According to Yuta's last message, he was about to close the restaurant. Unlike Yuta's apartment, the restaurant was on Toge's side of town. The black-haired man tried to hide the information away, but all it took was some probing to find out the name.
Why did Megumi have to make a move? Fushiguro might have tasted good; his chest might have been sweltering, but he wasn't the man Toge wanted. That much had become clear when Megumi kissed him. The question of how Yuta would react swam around in Toge's mind.
Toge didn't have to say anything. They weren't dating, right? But just having that spiky-haired man's lips on his mind at all felt like a disservice. If Yuta knew, then Toge might not ever taste him. If Yuta knew, he might leave.
No, Yuta wasn't fickle nor flippant. If Toge outright told him, then the storm would pass, right? Fushiguro coming around would be a bit more awkward, but that would fade. Wouldn't it? Too many possibilities, and too many of them were awful. If what Fushiguro said was all true, then he should just be happy if Toge hung out with him more. Toge could salvage the friendship - no strings attached. It would take some doing and a lot of perseverance, but it would work. Of course, Fushiguro would have needed to be truthful about everything he said, and that wasn't a guarantee.
The apartment was clean. Toge mopped and swept - he even dusted the vents. Yuta would be coming from his job; Toge had never seen him like that. What would he be wearing? Knowing it was on Star Avenue meant it wasn't extremely fancy. Then again, nowhere in their town was. Truly a blemish on the whole of Sukuna District; at least, that's what Toge's father used to say.
It might have been a little ugly in some places, but that was ultimately Gojo's goal. That's what he campaigned on when he became a city counselor. Most of the older families that lived in Tengan City were eager to cut down Kenjaku Town. When Toge moved there, his parents objected, but they seemed at ease as time passed by. But that was just the Inumaki side of things; the other families were larger and wealthier, which put them at odds with Gojo.
If it wasn't for that white-haired man, Toge probably wouldn't have moved to Kenjaku. He probably wouldn't have met Yuta. Then where would he have been? There were so many possibilities, other paths that would have taken him to a different place or nowhere at all. But Toge was happy; he was right where he was supposed to be.
Then, there they were. It was a brief jog to make it to the restaurant. The distance didn't matter; all that did was seeing Yuta. He couldn't wait. It was worth it. Yuta's kiss was savory with a hint of bitterness behind it.
"Don't leave me," Yuta said, pressing their foreheads together.
Toge didn't hesitate to speak. "Promise."
"I knew you would," Yuta hugged Toge tighter.
What happened to him? Toge so badly wanted to focus on the kiss, how it happened, that it finally happened. But Yuta was different. Did he know about Megumi? That would be a weird reaction to the person you liked getting kissed by another. Yuta did like him, right?
"I needed some time to figure it out. But when I saw you," Yuta said, brushing Toge's hair again.
Yuta's heart was beating fast, and his fingers were cold. Was he that nervous? Then again, Yuta was understandably the anxious type. Regardless, did Fushiguro get to him first? If that was Yuta's defense against another man's feelings, he had won.
"I saw him today. Geto," Yuta whispered.
Toge jumped back, almost falling into the street. He fully expected that Fushiguro's name would fall out of Yuta's mouth. If it were Geto, then what happened? Did they talk? Was Yuta okay?
"Woah! Toge! Be careful! It's okay!" Yuta reached out.
Luckily, there were no cars passing by. Toge stumbled but stood back on his feet. What did Geto want? What was his obsession with Yuta?
"He came to the restaurant earlier. I almost started a fight, actually," Yuta grinned, rubbing the back of his head.
Toge sighed. "You?"
"Yeah, mind if we talk about it at your place? It's a long story, and I don't know how good I will be at reading your sign language in the dark," Yuta smiled.
He was smiling? After mentioning Geto? The last time they had seen each other, Yuta was vomiting after the encounter. This time was different. The curiosity was killing Toge. What did Yuta do to start a fight? He was so gentle almost all the time. Though, if he almost started a fight with Geto earlier in the night, how would he react to the news about Megumi?
