Chapter 62
Song Ran had a long dream, in which there was boundless darkness.
She opened her eyes hard, trying to see something clearly, but there was no light in the world, only the sound of gunshots coming from time to time, sometimes very close, sometimes very far away.
She groped around, trying to run, but she couldn't escape and couldn't find her direction - her feet couldn't touch the ground, and someone was holding her tightly as she ran in the dark.
She knew it was A-Zan.
She heard his breathing, which was rough, urgent, nervous, and fearful; she couldn't see him, and she wanted to touch him, but she couldn't.
She was so panicked that she called him, but she couldn't make a sound.
She obviously didn't exert any force, but she was very tired. Her mind wandered and she passed out.
When consciousness returned, it was still darkness. This time, she heard crying. A Zan's cry.
Lowly, with endless sadness and pain, he said: "Ran Ran, please take me away."
Her heart was broken. She looked for him looking for the voice and wanted to hug him, but she couldn't catch anything. His voice seemed to come from the void and she couldn't touch him.
The cycle begins again and again, endlessly.
She was in such a dream over and over again, struggling hard, but in the end she still couldn't hold on to anything, and eventually lost consciousness in the chaos again and again.
She walked in that dark world for who knows how long, until one day she woke up and her eyes were still dark. But this time, something was different.
She moved her fingers and grabbed the sheets of the hospital bed.
The next second, a strange call came from a Chinese woman: "The patient in Room V3 is awake!"
Immediately afterwards, a bunch of unfamiliar voices came in, all in Chinese. A doctor examined her body and asked her how various parts of her body felt. A nurse pulled her limbs and attached them to metal plates. She couldn't see anything, and she was flustered and frightened: "Where's A-Zan?"
No one knew or cared who A-Zan was. They grabbed her, examined her, and asked her questions. She couldn't break free and was pressed on the bed. A nurse said: "You need to replace the canthus membrane, but there is currently a queue for canthus donation, and you may have to wait for more than a month. Don't panic. We have notified your mother, and she will be there soon." Come here."
Just as he was talking, a familiar voice came: "Ran Ran?"
It's He Shanran.
Song Ran was startled, knowing that he had returned to the Imperial City.
The doctor communicated with He Shanran, but she didn't listen to a word. Not long after, the ward became quiet, and only He Shanran was left.
He sat on the edge of the bed, held her thin arm through the sleeves, and comforted: "Don't be afraid Ranran, you have returned to China, it is safe. Don't worry about your eyes, wait for the canthus..."
"Where's A-Zan?" She followed the sound and turned to look at him, her eyes unfocused and her pupils dark, "Where's Li Zan?"
He Shanran smiled: "He is still in Dongguo. He won't be back for another month."
She was startled and asked, "How long have I been asleep?"
"Not long after, I fell into a coma for two or three days."
"Why...it seems like a long time has passed?"
"Everyone who is in a coma will feel this way."
"It's February now?"
"Yes. February 10th."
She murmured: "Why isn't it cold in February?"
"You forgot, this is the north. There is heating in the house."
The ward door opened.
"Ran Ran!" Ran Yuwei's voice came.
"Mom..." Song Ran's nose suddenly became sore and she hurriedly reached out to her. The next second, Ran Yuwei took her into her arms and held her tightly.
"You scared me to death." There was a rare trembling and choking in Ran Yuwei's voice, "Ran Ran, you scared mom to death!"
He Shanran said that although the bullet hit her throat, it missed. When the bullet grazed her mandible, she fainted from the pain and went into shock due to excessive blood loss. After the rescue, I was in a coma for two or three days before waking up.
Only two or three days?
Song Ran felt that the wound didn't hurt at all. She tried to reach out and touch it, but she could only touch the gauze wrapped around it.
She couldn't feel it clearly through the gauze, and while she was still touching it, Ran Yuwei said suddenly, "A-Zan called you this morning."
She dropped her hand and raised her eyes, without any light in them: "Did you receive the call?"
"I have been holding your cell phone. He said that he has to carry out a relatively large task and may not be able to contact you for the next month. But when the task is completed, he will return to China."
