*Hey, everyone. Apologies for not posting a new chapter since May. I'll try to write the next chapter a bit faster than last time, but for now, I hope you enjoy Chapter 4. It's mainly an adaptation of Episode 3 from the original Urusei Yatsura anime, "The Coming of Rei the Handsome Shapechanger!"
Also, I had a new cover page be drawn by one of my readers, Luk2002. He's a really talented artist, so I hope you check out his work on DeviantArt when you get the chance. Some of it is actually fanart for this crossover. https://www.deviantart.com/lukcast2002.
Upon arriving back at Fire Mountain, Chi-Chi wouldn't come out of her room for hours. She was simply too distraught by what happened at her and Goku's wedding to do anything, let alone talk things over with her father. The poor girl couldn't even bear to take off her mother's wedding dress.
This was supposed to be the happiest day of her entire life, yet it somehow became the complete opposite.
And it was all because of her.
Just thinking of Lum's smug, doe-eyed expression made the princess seethe with unbridled rage. She tightly crushed her bouquet of flowers and growled under breath.
"Errgh! That no-good hussy will get what's coming to her. I swear it!"
She then heard a gentle knock on the door, causing her to sigh and calm down.
"You don't have to keep checking up on me, Dad. I told you I'm alright."
Ox-King opened the door and walked in. He looked upon his daughter in sadness, knowing full well that she was not, in fact, alright.
He sat next to Chi-Chi on the bed and softly rubbed her back.
"Can we just talk about it? I know losing your chance with Goku like that was—"
"I did NOT lose Goku to that obnoxious, pea-brained, condescending...ergh... bimbo, Daddy! She only made him reconsider his promise to me. That's all!"
She crossed her arms and looked away indignantly.
"Okay... let me rephrase that. I know that Goku's... erm... 'promise' to you was important. You don't have to hide that from me." Ox-King replied. He then lightly chuckled in an attempt to cheer her up. "I mean, c'mon now! I'm your dear old dad. You can tell me anything, right?"
Chi-Chi started to tremble a little. She was struggling to maintain her tough façade for much longer.
"Right?"
A few stray tears fell from the young girl's eyes as she clung onto her father for dear life. She then started to cry, much to Ox-King chagrin and slight relief.
"Why?! Why did Lum have to show up on my wedding day of all things?! If it weren't for her and that hideous-looking bald dwarf, Goku and I could have... could have been..."
Ox-King buried her face into his chest and said, "Shh. I know, Chi-Chi. It wasn't fair what happened earlier. Believe me, I was just as upset as you were. But, look on the bright side..."
"What bright side?" The girl grumbled in reply. Her firm pout was the splitting image of her mother's in that moment.
"You actually have a chance to hang out with Goku and get to know him as a person. I mean, apart from that one "date" you had with each other and a few short, yet sweet moments after that, you really didn't spend much time with the guy."
Chi-Chi rolled her eyes. "I'm well aware, Dad. I told Goku that myself, remember? It still doesn't make what happened any less painful. He's the man I love and nothing's going to change that, not even some alien cow with green hair."
Ox-King nervously scratched the back of his head. He needed to phrase his words with a bit more tact this time.
"Exactly right. That's why you shouldn't be giving up so easily. You still have a chance to beat Lum at her own game and win Goku's heart all for yourself." He exclaimed. "After all, Lum has even less of an attachment to Goku than you do. You already have the home team advantage, sweetie!"
Chi-Chi wiped her black eyes and smiled.
"You really think so?"
"Of course! The great Ox-King didn't raise a quitter now, did he?" The former martial artist asked.
Chi-Chi tightly balled her fists and beamed with newfound confidence. She was officially back to her old self again.
"No, you didn't." She murmured. She then leapt up and gave her father an affectionate kiss on the cheek. "Thanks, Daddy."
"Don't mention it." Ox-King chuckled. "Now, go get some sleep. You'll need to be well-rested for your meeting with Goku tomorrow."
"Right."
She wasn't initially planning to visit Goku again so soon, but given how determined Lum was to spend every waking moment with him, desperate times called for desperate measures. Wearing her martial arts gi would also make a potential altercation with the Oni less one-sided, at least. Fighting in a wedding dress just wouldn't go well at all.
Although, she did find the dress somewhat comfortable and soothing in a way. Wearing it felt as if her mother, Ox-King's wife, was there watching over her.
"Do you mind if I still keep Mom's dress on? Just for tonight?" Chi-Chi asked.
Hearing this was starting to make Ox-King a little emotional himself. He held back his own bittersweet tears and shuffled over to the bedroom door.
"Sure, honey. That's fine with me." He whispered. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
After Ox-King shut the door behind him and left, Chi-Chi tucked herself under the covers of her bed and looked up at the ceiling. She held both hands above her chest, frowning.
"Don't worry, Goku. I won't be giving up on you anytime soon. Lum won't get between us for too long."
