Uncertain

35-They know

Monday came quickly.

In other words, I slept through the end of the weekend. I didn't leave my room, I didn't even eat, and because every single person inside the Miller household was too busy with their own lives, well, no one even noticed. No one noticed when I literally skipped the whole Sunday. I watched a few movies, I stared at my ceiling, I even opened my math book (just to draw a flower on it), and then fell asleep again.

When I then finally woke up again, more rested than ever, it was Monday and a new week, once again.

I groaned.

I was not ready to go to school and face the looks I was going to get because of the stupid party on Friday. Mostly, I was not ready to face the looks I would get from my new friends because of the words I had said to them. Who was surprised when I lost a chance to have friends once again? Well, not me.

I reached my hand out towards my phone on my little nightstand, but when I tried to turn it on, I realized that I hadn't plugged it in last night and now the battery was dead.

I groaned again.

I pushed the comfort of my blanket off me, and sat up on the bed, staring around the view in my room. No, I did not know where my charger was, but I wouldn't be surprised if Aiden had "borrowed" it again. So, instead of looking at my phone, I looked at the clock on my wall and sighed. Yes, I had to get up or I was going to be late.

I threw a hoodie from my floor over me and stood up, or at least tried to do that completely forgetting that my left foot was still broken, and I couldn't put weight on it. I let out a pile of silent curse words. Not like the day could have a better start than that.

When I survived from that stinging pain on my leg, I grabbed my crutches from the floor and made my way to my bathroom. Practice makes perfect, I guess, because my stumbling wasn't anywhere near as bad as when I first got the crutches on my hands. Although, I still did surrender midway because it was taking a little too long, and just hopped on one leg to the bathroom.

I washed my face with cold, ice cold, water. I brushed my teeth, and put my hair, wig, into two French braids. 

I sighed.

Ugly as hell. My face was a mess, so was my hair. I had dark bags under my eyes even though I had slept better than ever, my face was spotty, and the freckles had some coup going on it. I didn't have the energy to put make up on to hide it, so I just let it be. I, however, did put some mascara on my lashes because that way I didn't look as bald as I did before.

Then I moved to my walk-in closet. I picked an oversized hoodie, and a pair of college pants, and sunk into the warmth. I grabbed my bag from the chair and threw my uncharged phone in there. My crutches I grabbed from my floor and moved downstairs, to the kitchen, where the scent of coffee came from.

Bryson was there.

He was holding his head, as he was trying to focus on the phone in his hands. He looked like he was going through a growing headache, he looked horrible; like he had gone to hell and come back. His eyebags were dark, his hair was a pile of twigs, his white shirt wasn't white anymore, and he had a little cut under his eye.

"You look like shit." I commented from the doorway, making him cringe.

"Don't say shit."

I rolled my eyes and walked next to the counter to pour myself the rest of the coffee, not really knowing if someone was planning on taking it.

I was officially addicted. Not long ago I hated coffee more than anything, now I needed at least one cup of that every day. If I was being totally honest, I still wasn't sure whether I liked the taste that much, but the caffeine was another story. I just simply needed it, or I was going to be moody whole day.

"That's what you get from drinking." I shrugged after a moment, sitting down on the bar stool around the island, just on the other side of my brother.

"Ohh, yeah?" He questioned with a slight chuckle. "Let's think back to Saturday, shall we?"

"No." I shook my head. "What happened?"

"I had a fight with Abby." He answered with a sigh, giving a small kiss on my forehead on his way to get him a glass of water and a painkiller. "Don't worry about it."

"What?" I furrowed my eyebrows. "Why?"

He gave me a look.
"I said don't worry about it."

"But..."

"Lilah." He cut me off. "This is a thing between two adults, not something for you to worry about."

"Fine." I shrugged, crossing my arms over my chest. "But I could help though."

"Sure." Bryson shook his head in amuse. "Sure you could, sweetheart."

He moved to get himself another cup of coffee, instantly cursing because there was not a single drop left of it. He gave a look to me; more like the cup of coffee I had just placed on the counter.

Bryson always drunk his coffee completely black. He said that pouring milk into coffee ruined the whole definition of coffee. This time he, however, just settled for my half-drunk coffee with a lot of milk in it. One reason being: he did not have the energy to make more coffee.

"But you two are not breaking up, right?"

Bryson turned his gaze to me.
"No, of course not."

"Good."

"Why would you think that?" He asked, taking a sip from my coffee. "This is just a little disagreement about few things; nothing big."

"Well, it looks like something big." I shook my head. "You really do look like shit."

He shook his head but didn't say anything.

They had just yesterday been fine; good actually. Engaged, getting married in a few months. Abby and Bryson; they never fought. And now I was there, looking at my brother who looked like a result of a complete war. He was not going to tell me; I knew that. I just really hoped that they were fine, and my brother was telling me the truth.

"Ohh by the way..." Bryson gave me a look. "There are two boys in the living room waiting for you, having a nice talk with Edwin, Jordan and Aiden."

"Two boys?"

"Yeah, the other was..." He placed his hand on his forehead. "Marcus, or Mathias, or something like th..."

"Shit."

