Eddie's Perspective
She was throwing me off my game. The boys did not seem to notice, but I am off the ball tonight. My ability to make it through this fucking campaign is pathetic, but I couldn't help myself. I mean that breathy whisper in that goddam low seductive voice in my ear was damn sinful!
It was so hard to play it cool in the moment. The only thing that was able to bring me down from that massive turn on was remembering the kind of person she really is. She is a phony, a sellout, pathetic.
Objectively speaking, Y/n Henderson is sexy as hell. Her long legs can drive any man insane, that tight bod... Jesus H. Christ! Don't even get me started on those eyes. Fucking bright eyes that could pierce through a man's soul and for a while that worked on me, but not anymore.
Confession time. I always found Y/n hot. I noticed her long before her little twerp brother joined Hellfire. How could I not notice her? I remember seeing her my Sophomore year, tight ripped black jeans and a Def Leppard shirt that she cut into a crop top. I mean my fuck, this girl was my type to a fault.
I never really had the guts to talk to her and she was impossible to figure out. She had a few friends, no one she kept close enough to know her and she seemed to like operating under the radar.
My first day of my first Senior year I told myself I was going to muster up the courage to try to talk to her and ask her to prom, I know... me going to prom, but I liked her. Before I got the courage to talk to her I found out I was going to have to repeat Senior year again. Didn't bother me, gave me more time to think of what to say... as if three years wasn't enough time.
My second first day of Senior year I was determined. I knew I was going to see her more, and god willing have some classes with her. I spent time that morning in the parking lot pacing, waiting for her to arrive and what I saw rocked my world in the worst way!
She gets out of fucking Billy Hargrove's car! She looks different. She looks girlier and wearing all these bright colors and his fucking arm is around her waist! What the fuck happened? She never seemed like the type to date Billy fucking Hargrove.
That was the first wrong thing I assumed about her. After her brother and his friends joined Hellfire, I started getting closer to some of his other friends like Max Mayfield, Billy's sister and my neighbor, Robin Buckley, and Nancy Wheeler. Never talked to Steve Harrington even though I know how obsessed Dustin is with him. I got the weird feeling that Steve didn't like me, so I just stayed away.
Anyway, I got closer to this odd group of friends. I mean they truly were an odd mash up. I would have never placed them all together in a group, but they have this weird bond. I couldn't tell you what it is, they just are bonded.
Turns out this was also Y/n's friend group before she went all airhead cheerleader. They told me about Y/n's sudden transformation to the dark side and that is when I truly learned who she was. She wasn't a friend, she wasn't a person who cared about others. She's selfish, narcissistic, a flake, and just downright awful.
As I grew closer to that odd friend group, I saw how Y/n treated them, HORRIBLY. She never looked in their direction. She acted like they were ghosts. How could she just forget about them like that?
That is when my crush faded to hate. I can't stand her.
And before you judge me, I can still get turned on by someone I hate. She's hot alright, but I would never act on it. She is just kind of nice to look at.
I think why I could not fully focus on the campaign is because her drastic change in attitude. I know she was flirting with me to be a dick, but she has never done that before. And it was very convincing! I mean VERY!
So naturally I get more distracted when I see her leaning on the door frame of the Hellfire room, closely watching me wrap up tonight's game. I try not to look, but my god she looks good.
Her skin is glistening from sweating in cheer practice and the dim lights of the room make her skin look like it is glowing. Her long legs are crossed out in front of her and she is in the tight short shorts, so damn tight and small they could pass as underwear.
But the thing that stands out to me the most is the look on her face. She seems captivated by what I am saying, like she is hanging on to every word. I didn't want to, but her expression was priceless, so priceless that I felt a smile creep across my face.
Fuck I need to get out of here before she notices that I am smiling at her.
I leave the boys with a good cliffhanger for Friday's campaign and call it a night.
I pretend to look down at the papers in front of me as I watch Y/n walk into the room to her brother. She places a hand on his shoulder and smiles at him.
Wow, I think that is the first time this year I have seen a genuine smile from her. It is a nice smile. Much better than that fake shit eating grin she always puts on. I mean, who does she think she is fooling with that?
Most of the other club members have filtered out at the point and it is just me and the Hendersons talking quickly to each other on the other side of the room. I know I shouldn't, but I try to lean in and catch what they are saying.