The princess of Fire Mountain then quickly rested her head on the pillow and fell asleep. Thankfully, due to her father's little peptalk, she wouldn't be crying herself to sleep as planned.
She, on the contrary, had a lot to be happy about.
Within Lum's UFO...
Lum's spaceship was circular in design with metallic pink modules and multiple, rather large computer screens. There were also a few different knobs, keyboards, and switches that activated the UFO's various functions, some of which included near-instant teleportation and the projection of yellow lightning bolts.
On the floor, there was also a fur rug that was made from some type of extraterrestrial tiger or similar creature. It, obviously, matched both Ten and Lum's respective outfits in terms of design.
Lum herself was laying atop this rug and watching one of the ship's monitors. It displayed Goku as he innocently snored away in his bed at Capsule Corp. Much to her perverse delight, he wasn't wearing his gi at this time of night.
Hearing her girlishly swoon and giggle at Goku's muscular body was starting to get on Ten's nerves. He floated in front of the screen to get his cousin's attention.
"Don't you think this is a little creepy, Lum?"
The Oni princess blinked a few times in confusion. It was like she just woke up from a vivid trance of some kind.
"How so? Is it creepy to admire how handsome and strong my Darling is?"
Ten peered at the screen. A little bit of drool was coming out of Goku's mouth as he tossed and turned in his sleep.
"When he's sleeping like that, yes. Yes, it is."
Lum just smiled and patted him on the head.
"Aw, don't be silly, Ten. I'm sure you'll understand it better when you're older." She giggled. "The attraction between a man and a woman is a very complex feeling."
Ten swatted her hand away and puffed up his chest.
"Hmph! I understand it just fine." The young Oni grumbled. "I just don't get how he's so strong. My fire didn't even leave so much as a scratch on him."
Lum rested a hand on her chin in concern. She had a feeling Goku's alien origins would come up in conversation at some point.
"Well, I was actually meaning to talk to you about that. Although he may look human, I believe Darling might actually be... a Saiyan."
Ten's skin noticeably paled. He turned his head from the image of Goku to Lum in quick succession, unable to comprehend what was just said to him.
"A-A Saiyan?! A-Are you sure about that? I thought those monkey-tailed bullies were all wiped out by some big asteroid."
She nodded. "Well, a majority of them were wiped out, yes, but a few survivors have been known to still exist. And I'm afraid that Goku is likely one of them. He once had a monkey tail as a kid, transformed under the full moon, and even has their monstrous appetite. All signs point to him being a Saiyan, rather than an Earthling like he believes."
The younger Oni gulped. He floated next to Lum and got a better look at Goku's physical appearance. The black spiky hair checked out, of course, but his attitude clearly did not.
"But that's so... weird, Lum. Aren't the Saiyans usually violent barbarians who take anything that doesn't belong to them by force? Goku's not like that at all."
"You're right. He isn't." She said with a warm, affectionate smile on her face. "He still loves to fight like any other Saiyan, yet has the kindness and carefree attitude passed down to him by his grandpa. I can't help, but be grateful for that..."
"Guess so. Maybe his experiences on Earth made him less hostile and aggressive than usual?"
"Could be. He is friends with a lot of good people here... and Chi-Chi." Lum grumbled under her breath. The less said about her new rival, the better. "That's why I need you to promise me something, Ten."
He tilted his head to the side in curiosity. "Promise what?"
The princess held out her pinky finger in front of Ten's face.
"Promise me that you won't mention anything about the Saiyans to Darling. Someone as innocent and sweet as him doesn't need to know about the pain his species caused. Especially since... he likely killed his own grandfather through transforming into a Great Ape..."
Ten's eyes widened to their maximum capacity. He didn't see that coming at all.
"What?! During a full moon?"
Lum rubbed one of her arms sympathetically. "Yes. He has no idea it happened either. I'm assuming Bulma and the others do, but not him."
"Yeesh. Poor guy." Ten winced. He then smiled and stuck out his own pinky. "Fine then. I'll be a good boy and promise to keep it a secret from Goku. You can trust me."
Afterwards, they officially crossed their pinkies together, giving Lum a slight, albeit short, sense of relief.
"Thank you so much, Ten."
"Anything for you, Lum. Hehe." He chuckled while jerking a thumb over at the still-active computer screen. "Now, we can let the big lug sleep in peace and call it a night? I'm looking forward to seeing Bulma and her pretty mom again."
Lum shook her head and sighed. "Of course, you are..."
"Hey! They were just really nice ladies, Lum! That's all I meant by that!" Ten cried as a little bit of fire shot out his mouth.
"Sure, sure. Whatever you say."
She levitated over to the computer and got one last look at Goku's sleeping form. She was really looking forward to the day they could share the same bed together. For now, however, she needed to bide her time and wait that moment to transpire.
Lum rested a hand over her Goku's face and blew a kiss at him.
