ooo. . . LET THE LIGHT IN!
( THE SUMMER BEFORE: )
It was the night of her sixteenth birthday.
Belly Conklin— her bestfriend that fueled all of her summers with fun , was beside her with a small smile on her face. Belly wasn't one for parties much , she felt out of place being younger than most of the people invited and Steven had made her promise she wasn't to drink anything. But all dressed up in her little cowgirl costume that matched Lorelai's , she couldn't help but smile as her friend latched onto her hand and pulled her threw the crowd. "Belly! We should go swimming." Lorelai grinned , her vodka–cran and shot of whatever it was Conrad gave her helping her let loose.
Belly giggled and apologized to the people Lorelai was pushing past shamelessly while tugging her through the crowd of people. "Conrad and Steven would kill me for letting you go swimming right now , Lore."
Lorelai rolled her eyes and smiled evilly when she finally reached the back door. She pulled Belly closer to her , the Conklin–girl couldn't help but shake her head laughing at Lorelai's actions , her hair brushing against the side of her cheek they were so close. "I wouldn't let them do anything to you , Bel–Air."
The smile was immediately wiped off of Belly's face at Lorelai's use of the old nickname she used to call her. Lorelaid watched one episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel–Air when she was ten and went around the whole entirety of Cousins saying Belly's new name was Bel–Air. "Please , no." Belly groaned while frowning.
"C'mon! It's unique." Lorelaid defended.
"It's stupid." Belly corrected whilst holding her finger up in the air.
Lorelai narrowed her eyes at her bestfriend , mocking her as she held up her finger. "Unique." She said again with narrowed eyes.
"Stupid!" Belly argued back.
Lorelai childishly stomped her foot and ignored the amused smirk making its way onto Belly's face. Pushing the hair away from her face , Lorelai scanned the crowd until she found a familiar face. In the far corner she saw the all too familiar head decorated with dirty blonde curls. A tanned arm reaching over someone to hold them against the wall , the same old smile on his face as he talked her up.
She paused at that and couldn't help the way her lips pursed. She felt frozen , watching him. Belly followed her gaze confused until she realized what Lorelai was looking at. Frowning , Belly could only imagine what Lorelai was feeling. If anyone would know— it was Belly. The Fisher boys were always something.
Belly tightened her grip around Lorelai's hand and pulled her attention away from Jeremiah Fisher. "We better go now if you want to swim!" Her whole face lit up as she smiled , something Lorelai loved about her.
Lorelai nodded at her and copied Belly's actions of sneaking through the doors. She tried forgetting about Jeremiah and that girl because quite frankly , it didn't really matter. Every party there was a different person , and his relationships only cycled to about six months and almost never lasted to the summer. Jeremiah was a player and he got around— and if it wasn't for Lorelai's moral compass she would've slut shamed him ( but! she didn't believe in things like that. . . ) It hurt to see him with other people but she always told herself that it didn't mean anything because if it did , Lorelai didn't want to know how bad that would hurt her.
She spent her summers loving Jeremiah Fisher. He was everything someone could want but all in the same it made her so angry! He was so boyfriend–coded that it physically made her chest tighten and burn at the thought of him being her boyfriend. Jeremiah was funny and he was caring , he knew how to be patient and he knew how to make all the bad things in life seem small and make light out of it. He was the embodiment of sunlight.
And Lorelai hated it.
She hated his stupid white teeth. His stupid tan skin. His stupid blonde hair. And even more so , his big , stupid heart. Jeremiah had a heart so big that he'd always care about someone or something more than himself. He would always be the happy , sunshine boy if that meant someone in the darkness could be brought to light— even if he wasn't feeling all that sunny.
"You should tell him how you feel." Belly told the blonde girl lightly , using her arms to keep her above the water.
The moonlight shined down on the two of them as waves crashed against eachother , it was quiet and peaceful. Lorelai didn't care about all the people partying it up in her house doing things only God could know about. She didn't care about the big party thrown for her or all the gifts people had brought. . . Nothing could make her happier than how she felt right now , swimming like nothing else mattered with her bestfriend.
"No I shouldn't." Lorelai shook her head.
"Oh come on!" Belly splashed her lightly. "Why not? You're not getting any younger!"
Lorelai huffed at that. "Because Jeremiah does not like me , Belly. If he did his tongue would be down my throat and not Kelly Kruse."
"Kelly Kruse?" Belly's face scrunched up. "I thought I saw him kissing Kevin Kruse."
Lorelai put her face in her hands and let out a dramatic sigh. "I'm in love with a manwhore!" She bellowed and Belly laughed in response.
"Oh stop! It's not that bad." Belly lied. Lorelai gave her a look. "Okay it is but—"
A sad look crossed Lorelai's face. "I don't want to talk about it anymore , Belly. He doesn't see me like that and he never will. I'm just the annoying neighbor." She sighed.