For a split second I forgot about my broken leg and tripped on the floor when trying to run. Another curse word escaped my lips, and my brother gave me an 'are you okay' look. My painful death on the floor however did not last long when I remembered why I had been in such a rush in the first place.

Mathias was in our living room. Mathias Gibson. In our living room. And Aiden, Jordan and Edwin being there too.

Yes, indeed that teenager boy was in the living room sitting on the couch with another unfamiliar-looking teenage boy. Right under the burning gaze of the three of my brothers. And oh boy it was an uncomfortable tension. They were all silent, deadly silent. Mathias looked pretty much unbothered by the looks on my brothers' faces, but the other boy was another case. He looked like he wanted to get out of the room as soon as possible, and his eyes kept looking for possible ways of escaping.

"What are you doing?"

All the five pairs of eyes snapped towards my voice.

"Ohh nice, Dahlia is here..." The unfamiliar guy spoke, already standing up. "Shall we go now, huh?"

"It's Delilah." About everyone in the room corrected, giving him a weird look.

"Who are you?" I questioned, before moving my eyes to Mathias. "And what are you doing?"

"I will not tell my name now, because I don't want those three..." The guy pointed at my brothers. "...to haunt me for the rest of my life."

I chuckled.
"Good decision."

"We came to pick you up." Mathias spoke, answering my question.

"No way in hell." Edwin shook his head. "She's not coming with you; you may leave now."

"You came to pick me up?" I furrowed my eyebrows, a smile coming on my face. "Really?"

"No Lil, don't even fucking think about it."

"Shall we go?" I ignored my brother.

Mathias stood up from the couch, and grabbed his car keys from his pocket, making my brother grab them from his hands. Mathias threw his hands in the air and gave him a 'what the hell' look. Edwin just shrugged and put the keys into his pockets.

"What the fuck, dude?" Mathias hissed. "Give my keys back."

"What keys?" Edwin questioned with an innocent smile on his face, before he sat down on the couch in between his twin brother and Jordan. "Do you two know about Matt's keys?"

"No." Jordan shook his head. "He must've lost them."

"Edwin, what the f..." I watched how the three of my oldest brothers walked to the room, probably coming to see what was going on. "...frick."

Charles had just woken up, and he definitely looked like it. He had pajama pants and a t-shirt with a text 'little princess'. Anthony had bought it on his birthday a year ago. His hair was a mess, although it was not even half as bad as Bryson's. He also had an energy drink on his hand, because I had, like said, poured myself the rest of the coffee.

"What the fuck, stop drinking my energy drinks." Aiden commented.

"Sorry, brother." Charles muttered, giving a kiss on my forehead before moving to the couch. "The little princess drank the end of the coffee."

"Okay, nice that now the whole sibling group is in here, but Edwin give me my keys back or..." Mathias started but was cut off when Edwin furrowed his eyebrows.

"Or what?"

Mathias was silent for a moment, trying to come up with something, anything, before his eyes fell on the coffee table. He snatched the black iPhone from it, and threw it in the air, barely catching it.
"Let's see, you wouldn't mind if I broke your phone, would you?"

"Ohh, I would totally mind." Edwin gasped sarcastically, before he grabbed something from his pocket. "I must now call our guard here, from my phone."

"Mathias, that's my phone you idiot." The other teenager in the room facepalmed.

"Well, fuck my life." Mathias passed the phone to him. "I still want my keys back."

"I already said that I don't know where the keys are." Edwin smiled at him. "My apologies, I can't help."

"Edwin, what the fuck!" I snapped, getting an unimpressed look from all of my siblings in the room. "Give those keys back, right now."

"Don't curse." Weston raised his hand up when Edwin was about to speak. "And Edwin, give the keys to the teenage boy."

"Thank you." I nodded, earning a small smile from my oldest brother. "That's why you are my favorite."

Charles furrowed his eyebrows.
"Who are even these two?"

"My friends." I answered, making Edwin roll his eyes.

"She doesn't even know the other one." He spoke. "And the other one is a fucking dickhead."

"Edwin!" I snapped. "Stop it."

"Dickhead or not, give the fucking keys to that child now." Our oldest brother hissed. "You are acting like a three-year-old."

"He's going to drive our little sister to school." Edwin gave him a look.

"And?"

"What?" Every single sibling inside the room, including me, questioned instantly.

"You got to be kidding me." Edwin shook his head. "You are not letting him drive her to school."

"Who said that?" Weston sat down on the couch, placing his legs on the coffee-table. "The last time we checked, I was her guardian, and I was the one making decisions in this household."

"Well, good, now that it's settled." Mathias smiled sweetly at Edwin. "Will you give me my keys, so, I can drive your little sister to school and who knows what will happe..."

Weston cleared his throat, earning a small apology from the teenager.

"You..." Edwin was about to jump up from the couch, but Weston put his arm in front of him to stop him from doing so.

"The keys, please." Our oldest brother spoke again.

"You are a fucking idiot, you know that?" Edwin snapped, but still grabbed the keys from his pocket and put them on Weston's hand.

"Thank you." Mathias spoke, passing his hand towards Weston.

Before my oldest brother placed the keys in his hand he spoke with a low voice-
"If you kill her, I will kill you."

He placed the keys on Mathias' hand.
"C'mon let's go."

"You can go." I spoke. "I'll come in a second."