"See you in the morning, Darling."
The monitor then shut off as the two Onis got into their sleeping positions and called it a night. Little did they know, the next day was sure to be more chaotic and eventful than they'd ever expect it to be.
And that would all result from a certain orange spacecraft preparing to land on Earth within a few hours or so.
The next morning...
Back at Capsule Corp, no one, apart from some of the employees, had woken up yet. Only the muffled sounds of Goku's loud snoring could be heard amongst the mostly quiet, peaceful building. This silence, however, was interrupted by a series of loud knocks at the front door.
They continued to become louder and more incessant as time progressed. It became so irksome, in fact, that Bulma just barely managed to force herself out of bed and walk over to it.
"I'm coming, I'm coming..." She grumbled. She was wearing a violet nightgown and slippers that somewhat complimented her hair. "I swear if that's Yamcha, I'm going to give that idiot a piece of my mind..."
Bulma opened the door to see someone even more annoying than her unreliable boyfriend. It was the bald priest from yesterday, Cherry. For some reason, he was covered in faint scorch marks and was wearing slightly tattered clothing.
He politely bowed in front of her and said, "Good morning to you, Miss. I wish to speak with you about some bad luck that may befall your—"
She proceeded to slam the door in his face and walk back to her room. She was not in the mood to deal with that priest's antics mood right now, or any other point. If anything, she'd prefer to never see his odd-looking face ever again.
Unfortunately, fate had other plans. He just continued knocking on the door again until she'd hear him out.
Bulma pinched the bridge of her nose and swung the door back open.
"What part of 'drop dead' did you not understand?"
"I'm afraid it'll take a lot more than a simple kick to keep me away, Ms. Bulma. As I mentioned before, I am drawn to the forces of evil and bad luck in this world. That's why I cannot leave your family and residence unattended." Cherry said. "Misfortune is sure to come wherever your friend, Son Goku, goes, I fear."
Bulma leaned against the side of the door and crossed her arms.
"Goku? What does any of this have to do with him?"
Cherry blankly stared at the girl with squinted, half-lidded eyes.
"If you let me inside, I'll explain everything to you, him, and your parents."
The young inventor looked outside in clear reluctance. She could tell it was going to storm anytime soon, so, although tempting, it wouldn't be right to kick this guy to the curb so suddenly.
"You're not gonna leave until I say yes, aren't you?"
"What do you think?"
They awkwardly stared each other down until Bulma caved in and motioned for him to come inside.
"You better make this quick."
"That is dependent on our respective fates, dear girl."
"Whatever." She snorted in reply. "Wake up, guys! We have a... ugh... guest who wants to tell us something."
Within the span of a few moments, Dr. Brief, Panchy, and Goku all entered the kitchen. The latter was wearing his orange martial arts gi once more.
"A guest? Did they bring some food? I'm starving!"
Bulma rolled her eyes. "No, Goku. He didn't bring any food. We'll have some breakfast after we're done here."
The spiky-haired man frowned. "Guess I can wait a little bit then."
Panchy soothingly patted him on the shoulder and smiled.
"No need to worry, dear! I'll cook up something right in a jiffy!"
"Aw, right! Thanks, Mrs. Brief!" He beamed.
While Panchy started making some food in the kitchen, Goku took a look at Bulma's aforementioned 'guest'. He recognized his face almost immediately.
"Wait, isn't that the one bald dude who interrupted my and Chi-Chi's wedding yesterday?"
"Unfortunately." Bulma glowered.
Cherry crossed his legs and sat down on the floor. Dr. Brief, meanwhile, took a seat and started reading from his newspaper without much interest in what was going on.
"Allow me to properly introduce myself. My name is Sakuramboo, a high priest."
Bulma thought the name was just as ugly as the man himself.
"Hmph. More like a deranged priest..."
"That is what my name means, yes, but I prefer to be called Cherry, Miss. Please do keep that in mind."
"Well, 'Cherry', do you mind telling us what exactly is going to happen with Goku?" The blue-haired girl asked impatiently.
Goku pointed at himself in surprise.
"Huh? This has something to do with me?"
"Correct. Your body is susceptible to possession by evil spirits." Cherry affirmed.
"Evil spirits? Are they pretty strong?"
"Possibly. If you don't heed my warnings, Son Goku, they'll be able to take over you like some kind of malevolent parasite or, worse, an invader."
Goku stroked his chin in thought. He couldn't really understand what the dwarfish priest was referring to.
"Not sure what malevolent means, but I don't think I've met something like that yet. Do you know what these evil spirit thingies look like?"
Suddenly, a bolt of lightning struck through the ceiling and caused Lum to materialize within the building. She was accompanied by Ten, who didn't exactly look all that awake, but was still somewhat up and about, nonetheless.
Lum quickly floated over to where Goku was standing and gave him a big hug.
"Good morning, Darling! Did you sleep well?"
