~ ALEX~
[Situation: How to bring back an old record?]
It was a full house in Allure. Old and new patrons came and gathered at this venue for the night to watch the live performance of one of the top bands in the region, HAELE.
We were familiar with the band since we were in the same industry, and they're one of the groups that top the charts in all gig outlets when we were still starting as a group, so it's expected that a lot of their supporters were gathered here tonight.
What I didn't expect is to see Brianna together with the group. She never mentioned anything about her social life or the time she traveled and volunteered in Morocco. Brielle seemed to be stunned as well when she saw her sister, so I'm guessing she was not aware herself.
"Xander sigurado ka bang ayos lang sa'yo na ikaw ang maghatid kay Avy? Ayos lang naman kung anong maghatid sa kanya pauwi." Brianna looks at her sister, who's now sleeping soundly inside the car, worriedly.
"Nasanay na'ko . Matagal nang mahirap intindihin 'yang kapatid mo, mula pa noon may pagka-bratinella na talaga siya at hindi na ito bago sa'kin. Hindi ba't nabanggit mo na may pupuntahan ka bukas? Mabuti pa'y tumuloy ka na, ako na ang bahala rito."
Bakas ang pag-aalinlangan sa kanya. Marahil ay nais niyang kausapin si Brielle tungkol sa nangyari kanina, ngunit dahil sa kinikilos ng kapatid ay hindi niya ito magawa.
"O-Okay. I'll leave it to you, Xander. Please take care of Avy. You know how she is," she pleaded.
"You can always count on me Brianna." I assured her.
Tumango ito bilang sagot at tuluyan nang nagpaalam. Nang makaalis na sila ay bumalik na 'ko sa sasakyan upang makaalis na rin sa lugar.
"I know you're awake," I said but there was no movement from Brielle. "Fess up already. How long do you want to pretend?" I called, but still no answer. "Are you gonna talk or do you want me to drop you off at the nearest exit?"
I heard her click her tongue before facing my direction with a scowl on her face.
"So? Anything you wanted to say?" I asked.
"Bakit di mo ko pinasabay kina Bria? Akala ko ba ayaw mong nag-aalaga sa isang tulad ko?" She's pouting.
"You're right, I don't."
"Then why?" Now, her brow raised and arms crossed.
"You're avoiding your sister again Brielle." I tried to meet her eyes, but she looked away. She didn't respond and diverted herself from me and face front.
"I'm not." Her weak reply says otherwise.
"Kilala kita. Kapag galit ka sa kapatid mo, hindi mo siya kakausapin kahit ano pang pilit n'yang gawin para makausap ka. The more persistent she is, the more you avoid her so I decided to act before you do something you'll regret, again."
Alam kong alam niya kung anong inaasal n'ya kapag kaharap ang kapatid. Mula pa noon ay isang sensitibong paksa na sa kanya si Brianna, lalo na kung sila ay kinukumpara.
"Wala akong masamang ginawa," halos pabulong na wika nito.
I looked at her direction only to see her head down and twiddling her thumbs. A mannerism she has when she's uncertain, uncomfortable or lost.
"Hey, stop doing that," suway ko.
"Doing what?" She asked unaware.
Tch. She really doesn't know what she's been doing.
"Give me your hand," I said as I held my hand next to her.
"Ano nanamang pakulo 'yan, Alexander?" She's staring at me like I grew another head, but I didn't bother giving an explanation.
"Just hold it by the pulse and breath with me."
She continued to look at me with doubt, but still did what I asked.
"Close your eyes."
"May plano ka bang itapon ako sa bangin?"
"Tch. If I do, I should have done it years ago."
"Naninigurado lang. Suspicious ka eh."
As she closed her eyes, I made sure that she's holding my wrist by the pulse area. When she started to calm down a bit, I started humming songs that could send soothing vibrations through the pulse.
"Years ago, it was the only thing that made you relax and stop crying. I don't know if it still helps to this day but if everything seems to be like it used too, then maybe-"
"An old record can never be new again," she cut off.
"But that doesn't mean it doesn't work anymore."
She quite down. Since we came back from Myrefields, everything seems to have changed again. We act like how we were before Myrefields, but for some reason we can't go back there anymore.
"Alexander, what exactly are you doing?"
"Nothing much, but don't you think it's about time we settle things between you and your sister?
"There's nothing to settle."
"Wasn't there?" I didn't mean to raise my voice but this has to happen, " You're still wary about her, Brielle so that only means you still haven't talked about that time, you left and decided to live on your own all of a sudden , while your family was worried sick about you."
"So ako na ngayon ang may kasalanan?" She retort. "Ako nanaman ang mali?" She's on defensive mode.
"I'm not blaming you for that." I gently rub her hand to calm her. "I just want to fix your relationship with your sister."
"It's none of your business, Alexander," she insisted.
I don't want to keep pushing the topic on her but this has to be solved now or she'll just keep running away.
"It may not be, but for some reason I felt like you, avoiding her a while ago has something to do with the past and as much as you tried to hide it. I can see right through you and now I'm part of it."
"Tch. I never liked that part of you, Alexander," she sighed before continuing, "I just didn't expect to see her there."
"Let me guess, you talked to her when you went home?"
"I did but I wouldn't talk to Bria about how I live my life."
"She's your sister."
"She's just my sister, Alexander. We live a different life. We're not the same," she stressed in every word she said and matched it with a glare.
I took a deep breath. I know she's not going to give in easily. She's always been stubborn.
"Brielle, I've known you enough to know when you're hiding something."
"At kailan ka pa naging manghuhula?"
"Just spill it."
"I have nothing."
"What about Brianna?"
She clicked her tongue. Thinking of what to say.
"Why are you doing this?" She said in a strained voice.
"Trust me," I wipe those tears that started to escape her eyes, to give comfort. "It would help you lessen the burden you're carrying."
"I don't trust you."
Sadly. I know, and I can feel it.
"Then just say it like you used to. Say it as Brielle whom I met years ago. The one with a fierce personality and a dagger like words. Say it as you are now. I won't judge you."
She sighed again and closed her eyes one more time. When she finally spoke, I felt her grip around my wrist like it was scratching to bleed.
"What's hurting you, Brielle?" I asked again
"I hated you."She said, gritting her teeth, "I- You left with no words."
"I came back."
"You did not!" She clench
"But I did. I'm here aren't I?"
"No. You were not there when I needed you the most."
That caught me off guard. Brielle has always been brave. She always wore the smile of a nice and obedient child but I never knew how much of that is an act.
"H-Has your sister done something to you?"
Her grip says it all. Her insecurities are surfacing.
"What is it?" I asked.
"It's always been Bria. The darling daughter, the smarter child, the responsible one. It's always her. I tried to match her. I tried to be in her league. I tried so hard but not enough. Why is it not enough, Xander?"
The moment she opened her eyes and faced me, tears poured down her face. I pulled her to my side and gave her a comforting hug.
"You're enough Brielle. You made it to where you're now. Hindi mo kailangang magbago para lang mapantayan o maging katulad ang kapatid mo. You are who you are, and we are proud of who you've become."
Just like a glass full of water that broke and burst to pressure. She weeps.
[Conclusion: An old record can never go back to the same glory as it used to be, but the beat and music that once played in that record will forever be remembered just like our memories.]
xx