"That's not true!" Belly shook her head. "Remember when I got you sick? And all we had to do was play with eachother and Susannah made Jeremiah stay home with us?"
"Yes but he didn't want to , remember that? He was mad he couldn't go surfing." Lorelai pointed out. Of course she had remembered that day. Her little girl self had never been so grateful to be sick in her life. Although she could hear Jeremiah's mom force him to stay home with the two girls , the three of them had alot of fun that day. Jeremiah had gotten sick not too long after , and they had did the same thing for him as he had done for them.
"So?" Belly drawled out. "He still stayed with us. And he let you draw pictures on his back with those markers my mom had gotten you."
Lorelai let out a loud groan at Belly's constant pestering of Jeremiah and took a deep breath before dunking herself underneath the water. She allowed the water to drown out anything around her , shutting her eyes tightly. Coming back up , she splashed Belly one more time before nodding towards the sand. "I need another drink— I'm so not drunk enough."
Lorelai Sutton wasn't drunk. Tispy , maybe. Belly was her keeper for the night , letting her have the fun she deserved but also ( and this cannot be confirmed or denied ) might've switched out her shots of vodka with water. It was rare to see Lorelai let loose and have fun— especially with the way things had been going for her. As much as Belly adored Lorelai , even she couldn't deny that the blonde could be a little bit uptight sometimes. But now with the alcohol flushed through her system , Lorelai wasn't second guessing every move she made. She wasn't worried about making sure she didn't look too wide from the side or who would whispering about her. Not even Jeremiah tainted the carefree nature she was possessing.
"Belly!"
Speak of the devin and he shall appear— a ball of curly haired joy boisterous as ever rushed towards Belly who was currently giggling at Lorelai's antics. The eldest of the two friends swaying her hips to the song that was playing , throwing all of her hair to one side of her shoulder. The sigh of Jeremiah made Belly's stomach turn and nervously glance over at Lorelai. "Jere! Hey." She greeted anxiously.
"Being our girls keeper tonight?" He grinned cheesily and threw his arm around her shoulder. Belly's nose tickled when his breath swarmed her senses. She wondered if someone else's breath could make her nose hairs fall out— the stench of alcohol was nothing short of gross.
Nodding , the entirety of Belly's face lit up as she glanced towards her friend. "Yup."
Jeremiah smiled along with her and wandered his attention towards their shared friend. Beads of sweat dripped down Lorelai's forehead. Her face was bare , leaving a nature glow to take over her face when she grinned at the pair. Raising his eyebrows , Jeremiah turned up his charm. "Feeling it good , Lorie?"
Lorelai's eyes narrowed and her mouth upturned at the youngest Fisher. Ignoring the pit she felt in her stomach , her head cocked to the side. "Oh— I'm feeling something."
Her tone was underlying and Jeremiah couldn't help but smirk at it. Belly shifted uncomfortably. "How many of those have you had?" He motioned over to her cup.
Lorelai shrugged. "Seven. . . ten?"
"Eight." Belly corrected her. "One or two of them might've been majorly diluted with water." She leaned over and whispered to him.
Jeremiah chuckled. "Gotcha." His eyes twinkled. "Well birthday girl— you did promise me you'd save me a dance."
Lorelai sighed deeply. Mentally cursing herself for promising that at the family dinner earlier that week. Honestly she hadn't expected Jeremiah to mean it. But the alcohol was making her feel bolder and although she felt tispy , Lorelai could feel the way he was looking at her. It was a way that made her knees feel like jelly. "You're right." Rolling her eyes , she downed the rest of her drink and threw it in the trash nearby. "Ready to cash it in?"
Belly bit her bottom lip feeling at battle with herself. She knew that completely sober Lorelai would be a blushing and mumbling mess— because Lorelai Sutton always wore her emotions on her face when she didn't realize it. Lorelai said time and time again that the crush she had on Jeremiah was long gone and was just a silly childhood thing , but Belly knew her better than that. Belly said the same thing about Conrad— and she was definitely not over it.
"You sure you're up for it?" Belly grabbed her hand and looked into her eyes for reassurance. "We can always make Steven and Conrad clear out the party and go up to your room."
Lorelai grinned at little Belly and squeezed her hand gently. "That sounds like something I can get behind— but I'm not quite ready for the party to end. I'll come and find you soon to take you up on that offer?" She promised.
Belly smiled and nodded at her friend. Sharing a secret look with her that said don't do something I wouldn't do.
Jeremiah's hand reached out to grab her. The weight of his hands on her waist made her heart thump so loud she could feel it in her ears. She tried ignoring the way her cheeks burned a bright red— avoiding the eyes that watched them. Jeremiah didn't seem to care about anyone else , the sound of the music drowning anyone else's murmurs. The beat was soft as the party was starting to dwindle down. Jeremiah's arms snaked around Lorelai's waist , dragging her body closer. "Are you having fun?"