Right when I think I am being discreet enough to hear, Dustin looks back at me, waves and wishes me a goodnight.
Well so much for eavesdropping.
She doesn't walk out with Dustin... She is walking towards me. What the fuck is going on? Is this a fever dream? Did I die and go to heaven... or hell, depends on what she wants.
God, she is walking to me painfully slow. It is teasing the hell out of. I try to hide my nerves as she stops by the side of my throne and her fingers play with the wood trim.
I clear my throat and try to sound calm and cool. "Did you want to talk to me?"
"Yeah, do you have a minute?"
"I can make a minute. Consider me intrigued."
I am intrigued, especially because her demeanor is so different than I am used to seeing. She almost looks like how does around Billy, timid and scared. She has a reason to be like that around him because he is a fucking savage that thinks it's ok to hurt women, but why do I make her feel that way?
Granted, I have not always been the nicest to her, but I have never given her a reason to believe that I would hurt her like her damn boyfriend does. Why does she put up with that anyway? From what Dustin has told me about her, she seemed very confident and independent... I don't see it. She lets a dude treat her like trash, and for what? To be popular... sell out.
Usually when she is around me, her eyes are squinted in anger and her nose does this cute scrunched up thing, but that is not what I am getting from her right now. Am I making her nervous?
She stumbles on her words before she can get them out in a full sentence. "So... um... seems you know how to put on a good campaign."
I chuckle at her, like she knows. "Not that you have much of a reference point, I wouldn't expect you to understand any of this... But I do try and give them a good show."
It's as if I said something that lit a fire inside of her. Her timid demeanor fades and she becomes more self-assured. She steps closer to me and leans down over me. "You shouldn't assume things Edward. Who do you think taught Dusty to play? I used to be very into it... well still am, but I don't really have a chance to do it anymore."
Fuck! Why does this woman have such a massive effect on me? It is kind of terrifying how her words can change my mood in an instant second.
Plus she used to play! Christ I find that so sexy. I bet she is confident when she plays, never questioning a decision and leads with real passion. I would kill to see her play. I don't know if I would be handle watching her though.
Something came over me. I don't know if it was how she was talking or the idea of her play DND, but something possessed me to stand up and get close to her. She didn't back away from me as I stood close to her. It looks like she likes having me this close to her.
"Interesting" I smirk at her. "So you taught the little shrimp how to play. I guess you're not the dumb cheerleader I thought you were."
I regret saying that the second it came out of my stupid mouth. Here I am trying to flirt with her and I just insulted her! Way to go Munson, you're a royal fuck up.
Much to my surprise she laughs and takes a step closer to me. I can feel her jagged breaths on my skin. I try to keep my cool as she looks up at me through her thick eyelashes. "I am full of surprises Munson... you just never cared to find out."
Well shit! I want to find out now. She is actually flirting back with my right now. I have to see where this goes. I hope it leads to what I think it will.
"Looks like my loss then. Maybe I should start now."
She bites her lip clearly feeling this chemistry between us. "I thought I was the wicked bitch of the west, why would you want to get to know me?"
Ok, now I am regretting giving her that nickname, but in my defense, it seemed funny at the time. She was kind of being a bitch, and I rarely use that term on women but I couldn't help it. She was ditching her little brother AGAIN just because King Billy has a fragile ego and has to have all the attention on him.
I definitely regret giving her that nickname now. She isn't a bitch at all. Billy made her like that because I know she wasn't always like that.
"It looks like I was wrong about you. Maybe it's your boyfriend to blame for that."
Again, I need to learn when to shut my stupid mouth. Why would I bring up her boyfriend when I am actively flirting with her? It totally killed the mood.
It was as if me mentioning Billy set off alarm bells in her head because he confident grin is replace with a look of total fear. Damn she is really scared of this dude.
She takes a step back from me and looks down at the ground. I notice she starts playing with her thumbs in her palms, and that when I see it. The proof that showed Billy Hargrove was a shit bag and Y/n was in something that she needed to get out of. A deep dark bruise wraps around her wrist with other small faint bruises going up both arms. That scum. Who does that?!
