THREE DAYS LATER.
He hates me. He has to hate me. There's no way he doesn't hate me.
I never got to tell him I love him.
"What about The Princess Diaries?"
I pull at a loose thread from the pillow on my lap. "I'm not in the mood, Iris."
She frowns, stacking old CDs and sliding them to the center of my bed.
"Layla ..."
A tear slides down my cheek and I wipe away before she can notice. "I'm fine. Could you please just leave me alone for a while?"
She sighs, getting up. "I'll come back in an hour."
I want to smile but my mouth won't let me. So instead I nod. She clicks my door shut on her way out. And once she's gone, I can't control the sobs that escape me. I cry like I've never cried before, my heart breaking into millions of pieces, and I feel actual pain in my chest.
I cry so hard I get nauseous. But I keep crying, crying until the tears finally dry. My heart is yearning for only one person in this entire world. And I can't have him. I probably won't ever again.
The ache is followed by emptiness and I stare at the paint of my wall for what feels like hours.
"Hey," my mom says, stepping into my room. "Lunch is ready."
She used to be a woman I used to look up to. Someone I aspired to be. I still do. But I lost a lot of respect for her. How can you tell your own child who they can and can not love?
"I'm not hungry."
She's not happy with that answer. "Layla, you have to eat. My wedding is in a week and I'd appreciate it if you looked fed in the pictures."
I scoff. "Could you be any more selfish? I had a gun to my head three days ago and you're worried about how I'm going to look in your wedding pictures? Make sure they lather their best foundation all over my neck too?"
"Layla, I get it, you're upset. But please don't act this way with me. I'm trying to give you some normalcy."
I shake my head. "I'm not upset." I'm miserable.
She leaves me in the silence of my room. After a while I get up and head downstairs, my muscles aching from sitting all day.
Nate left this morning to propose to Grace, so it's only Grandma, Grandpa, Hale, and Mom left in this house. They're all in the living room.
I make my way to the kitchen and grab the Tylenol from the medicine cabinet, washing two down with water. Crying has given me a massive headache.
Hale walks into the kitchen. He looks tired. His beard is growing and unshaven, and he has exhaustion present in his gait.
"All right?"
I nod, setting my glass in the sink. Then I clear my throat, shifting on my feet. "How's Gray?"
Hale hesitates, rubbing his stubble. "He seems okay ... considering the circumstances."
"Can I see him?"
Hale clicks his tongue. "Layla ... your mom wouldn't agree to that, you know that."
"Well, I'm not asking my mom ... I'm asking you."
He sighs. "Don't do that. Don't put me in that position. That's not fair."
I nod, swiping the rag over the already clean counter. "Have you talked to him today?"
"I did."
"Did he ask about me?" I sound so pathetic.
Hale clears his throat this time. "No. We mostly talked about what he discussed with his lawyer."
I nod again, my head bobbing up and down as tears threaten my eyes. Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry.
"They're hoping to get the charges dropped so that this doesn't go to court."
"What happens if it does?"
Hale puts his hands on his hips. "Well, Layla, with the evidence ... he'll be convicted. The judge will decide whether or not he has to do time. If it goes to court ... the odds are not in Grayson's favor."
Shit. I close my eyes and sigh.
"When does he get out on bail?"
"Monday."
"That's still three days away, Hale. I need to see him. Now."
"Layla ..."
"Please?"
He sighs, and looks at his watch. "We have to go right now. Visiting ends at six."
I run up and hug him. "You're the best."
I quickly bound up the stairs and change my clothes. Hale tells everyone we're going to pick up some apple pie for dessert from Gordon's Pie and Pastries. It's far so we have a good chunk of time.
I hear Hale telling my mom it'll be a good chance for us to bond.
Only we do no bonding. The drive over is quiet and I chew my nails the whole time. After twenty minutes we finally arrive at the facility. It takes another ten just to navigate through it.
"Who are you here to see?"
"Uh ... my nephew."
"Full name?"
"Michael Grayson Wallace Jr."
The old lady nods. "Fill this out, please. And who are you?"
"I'm Layla."
The lady smiles. "Okay, Layla. Are you a sister? Cousin?"
"Um ..." I hesitate. "Girlfriend." It feels wrong to say that.
The lady clicks her tongue and shakes her head. "It says here Michael Jr. is seeing family and his lawyer only, sorry, Darling."
I feel my heart sink.
"Why is that?" Hale asks.
