I walk into the library making sure to stop by Mrs Schioler's desk before walking in to take a seat by the windows so I can wait for Asher.
Seconds turn into minutes and minutes turn into hours and hours turn into me standing outside the school library. I can't believe no I actually knew this would come someday. Since he's popular he wouldn't really care about missing things like this. I mean it's stupid to people like him.
I angrily walk outside school. I've wasted hours doing nothing. If I see him again.. no I'm not gonna go haywire on him, I'm weak in case you haven't noticed, I'm just gonna tell him I can't be his tutor anymore. Besides I have a new student now.
I stop when I see the parking lot full with preps. I easily spot Noah from where I stood. He leans on his car as Loren leans into him. That stupid blonde. She's everywhere and I can't believe Noah would actually be with her everytime after he spray painted her house. He's just as unbelievable as her.
My eyes land on Asher and I scoff when I see him making out with a blonde girl. He missed tutoring for a blonde. How smart. They're all dumb for blondes.
Just as I turn to walk out of here a bike comes stopping right in front of me. I put a hand on my chest. I was really shocked just now.
The biker gently takes off his helmet and I'm even more shocked to see buzz- Hernandez. He rides a bike and a cool one at that. The bike's really shiny. Almost like they just bought it.. or maybe he just washes it regularly.
"Need a ride?", He asks and I blink. He said what?.
"Uh it's.. I'm not sure I can get in", I tell him. He looks at his bike.
"I'll help you", he says then gets down. Wait is he really serious with this?. What if I fall with his bike? What if.. what if I'm too fat to get in.
"You okay?", He ask and I look up. He looks at me with concern and I nod, trying to look okay.
"Uh yeah it's just that I don't think I can really get in", I say putting a hand on my elbow so I wouldn't stand awkwardly.
"It's fine. There's always a first time for everything", he smiles and I smile back. "Okay so it's simple. You just have to put your foot her then toss yourself-
"Toss?", I ask looking frightened.
"Not entirely.. I mean, you just have to lift yourself up so you can get the other leg over", he explains and I nod.
"Yeah. So you ready?", He asks and I gulp.
"Uh..", I trail still not sure if I wanted to go with this plan.
"It's okay I'm here in case you fall", he says and I nod. Nice of him to offer to catch me. Pretty sure alot of people would move away just so I could fall. Wish is why crowd surfing has never been in my bucket list.
"..-", I don't even get the chance to let a word out when someone cuts me off.
"Her weight's gonna destroy your bike!", Someone yells and I turn to see Loren laughing with her friends. Noah, who she's resting on, has a neutral expression although he's brows are somewhat creased.
"Uh maybe this was a bad idea. I should.. I should go", I say already turning to leave but he stops me.
"Don't talk to her like that", Hernandez says loud enough for them to hear and actually stop laughing.
"Who's he?", Someone asks.
"Probably another guy she's helping out with homework. She's a homework slave", Loren says causing more laughter to erupt. Her insults didn't hurt me as much as Noah's silence. I watch him just stand there.
"Say something", I turn to Hernandez.
"What?", I ask trying to see with all the water coming up my eyes.
"Say something. Don't just let her talk to you like that. Fucking say something", he tells me and I'm stunned. What could I say?.
"But wha.. what should I say?", I ask.
"The first thing that comes to your mind when you look at her", he says and I turn to look at Loren who's still laughing so loud. Her hand still rested on Noah's chest and her eyes looked at me with disgust. I clench my fist together. She's just a-
"Blonde bitch!", My eyes widen and so did everyone else's only Hernandez has a different reaction. He had a smirk on. Even noah's wide eyed as well.
I look at Hernandez. "That was fire", he chuckles a bit and I smile but it turns down when I hear Loren.
"What did you say?", She asks walking towards us. I step back but then a push from behind brings me forward.
"She called you a blonde bitch", Hernandez says and I nudge his arm. Is he trying to buy a death wish for me?.
"I wasn't talking to you", she says looking at him before turning her head to look back at me. "I was talking to her. Now repeat what you said you fat weirdo".
I look down watching my feet as they climb on top one another. I'm scared and sad at the same time. I'm scared because I can't fight back if she strikes and I'm sad because this hurts so much.
A hand's placed on my shoulder so I look up and surprisingly I see Noah walking to us. Is he coming for me? That question is being answered when he grabs Loren's hand and takes her to his car.
The dam in me doesn't immediately breaks because I put a band aid over it. I don't want him to see me cry. The preps retrieve to their cars and I watch Noah drive off first with Loren while the other cars leave after them. Almost like an entourage.
The band aid rips off and I let myself cry. I don't even bother about Hernandez. I don't care if he sees me crying.
His hand leaves my shoulder and I just stand there crying. I let all my tears out and it's like I've been holding it for so long.
It takes a while before I calm down and I'm turning away from Hernandez feeling embarrassed now. I know I said I didn't care but now that I'm in a more calmer state the shame's coming on.
"Uh sorry you had to see that", I say wiping my eyes with the sleeve of my jacket.
