it's getting there." She moved her hand to pull off a piece of the funnel cake, "care to expand on it?" I shook my head no, "I'd rather not." She nodded, respecting it as she always did. She knew I would always talk when I was ready.
"Well I've missed you, so I'm happy you made me come." I leaned forward, "is that right?" She nodded, "and you playing, I been here two days and you ain't broke my back in yet." She let out a seductive smile. I bit my lip, "we can change that tonight." She smiled wider, "please do." She picked up her lemonade as she took a sip. "So, have any girls caught your attention lately?" She was always curious on whether or not I was dealing with someone.
"Have any guys?" I questioned, wanting to hear her answer first but I knew she wouldn't tell shit. She laughed, "well, you're selfish and stingy as fuck which makes you jealous as fuck. So you know I would not tell you if there was." I laughed to the truth in it, "and so are you, so I don't even know why you ask." She smiled, "well, clearly our feelings for one another are still intact then." I shook my head as I picked up my lemonade and drank it. I looked up seeing Tessie and Drake head our way as Tessie walked with a big snake around her neck. She was all smiles as they came and sat at our table. "Oo, nice win." Chelsea let out to Drake.
Drake looked at the bear that took up too much space, "no, that's a nice win. Adrian your ass always showing out." I shrugged with a smile, "I get the woman what she wants." She reached over to me, "and that's why I love you." She cooed. I sent a wink her way. Not too long after Bryce and Jae made their way over, "damn nigga, that's all you could get her?" Drake asked, looking at the bear in Jae's hand as she laughed. "I don't give a fuck about these stuffed animals. He played that game for fun, I would have been fine with nothing."
Drake kissed his teeth, "she just trying to be nice to your ass nigga." He let out as the girls laughed. "That bear may be little but I make up for it in other ways." He responded, that shit smooth pissed me off. Was she fucking him already? We'd barely been done two weeks.
"Owee, my bad big dog." Drake let out with a laugh as Jaelyn rolled her eyes with a smile and easily caught eyes with me, my face was straight as ever as everyone else was all smiles. "I'm going to head to the bathroom." She let out as she quickly took her eyes off of me. "You want me to go with you?" Tessie asked as she quickly shook her head no, "it's not far. Literally right over there." She pointed in the direction it was and departed from the group.
I waited a few minutes and made my way to the bathroom too, I waited outside the makeshift bathroom for Jae. She came out jumping as she put her hand to her chest, "Adrian, you scared me." I looked her up and down, she was chill, wearing some distressed jeans, a black hoodie from some local brand, and Jordan 1's on her feet. "You fucking him?" I asked. She laughed as she rolled her eyes, "that's the first thing you say to me?" She crossed her arms, "aren't you fucking her? Why are you worried about who I'm fucking?"
"Jaelyn are you fucking him?" I asked again, my voice slightly raised, and I ain't never raised my voice at her. But this shit was tearing me up, I had never been able to deal with her fucking with others and that shit hadn't changed, I still couldn't handle it. And throw sex in there? Man fuck no. "Why? Now your chest hurt?" She asked trying to be funny with a smirk on her face. "Welcome to the club."
She was making it clear I hurt her, but I was bothered by the fact that she wasn't answering my question, "Jaelyn." I spoke lowly as I tried to keep my cool, she didn't give a fuck, because she still avoided answering my question. "It's none of your fucking business!" She yelled out, "What I do and who I do no longer concerns you." She reminded me.
My jaw tightened as I focused on her face, she was so damn beautiful even with her looking like she hated even being in my space right now. She started to walk, clearly headed back to the table. I grabbed her as I pulled her closer to me, "Jae, I miss you so fucking much." She hitched a breath, "I'm sorry." I let out.
She looked at me with a mix of emotions swirling in her eyes, "yeah, you are. Cornering me and telling me that you miss me when your girl is less than twenty feet away? Like damn how did I miss the signs of how trash of a nigga you are? I really thought you were different. But I guess bomb dick will do that to you."
I shook my head, "Jaelyn, I'm not no trash ass nigga. I kept it real with you." She scoffed before laughing, "are you fucking delusional? Telling girls you can't and won't commit because you're focused on football and school when in reality you just tied to another girl."
"School and football are my fucking focus, I didn't lie. Regardless if there's more to why I won't commit, I made it clear that I wasn't in the market for it. And let's be clear she's not my girlfriend right now so let's not act like I'm some nigga out here fucking cheating because I'm not. I get you being upset for me not mentioning that shit, but what the fuck did you want me to say Jae? The only reason you this fucking mad right now is because you fell for me but Jae I fucking fell for you too. Everything I said to you I meant, I wasn't playing with your feelings, I wasn't feeding you sweet nothings. I meant every fucking word I said to you." I informed her as I stepped closer to her.
She shook her head no, the brim of her eyes watering as she quickly wiped it away. "We were never on even playing fields Adrian. It was always going to be her. And her being her right now makes that shit exceptionally clear. So you did play with my feelings, you did feed me sweet nothings, but half of that is on me, because I knew I wasn't supposed to let myself get to that level with you and I did."
"And I did too Jae, I was dumb for bringing her here but she's only fucking here because I thought she would help me get you off my mind. This is the first time you gave me the time of day Jae, you haven't gave me a chance to talk to you, to express how I fucking feel towards you. And you're right Jae she was endgame but you got me reevaluating that shit. The feelings I have for you are overpowering every fucking thing including how I thought I would always feel for her. I fucking want you Jaelyn. I'm sorry I brought her here, I'm sorry you had to see the shit the way you did but it put shit in perspective for me the same way the conversation with my mother put shit in perspective for you. This shit allowed me to see how fucking strongly I feel about you."
"I know this shit is not ideal, I realize how fucked up it looks for me to be expressing this shit with her twenty feet away but Jae you plague my mind all fucking day, even with her here. I need you in my space Jae."
Drake walked over, giving her no time to respond, "aye, it's been a little minute. Just making sure y'all are good." He stated as he looked between the two of us, it was clear tensions were high.
Jaelyn and I were laser focused on one another. She let out a deep sigh as she broke eye contact with me and looked at Drake, "yeah, we're good." She let out as her eyes drifted towards me momentarily. "Let me head back over there." She finished.
I shook my head. "So that's it?" I questioned, "Adrian man, c'mon. Just drop it for now. Chelsea or Bryce gon' be right behind me in a second." As soon as he said it Bryce walked up, he looked down at Jae whose emotions were unreadable. "You good?" He asked as he looked over at me. She nodded putting a smile on her face, "yeah, I'm good. Let's go."
"So that's it Jae? I said all of that, and that's all the response I get?" I didn't give a fuck no more, fuck that nigga. She turned and looked at me, completely surprised that I was still talking about it with everyone around. At this point Chelsea and Tessie were now over here as well.
Tessie and Chelsea's eyes went between me and Jae, as Jae spoke, "we can talk another time Adrian." The look on my face let it be known I didn't believe her, she'd been avoiding me like the plague. "I promise." She continued with eyes only for me. She turned grabbing Bryce's hand as everyone was trying to figure out what that was about.
Chelsea neared me as a look of concern mixed with confusion was etched on her face. "What was that about?" She asked as the rest of the group was heading towards the exit, we were moving a lot slower behind them. "We'll talk about it." I let out as she reached down to grab my hand.
I held her hand, hoping she wouldn't hate me for what I was about to drop on her.