"Keep your hands away from her." Weston gave the boy one last look. "And no stupid stunts, and do not fucking overspeed with her in the car."

"Yes, yes."

Mathias just shrugged and walked out of the room with the new guy just on his heels, directly under the disgusted looks on the faces of my three brothers on the couch. Aiden rolled his eyes and Jordan just shook his head before they both focused on the TV, but Edwin threw his hands in the air and walked past me out of the living room, whispering something like 'dickhead' on his way.

"You are seriously letting me go with them?" I questioned from my oldest brother after being silent for a moment.

"What?"

"You are seriously letting them drive me?" I asked again.

"Yes." He answered with a chuckle "Do you not want to go with them?"

"No, it's just." I sighed. "Never mind it's stupid."

"Okay." He nodded, shaking his head. "Have fun at school, and don't do any stunts either."

"I won't."

"Good." He nodded, giving a kiss on my forehead. "I love you."

"Love you too."

Uncertain

"Delilah, you okay?"

I looked at the rearview mirror to see the gaze of Mathias, staring at me through it.

We had just got out of our driveway, and we were now speeding through the highway, about ten minutes away from school. Mathias, indeed, was really speeding, but I wasn't even scared about the speed on the speedometer because my moody brothers were always driving like being in a race too.

"Sorry what?"

"I said, you okay?" He asked again. "You look sad."

"Ohh, I'm fine." I smiled a little. "Just tired."

"What happened to your leg?" The other guy asked, looking at the crutches on my left side.

"I fell down the stairs." I colored the truth a little, not wanting to tell how I had basically jumped from the top of the stairs because I did not want my brothers to kill the person who was driving the car at the moment.

"Right." He chuckled before passing his hand towards me through the space between the front seats. "I'm Elliot, by the way."

"Delilah." I smiled, shaking his hand. "Not Dahlia."

"Yeah, sorry about that."

"He's the cousin we were talking about last week." Mathias commented. "My cousin, I mean."

"Ohh, the Hawaii guy."

"That exactly."

Now that I really looked at Elliot, he did look a little like Mathias. He had blond kind of long and wavey hair, but his facial features were almost exactly like Mathias'. The eyes, the smile and the nose were exactly the same. Elliot just had some freckles on his cheeks. You were able to see that he had been in Hawaii, because his skin was totally sun touched. It was suntanned, and you were also able to see the few burnt spots. He was wearing a dark blue t-shirt, and a cap was the wrong way around on his head.

A wide smile was on his face.
"It's nice to get new people into the group, besides I've heard a lot about you."

"Like, how I talked to your best friends in a party, making like every single one of them hate me?" I questioned. "That's great."

"Ohh, about the party." Mathias shared a look with his cousin before he breathed hard. "Lottie kind of thinks that we, you know, did something."

"She what?"

"Well, I mean..." Mathias started after a moment with an awkward chuckle. "We were in a tiny bathroom together, both very drunk, so, I don't exactly blame her for thinking that something happened, especially when she hated you in the first place."

"That helps." I rolled my eyes. "You told her the truth, right?"

Mathias coughed, once again sharing a look with his cousin before he spoke again.
"I was going to, but she slammed their front door into my face before I was able to say anything."

"Well, you called her, right?"

"Yes, and no..." He scratched his forehead. "She doesn't answer my calls."

I placed my hands on my forehead.
"Great, just great."

I thought that I still had a chance to explain to my new friends that the things which I had said were just me being drunk and an idiot. Now, well, now it was a lot harder situation.

Typical me.

I finally got a chance to sit with someone at lunch, or hang out in free time, just a chance to have friends. Friends, who even seemed to be like real friends. Friends, who really gave a shit about me. And I ruined it, again. I had said some stupid things, which I didn't even really think were true.

I appreciated a lot, more than a lot, that someone was as interested about me or cared about me without even really knowing me as Ava. I wanted to be her friend, and she was the nicest girl I had met, after Angel. The sister-in-law law was cute, and she was totally sister material. She was part of my family Robin was one of the funniest and most energizing person I knew. Just being in the same room as her made your day a lot better. Mathias, well, he was Mathias, but he really really cared about his friends, and now that he didn't hate me anymore, he was actually sweet. Charlotte was kind, and a total sweetheart from head to toe. Just thinking about hurting her, made my heart cringe.

"They hate me."

"They don't hate you." Mathias commented, before adding. "They just don't like you at the moment."

Elliot punched his arm.
"Not helping, dude."

"No, but seriously..." Mathias gave me a reassuring look. "Those three girls are the most amazing people I know, and I know them better than anyone else. They will forgive you if you just simply apologize."

"Well, Ava did forgive me already." I murmured.

"I kind of guessed that." Mathias commented. "Charlotte and Robin founded a club called 'Delilah sucks', but Ava didn't go for it like she usually would've done if she had really hated you."

"That sounds like I have a lot of hope." I sighed. "Lord have mercy."

Mathias snickered.

His hand reached to the glove compartment right in front of Elliot, and he grabbed a pack of strawberry wine gums throwing it to me. Then he grabbed a smoke and rolled down his window. Lightening the cigarette, he placed it between his chapped lips. He took a long inhale from it, making both me and Elliot give him a judging look.