Her voice starts off shaky. " Right... that's why I wanted to talk to you. I know you're not a big fan of me, so it means a lot that you stood up for me." She notices me looking at her bruised and tries to hide her wrist from my sight. "But yeah, that what I wanted to say. I should probably go."
Go? She can't go! I don't want her to leave. As she turns around to walk out, I take her hand in mine, making a conscious effort not to touch her hurt wrist. She stops and looks back at me waiting for me to say something as I stare at how gorgeous she really is.
"I thought I hated you. I heard about what happened between you and your friends, and I thought you just bailed on them to be popular. I'm realizing now that there may be more to it than I thought." I hold her hand tighter and pull her back to me, much closer than we were before. I can feel how warm she is. Our bodies almost touching. "You don't deserve to be treated like that. You deserve to be with someone who will let you be yourself and basically worship you because you are a beautiful woman. Billy doesn't know what he has."
Basically what I am saying, I could be a better boyfriend. Let me give you what you deserve because I know how to treat a woman like you.
She gives me that damn look again that drives me wild, a confident grin while she looks up at me through those dark thick lashes. Her voice gets lower in a very sexy way that should just not even be allowed. "I'm sorry. Did I just hear that correctly? Did you, Eddie Munson, just call me... beautiful?"
Of course she is beautiful. How she could ever doubt that is beyond me. Even when I spent all that time hating her, I still found her beautiful. I thought she was beautiful the moment I saw her. I couldn't get the nerve to talk to her for three years. God, I wish I talked to her sooner. Things would be different. She wouldn't be hurt and she would be mine.
My hand lets go of hers and moves down to her hip. I softly rest my fingers there to see if she is ok with my hand there. Much to my surprise, she doesn't pull back. Does she feel what I am feeling right now?
"I did Y/n. You're also funny and witty, another thing I did not know about you. I bet the real you is much better than this person you are pretending to be. I think I'd like the real you a lot."
Holy shit it is happening. She steps closer to me, pressing her body against mine. This has to be a fever dream. There is no way she is actually standing this close to me. God I hope this is real because she feels so good against me and I would be lying if I said I have not wanted this for a long time.
My soft touch turns into a firm grip on her hip. She looks up at me smiling and biting her lip. Fuck, she looks good when she bites her lip like that. I want to feel those lips against mine. I have to follow through with this.
I lean down a bit and bring my lips close to hers. Our breaths dance together as our hearts beat collectively against our chest. I have to kiss her. I am going to show her that she can have better. I am better for her.
I am so close. I can feel my lips lightly graze over hers. My mind fogs and everything around me just goes dark. Finally this is happening.
I finally make the plunge and go in to kiss her, but I do not meet her lips. The space between us has grown and she is no longer right in front of me. I open my eyes to see her standing before me looking completely freaked out. What? There is no way I freaked her out like that.
"I should probably go! Dustin is waiting and Billy is suppose to come over."
This is a joke! She has to be joking... No? She is actually being serious! After all of that she is willing to run back to her shitty boyfriend. The same boyfriend that is responsible for all those fucking bruises!
All I feel is rage take me over. "Billy! Seriously? You're worried about Billy?" I yell.
She keeps looking behind her like she is expecting someone to come up behind her or she is just looking to escape. Either way, it is clear she does not want to be here.
"Why are you angry all of a sudden? Here I was thinking we could actually be civil towards each other!"
"If you can't see why I am angry... then maybe you are as dumb as I thought. Maybe you are exactly who I thought you were."
"Like I said, you never took the time to find out! You've just been a dick to me since you became friends with Dustin! I don't need to put up with this. I'm out of here!"
Put up with me! Like I am the bad guy here! Her threshold for what she will put up with is so fucked up it makes me furious! I cannot believe her. I know there was something between us just now and I cannot believe she is going to walk away from it for Billy Hargrove.
She starts to walk away from me and I yell out at her. I get the last word in this, not her. She needs to know that she is making the wrong choice.
"Really" I ask sarcastically. "It seems you love to put up with bull shit! That's why you let Billy treat you like shit when there are people out there that will treat you how you should be treated. I..."
I quickly stop myself from finishing that thought. I want to tell her that I would treat her how she deserves to be treated, like a goddamn princess! But there is no point in telling her that. It is a waste of air and words.