The ride came shortly after that - Yuta never let go after Toge jumped backward. When they had gone to the carnival, Yuta held his hand the whole way there. Back then, it just felt more comfortable. When Yuta held his hand on the way to Toge's house, it was different, as if letting go would detach them forever. He had Yuta, and he didn't want to lose the man. Yuta needed to know everything.
When they made it to Toge's apartment, he expected Yuta to have spoken at least a little. However, there were no words. He just smiled. Was Yuta actually okay? Was he happy?
It wasn't until the door opened and Toge was reminded of the coconut-scented Swiffer pads he had bought on sale that Yuta spoke, "Oh my god! It's so much cleaner than last time I was here!"
Toge punched him in the arm playfully.
Was it really that dirty? Megumi might have had a point about Toge's presentation. Then again, that was the reason Toge put on a button-up and dark-washed jeans. If Megumi noticed the lack of effort, Yuta would have noticed all of the time put into what he wore.
Yuta took off his shoes before grabbing Toge again, "Thanks for coming to see me early."
Toge blushed and said, "No problem."
Yuta placed his hands on Toge's waist an arm's distance apart. He looked up and down more dramatically, as if to elicit a reaction, but Toge didn't have one to give that wouldn't show the growing fear within the blonde.
"I said you looked good before, but I wasn't really looking," Yuta said.
Toge blushed again, signing, "Can we talk now?"
Yuta's face flashed a nervous smile, "Uh, yeah sure. If it's about me kissing you. I know I should have made that more private but-"
"No," Toge said.
"Oh, well what's up? Can we sit down?" Yuta asked, gripping his elbows.
Toge began signing, "Please don't hate me."
Yuta was delayed in response before signing back a rudimentary version of, "I could never hate you."
"Don't say that yet. I did something," Toge signed, feeling the warmth shift from his cheeks to his eyes.
"What did you do?" Yuta asked.
"I kissed Fushiguro," Toge signed back.
Toge's head fell. It was out. His hands fell to his sides, and he began to weep. Why did Fushiguro have to wait so long to do something? Maybe in high school, maybe before Yuta, but not after. Every second of silence was excruciating. What was Yuta thinking?
Before responding, Yuta wrapped his arms around Toge once more, "Don't cry."
"Why?" Toge asked.
"I don't care about Fushiguro as long as you don't. Toge, you don't have to be ashamed of what happened in the past," Yuta said. Toge was fully aware of the hypocrisy in the statement.
"Yesterday," Toge said again, his mouth muffled by Yuta's shirt.
Why did Yuta have to make it so hard? He could have just left or walked away. Why was he not in tears? Why was he not crying?
"Yesterday?" Yuta asked.
Toge nodded.
"That's fine too. Because I have you today. Right?" Yuta's voice rumbled in Toge's ears as he spoke.
Toge looked up. Yuta's ocean eyes were glassy. Tears hadn't formed, but they were seconds away. Was he actually okay? Did Yuta know Toge wanted him? Toge didn't even know that for sure until the kiss.
"Right," Toge said.
"That's all that matters then. Just don't do it again," Yuta said.
Toge couldn't help but laugh.
"I'm serious," Yuta muttered.
Toge pulled himself away, signing, "Never again."
Yuta tilted his head, "Good! Also, don't tell me he was better or I might have to break his face a little."
"When you smile and say that, you sound crazy," Toge signed.
Yuta brushed it off, "Am I smiling? I guess I am. It's just because I'm so happy with you. Since, well, this is dating, right? This is what dating is?"
Toge's cheeks flushed, signing, "You want to date me?"
"Assuming you said 'You want to date me?' yeah, of course. Though, this is my first relationship and as soon as Gojo finds that out-" Yuta started to say before being cut off by Toge's finger.
Toge glared and signed, "I won't tell him, or anyone, if you don't."
"You almost seem more sure of it than I do. I'm going to take that as you agreeing to not tell him. But, can I tell Kugisaki?" Yuta asked.
"Kugisaki?" Toge asked.
"The redhead from the carnival. She works with me now. Other than you, I think she's probably the easiest to talk to," Yuta said.
