"No, that wasn't the purpose of the visit, but it was nice to get those snapshots." He stopped smiling and his tone was serious as he said, "I came to apologise. I never meant to hurt you." He took his mug to the sink and rinsed it. He did it automatically, as if he was comfortable in her company. Grace thought he looked so at home as he glanced around for a tea towel. Grace handed him the floral cotton sheet that hung on a peg by the door. It seemed such a natural thing to do. She felt part of a contradictory dilemma, nervous of him and natural with him.
"You've apologised." She reminded him, as she backed away again, putting distance between them.
He had his back to her as he placed the cup back in the cupboard he'd seen her get the mugs from earlier, "And I came to ask for a favour." He squared his shoulders, she noticed the action and braced herself for the words she knew were to come. His shirt stretched and she found herself focussing on his broad back. Waiting, waiting. Joshua wasn't aware of her reaction, he was too busy preparing himself for one of the biggest gambles of his life. Silently and mentally he ran through his plan of action again and then he turned to face her.
From the look on his face, she could tell that he was having difficulty saying what he had to say. She decided to help him out, "Like keep out of your way." She responded softly, "I'm a quick learner." she added when he still hadn't spoken. "That shouldn't be too hard." Briefly she held his stare, and then nerves took over, "I don't usually make such an ass of myself, but around you I seem to be making a habit of it," She knew she was rambling, but the way he was looking at her made her loose track. She walked over to the sink, the pretence of washing up her cup did nothing to stop her babbling. "It's ok. Normally, I'm quite well behaved." She rinsed the cup. "I know you don't think so, but I was invited to your party, so I came. It was a mistake. I won't be repeating it." She put the clean cup on the drainer, and turned to face him. He was watching her intently. So she rattled on, "So, yes, I should be able to keep out of your way. You should have just phoned, I...."
"Grace." He interrupted her and his tone had made her freeze in mid action. "Would you come to a River boat party with me?"
She was rendered speechless for a few seconds. His lips quirked at her. She looked bewildered. She gradually got over the shock, closed her mouth, and pulled together some degree of composure, but her eyes remained puzzled. Was he having her on? She looked directly into his eyes. He looked straight back. Sanguine jade eyes met and held suspicious deep brown eyes. Her forehead furrowed, "What?"
"Will you come to a party with me?"
"Why?"
He couldn't really be asking her out, could he? No, no, that was impossible. The last thing he'd want. Go out with her? Fat chance. No, there was something else behind this. But what? Some plan to get even? No. Her mind raced on and on as she thought about his unexpected question. Why was he asking her out? He came to stand in front of her.
"I'd like to get to know you." He made it sound plausible. Almost conceivable, but, not probable enough. She recalled the party, and instantly she was incensed.
"Get real." She stormed, when her over sensitive brain had assured her that this was about as likely as a whale walking across a desert. "A week ago I was a flea infested termite as far as you and your friends were concerned. Come to think of it, you'd have preferred a termite." She worked hard to get herself back in control. "It would have been less work dealing with a termite. Instead of trying to throw me out you could have simply stamped on me." She banked her fury as she added unhappily. "Come to think of it, you did." She took a deep breath as she fought for composure. "I'm not that gullible." She stepped past him and headed for the tea towel, muttering angrily, "Stupid may be, but my memory is pretty good."
He followed her. Plan A wasn't going down too well. She was still hurting from his tongue lashing of a week ago. She clearly hadn't forgiven or forgotten. "I don't think you're gullible or stupid." He told her realising that he'd blown it.
She pivoted quickly, it brought her within two inches of him, and then she snapped, "Then don't treat me like a fool." Why the hell was she so mad? So he was coming on over the top, but it was no big deal. No big deal at all. Her eyes flashed sending furious sparks flaming toward him.
She was beautiful, but she was also very, very, angry. Joshua recognised the signals. He'd seen them before, just before she'd hit him. He moved out of range. With the space of a few feet between them, he carefully and quickly rethought plan A. Cautiously he considered his next few words. He took his time. He walked even further away from her to stand by the open back door. He needed something that was akin to emotional blackmail because she certainly wasn't buying his honesty.
With his back to her he said, "It's a favour, to Craig actually."