"I guess." The Z-Fighter replied with a shrug.
Ten wasted no time in floating over to Bulma and her mother. He grinned and cutely waved at them.
"Morning, hot babes... I mean, Bulma and Panchy! Hehe!"
Dr. Brief temporarily set his paper down to address the Oni toddler.
"What about me?"
Ten deadpanned. He honestly forgot that the old scientist even existed. "What about you?"
Taking the hint, he sighed and continued reading from the newspaper.
"I swear. No respect for the elderly these days."
Seeing the two aliens up close and personal like this, Cherry, in a crazed state of hysterics, accusatively pointed his finger at them.
"There! That's them! Your life has been jeopardized by an invader... Lum!" He shouted. "You'll surely face your doom with her around! Mark my words!"
Lum glared at the short priest in annoyance.
"Excuse me? I am not jeopardizing anything! I love Goku and only wish to make him happy!" She then clung to Goku's side and suggestively batted her eyelashes at him. "Right, Darling?"
"Uh... sure, Lum." He nervously chuckled.
Ten curiously floated over to Cherry and inspected his rather unattractive physique. He could even see his reflection through the priest's bald head.
"What even are you, mister? Some kind of living toenail?"
Cherry gasped. "H-How rude! Here I am trying to cleanse the poor man's soul of this alien temptress and all I get in return is disrespect! A boy your age should be ashamed!"
"Ergh! You should be ashamed for talking that way about Lum, idiot!" Ten growled. He then took a deep breath and blasted a stream of fire at Cherry's face. The man was completely coated in flames, much to everyone's collective horror.
"Woah! Settle down there, kid! You're gonna get us convicted for manslaughter here!" Bulma yelped.
"Bulma's right, Ten. What in the world were you thinking?!" Lum shouted in agreement.
He coughed out a small puff of smoke and innocently placed both hands behind his back.
"Sorry..."
A large bolt of lightning then struck the house and caused all of its electrical components to cease operation. Even in the morning, it was now almost completely dark.
"Oh man. All the lights went out." Goku muttered.
"See? I told you so! This is direct evidence that something evil is approaching! You should run while you still have the chance!" Cherry warned them.
Bulma did not look all that convinced by his baseless ramblings.
"Seriously? It's a temporary blackout. There's nothing to run from." She snorted. She then opened the front door and practically shoved him towards it. "Now, if that's all you wanted to say, I suggest you leave and go back to... wherever you came from . We have some more important things to worry about right now."
"Like eating breakfast?" said Goku in a hopeful tone. Lum could only giggle at the overly eager tone in his voice.
"Well, I was mainly referring to turning on our backup generator, but yeah, that's one of them."
"But—"
Before Cherry could say another word, Bulma abruptly slammed the door in his face once more.
"My, what a strange man." Panchy commented.
"Tell me about it. Let's hope and pray that he doesn't decide to come back."
"Funny considering he's a priest and all." Dr. Brief chuckled.
"Alleged priest, Dad."
While she went to turn the lights back on, Cherry stood outside, completely dumbfounded. The rain poured down on him as he accepted defeat and walked away. Parts of his body were still scorched by Ten's fire breath, but in spite of the searing pain, he didn't pay much attention to it.
"How terrible. They're all cursed! Every single one of them!" He hissed, cupping his hands together in a sign of prayer. "Tis' their shared fates now. They have my pity."
Cherry then began walking back to Tomobiki or wherever he decided to end up that day.
Somewhere in West City...
Chi-Chi was now hellbent on keeping Lum's grubby little fingers away from Goku. Upon waking up, she took off her mother's wedding dress, put on her blue-red martial arts gi, and flew over to West City on Nimbus. Normally, she would have used her father's car to get there, but the Flying Nimbus simply made the trip go by a lot faster.
She just hoped that Goku was alright with her borrowing it for the time being.
At the moment, Chi-Chi was walking over to Capsule Corp with a raging fire in her black eyes. She was a little taken aback by the huge thunderstorm taking place, but that wasn't enough to stop her from seeing Goku. Even without an umbrella, she kept moving with a somewhat confident spring in her step.
"I'm coming, Goku. Not even a storm like this will keep me away from you." Chi-Chi whispered. She then tightly clenched her fists in newfound rage. "I'm not gonna let that green-haired bimbo win!"
Fire Mountain's princess continued walking along the sidewalk until, all of a sudden, she saw something fall from the sky. She stopped in place to get a better look at it.
"What is that?"
Descending from the upper atmosphere was an orange and green spacecraft covered in black stripes. Pillars of smoke trailed from its damaged thrusters as the ship crashed into the ground and shattered into multiple pieces.
It landed a few feet away from where Chi-Chi was standing, much to her curiosity.
"Hmph. If only that were Lum's UFO..."
She approached the spacecraft and saw a lone figure fall out of the cockpit. It was a teenaged boy with green hair, yellow horns, and an orange jumpsuit covered with black stripes. He might as well have been wearing a whole tiger.