Did that list include Itadori? Weren't they like best friends that hung out all the time? Why would that random woman be above Itadori? Megumi was obviously out of the running, though Toge had a dark desire to tell Fushiguro just to see his reaction.
Toge never made it clear he wasn't interested. The way Fushiguro's shirt came off with ease didn't exactly help the case. Maybe Toge's silence on the matter cleared it all up and they were all on the same page. Or, maybe he would try and approach Toge at the meeting. That was right, the group meeting was the following day.
"No," Toge said.
"I suppose no risks are probably for the best," Yuta said.
The blood was still rushing through Toge's veins. Nothing was real. It was so sudden. How could anything like that ever happen? Yuta seemed happy, more so than when they were usually together. How long had he felt that way?
"So do you want to watch a movie? I am honestly so full of adrenaline I don't think I could sleep if I wanted," Yuta said.
What Toge wanted was to taste him again. For that second they were connected, the whole world fell away. Unlike with Fushiguro, it felt like they were frozen in time. The kiss wasn't happening to Toge; it was just happening.
Yuta blushed, "Or we could kiss again?"
Toge started to nod, but stopped himself, signing, "But, what about your day? Geto? You haven't told me about it."
"My day was fine, then it was bad, and now it's great! Geto sucks. I thought about the ethics of stabbing him. Can we kiss now, please?" Yuta rambled.
"Are you processing it?" Toge signed.
Yuta seemed confused and antsy.
Toge rephrased, "Are you thinking about it?"
"Only when you bring it up. We can talk about it later, okay? I just want to kiss you again. A lot. Badly," Yuta smiled.
There was no getting an answer out of him. That was the Gojo blood, or whoever their relative was. It should have been more obvious than ever that the two were related. Why was it such a big secret? Didn't Yuta know?
"Okay, but first. What's in the bag?" Toge signed, pointing at the two bags Yuta held on his wrist.
"Oh, one is all my junk. Shirt, underwear, socks, and the other is actually a gift from my boss. It's two puddings he was experimenting with," Yuta said.
"Pudding?" Toge said, his eyes lit up.
"You seem more excited about the pudding than me, haha," Yuta laughed.
"Can we have the pudding?" Toge grinned.
There were two desserts Toge considered to be massively underrated. The first was the silky flavor of a supple semi-sweet pudding. The second, while controversial, was pie, specifically buttermilk pie. Something about the complexities and subtle notes of bitterness were to die for.
"Okay, fine. He said the pudding would be best with milk," Yuta relented, dropping his bag of clothes by the door.
Toge snatched the paper bag with the disposable pudding cups inside. They were darker than he expected. What kind of pudding was malva pudding? It looked like chocolate, but it could have been savoury. Toge had heard rumors about clay and leather-flavored candies being a thing, which was intriguing, but he preferred to watch people try the odd stuff online.
"It's from the shop. The chef said he tried mixing coffee in it? I don't know if he meant espresso or instant. He probably told me, but I've been training Kugisaki when I am not on bar duty," Yuta said, following Toge to the kitchen.
So, it is a coffee pudding? Interesting, like a coffee jelly. That's why the chef said to mix milk with it - good taste was part of the job when someone is a chef. Toge pulled the small jug of milk from his fridge, when Yuta came from behind.
"I can do it. I have to do it all the time at work. It's one of the few things we do tableside," Yuta said.
"Okay," Toge signed, backing away.
Yuta popped the tops off the pudding containers with the palm of his hand as he talked to himself under his breath. He then picked up the jug of milk and, with complete concentration, poured a layer of milk on top of each of the puddings.
Almost instantly, there was a change in the color of the milk. Was that molecular gastronomy, on Star Avenue? Then Toge looked at Yuta's face, who seemed to be equally amazed. So that wasn't supposed to happen.
"Um. Well. I put the right amount. I guess this is what he meant by experimental," Yuta shrugged.
Toge grabbed two spoons and swirled the milk around, watching the pudding shift from a more gelatinous phase to a more formal pudding. It was a light brown, extremely shiny, and fragrant with various herbs Toge couldn't decipher. Toge poked at the pudding with his finger, just to feel the texture.