The lady shrugs. "Seems like it's your nephew's request."
I literally deflate and I'm sure the lady noticed because she shoots me a look of sympathy.
Hale places a hand on my arm. "I'll talk to him."
I stop him, grabbing his arm before he has the chance to walk off. "No. Let's just go."
I already know what I need to. He doesn't want to see me.
He hates me. And it's all my fault.
Hale tries to cheer me up on the way back by putting on Carly Rae Jepsen's Call Me Maybe. I turn the volume dial down and face him in my seat.
"Can I ask you something?"
Hale shoots a glance my way before turning his attention back to the road. "Go on."
"Despite what my mom says, do you support this? Do you support me and Grayson? As someone who's going to be the father figure in my life, do you support me?"
I'm not even sure why I'm asking. When all is said and done, I'm not even sure Grayson will want to be five feet in my vicinity.
He lets out a long sigh. "Of course, I support you, Layla. And believe me when I say all I've ever wanted for Grayson is for him to be happy."
Maybe I ruined that. He was happy. I don't know what he is now.
I turn back around, crossing my arms. I should be satisfied with that answer. At least I have one person who supports me. Well, other than Grandpa. But all I can feel is that deep ache.
— — —
Monday couldn't come soon enough. I've been counting down by the hour and it's finally here.
"I'm not going to have him in this house, Dad. Not with my daughter just a few doors down from his."
I hear the distant conversation coming from the kitchen. I quickly grab the remote and turn the volume down so I can listen better.
"Mace, he has nowhere else to go. I raised you better than this," Grandpa says in a tone that would make me feel terrible about myself.
"I appreciate it, Dad. But my only concern right now is Layla. Look what has happened ever since he showed up in her life."
"They're in love, Macy." That's Grandma. "Try to understand."
Mom's voice is growing more upset. "I'm not going to try to understand. I was this close to losing my daughter. I would rather her hate me for the rest of her life than lose her. And loving Grayson has only brought herself to danger."
Footsteps enter the kitchen. The conversation dies then. "He's upstairs, getting his things. Kade's on his way to pick him up," Hale says into the quiet.
He's in the house. He's upstairs. I freeze.
"Are you sure you still want him at the wedding?"
"Of course," Grandma and Grandpa say at the same time. But I only pay attention to my mom's sigh.
"He's your nephew, Hale. Of course he can," she says, her voice tired.
I hear a slight shuffle of feet. "But ... people will talk," Hale says.
"Who cares. Just make sure he stays away from Layla." Then the kitchen goes quiet again and footsteps leave, the back door clicking shut.
I get up from the couch and head to the front of the house and wait on the porch, though my body protests with every step. I look like shit. I haven't showered since yesterday morning. My hair is in a ball at the back of my head, and I'm pretty sure the sweats I'm wearing are Nate's.
I wait for what feels like an hour. But I know time is moving slowly for me. Finally the front door opens at the same time Kade's car pulls into the driveway.
Grayson walks out with his gaze ahead, his duffel bag hanging over his body, his grip tight on the strap.
"Grayson," I say.
He looks at me and says nothing. I walk up to him but make sure I keep a good distance. His eyes roam over me, from my socks to the cherry blossom pendant around my neck, then he looks up, keeping his gaze ahead.
"Say something," I whisper, swallowing the lump in my throat.
His jaw clenches, the muscle ticking. "I have to go, Layla," he says faintly, avoiding my eyes.
God, it's good to hear his voice.
I clear my throat, tears forming in my eyes. "I came to see you. With Hale."
Silence.
"I'm sorry, Grayson." The tears start to fall. "But you know why I did it."
He closes his eyes, breathing. "Yeah. I know."
"I love you."
There. I've said it. I can't take it back now. I never want it back.
He sucks in a breath, his eyes becoming red from unshed tears. He looks at me. "I have to go," he says, a tear sliding down his cheek.
Pain like I've never felt before fills my chest.
I watch his back as he leaves me on the porch, breaking down. So many tears are pouring out of my eyes I can't even see him anymore.
At some point Hale finds me, sobbing on the floor of the porch. And he just holds me. I cry there in the arms of my stepdad, wondering if my life will ever be okay again.
"Sh," he says, rubbing my arm. "It's going to be okay, Layla."
I hope he's right.
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Remember to vote ! Sorry for the late update school is crazy 😭 thanks for reading guys! Any guesses as to what happened? I'd love to hear your theories so don't be afraid to comment!!