"Are... Are you alright?"
Rather than answer, the boy stood up straight and looked at Chi-Chi. There was a faint sparkle in his blue eyes that caused her to blush.
"W-Wow. He's so... handsome!" She thought. "I mean, he's nothing compared to Goku, but still..."
Chi-Chi tried to keep her flushed cheeks under control and said, "Do you need help at all? That looked like a pretty nasty crash."
Once again, he said nothing in reply. He merely limped over to Chi-Chi and grabbed ahold of her hands. This caused Chi-Chi to become even more embarrassed.
"U-Um... I'm flattered and all, but I... uh... kind of have someone who I wish to—"
"Lum."
Chi-Chi blinked a few times in surprise. His voice was so deep that she just barely managed to catch what he said.
"Wait, did you just say, Lum? You know her?"
The boy let go of her hands and nodded. This revelation caused Chi-Chi to smile deviously.
"This is perfect! If Lum and this random handsome guy, who I assume is another member of her race, hit it off, then Goku will be all mine again! We might be able to resume our wedding, after all."
She then cleared her throat and smiled at the Oni boy in a much more courteous manner. He, on the other hand, maintained the same stoic facial expression.
"I can bring you to her then. Follow me."
The two then headed over to Capsule Corp without delay. Chi-Chi didn't notice, but for a split second, the boy's horns and face began to contort in something more monstrous the moment he started getting excited about seeing Lum again.
Back at Capsule Corp...
With the electricity up and running again, everyone, Bulma included, sat down and had some breakfast together. Panchy tried her best to cook as much food as possible, but Goku's stomach, as always, was quite difficult to satisfy. He already managed to scarf down half of the meal after a few minutes or so.
Ten didn't exactly know how to react to the massacre that took place in front of him. He always heard of how impressive Saiyan appetites could be, but Goku's exceeded any prior expectations he might have had.
"Yeesh. If I ate that much, I'd probably explode."
"Well, you are still just a toddler, Ten. Darling's stomach might be just as big as you. Hehe." Lum joked.
"I wouldn't go that far, but hey, you could be right." Goku chuckled while stuffing some scrambled eggs in his mouth.
Bulma rested a hand on her cheek and sighed. "At least you saved some for the rest of us this time..."
"Oh, don't be so hard on him, dear! Goku's a growing boy. It takes a lot more to satisfy him than others." Panchy said.
"Especially when it comes to fighting. That's his second love right there." Dr. Brief added.
"Oh? And what would you say is your third love, Darling?" Lum purred mischievously. She leaned close to Goku and touched his chest. "You can tell me."
"Sleeping." Bulma quipped.
The Oni princess's expression soured immediately.
"Way to spoil the mood, Bulma."
"Just telling you like it is. Goku loves to sleep, eat, and fight. Everything else in his life pretty much comes second to those things."
"Even girls?" Ten asked.
Bulma had to stop herself from laughing out loud. This kid definitely had so much left to learn about Goku and their little group in general.
"Kid, have you met him? He doesn't have a romantic bone in his body."
Goku obliviously tilted his head to the side. "Romantic bone? Is that something I should have?"
"Case and point." Bulma snickered.
Lum crossed her arms and nodded in begrudging agreement.
"You're right. Darling may not be romantic now, but there's still time for him to learn. He just needs a beautiful, affectionate woman by his side who can guide him in the ways of love and desire." She proclaimed while resting a hand on her chest. "And I, as his fiancée and future wife, can do just that."
"Right. I'm sure Chi-Chi would say the same thing."
"Who's that?" Ten wondered.
The front door then seemingly swung open on its own. Standing there was none other than Chi-Chi with an innocent, yet cheeky grin on her face.
"Morning, everyone."
Lum was not happy to see her at all. She wrapped her arms around Goku's body nice and tight, so he wouldn't be able to greet his former fiancée.
"Well, speak of the devil. We were just talking about you." Bulma said. "How are you feeling, Chi-Chi?"
"I'm doing alright. I was a little upset about what happened yesterday, of course, but my dad helped cheer me up."
She then narrowed her eyes and ever-so-slightly sneered at the Oni princess.
"Though, I do have some good news. I actually found someone who has been meaning to talk with you, Lum. I'm sure you'll be just delighted to see him again."
Chi-Chi then stepped to the side and unveiled Lum's supposed "friend". His presence immediately caused her eyes to widen from absolute shock.
"R-Rei?!"
"Lum!"
With that, all hell proceeded to break loose. Lum let go of Goku's arm in a state of panic and ran all over the house to get away from Rei. The tiger-striped Oni, however, was persistent in his fierce pursuit of her.
Everyone watched as they went from one side of the room to another. Chi-Chi took this opportunity to sit next to Goku and talk with him.
"Lum didn't cause you too much trouble, did she?"