"What?" He noticed the lack of joy in our faces. "It's just a smoke, it's not gonna kill me."

"It's doing exactly that."

"Shut up and eat those candies, Lilah." Mathias rolled his eyes, before pointing me a look. "Ava said that you like strawberries."

"I do which is weird because I don't remember telling her." I scratched my forehead. "What are these for, what did I do?"

"When you said that you had cancer, I felt bad for you..." He shrugged. "So, I guess this is a sorry for your cancer present, or something."

"She has cancer?" Elliot gave Mathias a confused look, making me cringe, before he turned to me. "You have cancer?"

If I was being completely honest, I had already forgotten that I had told Mathias about my cancer. And now I wanted to be buried five feet under the ground. Cancer, cancer, cancer; that was my whole identity. For once there were people who didn't know about it, and for them I was also something else. Not just a sick girl. And I would've wanted it to stay that way. I didn't want them to know.

"Yeah, I do."

"Ohh." Elliot fell silent. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." I commented, passing the strawberry wine gums back to Mathias. "And I don't want these, the cancer is not a big deal, forget it."

They both fell silent.

To lower the awkward tension in the car, Mathias turned the volume of the radio up and some basic teenage rap started echoing inside the vehicle. Elliot grabbed the wine gums I didn't want, and started eating them while scrolling through Tik Tok, having the energy drink on his other hand. He didn't have headphones, and the mixture of the short videos and the music blasting through the radio was making my head ache.

"Don't tell the others." I spoke after a moment, making their attention fall back on me. "Ava knows, and you two know, but don't tell the others, please."

Uncertain

When we got to school, the front door of the car was basically ripped open before the vehicle even stopped moving completely.

Both Robin and Ava tackled Elliot into a huge hug, somehow managing to also press the blinker on while doing so. The energy drink on Elliot's hand also fell on the seat, making the whole content of it spread into Mathias' car. Elliot let out a surprised yell, but Mathias, on the other hand, let a pile of curse words escape his mouth-
"What the hell?"

"Oh please." Robin rolled her eyes as she pulled away from the hug. "Don't be dramatic."

"Oh my god." Ava murmured, still having a tight grip on the teenager in front of me. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you too, shithead." Elliot chuckled, kind of pushing Ava away, trying to get some oxygen inside his lungs and also be able to unbuckle himself and get off the car. "Where's Lottie?"

"I'm here." A silent voice spoke.

Charlotte was standing five meters away from the car. She had her arms crossed over her chest, and she had a forced smile on her face. She looked horrible. Her blonde hair was greasy, and she had put it up with a hairclip. Her cheeks were a little puffy, and she was wearing white college pants and a white hoodie. Her eyes were watery, but she wasn't crying. She was staring directly at the driver of the car, Mathias.

"Hey, get in here." Elliot got up from the car and opened his arms. "What are you doing so far away?"

Charlotte shrugged before she started walking towards the car, still having her arms crossed over her chest. She gave a hug to Elliot but ignored Mathias as he tried to speak to her. She didn't even look at him anymore.

I was still sitting in the car.

Ava had noticed me, but none of the others had. And that's why I didn't want to get up. I didn't want to ruin the excitement on Robin's face, I didn't want her and Charlotte to walk away. I tried to be as silent as I could, I tried not to breathe, but Elliot had to ruin it because after pulling away from his and Charlotte's hug he opened the backdoor and gave me a confused look-
"What are you doing?"

That's when the others noticed me too.

Charlotte didn't let out a sound before she quickly turned around and walked away, making Mathias run after her, still trying to get her attention. Robin looked at me for a moment before she gave a look to Ava, and then to Elliot.
"What the hell is she doing in Mathias' car?"

"We picked her up." Elliot answered, passing me a hand to help me out of the car.

I ignored the hand, and got up myself, grabbing my crutches from the other side, before I turned towards Robin and gave her a look.
"I'm sorry."

"Yeah right." She rolled her eyes, before placing a hand on her lips. "Oh I'm sorry, I forgot that you don't like when I speak."

"That's not what I..."

"Robin, she's sorry." Ava cut me off. "She didn't mean what she said."

"I can't believe that you forgave her." Robin shook her head, taking a sip from her every day double shot espresso on her hands. "She said that she doesn't want to be our friend, so let's not be her friend."

"Robin..."

"I'm going now." She continued, giving a questioning look to Ava. "You can come too or then stay with her, your decision."

Robin turned around and started walking away.

Ava turned to me, and she gave me a questioning look, making me just murmur something like 'go'. She smiled at me apologetically before she ran to catch Robin, and both of them walked out of my sight inside the huge building before I was even able to count to ten.

Lord have mercy indeed.

I sighed before I turned back to the car, and reached to grab my backpack but the only teenager left with me grabbed it before I was able to do so. Elliot put my backpack on his back and ignored the questioning and a little annoyed look on my face. He started walking towards the school, walking very slowly, just so I could have a chance to keep up.

"I can carry it." I spoke when I got next to him.

"I know you can." Elliot shrugged. "But you won't."

"It's my bag."

"But it suits me." He gave me a smirk, as I analyzed the light-pink Gucci backpack on his back.

"Fine." I rolled my eyes, before speaking with a silent voice. "Thank you."