"Really?"
"Yes. I was afraid that he would be worried, so I told him that you were recovering well and the canthus of your eye was almost recovered."
"oh."
"So you recuperate first, and when you've recovered your health, you can replace your eyes. He'll be back just in time, okay?"
Song Ran let out a sigh of relief and said, "Okay. Have you told him to pay attention to safety?"
"said."
"That's good."
She didn't talk for long, she got a little tired and said she wanted to sleep.
He Shanran told her to rest and left first; Ran Yuwei followed her out to inquire about Song Ran's condition.
Song Ran was lying on the bed, hearing the sound of them closing the door, and slowly opened her eyes.
It was pitch black in front of me.
She heard that they were completely gone in the corridor. She slowly sat up and groped her way out of bed. She touched the wall in the dark and moved forward bit by bit. He touched the sofa, cabinets, and corners along the wall, and finally touched the window sill.
She bent her knees slightly, probed down with her fingers, and touched the cold radiator.
She felt a chill in her heart. She hurriedly opened the window and touched it. There was clearly warmth on the glass. She groped quickly along the edge of the window with her fingers, finally found the switch, and yanked open the window.
The warm wind and sunshine rushed in.
She stood in the direct sunlight, her heart feeling cold. This weather is at least the end of May.
She has been in a coma for three or four months, and Li Zan has not come back.
......
Another month later, Song Ran finally got the corneal membrane and completed the surgery.
The operation was successful. When she opened her eyes, she saw He Shanran's smiling face.
Song Ran stared at him blankly, unable to laugh.
Ran Yuwei asked: "Ran Ran, how are your eyes? Are you feeling uncomfortable?"
Song Ran looked at her and said, "Can I be discharged from the hospital?"
Ran Yu was stunned for a moment, looking at her daughter's eyes, she suddenly understood. Couldn't fool her.
In the month since she woke up, she seemed to have lost track of time. She didn't want to go out or talk. She slept in darkness every day and didn't ask about Li Zan. In fact, she already knew it. It's just that she doesn't want to ask, she wants to verify it herself.
He Shanran said: "Stay in the hospital for a few days for observation. If there is no problem, you can be discharged. I will prescribe some medicine for you."
"Thank you, doctor." Song Ran said.
She immediately checked the war situation in Dongguo.
Four or five months have passed, and Cangdi has finally recovered.
Since then, government forces have recovered 83% of the country's territory, and the country has begun to rebuild. The rebel army was struggling to survive, and the terrorist organizations also suffered a huge blow and were weakened, forcing them to retreat to the northern border.
On the first day after being discharged from the hospital, Song Ran got on the plane to Jiangcheng.
When Luo Zhan saw her, he was surprised, surprised, and mixed with almost imperceptible nervousness and shame, and asked: "Are you feeling well?"
"No problem." Song Ran smiled, "Political Commissar, I'm here to see A-Zan."
Although Luo Zhan had expected it, he couldn't face her for a while: "Your mother... didn't tell you?"
"I told you." Song Ran said, "My mother said that A Zan is missing."
Luo Zhan slowly sat on the chair, lowered his head, and scratched his hair: "Song Ran, there are some specific things you don't know..."
"I know." She interrupted him softly, "Are you going to tell me that A-Zan violated the regulations and ran out to become a mercenary? Political Commissar, I don't believe it. I know that A-Zan went on a mission. He failed to come back. Do you even think that he failed in his mission? You don't want him anymore, don't you care about him? You don't even look for him and let him fend for himself, right? Political Commissar, you can't do this, you can't do this."
"Song Ran, we looked for him, but we couldn't find him." Luo Zhan was heartbroken, "He disappeared from that day five months ago."
"What does it mean to disappear? How could a living person disappear?" Song Ran choked, took a breath, and said, "If you want to see a person alive, you will see a corpse if you die. Even if he is dead, you still want to see his body." Return the body to me."