"Not really. I just showed her around Capsule Corp and met her little cousin, Ten." Goku replied. He then pointed over to the small Oni floating beside them. "That's him, by the way."
"Ah, I see. Hello there." Chi-Chi greeted with a small wave of her hand.
"Hi! You're very pretty, Miss." Ten chirped.
"Aww. Thanks! You're a little charmer, I see."
"Yup! I'm a good boy."
Goku's eyes darted from Rei to Lum and back. Judging by her facial expressions, he could tell she didn't like this guy one bit.
"Speaking of which, do you know what this Rei dude's relation to Lum is?" He asked.
"He's her former fiancé. They were engaged a few months before you had that tag game with one another." Ten explained.
This information pleased Chi-Chi considerably, but she didn't let it show on her face. She maintained a neutral expression and nodded.
"A few months? Any reason why they broke up?"
"Something about him being arrogant and only interested in food. I don't remember the exact details." Ten replied.
"Well, whatever the reason, it must have not been mutual."
Bulma, Panchy, and Dr. Brief could only watch as everything in their home was toppled all over the place. No matter what they tried to say or do, Lum continued running away from Rei like the plague.
"I'm not going back with you, Rei! Leave me be!" She screeched. "Go away! Go away! Go away!"
"Lum!"
"Rei! Go away! Go away! I hate you!"
Starting to become desperate, Lum locked eyes with Goku and hid behind him. "Darling! Knock that creep's lights out for me, alright? Please?"
"I don't know, Lum. He doesn't really seem all that strong to me." The martial artist mumbled.
Lum sniffled and stared at Goku with her big, watery blue eyes.
"B-But... B-But he's trying to take me away from you! Don't you care about that, Darling? After all that we've shared together?"
Chi-Chi deadpanned. "It's been a day..."
"So? That's more than enough time to know that I love Darling and not that gluttonous weirdo!"
"Are you sure? Not trying to sound too materialistic here, but the guy is pretty damn handsome. Any girl would feel lucky to be with a guy like that."
Upon saying that, Rei stood in front of Bulma and boldly kissed one of her hands. This caused her to look away and start giggling like a schoolgirl.
"Hehe. Oh, yeah. Very, very lucky."
"Don't you have a boyfriend?" Ten reminded her.
Suddenly remembering her issues with Yamcha, she narrowed her eyes and growled at the alien toddler.
"Y-Yes, I'm aware of that! Is it wrong for a girl to like feeling wanted once in a while?! Huh?!"
Ten covered his ears and grimaced.
"Geez, Lady. No need to bite my head off." He said. "You're the one who was turning as red as a tomato."
"Oh, shut up already!" Bulma growled. She then sat back down and tried her best to look away from Rei. "Lousy brat telling me what I can and can't feel..."
Rei himself then sat down and proceeded to stare at Lum. She upturned her nose, pretending he wasn't there.
"Look, he seems to know how to treat women well, so why don't you just go back to your planet? You should be with your own kind." Chi-Chi suggested.
"Nope! I refuse!" Lum snapped. "He turns into something weird and ugly whenever he gets excited! I dealt with it once and I'm not dealing with it for the rest of my life!"
She then frowned and began to look at Goku with desperate, pleading eyes.
"I... I... want Darling instead!"
She pounced on Goku and sent him flying out of his seat. They were now lying on the floor with Lum suggestively resting her body atop the Saiyan's chest.
"Woah! Settle down there, Lum! You could have hurt yourself." Goku yelped.
"I don't care. All I want is to be by your side and no else's!"
Seeing Lum in such an intimate position with Goku enraged Rei to the point where he began, as Lum warned, transforming into something weird and grotesque. His horns grew just a tad bit longer and his teeth became sharper.
"See! His real self is coming out!"
"So what if he turns into some monster once in a while! Every person in a relationship isn't perfect!" Chi-Chi shouted. "Look at Goku, or your so-called 'Darling', for example. I love him dearly, but he's both dumb and thick as a brick."
Although somewhat accurate, Goku still felt a little offended by Chi-Chi's remark.
"Hey, not true. I can be pretty smart where it counts."
"Exactly. And Rei isn't smart when it comes to anything!" Lum agreed. "At least Darling has actually made something of himself."
Ten floated close to Rei's ear and whispered, "She's got you there."
Even Rei himself couldn't argue against this. He used all the money he had just to get here, after all.
"Uh-huh."
"He even admits it! He hasn't changed at all!" Lum screamed as she repeatedly slammed her fists on the table in frustration. "No way can I stand such a tacky man! No way! No way!"
She then embraced Goku once more and smiled pleasurably from ear to ear.
"I wanna stay here with Darling!"
Chi-Chi was now struggling to contain her anger. She dug her fingernails into the table and dragged them downward.
"Ergh! If you know what's good for you, you'll stop hugging him so tightly, bitch! If good looks are enough for someone like Bulma, they should be good enough for you!"