Yuta giggled, "Ew, don't touch it! Just try it. Usually, it's really good."
When Toge removed the spoon, it clung to the silver surface, and the rest bounced back into a flat form. Toge took a bite. It was surprisingly less sweet than he expected. There was a rich nutty chocolate flavor that encompassed the body of the pudding, but cloves and cinnamon were laced through. However, the coffee flavor wasn't quite there. It was hinted at, but it really just made the chocolate taste more like chocolate.
"Yeah, these are a bust," Yuta said, having finished half of his container.
Toge giggled at him. The black-haired man always did things like that. He was surprising and full of mysteries. Some were bad, but so many others were good. Somehow, the guy who didn't have any friends was surrounded by them.
Toge finished his off quickly to catch up with Yuta. Would Yuta taste like the pudding? While it was a fine flavor, Toge wanted to taste Yuta. Toge walked to the couch, and Yuta followed closely behind. It was only the second time Yuta had been there, yet things had changed so dramatically.
"We don't have to kiss if you don't want to," Yuta looked to the ground.
Toge pulled Yuta by the cheek, and their lips met again. Most of the pudding taste had washed away, but some still remained, adding a layer of sweetness to him. It felt like an intrusive thought at first, but Yuta was there with their lips pressed together.
Yuta pulled away, "If we're admitting things. I need to say something."
Toge signaled him to go on.
"When Itadori and I first met. That night we hung out. I saw him shirtless, but all I could think about was you. So when you were over, I needed to see you," Yuta blushed.
That was all? For a moment, Toge thought he would have to fight Itadori for Yuta, but that didn't seem to be the case. If Toge was on his mind back then, why didn't they kiss sooner? Though the blonde supposed the blame should have been split.
Toge signed, "Is that all?"
"Yeah, I thought that was kind of a big deal to mention. Other than at school, Itadori and you are the only people I have really seen shirtless."
"I'll do it again," Toge signed.
The blonde didn't want to be distracted from the Geto conversation, but Yuta was too close. When they touched, he didn't want to pull away. If Yuta said Geto could wait, then he could.
"Uh, yes please," Yuta said with wide eyes.
Toge unbuttoned his shirt, watching Yuta nervously jitter on the couch. The black-haired man smelled of herbs and spices. He didn't smell like a man, but rather like an elaborate fusion dish. Was that what he would smell like every night?
When Toge removed his shirt, he noticed Yuta sitting on his hands. Was he worried about touching Toge? There was a mix of fear and desire in Yuta's eyes, while the rest of his expression only demonstrated immense anxiety.
"I can put it back on," Toge signed.
"No! No. I like you like this. I... I just don't know what I'm doing," Yuta said.
"Here," Toge said, pulling Yuta's hands to his waist.
Yuta's palms were sweaty. His fingers were rigid for a few seconds, but they evened out with Toge's flesh. Toge hadn't had anyone touch him like that - it just seemed like the correct first move. The blonde took deep breaths, trying to even out Yuta's breathing by proxy.
"You're smaller than I thought," Yuta said.
Toge blushed, looking down.
"When you blush, your chest is red too," Yuta smiled.
Toge met stares with the deep blue eyes. They were calmer; the tidal wave had passed, leaving only placid pools glimmering behind. Yuta removed one hand from Toge's waist and began feeling around Toge's various muscles. His touch moved from Toge's clavicle down to his navel, stopping short of Toge's waistband. That would have been too bold.
"They are softer than I thought," Yuta said.
Toge signed, "What about you?"
Yuta blushed, "I don't have muscles like... you."
Yuta's eyes closed gently as the light behind them faded. Was he thinking about Fushiguro? The thought of Yuta feeling self-conscious caused Toge's shoulders to shimmy with frigid anxiety.
"I like the way you look," Toge signed.
"You've only seen me once, and it was an accident," Yuta frowned.
"So, show me again," Toge signed.
Yuta didn't seem to be paying attention. His hands were going limp as his fingers began to curl. The black-haired man had been so excited, but it was as if it were drained away from him.
Toge said, "Again."