I could get down on one knee, promise to protect her and get her out of this town and she would turn it down because she wants Billy. If this is what she wants, then fine she can have it!
I notice that not finishing my thought got to her. She stops at the doorframe and turns back to me. She doesn't look angry, scared, or timid. I cannot place her expression but she tries to get me to finish that thought.
"You what Eddie?"
Like I said, waste of air and words. She made her choice and I am not what she wants, so she does not get to know that I would give her the world if I could.
I sit back down at the table and throw all my stuff in the bag. I do not even look up at her when I speak. "Forget it Henderson... It wouldn't matter anyway. You've made everything perfectly clear. You better go before Billy gets mad at you again."
I hear her footsteps run down the hallway and the door crash open to the parking lot. God that fucking hurt. That is what I get for letting my guard down around Y/n.
I couldn't jam out to my music on the way home. I spent the whole car right thinking about what just happened with Y/n. I know I am not crazy. There is something between us. We have something.
I could feel my heart drumming against my chest when she looked up at me. I could feel the air leave my lungs when she got closer to me. I can still feel the tingle on my lips from when they brushed hers. That is not hate!
What could Billy possibly give her that I couldn't? I could give her so much more than he ever could. I could make her happy. I wouldn't make her change who she was or ditch all her friends. I thought she was awesome before she started dating that ass.
I need a fucking cigarette.
Once I get home I sit outside my place and just start burning through those sons of bitches hoping it will calm me down. Of course it didn't, but I like to pretend it does. Maybe if I convince myself it doesn't bother me, then it won't. That is how that shit works, right?
I finish about half of the box when I see something that pushes me back into a fit a rage. Jason dropping Billy off, blasting that sad excuse of music! You call that rock music? I will show you real rock!
I am conflicted seeing him. Part of me is relieved that he is here and not with Y/n. I feel like I can breath a little knowing he is not kissing her and touching her or worse, hurting her.
The other part of me hates him even more now because Y/n chose him over me. He doesn't deserve her! He doesn't even deserve to look in her direction. He is not a real man. A real man does not touch a woman like that, especially if that woman is Y/n. If he thinks he is so big and bad, then why doesn't he try going after someone who can properly defend themselves! I could go right over there and punch him and show him how a real man acts! Billy is a fucking boy!
I must have been seething imagining punching Billy for a while because I snap back into it and Billy is long gone and now Max is standing in front of me. She is studying my expression trying to understand why I look so angry.
Max is a sweet kid. I honestly see a lot of myself in her. I was just like her when I was her age, sarcastic and couldn't give two fucks. I like that about her and I think that is why I find her so easy to talk to.
She finally stops studying me and speaks up. "Hey. You doing alright? You look upset?"
Dumb question. No I am not alright! Why am I not alright? Your step brother is a real dick and is getting in the way of something that could be awesome. I want to punch him in the nose. Am I going to tell her that? Christ no!
I try to play dumb. "Huh? Oh yeah, I'm perfectly fine... great actually. I don't know why you would think I wasn't. I mean look at me. Happy as can be" I fake a smile.
She rolls her eyes. "I guess I am that person everyone just lies to and says the same lame thing because Y/n basically gave me the same answer today. I'll tell you what I told her, I'll believe it when you start believing it yourself."
Damn this kid is too smart for her own good. It is kind of annoying actually.
I pick my head up when I hear her mention Y/n. Y/n said that today? It must have been when Max came running to Dustin asking for help. I wonder what happened to her to make Max, the girl who doesn't care about much, care. I want to know but I can't let Max see my interest in knowing what is going on with Y/n.
"Y/n huh?" I try to say casually. "And let me guess, she gave you the same bitchy response she always does."
"Yeah it wasn't exactly bitchy. She mainly just ignored it entirely. I kind of expected that though. I know she isn't ok and I thought maybe she would open up, but I guess Billy has had a bigger effect on her than I thought. You on the other hand, you don't have an excuse."
That doesn't make any sense. Billy I am assuming Billy wasn't around when Max talked to her, so why would she hold back? Especially if she isn't ok. None of this is making any sense!
"I don't understand. How would Billy keep her from opening up about how's she doing?"