He leaned down to speak directly in her ear. His breath was warm and it fanned her skin in a way that it tickle. She resisted the urge to shudder , playing it cool as she fiddled with the fingers that were crossed behind Jeremiah's back. "Belly took me swimming earlier."
A laugh rumbled from his stomach. Two fingers lifted up her stale hair that was full of salt water and sand , sticking together. "I can see that. Only you would sneak away at her own party to swim in the bay."
Two shots too deep to worry about her tattered hair and damp jean shorts , Lorelai shrugged. "I regret nothing." She sent him a big grin.
Being in Jeremiah's arms felt comfortable. More comfortable than she wanted to admit. She liked when he did things like this though she'd never say it out loud. It was casual for him , nothing more than a casual dance with a friend. But to her it was everything.
They swayed against the music and Lorelai had wondered what to say. His eyes were staring at her with a glint of something she couldn't quite figure out , not that she wanted to. She didn't want to complicate things. "So—"
"How does it feel being sixteen?" Jeremiah grinned down at her , subconsciously rubbing his thumbs on the exposed part of her hips.
"I don't feel any different." Lorelai sighed. "But I did think I saw a wrinkle on my face this morning and I bursted out crying."
Jeremiah chuckled. "Where?"
Lorelai backed up a bit to point to where she saw it on her face. Jeremiah squinted his eyes to look , moving closer to her. Lorelai's breathing couldn't help but hitch at the closeness. His nose practically brushing against hers. He reached out to caress his fingers over the skin , fighting back the smirk on his face as he did so. "Ah. I totally see it. You're practically disintegrating."
Lorelai scoffed and shoved his shoulder to move him away from her. "Yeah , okay."
White teeth glittered as he smiled. "I'm just kidding , Lorie. You look beautiful."
The compliment made her flush. She swallowed harshly before chuckling at him. "Are you saying I wouldn't be beautiful with wrinkles?" Lorelai accused.
"No you would." Jeremiah rolled his eyes at her. A strange expression took over his face before he nodded again. "You definitely will."
"Did you just imagine me as an old lady?" She giggled.
"Definitely did."
"That's not something I want to imagine." Lorelai crinkled her nose at the thought.
"Why not?"
Lorelai scoffed. "It's scary getting old."
Jeremiah shrugged. "It could be. But I think it's pretty awesome. It means you've been around for a long time and I can't wait to see you with wrinkles. How crazy will it be knowing that I've known you your whole life that I get to see you at sixteen and sixty."
Lorelai's heart couldn't help but jump at that. Knowing that I've known you your whole life. "I wonder what I'll be like at sixty."
Jeremiah smirked. "A grandmother with cute curly haired kids that visit Cousins every year."
Lorelai's brows scrunched confused. "I don't have curly hair."
"I know." There it was. That smile again. "But I do."
It took a minute for Lorelai to register what he said before her mouth fell open. Jeremiah's body shook with his laughs watching as she flushed pink and avoided looking into his eyes. "You're crazy for that one , Fisher."
"What can I say , Sutton? I'm crazy for you."
Lorelai sucked in a deep breath. Looking up at him she noticed he was already looking at her , gauging her reaction. She pursed her lips to hide a smile. "Yeah , what—ever."
"I'm serious." Jeremiah pressed himself closer to her , one hand going to cup her cheek.
Lorelai sighed and grabbed his wrist. She pulled it down away from her face. "Jere , you're being mean right now."
A look of confusion crossed his face. "Lore–"
"You're drunk , Jeremiah. Maybe we should go find Conrad or Belly." Lorelai shook her head and went to pull further away but Jeremiah stopped her , grabbing her hand gently.
"I'm not— I just. . ." He anxiously ran a hand through his hair. "Can we go somewhere to talk?" Jeremiah's tone was pleading.
Lorelai glanced around the room noticing how the party was starting to settle down a bit more. Their time seemed to be limited but none of her friends were around to catch them sneak away. Biting her bottom lip nervously , she nodded.
The air was thick around the two teenagers as they sat on the edge of Lorelai's bed. The situation sobered her up quickly and she couldn't help the overcrowded thoughts that were taking up space in her brain.
Jeremiah was the first to speak. "I meant what I said earlier , Lorelai."
"Jeremiah." Lorelai sighed. "You can't say things like that after going around kissing everyone at my birthday party."
A sullen look crossed Jeremiah's face as guilt started creeping in. "Lorelai that didn't mean anything , okay? I was just nervous about bringing this up with you and—"
"Where is this coming from?" Lorelai shook her head at him. "You've never seemed interested in anything more than just friends before and now all of a sudden—"
"That's not true." Jeremiah denied.
