I made it to the front door quickly; steeping out down the gravel driveway I hear the door open, and close behind me. It's raining now.. almost pouring.
great! I don't care.
"Bella! Wait up." Toms footsteps caught up to mine, his hand on my shoulder turned me to face him.
"Don't you have some where to be? Wouldn't wanna hold you up."
I don't care if I'm being rude, I'm hurt.
"What? Come on you know me better by now than to think I'd let you walk home by yourself." He ran a hand across his forehead wiping away the cold rain droplets that laid there.
"You don't get to let me do anything, because you don't have a say in what I do! I'm not your girlfriend right? So don't get it twisted. See you later." I turned to leave again, his hand wrapped around my wrist pulling me back.
"What's wrong with you?" He looked hurt, and I almost believed it for a second.
He knew that I was inexperienced, could probably assume that I was a virgin, and yet he still was ready to just leave me as soon as the deed was done!
I know I know.. it's my fault I let it happen, but that still doesn't make it hurt any less. I thought he was changing! And he was! At least in how he treated me the past couple of days.
I guess that was all an act too. An act just to get in my pants god I'm such an idiot!
I could feel wetness welling up in my eyes which was luckily disguised by the rain that was now pouring down.
"Nothings wrong with me Tom, forget it." I sighed.
"I get that you're mad or whatever, but I'm serious. It's pouring outside, and it's a long walk. Let me take you back to the dorms." Toms hand was back on my shoulder, his lips pressed into a firm flat line.
I stood there for a moment, hating that he was right. I shouldn't walk home in the rain, that won't fix anything or make me any less mad.
"Fine." I brushed his hand off of my shoulder, and followed him back towards his car. Sitting inside I'm sure I'm soaking his leather seats.
Tom started the car and pulled out of the driveway. We sat in silence; Toms eyes on the road and mine stuck out the window.
"Look.. I'm not sure what I did, but I'm sorry." Toms voice came out quietly, like a child who was scolded.
I'm so conflicted.
Technically I have no right to be directly mad at him. I did agree to this and now I'm facing the consequences of my own actions. It still sucks though; Just because it's normal for Tom to fuck and leave doesn't make it any less shitty, or make it hurt any less.
"It's fine. It's my fault, just forget it. Thank you for taking me home."
"Of course. I'll see you later?" He asked hopeful, almost making me believe it was genuine.
"Sure Tom. Bye" I waved a hand closing the door and running through the rain back into the dorms.
Once inside I found Natalie and Bill lounging on her bed. They had a laptop playing a movie and were cuddled up all cute and cozy. I felt bad for Bill, does he not know the shady bitch that his girlfriend is?
"Oh my god babe you're soaked! Where have you been?" Natalie's voice of concern rang through my ears.
I felt disgruntled with her. She controls Bill, she controls Tom, and she's trying to control me. Fuck her!
"I was with Tom." I said casually, hoping to stir some jealousy in her.
"Oh."
My back was turned but I smirked, knowing that tone of voice meant she was bothered. I opened my dresser pulling out a towel and a dry change of clothes.
"What'd y'all do?" Masking her jealousy as a casual curiosity. How does Bill not see this?
"Not much." I tried to be vague.
"Ohhh come on tell us the juicy deets." She wiggled an eyebrow, clutching onto a smiling Bill.
I shrugged, "We fucked."
I almost wanted to laugh at the expression on both of their faces. It was identical, their eyes wide, mouths lightly hung open.
"Damn, I didn't expect that so soon from you Bella, good job." Bill gave me a thumbs up. I chuckled lightly, gathering my clothes and things.
I didn't miss Natalie's glare. I wouldn't be surprised if steam started gushing off of her head.
"Thanks Bill." I chirped, "I'm gonna go shower." I spoke leaving the room before Natalie said anything.
—
When I returned back to our room Bill was gone, and Natalie was sitting on her bed just staring off into space. She looked up once I got back into the room.
"Did you seriously not listen to anything I said?" She asked, seemingly mad.
"And I'm supposed to just blindly listen to you because?" I was being snarky.
Natalie scoffed, "He hurt you didn't he? I saw your face when you first walked in. That wasn't the face of someone who gleefully lost their virginity."
I swallowed, trying not to show that she was partially right. I hate that she's right.
"Whatever else happened with Tom and I is none of your business. Actually, it's weird that you care so much." I sat on the edge of my bed, crossing my arms.