Luo Zhan's eyes were slightly wet, he covered them with his hands and supported his forehead: "Song Ran, A-Zan is my favorite subordinate. It can be said that I have watched him grow up. We said we don't care in name, but made a lot of efforts in private. Your mother probably doesn't know what happened that day, let me tell you. That day, you were taken back to the stronghold by terrorists. A-Zan broke in to save you alone and killed forty or fifty terrorists. But he did not come out. The terrorists They abandoned the stronghold that night, and when they left, they mixed their dead with the kidnapped dead, crushed them to pieces, and burned them. The video was blocked after it was released, but I have it here. Do you want to see it now?"
Song Ran's face lost all color, but he still said stubbornly: "If the body is not found, it cannot be proved that A Zan is dead."
"The conditions in the Eastern Kingdom are poor, and there is no way to analyze the destroyed corpses. If there is no A-Zan inside, it is unlikely that he is alive."
After listening to this, Song Ran slowly stood up from his chair and said, "Commissar, I'll leave first."
"Song Ran, Ah Zan may really be dead, and he has been dead for a long time. It has been almost half a year, and he may have turned into bones."
Song Ran's back was thin and thin. After lying on the hospital bed for half a year, she now looks like a piece of paper.
She didn't look back, and said in a very light tone, "Then I'll go pick up his bones. He doesn't want to stay in Dongguo. He told me that he wanted to go home."
Song Ran bought a ticket for the next day to go to Gamma.
She was too tired from the ten-hour flight. When I fell asleep, I dreamed of A-Zan in such a short dream.
Her eyes were obviously healed, but it was still dark in her dream. She couldn't see A-Zan's face or touch his body. Only his low cry.
What does such a dream mean?
Like some kind of bad omen.
It was as if he had really gone to a dark and quiet place.
Is it underground?
Song Ran was heartbroken, and when she woke up, there were two lines of tears on her cheeks.
The landing time is three o'clock in the afternoon on July 1st. The temperature in Gamma was over forty-three degrees.
As soon as Song Ran left the airport, she was dazzled by the dazzling sunshine. The high temperature was steaming, and she was covered in hot sweat in a second. Even the wind blows from the stove.
There were no motorcycles outside the airport, and they were replaced by regular taxis.
She took the car to the hotel. Outside the car window, most of the buildings that were bombed last year have been rebuilt. Even the damaged Alexander Palace is being repaired by cultural relic restoration experts from various countries with the help of UNESCO.
The streets are full of people and cars, and there are many shops, giving it a hint of prosperity.
She was still looking at it, and the driver asked enthusiastically: "Madam, this shouldn't be your first time coming to Gamma, right?"
"I've been here many times," she said. "The last time was in December last year."
"No wonder you are surprised. Our cities are being rebuilt and our lives are continuing. Shopping malls and office buildings have long been operating normally." The driver was very proud. "This is true in many cities. We have recovered 83% of the country."
Song Ran turned to look at him and said, "Congratulations."
"This is certainly worth celebrating. Although the war is not over yet, many cities have restored peace. For us ordinary people, peace is the best thing in the world."
Song Ran accidentally glanced and saw half of his prosthetic leg.
The driver noticed her gaze, shrugged and said with a smile: "Dedicated to the country."
Song Ran's eyes softened and asked, "Have you ever been a soldier?"
"Yes. The defense of Candi lasted for a month. This leg was left there."
Song Ran's heart tightened: "Cang Di? When?"
"From March to April."
She didn't speak for a while.
"Have you been to Cangdi?"
Song Ran nodded and asked, "Have you seen the Cook soldiers?"
"Of course I have. I have seen them many times. They are really good at fighting." The driver talked endlessly about the Cook soldiers, his big eyes shining brightly. "If it weren't for them, the terrorists would not have been dispersed so early. Dong The people of our country are forever grateful to them."
"Have you ever seen an Asian Cook soldier?"
"Never seen one." The driver scratched his head regretfully, "There are too few Asians, only about a dozen, oh, they are all Chinese. But I haven't seen any of them. I heard there is an Asian blast/ The bomb disposal soldier is very powerful. He has eliminated thousands of terrorists. This is equivalent to saving tens of thousands of civilians. Unfortunately, I have never seen him and don't know what he looks like. I only know that he is Chinese. Madam, Are you Chinese?"