Yuta's eyes opened quickly.
"Again. Again. Again," Toge was practically bouncing on the couch.
"Really? You want to see me that bad?" Yuta smiled a sly smirk.
"Again!" Toge shouted.
The sound of Toge's voice with more bass in it visibly shook Yuta. The black-haired man complied. He removed the green polo shirt to reveal his slender pale frame. Toge couldn't help but reach out and touch Yuta's narrow chest.
"Soft," Toge said.
Yuta blushed, revealing that his skin also turned red with his face.
"Um, Toge. I think I actually am feeling tired."
Toge froze in place. Was he not having a good time? Was this too forced? Was it Fushiguro again?
"I was wondering. Could I maybe sleep in your bed tonight?" Yuta released a big grin.
Toge wanted to hit Yuta for making him worry. All he had to do was ask. That's what Toge wanted anyway. The thought of Yuta sleeping without the blonde's arms wrapped around him was sacrilege.
"Yes," Toge said, smiling as well.
Toge stood, grasping Yuta's hand. The next thing the blonde remembered was Yuta's back hitting the mattress. He squirmed around for a minute before sniffing Toge's pillow. How did he know which one Toge slept on?
"Your bed is so soft! I am so jealous! I wish I could sleep here!" Yuta said.
Toge signed, "You could if you wanted to."
"I wouldn't want to impose, though. This is still your place," Yuta said.
"You're welcome whenever," Toge signed.
"Always?" Yuta asked.
"Always," Toge said.
Toge felt Yuta's hips between his thighs. They were sharper than he imagined, then again, he didn't know what to expect. The blonde bent over Yuta and kissed him. Yuta's hands journeyed lower than Toge expected, cupping him as their lips connected.
Yuta spoke between kisses with heavy breaths, "I like this. I like this a lot."
Toge didn't want to laugh; it was torture holding it in. Yuta was just too cute. It was as if he had no idea how to react to the situation unfolding around him. His lips were gentle and moved like jelly against Toge. Unlike with Megumi, there was no restraint. Yuta was fluid.
Then, Toge's phone rang. The sound wasn't supposed to be on, meaning it had to be someone in the important contacts list. Was it his father? Maybe the project lead? Gojo had been removed from the favorites list for a while, so it wasn't him. The blonde let it go to voicemail. Then it rang again.
"Maybe you should get that?" Yuta said with a frown.
Toge pulled his phone from his pocket. It was Maki. Why would she be calling? They weren't even that close. She was just an emergency contact in the area. She hadn't even texted Toge in months.
Toge jumped off Yuta, answering the call with InuTTS, "This is Inumkai Toge, the InuTTS system will be transcribing your call. Please allow time for a response."
"Inumaki. Tell your damn robot to shut up," Maki said.
Toge walked into the living room, holding a finger up to Yuta, hoping he would understand that it would only be a second.
Toge held the phone to his ear. Maki said, "Are you home, Inumaki?"
The AI voice replied, "Yes."
"Good. Good. Inumaki, Geto Suguru showed up at my father's house. He said something you need to know. You do remember him, right?" Maki sounded cold and confident as always.
Toge felt his heartbeat in his fingertips, "Why was he there?"
"Inumaki, listen, my father is dropping his stock in your father's company. Geto convinced him. I don't know what he said. I wasn't allowed to be there as the "failure." Just felt like you needed to know," Maki's voice was increasingly concerning.
Toge typed back, "What? No. If he does that, we'll start to plummet."
"I know. He is reinvesting somewhere else. Gojo said that tomorrow's meeting was about Geto. Do you know why?" Maki asked.
"I have a lot more on my mind than the group meeting right now," the AI responded.
"I heard from someone else that Gojo was canceling the meeting except me, you, Fushiguro, and Okkotsu. It was Nanami who mentioned it. Do you think he knows what Geto is doing?" Maki asked.
"Probably," the AI spoke.
"Okay. The stocks open in a few hours. You can't tell your dad. If he is able to have them stop the trading somehow on a stock dump, my father will know that I told you. I think we need to work on this together," Maki said.
"Since when are you interested in my family company?" Toge asked.