It was a lie. A little white lie, but he hoped it would work. She clearly wasn't buying the line that he was interested in her, yet, that was the truth. He was. He was interested. Seriously interested. In fact he'd never been more serious in his entire life. If only he'd realized that before he'd let his mouth go into overdrive at his party, if only...
Grace deflated like a stabbed balloon. It would be, wouldn't it. Half of her wanted him to plead with her. She wanted him to tell her that he really was attracted to her. Her pessimistic half reminded her that she wasn't in his league. She recalled his party. Damn but it hurt. He could have pretended he liked her, just for a while. Just for the date. Even though she had expected him to have an ulterior motive it still hurt to hear it. She felt her eyes smart. She was not going to cry. Not now, later maybe, but not now. Please not now. It wasn't a big deal. Hell, it wasn't even a small deal, it was nothing. Nothing. So why was she struggling to hold back tears? She wasn't a weepy sort. She never cried. Never. It wasn't as if she was short of dates. So why was this so painful?
"I'm tired of doing people favours." She murmured in a gloomy whisper. Her body language conveyed dejection. She struggled to put the whole situation into perspective.
"I told Craig I'd ask you." Another white lie. "He thinks it could convince Lysette." He shrugged. He tried to make it sound realistic. To his own ears it seemed like a woefully inadequate reason to ask someone on a date. To her ears it sounded as if he had been forced into it.
"What about you?" She got herself under control.
"Me?" He shrugged his shoulders, "What about me?" "You love her."
He shook his head before he spoke. "I've never loved her."
"Then why were you getting drunk at her wedding?" She questioned indignantly. "I saw you. You were upset when she got married."
"Because I knew she was marrying Craig for the wrong reasons. And without it looking like a case of sour grapes, or even arrogance, there was nothing I could do about it." He sounded so matter of fact, he almost convinced Grace. Almost.
"I don't see why it has to be me." Graced changed track.
He turned around, and by this time, Grace had herself under control, there was no outward evidence of her inner urge to cry.
"A week ago we gave a very public demonstration of, er, our affection for each other. Prior to that you were with me at the wedding, we left together and early. If I turned up with another woman, she'd just think I am playing the field. If I showed up with you,...." He let the sentence trail off and watched the effect his words had on Grace. He noticed every nuance she tried to hide. He had a feeling that she was about to cry. But he dismissed the notion. That wasn't her style. He remembered her in his study. Arguementative. Obstinate. Feisty. But no tears.
"I don't go to Goan parties, I'm a disaster at them." Grace prevaricated with a hint of theatrics.
"It isn't a Goan party. It's hosted every year by one of the companies I do business with." He could bat down that objection easily. " It's to raise funds for charity, the homeless actually." That was the truth. She saw it his eyes.
"I can't." She dropped eye contact.
"Why?" He crowded her personal space by coming up close. "I can't." She inched away.
"Don't you believe in the sacrament of marriage?" Using his index finger he tipped her chin up, so that she had to look at him and his eyes held her gaze.
"Yes, I do." She admitted then twisted out of his grip. Quickly she moved further away, she kept the breakfast bar between them.
"Enough to help your friend try to keep his marriage intact?" He came round the bench and stood beside her.
"This has nothing to do with that." She backed against the wall. Trapped with the bench beside her, the wall behind her, he stood in front of her and braced an arm on the bench and wall. Effective. Very effective. She retreated and found herself pressed against the wall.
"Hasn't it?" He asked softly.
"No." It was the merest whisper. But he heard the word. "Convince me."
"You're crowding me." She complained. He removed his arm from the bench. But he didn't move away. Firm but gentle fingers cupped her chin, forcing her to look at him again.
"Why can't you go to the party with me Grace?" His words were gentling, encouraging. His eyes were hopeful.
"Pride." She whispered woefully.
"Pride?" He repeated, milling the word over in his mind.
"And embarrassment."
That threw him. "You'd be embarrassed to be seen with me?" He stepped back in surprise. Embarrassed to be with him. Embarrassed? He shook his head as if that would clear the sudden haze.
Grace smiled at his reaction. He looked poleaxed by the thought. He actually believed she'd be embarrassed to be seen with him. "No, of course not." She denounced, as if it was his fault, "But I did make a total ass of myself at your party." She reminded him ruefully and couldn't help some of her chagrin from showing. Relief blazed through his eyes, Grace chuckled. He really wasn't as confident as he made out. That reminded her of the confident facade she often employed. Perhaps they had something in common after all.