"Yes." Song Ran nodded vaguely, "I am the same as him."
"I love you." The driver said enthusiastically.
Song Ran stopped talking and looked out the window quietly.
She didn't want to talk about him to strangers anymore.
It hurts.
When Song Ran came over this time, he finally got help from Luo Zhan. As soon as she arrived at the hotel, she met Major Harvey from the Eastern War Affairs Committee.
Major Harvey is in his thirties, tall and strong, wearing a military uniform and waiting in the hotel lobby.
As soon as he saw Song Ran, he stood up and stepped forward to salute her with a military salute, then bowed deeply and said, "Ms. Song, I am very sorry for your loss."
Song Ran smiled slightly: "I don't think I lost him."
Major Harvey was stunned for a moment, looked at her with more respect, and said, "I will be responsible for and accompany you throughout your trip in Dongguo. If you need any help along the way, please feel free to tell me."
Song Ran said: "I only have one demand, which is to find him and take him home."
Major Harvey told Song Ran more details.
That night five months ago, the extremist organization deployed a large number of troops to attack the hospital, intending to kill all the wounded and fighting Cook soldiers. But the Cook soldiers who finally came to the rescue blocked the attack. Building No. 2 of the inpatient department was successfully rescued, but the fighting was tragic that night, and the Cook soldiers also suffered casualties.
The situation was critical at that time. When Li Zan chased to Cangdi Temple alone, his teammates were unable to support him. Only Benjamin rushed over and met Song Ran who was hung down by a rope under the back wall of Cangdi Temple.
"The helmet and body armor you are wearing belong to Captain Lee." Major Harvey said, "This means that he does not have any protective gear. You were not thrown down, but put down. He was afraid of hurting you. Benjamin After catching you, I wanted to wait for Li Zan, but he cut the rope."
Song Ran's face was pale and expressionless.
"Benjamin thought you were dead, but he discovered there was still a heartbeat on the way. When the kidnapper fired, Captain Li's bullet hit his arm. Perhaps because of this reason, he missed the target.
After the hospital battle, Morgan and the others rushed to Cangdi Temple, but there was no living person in the temple. They suffered heavy losses and abandoned the Cangdi Temple stronghold. Piles of mutilated corpses were burned.
There were hundreds of people, all mixed together, making it difficult to tell them apart. After that, no one saw Li Zan again. Over the past few months, we have tried to pry information out of captured terrorists. But no one knows which stronghold the group of people left from Cangdi Temple fled to, and no useful clues have been found. In the past six months, we have watched the videos of every public treatment of prisoners, and we have also found the locations where they handled them privately. But most of the bodies cannot be identified..."
Song Ran paused for a long time and asked, "Where are A-Zan's comrades?"
"When the service period expired in March, they were disbanded and returned to their respective countries. Only..." Harvey looked unbearable.
"Only what?"
"George and Benjamin are dead."
Song Ran was startled. In such a hot weather, she shivered all over: "How could that be?"
"That night in the hospital, two Cook soldiers died. One was George and the other you don't know."
"What about Benjamin?"
"After the service was completed and disbanded, he did not return to the country and continued to join other squads. One time, for unknown reasons, he acted without permission and was captured." Harvey paused at this point and said, "He was tortured to death."
"The video was posted online but was deleted because it was too bloody."
"Since then, other teammates in the team have also lost contact. Some time ago, the war committee tried to contact them to discuss the award of national medals after the victory of the war, but no one could get in touch. The only one who found Kevin responded to the email It was his family members who said that he suffered from severe post-traumatic stress disorder both physically and mentally, his mental condition was very bad, and he had even committed suicide several times. He refused to come to Dongguo again, and told his family members that he hoped we would never contact him again. "After Harvey finished speaking, he was silent for a long time and said sadly, "They are the best team among all the Cook soldiers, and they have cleared countless strongholds of terrorist organizations."