"You are very welcome."

He passed the rest of his energy drink to me, which wasn't much because the content was almost fully on Mathias' car seat. It was good though; raspberry was the flavor of it, and it tasted like some juice I had drunk when I was a child.

Elliot walked the whole way from the parking lot to the school with me. It wasn't a long way, but it did take forever because I was basically learning how to walk again. He even waited at the top of the little ten step stairs in front of the school, as I took my whole five-minute time to slowly manage to climb those. That teenager opened the door for me and held it open as I walked through it. He walked to my locker with me, where we also met Mathias.

He hadn't had very much luck with his girlfriend. Apparently, he had even visited the women's bathroom, earning disgusted faces from everyone in there and getting slapped on the cheek by some junior.

"Delilah, please, please, please..." Mathias leaned against the lockers. "You have to talk to her."

"Me?" I gave him a questioning look before I chuckled. "Dude, did you not see how Lottie and Robin both walked away when they saw me?"

"But you are a girl, you have woman blood running through your veins." He whined as he slid down against the locker to the floor. "You know how to handle this, you know about these girly situations."

"I wouldn't be so sure."

"Guys..." Ava's voice echoed through the aisle, as she walked to my locker too, and sat down on the floor next to Mathias. "We have a severe problem."

"What?" Mathias, Elliot and I questioned at the same time.

"Robin refused to talk..." She answered, throwing her hands in the air. "Like ever again, and it's creeping the hell out of me because there is never a silent moment with her and now suddenly all I hear is silence."

"Great." I rolled my eyes, as I slammed my locker closed and slid against the lockers next to Ava and Mathias, on the floor. "This just gets better."

"I went to the ladies' bathroom." Mathias patted Ava's leg. "And Lottie is not talking to me."

"Yep, not talking to me neither." I nodded, also patting Ava's leg. "Life sucks."

Ava nodded, looking first at me and then at Mathias.
"It does."

"C'mon guys, what are you doing?" Elliot, the only one who was still standing on the floor, shook his head. "Get your asses up, and don't be so depressed."

"It's Monday." I commented. "And we have math."

"Too bad, D." Elliot gave me a sweet smile. "Now get up."

Mathias was the first one to collect himself up from the floor and he and Elliot already started walking towards the class, Elliot still having my pink Gucci backpack hanging on his back. Ava was the next one to get up, and she passed her hand to me to help me do that too.

I let her help me.

"I'm sorry Lilah." Ava gave me a sad smile as we started following the guys. "That I went with Robin."

"No, it's okay." I shook my head, stopping her with my hand. "It was good that you went with her."

"I tried to tell her that you didn't mean the words." She shrugged. "I don't know why she doesn't believe me."

"Because I really hurt her."

Uncertain

"I might really need some tutoring in math." I spoke when Ava, Mathias, Elliot and I walked to the break room after our forever lasting math class.

Temporarily I got a permit to sit next to Ava in that classroom. Because of that I did get an unimpressed look from my old neighbor, Finn, but he forgot about me as soon as some new blonde girl took a seat next to him. The others from the old group, well, none of them even gave a look at me, not that I cared. And for once, I even stayed the whole class.

However, turned out that Ava was a total pro at math.

When I had finally got one task done (the easiest one), she was already asking for additional tasks. A shock was written on my face through the whole class when she didn't even have to think about what was going on in the same tasks that I didn't understand a word from. For example, in one task you were supposed to solve someone's height, and I got minus thirty-three kilometers.

It wasn't the right answer.

"In other words..." I gave a sweet look to my friend. "Ava, will you help me, pretty please?"

She chuckled.
"Sure."

Break room was the place where most of the students were hanging out during breaks. There were actually four of them: one for freshmen, one for sophomores, one for juniors and one for seniors. They got better the older grade you got. So, because we were juniors, the break room was very nice, and people usually spent a lot of time there.

When we got to the door, we noticed the two friends of ours sitting on the couch. They noticed us too, and almost instantly both Robin and Charlotte stood up.

"Wait, guys." I closed my eyes. "Can we talk please?"

"No." Charlotte answered, but Robin stayed silent (stupid silent treatment).

"Babe..." Mathias gave her a pleading look, but Lottie ignored it completely.

"You may now continue your nice little new relationship together..." She smiled sweetly. "I won't disturb you."

"What?" I shook my head. "We're not in a relationship."

"Ohh, you just make out in a bathroom, sorry my bad."

"Babe, no one's making out with no one." Mathias sighed, brushing his hand through his hair. "Nothing happened, we were just talking, and I was trying to make her feel better because she told me that she has cancer..."

Silence.

Literally the whole break room full of juniors fell into silence. Mathias had raised his voice, so, it wasn't a surprise that the information echoed to the other side of the room too. And suddenly I was the target of everyone's attention and gazes. It was like a slowed film when Elliot slapped his hand against Mathias' mouth, but it wasn't slow enough because everyone understood.

I had cancer, yay.

No one, except for my old friend group, Aaron, Ava, Mathias and Elliot, inside the school knew about it. And as much as there had been drama between me and my old friends, me and Aaron, none of them had told about my sickness to anyone. That I really do appreciate.

Then there's Mathias, who had once again revealed it to someone, this time just to the whole school.