"Weird? You're my friend and I'm looking out for you. why the fuck would that be weird?"
I smiled out of anger; this bitch is crazy!
"It's weird because you're not looking out for me. You're looking out for yourself and whatever obsession you have with Tom."
"Tom! Ha! Are you crazy? I'm literally dating Bill."
"Then why did you interrupt Tom and I the other day?"
"Because Bill needed help!" She threw her arms out dramatically.
"Tom said Bill was passed out."
"Well.. he was but, he still needed help!" She was frantically trying to defend herself, walking right into my trap.
"Okay sure. So why did you tell Tom that I left?" I raised an eyebrow.
Natalie was fumbling her words, not able to come up with anything else to say. I felt pity for her.. almost.
"Whatever!! I'm not gonna sit here and let you accuse me of some crazy shit. I'm going to Bills." She stood promptly finding her keys, and slamming the door on the way out.
I huffed put a breath I didn't know I was holding, and placed a hand to my chest in an attempt to steady my raging heart. I'm not good with confrontation, and today has been a lot of that.
I laid down in bed counting my breaths, and trying to let go of all the stress from today.
I found myself thinking of Tom; My heart swelled at the good memories, and then shattered when I remembered the bad parts.
First he almost stood me up, making me wait over thirty minutes for him. Then after taking my virginity he totally threw me to the side. That was just today; he's been a total jackass since I met him and I'm over it! I'm over Tom.. I'm over Natalie.
——
"Hello?" The short blonde boy, I now know as Gustav waved a hand in front of my face.
"What? Oh.. shit sorry. What we're you saying?" I bit my lip, feeling guilty for totally zoning out on him.
"You're good." He smiled briefly, "so here's the button you press for espresso, which is the base to most drinks.." he continued to explain the workings of the machine to me, but I couldn't focus very well.
It's been a week since my argument with Natalie, and my encounter with Tom. I haven't seen either of them all week. Not in class, not at the dorm. It's been like a ghost town. I was almost worried that they all took off and disappeared!
I applied to the coffee shop a few days ago, and got a callback yesterday evening telling me to start this morning. It's exciting! I should be excited, but I can't stop thinking about Tom. Is it embarrassing for me to say I miss him, the feel of his lips, the way his voice sounds.
So depressing! Poor Bella has a sad little crush on Tom that infamous playboy.
"And then here are all the syrups." Gustav snapped me back into reality again pointing to the cleanly labeled pump bottles.
I nodded trying my best to pay more attention when the bells chimed signaling a customer.
"You think you can take this one?" He asked.
"Y-yea, sure!" I was nervous, but I guess I have to get this over with.
Smoothing a hand over my apron I turned to greet the guest. "What can I get for yo.."
Georg, with Tom standing behind him oblivious.
"Oh hey! I didn't know you worked here." He smiled warmly, alerting Tom who looked up an unreadable expression on his face.
"Yea!" I shuffled nervously, "Today's my first day actually."
"Ohh okay, I'll go easy on you then." He winked, causing me to flush a little.
"I appreciate it, what will you have?"
"Hmm.. just a small coffee. No creme, two sugar. Tom? What do you want?" He turned his head lightly to Tom, who stepped forward so they were standing evenly at the counter.
"Hey sexy, small coffee. Black." A heat shot straight to my stomach.
No! Stop thinking that way.
"Yes sir." I smiled nonchalantly typing their order into the machine.
Gustav was hovering behind me making sure I was doing everything correct. I left the register and walked over to the machine looking to him for help.
"You got it" he encouraged.
I quickly prepared their drinks, grabbing a sharpie I wrote their names on the cups.
Thomas :|
Georg :)
I gave them both an award winning smile handing them both their cups.
Georg inspected his cup with a smile, while Toms lips fell flat.
"That's not my name."
"I know." I shrugged, hiding a sly smile.
"What time do you get off today Bella?" Georg asked grinning wide.
"I'm just training so I should be done in.." I glanced over to Gustav.
"She'll be done in an hour." He answered for me. I mouthed thank you in his direction receiving a nod of recognition in return.
"We're having a bonfire tonight, you wanna come with me?"
I was surprised at Georgs sudden advance, and so was Tom who's eyes were wide although he didn't say anything; I could tell his jaw was clenched.
Hmmm.. maybe I should give him a taste of his own medicine.
"Yea I'd love that."
——
Love you guys <3