Song Ran didn't speak for a long time, looking at the void with distracted eyes. She saw a bus stop outside the hotel, and college students holding textbooks got off the bus talking and laughing. The sun was very dazzling, and she suddenly saw a group of boys in their early twenties stripping down to their underpants in a mountain stream, playing and catching fish in the water.
"After you have rested, I will accompany you to Cangdi to see if I can find any clues about him." Harvey lowered his eyes, not daring to look directly at her, "Captain Li is our hero. We can't find him. We are also very ashamed of his whereabouts."
"I can leave tomorrow." Song Ran said, "However, I may need to take a rest now."
Her food and accommodation have been arranged. Harvey made an appointment with her for departure the next day, and comforted her for a while before leaving.
Song Ran returned to the room, feeling exhausted and weak.
She lay down on the bed, breathing in and out slowly. She was tired, but it was still early and she couldn't sleep. I don't want to close my eyes and fall into darkness.
She stared at the ceiling in a daze. In fact, I didn't dare to think deeply about the outcome of this trip. She didn't even dare to ask her own heart, she didn't even dare to ask herself whether A-Zan was alive or already...
She didn't want to and didn't want to think about it. She just wanted to find him, even if she traveled all over Dongguo.
Until now, it seemed that this was the only thing that meant anything to her.
She couldn't even experience the slightest joy from the improved situation in Dongguo.
How ironic.
Does this mean that maybe great love is just an illusion? And people are selfish after all, and only the individual's own pain is the most heart-wrenching?
Song Ran walked onto the balcony and looked at Gama City under the sun.
Half reconstruction, half trauma.
She saw that across the street, opposite was Gamma University of Technology.
The campus is full of trees, young students are coming and going, and it is full of life.
Song Ran suddenly thought of Saxin and she wanted to see him. Saxin met Li Zan. In the East Kingdom, he was the only person left who shared the same memory of Li Zan with her.
Now that the war is coming to an end, he should have returned to study long ago.
Song Ran sent a message to Saxin while going downstairs, wondering whether he could see the Twitter in time. It doesn't matter, she remembers Sasin's last name, she can just go to the campus and ask about it.
Walking into the Polytechnic University campus, a group of young college students wearing white shirts passed by. The men and women were holding textbooks and discussing study issues intensely.
Song Ran only understood xy and αβ.
The bombed teaching building in the distance has been repaired. There are lush trees on both sides of the avenue. There are a few newly planted small trees among the big trees. It is believed that the original trees were damaged in the war.
Birds were chirping in the treetops, and Song Ran suddenly remembered the story of the little bird and the big tree.
At that time, Li Zan said this was a love story.
At the end of the story, the bird found the big tree.
Song Ran looked at the tree, took a breath, looked down, and found a new small square on the right side of the main road. In the center lies a huge black rectangular stone monument. The stele is not high, but wide and long.
The edges around the stele were filled with flowers. A fire burned in the clearing, and the flames danced.
Song Ran walked over and saw a line of golden Dongguo characters engraved on the top of the black stone tablet. She couldn't understand it, but she instantly guessed the meaning of the line of characters - to the students of the Polytechnic University who sacrificed their lives for the country in the war. . Because the four sides of the stele are covered with black and white portraits of young people, and their birth and death years are engraved under each portrait.
Song Ran walked to the stone tablet and looked down the young and lively smiling faces until she found the eleventh figure in the third row. She suddenly stopped, as if her heart was being torn open with a knife--
Sasin's black and white smiling face was fixed on the stone wall.
That was probably a photo of him when he first entered school. A boy of seventeen or eighteen years old, with a green and shy smile, and big eyes shining like stars.
The year of birth and death is engraved under the photo. He died at the age of 20 years, 9 months and 13 days.
Song Ran reached out and touched his face. The black marble was hard and cold, and her vision was blurred in the water light for a moment. In the black and white photo, his smiling face was blurred as if exposed to sunlight.
She pressed her fingers on his face, supported the marble wall, and bent down slowly and deeply. Panting heavily, she straightened up and looked at him again, then suddenly fell to her knees, lying on the stone monument, and started crying.