"Since Geto showed up and called me Zen'in trash. It's personal now. Regardless, you and Fushiguro are always going to be my friends," Maki said.
"There should be a limit to what your father can drop. If he drops too much, he risks dropping the entire stock market. He's a big name. He knows what he is doing. You better have a plan, Maki," the AI spoke with Toge's voice in cold, coordinated words.
"I gotta go. Just trust me. I will figure something out. Tell Okkotsu hello for me," Maki said.
"How did you know-" the call dropped before the AI could finish.
Maki was correct about the stock rules, but any unplanned sudden massive changes from the Zen'in estate would be troubling to potential traders. The stock would go down no matter what. Toge couldn't help but feel responsible. Was everything because of that one night? Or, maybe it was Yuta.
When the call dropped, Toge could hear whimpers from the bedroom. He turned to see Yuta's face buried in a pillow. His blood pressure raised. Was he willing to sacrifice his family's company for Yuta if it came to something so drastic? Toge shook it off- that situation didn't matter. Why was Yuta crying?
Toge ran back to the bed, laying one hand on Yuta's head.
"Toge, why?" Yuta's voice was muffled by the fabric.
Toge crawled into the bed beside him. There it was. The reaction the blonde had come to expect from the news of Fushiguro. It was delayed, but hearing the concern in Yuta's voice was mildly comforting.
"Why Fushiguro?" Yuta asked.
Toge stroked his hair as the words faded from the blonde's throat. He wanted to explain. But what would he say? It was an accident? There was nothing accidental about Megumi ending up on top of him.
"You like me, right?" Yuta turned his head, revealing a glassy sapphire eye.
"Y-ye-yes," Toge struggled to speak.
"Do you like him too?" Yuta asked.
Toge was more clear with his speech, "No."
"Promise?" Yuta asked.
Toge felt his eyes well up, "Promise."
"I didn't think this would ever happen. I didn't even really think about it much. But, when I saw you, Toge, I couldn't stop myself," Yuta said, sniffing the pillow as he lifted his head.
Toge blushed, holding his arms out to Yuta.
Yuta wrapped himself around Toge's waist, laying his warm face on Toge's chest. Was this enough to convince Yuta? Megumi was nothing. It was a mistake. Fushiguro may have done something in the past, but it was wrong of him to expect admiration for a task he gave himself. Toge didn't ask for protection; the fact that Fushiguro thought that was what the blonde needed was offensive, not comforting.
"I think this is as far as I can go for now, Toge," Yuta said.
"That's okay," Toge replied.
"I'm counting that as three words," Yuta said.
"What?"
"I have a habit of counting your words. Sorry if that's wrong or weird. It's just nice to hear them," Yuta said.
Toge blushed, "O-okay."
He was counting? No one had done that. Why was Yuta counting? Was that really the first time he had gotten close to three words?
"Today, Geto came in. I said that. I didn't want to talk earlier but, it is hurting," Yuta's eyes dripped.
Toge replied by rubbing Yuta's back.
"He told me that I was the reason he was out. That when I didn't testify, I was the reason he wasn't locked up still. Do you think... do you think I am a bad person?"
"No."
"I thought about killing him right then and there. It wouldn't have been hard. But I couldn't. There were a lot of reasons, but you were one of them."
Toge combed Yuta's hair with his fingers.
"I wouldn't have been better than him. But, I did yell at him. That was fun. Felt nice letting it all out for a moment."
"Yuta," Toge said.
Yuta sat straight up, "Say it again."
Toge was confused, "Yuta?"
"That's the first time you've said my name. I think," Yuta smiled.
"Yuta," Toge said.
"I'll never get tired of hearing you say my name," Yuta grinned.
"Yuta," Toge smiled back.
"So, you meant it. You don't want to be with Fushiguro?" Yuta's smile faded.
"You," Toge said, tackling Yuta back to the bed.
Had he really yelled at Geto? Just the thought of Yuta raising his voice was uncanny. What did he say? What was Geto's reaction? Why was he even there? Unless Geto knew who Yuta was. If Gojo could figure it out, Geto could too.