When I felt how my cheeks got redder and redder, and how my hand started sweating a little, I turned around to walk away. I did not like the tension nor the silence inside the room full of people, and I wanted to get out like, instantly.

"Shit." Escaped Mathias lips. "Delilah, I'm so so so sorry."

"You idiot." Ava punched his arm before she walked next to me and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "C'mon Lilah let's go."

She saw the tiny tear which was about to roll down from my eye in any second and decided that it was a good time to leave.

That, it definitely was.

When we got away from the gazes to the same ladies' bathroom where Mathias had been in the morning, the tear escaped my eye. And a ton of others. It didn't take long until I was on the cold and dirty bathroom floor, looking like someone had died. Overdramatic, if you ask me.

I cried a little because now everyone knew about my cancer. And then a lot more because my leg was broken, and everything was going downhill, again. Then I cried because my best friend had died exactly two months again. I cried because my other best friend, and the person who I had just two months ago kissed, was now like air to me. I cried because Kevin was back, and my 'friends' welcomed him like he had never done anything bad. And then I cried because my mother had died, and I needed her during that time more than ever in my life.

Ava squatted on the floor next to me and wrapped her arms around me so tightly that it was hard to breathe. Or maybe it was just hard to breathe through my sobs, I don't know.
"He didn't mean to, Lilah."

"It's not that." I cried. "It's not that, it's everything..."

"Should I call one of your brothers?" She asked, as she stroked my back, clearly herself being a little shaken up about my state. "Bryson for example, I have his number."

"No..." I shook my head. "I think I want my mum."

She stayed silent but still kept hugging me until the loud sobs had changed into just silent tears.

Then I suddenly pulled away from the hug and just stood up, leaving her on the floor confused. I washed my hands, like I had committed a murder and was now washing blood from my hands, and I wiped my tears. Finally, I looked at Ava and gave her smile like nothing had happened, probably looking like a psycho.

"Lilah..."

"Sorry about that." I commented. "Stupid move, I know."

"Lilah..."

I looked at my fake wristwatch.
"Our class starts in few minutes, let's go or we'll be late."

Some girl walked to the toilet and first her attention fell to my friend sitting on the floor, before she moved her gaze to me, and a sympathetic look filled her face.
"Ohh, I heard about the cancer, I'm sorry Delilah."

Then the door was burst open again, this time Mathias for the second time of the day, along with Elliot for the first time of the day, busting inside. First, they looked at the random girl and gave her a sweet smile, then they looked at me, then to Ava still on the floor, then back to me, and then once again to their friend on the floor.

"Dude, you okay?" Elliot asked from Ava who looked like she had just seen a ghost, which she pretty much had done me being the ghost.

Ava gave him thumbs up.
"Never been better."

"Then why are you on the floor?" Elliot furrowed his eyebrows. "That's nasty, Aves."

Ava got up from the floor with the help of Elliot, and then everyone's attention fell back to me. (Including the random girl's who was still in the bathroom). There they were staring at me, but no one dared to say anything, probably because I looked like a huge mess and at the same time like I had totally lost it.

The random girl moved her head closer to Ava before she whispered.
"What are we staring?"

My three friends gave her a look, making her rush out of the room, without even using the toilet.

"Lilah?" Elliot snapped his fingers in front of my face as he tried to read my gaze. "Are you okay, D?"

A smile fell on my lips, making him take a step back along with the others like they were scared of what I would do.

"Uhm, Lilah..." This time Mathias tried as he gave me a careful look. "I'm so so so sorry."

The same smile.

"Why is this kinda scary?" Elliot whispered loudly, making Ava to punch his arm.

"Babe." Ava started, taking a step towards me and placing a hand on my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." I answered, snapping out of my little daydream, making a girly scream escape the mouth of every one of my three friends inside the room. "I'm fine, are you?"

"She has lost it." Mathias whispered, holding his hand against his heart.

"Matt." Ava gave him a very judging look. "You two go now, I'll come with Lilah in a second."

Uncertain

We never went to class.

Ava got this amazing idea: coffee makes everything feel better. So, she decided that we would have to, no other choice, ditch school and go to Starbucks to get us the best drinks in the whole world. In Ava's case it meant vanilla sweet cream cold brew with an extra pump of vanilla.

That's how we found ourselves walking through the double doors of our school, ready to leave and get some energy inside our bodies. However, we didn't get far before someone cleared their throat behind us and a low raspy voice made both of us freeze on spot.
"Delilah, what are you doing?"

I turned around to look at the man behind, and a sweet smile fell into my face-
"William, what are you doing here?"

William Adair.

"Who?" My friend asked, giving a confused look to the grown-up man with a neat suite on and an earpiece inside his ear. "Some kind of agent, or what?"

William turned his coffee brown eyes towards my friend, and he analyzed her for a moment before turning his gaze back to me.

"Some kind of new bodyguard." I answered to Ava before repeating my question. "Why are you here, William?"

"What does a bodyguard usually do?" The man asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Very funny." I rolled my eyes. "Seriously, why are you here?"

"I'm under strict orders from your oldest brother, no can do." He shrugged. "Now tell me girls, why aren't you in class?"

"We are going to Sta..."