Lorelai crossed her arms. Was he crazy?
"Last year. Remember when we stayed up all night watching The Vampire Diaries because you started your period and couldn't go to the boardwalk with everyone and I stayed with you?" Jeremiah pointed out.
"You were being a good friend."
"Yeah and I couldn't wait to spend time with you. . . just me and you." Jeremiah admitted. He turned towards her fully , grabbing at her fingers that rested on the bed. "And when I bought you that bag of skittles and took out all the orange flavored ones because you hate when you get that kind and you want to stop eating them."
Lorelai's face flushed at the attention to detail he had about her. Something she hadn't really noticed much about before.
"Or when that guy made you cry when we were twelve and I hit him with the surfboard my dad got me and got it taken away."
Lorelai couldn't help but laugh at the memory. "You loved at surfboard." She covered her mouth to hide the laughter swelling in her chest.
"I did." Jeremiah said. "But I had the biggest crush on you and hated seeing you cry."
Lorelai felt her chest start to soften. If her eyes could turn into cartoon hearts as she stared up at him. She searched his eyes and there wasn't anything but the sweetest of glint hinting is pretty eyes , and stars surronded the top of her head in the shape of a halo. There was something settling in the pit of her stomach that yearned to reach out and touch him. To make that little girl who swooned over Jeremiah Fisher get the kiss she had always daydreamed about happen.
There was so much going on in her mind about how this could happen. What would happen in the morning when both of them fully sobered up? But Lorelai Sutton had always been a sucker and when Jeremiah slowly started leaning in— she couldn't help her lashes from fluttering against the apples of her cheeks. Full of warmth and buzzing around with adrenaline , nothing could compete with the feeling she had inside of her the bottom their lips touched.
She couldn't help the soft inhale of breath that left her mouth when she had. He had tasted of mint and his signature vodka soda that Jeremiah always made at parties. It was soft and inviting and it felt as though their lips were the perfect puzzle piece to eachother. Her heart was beating so fast she was sure it'd beat out of her chest if she didn't calm down. But his hands— the way one had gripped behind her neck to bring her closer to him and the other rubbed soft circles on her cheek. Kissing Jeremiah Fisher was like kissing the sun.
With one kiss everything had change and the both of them knew that. There wasn't any coming back from this. And Lorelai Sutton wouldn't ever forget how it felt to kiss someone this way.
When the sun shined through the light of her curtains , her eyes fluttered open in a daze. Her body stretched itself through the grogginess of the hangover already hitting her. The pounding against her skull was enough to make her groan and stay in place before she dawned on her that her body was bare underneath her comforter. A soft gasp left her mouth as she sat up quickly , looking around the room as the night from before starting coming back to her all at once.
She couldn't help but smile and touch her lips , her body still holding on to the feeling of Jeremiah's touch. But as quickly as it formed , the quicker it fell when she realized the other side of her bed was empty.
Her stomach sank.
She patted around her pocket's looking for her phone , searching the floor until she finally found it. . .
[ 25 UNREAD MESSAGES. ]
Half of them had been from Belly asking her where she had went. Belly had even called her a few times , followed by messages from Conrad and Steven wondering if she had seen Jeremiah and if they were together. Lorelai felt her cheeks warm up knowing that the three of them probably put two and two together and even then , tears had welled up in her eyes knowing that everyone knew. Which meant they all knew it meant nothing to him.
She wasn't going to respond until she saw one unread message from Jeremiah from a couple hours ago and a shaky breath left her mouth.
JEREMIAH: i'm so sorry , lorelai.
Sorry.
So that's what he had to say. But sorry for what? Sorry for kissing her and claiming that he had feelings for her. Sorry that he slept with her then left before she even woke up— sorry that it hadn't meant anything to him?
No. She wouldn't accept that and she couldn't. Not when she had spent her whole life loving him. He couldn't do this to her without a proper explanation. It wasn't fair.
Lorelai dressed herself quickly and was out the door before she could even begin to process the events that unfolded. Her heart and mind was an absolute mess and she needed to talk to him and demand to know what his problem was.
But she barely made it up the driveway when she saw a familiar car in the way. . . Alec's car. The same Alec that Jeremiah had mentioned not too long before. His summer fling before they had ended things not too long before her party.
Everything in her life didn't seem to make sense anymore.
With her stomach sick and her heart aching , Lorelai walked away from the summer house with the worst heartbreak she had ever felt.
AUTHORS NOTE!
literally jeremiah why u do this to me ??
i'm actually so excited for this story & ik
it seems like jere did a d!ck move but i
promise he had good intentions ???????
i also cannot for the life of me make a cover
i like for this story so it will keep changing
until i feel something is good enough.