"Ugh! Don't drag me into this!"
Dr. Brief blew out some smoke from his cigarette and said, "If the shoe fits, dear..."
Bulma narrowed her eyes and glared at the old scientist.
"Just shut up and keep reading your paper, Dad."
"Will do."
Despite Chi-Chi's protests, Lum was adamant in professing her feelings for Goku. She shook her head, causing her long green hair to sway from side to side.
"No! No! No! Good looks will never be enough! Absolutely no way!"
"Then why not have Rei and Goku duel each other? We'll be able to see who's really better than the other." Ten suggested. "It'll help settle things much quicker."
Rei nodded and brought out some type of extraterrestrial weapon from his pocket. He then aimed it directly at Goku.
"Gun."
"I'll take that as a yes then." Bulma said.
"I guess I can accept that challenge. But what will this 'duel' be like anyway? Just a fight or something else?"
"We do have a lot of food leftover, so why not an eating contest for the first round? You did say Rei was a glutton, right, dear?" Panchy asked.
Lum glanced at her former fiancé. His mouth was starting to salivate just by looking at the food Mrs. Brief made.
"Yes. A greedy one too." She glowered.
"Then he'll be more than a match for someone like Goku. I'll set up two bowls of steamed sweet potatoes for the two of them." Panchy offered. "The first one to finish them, wins! Sounds good?"
Goku gave her a thumbs up. "Yep. I don't have a problem with that, Mrs. Brief."
Rei, in contrast, stared at the blonde woman and nodded. This caused a deep red flush to adorn her cheeks.
"Teehee. How embarrassing! Don't look at me like that, please!" Panchy squealed.
Dr. Brief rolled his eyes. "Like mother, like daughter."
After a few minutes of careful preparation, two bowls of steamed potatoes were set in front of Goku and Rei respectively. They sat across from each other while everyone else stood off to the side.
"You do know that Goku's going to win this easily, right?" Bulma asked.
"Of course! I wouldn't expect anything less from my Darling!" Lum beamed.
Chi-Chi snorted. "I think you meant to say my Goku."
Lum narrowed her eyes and condescendingly winked at Fire Mountain's princess.
"Keep telling yourself that, homewrecker."
"W-What did you just call me, you—"
Their bickering was interrupted by Panchy standing in between both competitors. She looked from Goku to Rei before raising three of her fingers.
"Alrighty, boys! You can start eating in 3... 2... 1..." She said while counting down to zero. "Now!"
The two munched on one potato after another in quick succession. Goku had a fairly content, jolly look on his face while Rei, oddly enough, was getting somewhat emotional. Tears were slowly falling from his eyes the more he ate.
"Wow. Is Rei usually prone to being this sensitive?" Chi-Chi asked.
Lum facepalmed and said, "No. He's crying tears of joy because the potatoes taste so good."
"Uh-huh." Rei affirmed as he chewed and swallowed one potato after another.
However, before he could even get close to finishing the entire bowl, Goku used his ki abilities to pick up the pace and finish all of his potatoes with relative ease.
"Man, that was good! You mind if I finish your bowl, Rei?"
Rei was stunned speechless. This man not only stole the woman he loved, but also planned on stealing his bowl of delicious potatoes. He couldn't stand this level of humiliation any longer.
From his perspective, Goku needed to be taken down and eliminated at all costs!
He exponentially grew in size and tore through his tiger-skin jumpsuit. Within seconds, he was now a massive, bulky Ushitora, or Cow-Tiger, with big orange ears, black stripes, and long yellow horns. He also had a black bushy tail that burst forth from his backside.
"And the first round goes to..." Panchy gasped at the sight of Rei's transformation. "Oh my!"
"RAOOOOH! MRAAAAOH!"
Rei continued to grow larger and larger until he burst forth from Capsule Corp's roof, causing all sorts of property damage that made Ten's arrival look like child's play.
"I can see what you mean about the transformation now." Chi-Chi gulped.
"Told you."
With the house now caving in on itself, Goku, Lum, Ten, Chi-Chi, and the others all ran outside. Lightning continued to flash in the background as Rei roared and prepared to go on a rampage throughout West City.
Goku didn't look concerned at all, however. He was excited to see what Rei's new form was capable of.
"Not bad. Let's get round two of our duel started, Rei!"
He cracked his knuckles and flew towards the transformed Ushitora. Lum clapped her hands together in excitement.
"Yes, Darling! Fight to protect me!"
"Protect you from what? He may look big, ugly, and threatening, but I doubt he's all that strong." Chi-Chi pointed out.
"True, but I don't think Rei knows how strong Goku is." Ten noted.
"MRAAAAOH!"
Rei swiped his arms and tail at Goku, but none of these attacks seemed fast enough to hit him. He simply flew from one point in the sky to another.
Since the Oni was blinded by rage and jealousy at the moment, Goku really didn't get much satisfaction out of dueling him like this. He sighed and tried to think of what he could do in this situation.
