Just like how Freen ignored me, I decided to ignore her too. The connection between us had faded away. Yet deep down, I held a space for her in my heart, ready to welcome her back if she ever returned. If she had a reason for all the chaos, I was prepared to open my arms to her.
But then, the final year arrived, and both of us agreed to move on. I hadn't truly forgiven her, but my anger had subsided. Time marched on, and I found myself still holding onto feelings for her. It seemed I wouldn't be able to let go until I uncovered the truth.
I needed to hear Freen's side of the story.
As days went by, karma caught up with Freen. Professor Kim stumbled upon the video and removed her from her hosting role. I couldn't exactly say I was delighted, but somewhere within, I felt that this was a fitting consequence.
She held discriminatory views, specifically about being homophobic. And that aspect of her character wouldn't bode well. I was determined not to let her negatively impact our community.
"Hey Armstrong, Prof. Kim wants to see you," a fellow student informed me while I was engrossed in a book.
I nodded and headed to the office. And for the first time in a long while, I heard Freen's voice. I stepped into the room.
"Rebecca, you're here," Professor Kim greeted me. "I wanted to let you know that you'll be the host for next month's event."
I couldn't help but smile at the sight of her frustration.
"What do you mean she's going to host the Pride Month celebration?" Freen asked the professor, her eyebrows knitted in confusion.
"Miss Chankimha, you know you can't because of your... you know? Perspective," the professor explained, making me smirk in response.
"But that can't be!" Freen exclaimed, clearly upset by the news.
"Don't stress yourself out over this, Freen. Leave it to me," I said, patting her shoulder playfully and teasing her.
I knew she wanted to outdo me, but today, her homophobia stands in the way. The school can't allow a student with such a perspective to host a Pride Month celebration. Poor Freen.
"Fine, but promise me that before the Pride Month ends, I won't be like this anymore. Would you let me host the celebration then?" she pleaded.
The professor was taken aback by her sudden change in attitude. Was she finally willing to change? I wanted to laugh but kept my cheeky expression.
"Deal," the professor agreed, shaking Freen's hand, and Freen glanced at me with determination.
"Bring it on," I whispered with a playful chuckle.
Once Freen left, my smile faded and I let out a sigh. Professor Kim gazed at me, head lowered.
"I'm sorry, Armstrong. I couldn't really intervene when it came to Freen," Prof. Kim apologized, and I managed a fake smile.
"Save your apologies for her, Prof. Kim. She earned them. She hurt me for this," I said, then turned away.
Freen felt guilty for her actions, but I still wanted to talk to her. So, I followed her until she reached an empty room. She stared at the ceiling, fighting back tears that managed to escape.
I handed her my handkerchief, and she hesitated before taking it. Our eyes met briefly.
"Don't worry, I let Prof. Kim know I won't do it," I said, a slow smile forming.
"Why?" she asked.
"Didn't you use me for that purpose? To make me fall in love with you, all for this? Thanks for letting me experience love," I sighed. "But there's something I need to ask."
Freen simply looked at me.
"What really happened, Freen?" I inquired. "Why did you suddenly vanish? After I'd already given you my heart?"
"I'm sorry," she admitted. "Sorry for using you."
I swallowed hard. "So, you're not going to deny it? Can't you tell me it was forced, that you didn't have a choice?"
"No one forced me, Becky. It was my decision. And I feel guilty," she confessed.
"Then can you lie to me again? Tell me your love was real, even if it wasn't?" Tears welled up, sliding down my cheeks. "Can you pretend your feelings were genuine?"
Freen turned her gaze away, tears forming in her eyes.
"Stop hurting yourself, Becky. It'll only get worse," she said, moving to leave the room, but I blocked her way.
"Tell me you don't love me then," I urged. "Say you never loved me, so I can move on!" I slammed my hand against the board, making her flinch.
"I didn't... I didn't fall in love with you," Freen whispered, her head hanging low. "I'm sorry." She pushed past me.
I trembled all over. "Are you even human?" I asked. "How could you do this with my genuine feelings?"
Freen's tears fell anew. She looked at me, her eyes heavy with something more.
"Are you being forced?" I questioned, lifting her chin.
Freen shook her head, tears streaming down her face.
"You are being forced," I concluded.
"Whether forced or not, it's still my fault, Becky. You can curse me, hate me, blame me all you want! Just stay away from me, please," she said, and rushed away.
I stood there, stunned and confused by her response. What had changed in her? This wasn't the Freen I once knew. She was carrying something heavy on her shoulders.