"If that's all," and Grace could hear the relief in his voice, "it isn't a problem." He hauled her to him, resting his hip against the bench, he laced his arms around her waist saying, and "The only people from the party will be Craig, Lysette, Zac and Luke." Joshua was appeased. It wasn't him. For a while there he thought he'd blown it. Grace extricated herself from his embrace and reviewed her earlier notion. Nothing wrong with his self confidence. That had been one smooth move. She'd barely registered his movement and before she could blink he had her in his arms. Very smooth.
It was his turn to smile. "Grace, why are you always running away from me?" He teased as he felt the tension drain away.
She ignored the remark, "OK." She told him, "I'll go."
Once more, she surprised him but he laughed happily at her. "Are you ever predictable?" She smiled provocatively and shrugged. "I'll pick you up around eight, ok, next Saturday?" He told her.
"Fine." But having agreed to go, she was now having second thoughts. What had she done? So much for keeping out of his way. Joshua could see her inner debate and knew she was building up to changing her mind. He preempted that.
"You can't back out now Grace." He stated firmly but gently.
"I wasn't going to." She prevaricated and threw in a ruse to cover her tracks. "I was just wondering whether I had anything suitable to wear."
Dark brown eyebrows rose in subtle judgment and he poked his tongue into his cheek to stop him saying something stupid.
"I mean, you haven't said whether it is really formal or just formal." She tailed off lamely, knowing that he had rumbled her lie. Subterfuge had never been her forte.
"Black tie." He enlightened her affably. He could afford to be affable, she had agreed to go on a date with him. There was hope for him yet. He just had to make sure he didn't blow it.
"Oh." She threw him a synthetic smile. Joshua grinned at her.
"I must be going." He said, "And you still have a lawn to mow." He reminded her as he walked to the door.
Grace snorted "Typical," She challenged indulgently. "I thought you'd at least offer to do it." She shuffled her feet back into her trainers. Joshua stopped and turned back to face her.
"I was going to, but I figured your feminist ideals would prevent you from accepting." He charged amicably, waited for her to join him on the pathway.
"Well you could have offered." She feigned reproach as they walked together toward the front of the house.
"Would you like me to do the lawn?" His eyes glinted in teasing question as they reached his car.
"Not now, thanks." She told him flippantly, coming to stand beside his car.
He laughed, "I'll see you Saturday." He pulled open the door and got in. Then Joshua left, smiling as he drove off down the drive. It might not have been his original plan, but it had worked. She was going on a date with him. That was the crucial part of plan A. Now to work on his next strategy.
Grace watched him leave, her lower lip caught between her teeth as she worried about the date. Why the hell had she agreed to go out with him? So far their every encounter had been disastrous. Unmitigated disasters, in which she was usually the one left emotionally shattered. Why would she put herself through that again?
By Tuesday morning, Joshua was tired of waiting for Saturday to arrive. Normally a patient man he found waiting one week to see her again, was one week too long. Much too long. He needed to see her now.
Finally he phoned a firm in Hamilton. He was in the middle of some consultancy work for them. It didn't take much to organise a visit. Twenty minutes later, he had the first phase of his plan in place. He had arranged to meet one of the company directors at eleven the next morning.
Now he had an excuse to see her, he was in the area, on business. After all, Zac had been to her office, surely she wouldn't mind seeing Joshua. He grinned to himself. Why was he having to find excuses to see her? Why was he so scared she might not want to see him? Why couldn't he just phone her and ask her out to lunch? Joshua doubted it would have been that simple. She would have made it difficult. He was going to go for the casual, just passing by routine.
He had his arguments and reasons rehearsed and ready when he drove to the University. It was a wide spread campus, with several gates to the site. Which one did he take to get to her building? If Zac could find it so could he.
Finally he settled for the gymnasium car park. He asked a couple of students for directions and realised that he was at the opposite end to the building he needed. Typical. He asked about parking. They told him all the car parks at the opposite end filled early, rarely had available spaces and it would probably be a good idea to leave his car and walk. It would only take him fifteen minutes, if that, and it would probably take that long to find a car parking space. He walked.
The campus was spacious and the buildings modern. Following the directions they gave him, he walked past the Marae on campus and then turned right to walk up a brief incline to Grace's office. He spotted the building at the crest of the hill and began to mentally rehearse the next few minutes.