I slapped my hand against Ava's mouth.
"Not your business."

"Then you are going back to class." He spoke pointing the door we had just come through. "And don't try anything because I'm pretty much following your every step."

I grabbed my friend's hand and started running (hopping on one leg as fast as I could) away from William. He rolled his eyes and said something like 'she's running' to the earpiece. However, he did not move, he just watched my pathetic attempt to run away. After an amazing ten-second run I tripped over my leg, once again, and flew to the ground. William rolled his eyes again, this time saying 'and she's down' to the earpiece. My friend next to me just started laughing but stopped instantly as my bodyguard walked next to us and gave her the dirtiest look.
"You okay?"

"Ohh frick you." I mumbled, ignoring the helping hand that he was giving me.

"Delilah Miller, what in the world are you doing?"

And then there were two.

Joe Adler, the other bodyguard, my favorite one. I was able to feel his judging gaze on my back, but I didn't turn around, not when I knew that he wasn't very pleased with me sitting on the ground of a parking lot during class time. He placed his arms under my arms and lifted me up on my feet like I weighted nothing, like I was just a little child throwing a tantrum on the floor.

"You got to be kidding me." I threw my hands in the air. "Not you too."

"Who is he?" My friend whispered to me.

"Another bodyguard." I rolled my eyes. "Joe, he is the og one."

"He's hot." Ava whispered before turning her gaze to William. "Not that he isn't."

"And I'm like fifteen years older than you child." Joe commented, giving my friend a look.

"Let me get this straight..." I started looking between the two bodyguards who were now standing next to each other. "Westie really hired the both of you to watch my every step?"

"Basically." Joe answered. "Now would you please explain what you are doing here during class time?"

"Nope." I said popping the 'p' out.

Joe turned his questioning gaze towards my friend, and I cringed knowing very well that it was a lost case now. If he wanted to, Joe was able to look as intimidating as possible, and now he wanted to look like that. Ava gave me a helpless look before she blurt it out without wasting another second-
"She was sad, then she had a breakdown then she was creepy and then we decided to go to Starbucks, which was not my idea."

Snitch.

Both William and Joe turned their gazes back to me, trying to search for something on my face before they shared a look.

"Okay, I did not have a breakdown." I commented. "It was just a stupid Monday tantrum, bad day, you know?"

"Ohh, it tota..." I punched Ava's arm.

"I would totally appreciate if you didn't mention about this to my brother." I murmured with a low voice.

"If you go back to class now, and you won't try to leave the school again..." Joe gave me a look. "Then fine."

"Thank you."

"And Delilah..." He added when me and my friend were already about to leave.

"Yes?"

Joe sighed-
"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

Uncertain

Even though we never got ourselves Starbucks, we still went to the coffee machine in our school and picked ourselves coffees before going back to class, almost half an hour late. But because we were already so late, we didn't think that being even more late was going to be any worse, so we took all our time gossiping and walking through the whole school.

Our English teacher wasn't very impressed when we got to the class late with coffees on our hands. Our excuse was something like 'we didn't realize how the time passed'. I don't really think that she bought it, but she didn't question us anymore, just told us to sit down.

Throughout the whole class, I was the target of every pair of eyes inside the room. I tried not to focus on that but at some point, it annoyed me so much that I pulled my hood up like I was some kind of celebrity. Gossip spread through a school quickly, and what would've been better gossip than that Delilah Miller had cancer and she was going to die. Note the sarcasm. In other words, everyone knew by now, and I was the hottest topic of the day.

Regardless of the stares, the class did end pretty quickly, partly because I was talking with Ava the whole time.

So, lunch came quickly and as we got to the cafeteria Mathias and Elliot were already sitting there. They were having an intense argument about some hockey teams or something and didn't even first notice how Ava and I sat down at the table. They didn't notice us until Ava cleared her throat.
"Guys."

The two boys looked at us simultaneously.

"Hey." Mathias smiled.

"D, you feeling better?" Elliot asked, taking a chip from Matt's bag of chips.

"Yeah."

"You want?" He passed the bag to me too, earning a 'what the hell' look from Mathias.

"No thanks, I'm good." I shook my head. "Has anyone seen Lottie or Robin?"

The three people around the table shook their heads.

The two girls had just vanished after the breakroom incident. It was completely understandable because they did hate me like it had probably gotten pretty clear. However, some kind of sad feeling washed over me when not even the fact that I was sick didn't make them say anything to me.

"Great." I murmured.

Mathias, Elliot and Ava shared a look, but none of them said anything. We all just started eating our lunches in silence.

I had a chicken salad which I had made for me yesterday. It was absolutely horrible. Not that I was a bad cook or something, but I had somehow managed to burn the chicken. The salad was leathery, the cucumbers were wrinkly, and the tomatoes were green. No, they were not supposed to be green. So, I just simply settled for the piece of bread I got from Ava, and the tiny piece of carrot I got from Elliot.

At least I had a diet coke with me.

Turned out that I didn't have a diet coke with me. I had forgotten it in the fridge when I had been in a rush to save Elliot and Mathias from my brothers.

"You can have mine." Ava commented, seeing the unpleasant look on my face.

"No, it's fine." I shook my head, before standing up. "I'm gonna get some water."