"Hope I'm able to hold back enough not to hurt him too bad. Maybe a small punch should be good enough."
"RAAAAAOH!"
This time, Goku effortlessly stopped one of Rei's paws in place. He smirked and balled one of his hands into a fist.
"Now... it's my turn."
He then pulled back his arm and swiftly punched Rei in the stomach. Unfortunately, due to Goku's immense strength, the poor Ushitora was sent flying into the distant horizon and would travel miles upon miles of distance before he'd even begin to land anywhere.
"MRRRAAAAAAAAOOOOH!"
The only trace of him left was now a small star-like twinkle in the sky. Needless to say, Rei probably wasn't going to come back for a while.
"Oops." Goku sheepishly gulped. "Guess Rei was a lot weaker than I thought."
Dr. Brief sympathetically looked up at the sky and smoked his cigarette.
"Poor boy. He truly had no idea what he was up against."
Goku then landed in front of both Lum and Chi-Chi. They both proceeded to give him a huge hug.
"You won, Darling! I knew you'd protect me from Rei!" Lum cried.
The black-haired girl roughly pulled Goku away from her and snarled.
"You didn't need to be protected at all! Goku won the duel for himself, not you!"
An annoyed Lum tried to bring Goku back to her.
"Oh, is that so? You're just jealous, because this whole situation had nothing to do with you!"
Goku sighed and tried his best to break out of the duo's death grips. "Come on, guys. Can't you just be nice to each other and stop arguing?"
""No!""
They continued yanking Goku in a tug-of-war motion while Ten watched them from the sidelines. He rested a hand over his chin and thought over the promise he made to Lum yesterday night.
"Welp, that settles it. Goku is most definitely a Saiyan." He thought. "A good one too. Didn't think one would ever exist before now."
Shortly afterwards, Bulma broke up the three of them and directed their attention to the totally destroyed Capsule Corporation building.
"As much as I enjoy seeing you three bicker like this, we have more pressing matters to attend to. Like fixing the giant freaking hole in the roof that your ex-fiancé made, Lum!"
"How was I supposed to know he would transform indoors? I shouldn't be held accountable for that! That's not fair!" Lum insisted. She then pointed a finger at Chi-Chi. "None of this would have happened if she didn't bring him here!"
"You're blaming me for this?! He came here looking for you, remember?!"
"Hmph. Sounds to me like something a guilty person would say."
They proceeded to glare daggers at one another while Goku, as always, stood in the middle of it all. He looked over at the roof in slight guilt.
"You want me to help fix the roof, Bulma?"
"That'd be great, Goku! It might take the whole rest of the day, though. You alright with that?"
Goku shrugged. "Eh, I have nothing better to do, so why not? I could use it for some extra weight or something."
At the mention of Goku repairing Capsule Corp's roof, Lum and Chi-Chi swooped in to offer their assistance.
"I'll help too, Darling!"
"No, I will!"
"No! Butt out!"
Lum then latched onto Goku's back like some type of humanoid spider monkey and showed off her fangs.
"No! Leave me and Darling... ALONE!"
Electricity powerfully surged out of Lum's body, electrocuting Goku, Chi-Chi, Ten, and everyone nearby in the process. They spasmed about from sheer pain and, ironically, shock.
"GWAAAH!"
When the shockwave dispersed, the entire group, apart from Lum, all collapsed onto the floor in minor soreness. Adding further insult to injury was the fact that Capsule Corp's building got even more damaged than before. It was sprinkled with all sorts of holes and scorch marks.
"I'm starting to think that Cherry actually had a point about those evil spirits..." Bulma grumbled.
They definitely had some work to do now. And with Lum around, they'd need to find ways to mitigate the damage as much as possible.
*And that's the end of Chapter 4! I hope you liked how it turned out. I tried to remain faithful to Rei's first appearance while adding some original scenes here and there. I especially liked writing more of Cherry's interactions with Bulma. There's definitely going to be more scenes like that later on, especially since Cherry always manages to show up one way or another.
I also liked having Ten and Lum promise to not reveal Goku's Saiyan heritage. This will be an important plot-point throughout the crossover, particularly once Vegeta, Raditz, Nappa, and other Saiyans start showing up (they'll be appearing much earlier than in the canon Dragon Ball Z, so that will cause a lot of conflict for obvious reasons). That's why I'm excited to have other Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z show up in later chapters as well.
The duel between Rei and Goku was also short, but I think it helped establish their one-sided rivalry with one another. It'll also have an effect on what Ran thinks about Goku (who will likely be appearing in Chapter 6 or sometime later).
With that being said, please leave a vote, review, and/or comment to let me know what you think about this chapter. Chapter 5 will likely focus on the appearance of Kurama and the Karasutengu, so that's bound to be a pretty funny chapter, in my opinion. See you again once that's posted! :)