"It's okay. I cry too if that makes you feel better", he says and I let out a dry chuckle. He smiles.
"So where'd you live?", He asks picking up his helmet.
"Uh 5th Towson Avenue", I say and he nods handing the helmet to me. I look at him.
"I've only got one", he says, "Now c'mon let me help you get in".
**
After about half an hour of discussing why bikes aren't dangerous. I finally get in. Surprising how my first try wasn't so bad. I get in safely although I thought I'd get in another way. Badly.
"Okay, ready?", He asks.
"Yeah", I say.
"Hold on tight", Hernandez says and the bike comes to life roaring powerfully. Woah adding that to coolest things I've seen in my life list.
He makes a sharp turn and I'm completely caught off guard that I almost fall out of the bike but I don't because I quickly get a hold of his jacket.
"Woah", I say wide eyed.
"Like I said, hold on tight", he says and then drives out of school. I hold on to his jacket tightly. He's going at a pretty high speed and I'm still having this fear that I'll fall off. This is kind of crazy because this is my first time on a bike.
I would like to hold him tighter like the way girls do in movies but that would seem weird so I won't.
The helmet blocked the wind or else I would certainly be feeling like a dog right now. I can tell it's a lot of wind power.
The bike slows down and I realize I'm at my house. I gently get down holding Hernandez, careful not to fall. I take out his helmet and hand it to him.
"Thanks", I say with a smile but then it falls when I see my house a few feet away. So then this isn't my house.. I turn to look at the house behind me. I sigh when I see it's Noah's house.
"Welcome.. you don't look happy to be home though", he says noticing my face.
"Oh no it's fine.. uh bye and um thanks for the ride again", I say and he nods putting on his helmet.
"Catch you later Abby", he says then drives off. Just as I step down the kushner's porch I hear their front door open.
"Abby?", I turn to see Mrs kushner taking a step out of her house.
"Oh hi Mrs kush- I mean Carmen", I say cutting myself mid sentence. She'd be upset if I called her that. She'd say I was being too formal.
She smiles, "Hi Abby. Did you come to give Noah some lessons?", She asks.
"Uh I-
"Good guess", a voice all too familiar to miss says and I look ahead to see Noah opening the door more so we could see him.
"Oh how lovely then I guess you should come in now", Carmen says pulling me by the hand. Wait what?.
"But I-",
"It's okay dear I've got plenty of cookies waiting for you", she says and before I can even blink again I'm inside their house. This is not happening.
**
Noah and I just sit staring at anything but our faces. No one wanted to make the first move to actually speak. But I'm sure we've both got alot of things to say to each other.
My eyes move to the TV in his room. I study the edges, they look pointy and it's surprisingly clean. There's no sight of dust on it. Someone's probably cleaning it. Someone who's not him. My eyes find somewhere else to settle and in the process they land on Noah. Darn it, I was going for the nightstand.
"Uh.. you go first", he says.
"What?",
"I know you have a lot to say right now so just come at me with it", he says and I sigh.
For a moment I want to just forgive him and let everything go but.. a thought crosses my mind. A thought of Hernandez.
Say something.
"You're full of shit", I say without even thinking. Okay maybe I thought about it but you know, it just came out like that.
His eyes widen but he slowly nods, "Wasn't expecting that but okay", he says.
"Look Noah, it's not like I need you to stand up for me whenever I'm being bullied but..", I trail looking down at my fingers, "A true friend wouldn't just stand there and let someone-
"She's my friend too", he cuts me of and I instantly look up.
A scoff. I let out a scoff as I look at Noah with absolute disbelief. How could he call her his friend? Someone who he just casually sleeps with all the time. Does he know what a friend really is?.
"Friend? She's your friend?", I ask pushing the chair back as I get up angrily. "If you think a friend is someone you call to solve your sexual problems then you don't know what a friend is. You spray painted her fucking house and she's your friend!. You're just playing a game of friends with benefits. None of it is real except you're as fake as her", I rant and Noah looks utterly speechless. Like he doesn't believe I'm the one actually saying all this to him. I even used the f word which I never use.
"I'm sorry", he looks confused by my apology, "About what happened this morning. I'm not ashamed of being with you when others are around. I just feel they'd talk shit about you if they saw you with me all the time".
I walk to the door then stop, "And also, if you still think Loren's your friend then I can't be yours because she'll just keep hurting me and you'll stand there doing nothing. I can't have a friend like that", I say then walk out of his room.
I head downstairs quickly making my way to the front door.
"Abby?", I stop shutting my eyes close. She just had to see me didn't she. I turn with the fakest smile on Earth. "Leaving so soon?".
"Uh yeah I'm kinda tired", I say.
"Oh then I guess you're not staying for dinner?", She asks and I shake my head.
"Oh no maybe next time", I say and she nods sadly but then brightens up quickly as she picks up a box of cookies.
"Well then next time but have these cookies", she says with a smile.
They look really tasty but wasn't I trying to loose weight?. I look at the box full of delicious looking cookies. I could eat all of them in an instant.
"Um..".