"Wait, I'll get you." Elliot stood up too. "Sit down, you have a broken leg."

"Elliot." I gave him a look. "You sit down."

"Nope!" He shouted already halfway in the water dispenser before I was able to say anything else.

I sat back down with a roll of my eyes.
"Idiot."

Ava and Mathias shared a look before Ava commented.
"Dude, he's helping you."

"I don't need help." I shrugged, snatching a chip from her tray. "I'm like a very normal person, with a normal life, so I'm able to do things myself too. I don't need some special treatment because I have a freaking broken leg, or cancer, or anything else."

"What if he's just trying to be nice?" Ava gave me a look.

Mathias coughed.
"He's not nice."

"Thank you very much cousin." Elliot walked back to the table and placed the water glass in front of me, patting my shoulder. "And I'm helping you because it's not a big deal dude."

"But it's a big deal to me." I threw my hands in the air. "I do not want pitying."

"Fine then." He shrugged before grabbing the glass back to him and taking a sip. "I was getting thirsty anyways."

Mathias rolled his eyes at his cousin's behavior before he passed the rest of his energy drink to me and gave me a look before I was able to resist. I decided to leave it, and just accepted the energy. I didn't like it very much if I was being completely honest, but still gave him thumbs up when he asked if I liked it.

"So..." Elliot started, crossing his arms over his chest. "What's happening this weekend?"

"I think we've all had enough of parties." Mathias commented, making both Ava and I nod. "So, no parties."

"To the beach, then?" Elliot questioned. "It's been a while since we've had a beach night."

"Am I invited too?"

"Duhh." Ava commented, wrapping her arm around my shoulder. "You are our new bestie."

"What about Robin and Lottie?" I gave them a sceptic look. "I don't think that they are coming if I am."

"I don't think that they are coming at all." Mathias commented, taking a bite from his sandwich.

"We are coming, why wouldn't we?"
Lottie's voice made all of us jump a little, and a high-pitched scream escaped Mathias' mouth, again.

Charlotte and Robin were standing behind our table. They were holding their trays which they placed on the table and sat down. Charlotte had her healthy freak nasty green smoothie which contained literally everything green. Robin had her basic coffee shot, which was probably her third of the day. Both of them also had a delicious looking bagel, and they started eating in a total silence, us four still staring them with unsure looks on our faces.

Ava had still her arm around my shoulder and slowly I leaned closer to her, increasing the gap between Robin and Charlotte and me.

"So..." Mathias started, sharing a look with Elliot, Ava and I. "Everything's okay now?"

"Oh no." Charlotte gave her boyfriend a sarcastic look. "I still hate you, but Delilah is fine."

"Dude..." Mathias threw his hands in the air.

"Really?" I questioned at the same time.

"Yeah." She gave me a sad smile. "I can't be angry to someone who has to live with cancer, that would be too cruel of me."

"Ohh..."

"I'm really sorry Delilah, I didn't know." She spoke with a low voice. "I was being a little selfish."

Robin sighed.
"I'm sorry too."

"Ohh..."

I got punched to my side by Ava, who gave me a look.
"She thinks that apology accepted, right Lilah?"

"I..." I shook my head. "No."

"No?"

"No." I repeated. "I won't let you apologize; I won't let you be okay with what I said because I have cancer."

"Seriously." Ava facepalmed. "You had one job."

"Yes, seriously." I gave her a look. "I want nothing more than you two to forgive me and understand how freaking sorry I am. But I don't want you to forgive me just because I'm 'sick'. From now on none of you know about this and none of you will treat me somehow differently, because I'm normal. N-O-R-M-A-L."

"From now on, from now on...and we will come back home, and we will come back home, home again." Elliot started singing, making all of us give him a death stare. "Sorry I had to.

"What I'm saying..." I continued. "Robin, I'm so so so sorry for what I said, and I know that whatever I say, or do, I can't take back my words, but what I can do is to tell you that your energy and positivity literally lights up everyone's day. Maybe somedays you have a little too much energy, but this school wouldn't be even half as funny as it is now if it wasn't for you."

"I know." She swinged her hair to the back.

"And Lottie, I know that this is hard to believe but..." I sighed. "Nothing happened between me and Mathias, we didn't do anything else but talk. So, nobody kissed or did anything else. He was just trying to make me feel better. And I think that you are nice, and I want to be your friend, all of yours. I'm so so sorry."

Charlotte and Robin shared a look before Robin shrugged.
"Apology accepted."

"And not because treating you someway differently..." Charlotte added before turning her head towards her boyfriend. "Apology accepted babe."

"Fucking finally." Mathias opened his arms for Charlotte to give him a hug, and this time she did.

"Okay this might sound a little, I don't know, but just from curiosity..." Robin started, giving me a look. "Is that a wig, orr...?"

Charlotte punched her arm, making her give a 'what' look.

"Yeah, it's a wig." I nodded my head with a sad smile on my face. "I'm actually a ginger head not a brownie."

"It looks real." Robin nodded her head. "I like it."

"Okayyy..." Ava gave her a look. "Let's not talk about this."

"Let's talk about Elliot's Hawaii life!" Robin smashed her hands against the table. "Any girl drama?"

Heyyy

It's me againn :DDD

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