"Well you saw how Billy was at lunch. That isn't a new thing with him. He's been treating her like that for awhile and it's made her very closed off. He has scared her to death."
"Yeah I noticed that. But I don't get it Red. If she is so scared of him, why not just leave?"
"Do you really want to know? It's a bit fucked up"
I haven't heard Max say fuck before so that I how I know it is actually going to be bad. How could it be this bad but she hasn't let him yet? I tried to show her that she could have better and she still wasn't ready to let go of him, so I am preparing to hear the worst, like he is holding her hostage or something.
"I need to know. It's been driving me crazy since I left Hellfire. She was different this evening. She seemed genuine and kind and I can't stop thinking about that girl that I was with tonight. The real Y/n, not this monster Billy created. If she is so unhappy, I need to know why she stays"
Max sits down next to me and takes a long breath. I hold my breath scared of what she is going to say. I am scared for Y/n.
"Y/n used to be that sweet and carefree person. She was just like all of us and we were inseparable. She was brave and independent! She never backed down from anything. I loved how comfortable she was with herself. She seemed so confident, especially when she was playing her guitar for us."
That is exactly the kind of girl I imagined her to be and then some. She sounds perfect! I mean there is no way she was that great. With looks like hers and a personality like that... she could have any guy she wants. Out of all those guys she picked the worst.
This still doesn't make any sense. She sounded like a strong woman, so there is no way one moron could break her down that much.
"See that's the girl I saw tonight... and I liked it. Even better that she plays guitar, so how did Billy change that?"
"He did what he does best. Billy is good at manipulating people. The first two months they were together, he treated her great. Like royalty. But it all changed once she let her guard down. I would hear him screaming at her when she would come over. He would say the worst things to her. He would say stuff like, no one will ever love her like him, he was doing her a favor being with her, she should be more grateful that he made her into a someone. He made her believe that she was unlovable. I didn't know he was physical with her until I saw her grabbing her at school."
I feel my heart break for her. She doesn't deserve that and of course none of that is true. She was doing a favor by being with him! He doesn't see how damn lucky he is to have a girl like that under his arm! I just cannot believe that she believes stuff like that. She knows her friends love her and would do anything for her. She is far from unlovable. Before Billy, she was loved and so lovable. Damn! I was crushing on her for years before Billy.
The thing that gets me that most is that today is not the first time he laid hands on her. Yeah I saw the bruises on her arms, but there is always a possibility they just have really wild sex. Hearing Max say that he actually hurts her like that makes my blood boil. I want to kill him.
My mind start to wander back to when we almost kissed. I think about all that was going on before she pulled away and that is when it hit me. I was so caught up in finally kissing her, I didn't realize the familiar voices in the background... the basketball team. That is why she looked so scared when I opened my eyes! She was scared Billy might see her.
"So she didn't want to run away from me... she was scared. She's scared of Billy. She thinks she's not worthy of positive attention."
"Exactly. I can see how miserable she is, but Billy has brainwashed her so much that she just accepts it. That's one of the reasons why I think she pushed us away. She knew we would try to get her out of it, but she doesn't want to lose the only person she thinks will ever love her."
A thousand things start racing through my mind. I cannot sit still processing all of the way I could help her. I get up and start to pace, excited at the idea that I could actually save her from this. Not just because I want to be with her, but because she needs to get out of this for her own safety.
"So what do you think would happen if someone tried to show her that there is better than Billy?"
Max smiles at me and gets up crossing her arms. She gives me a sarcastic look. "I don't know. I mean it's worth a shot, but I don't know who would do that."
"Christ, who wouldn't want to be that person. Y/n is beautiful, she's witty, she can play guitar AND DND... and all that stuff you said about her before she was with Billy... I mean come on! Who wouldn't be into that?"
I might as well hold a sign over my head that has in big letters I LIKE Y/N! I am exposing my own feelings at this point. I am just rambling about how amazing she is, but she is... And she wants out of this. She might like me too.
Ok I am getting a bit ahead of myself, but she makes me excited. I feel stupid that all these months of arguing boils down to a simple misunderstanding. I just need to play this cool around Max and work on an idea in my own time. I love Red, but I don't need a fourteen year old girl meddling in my love life.
"Kind of sounds just like your type... maybe you should go for it Eddie"
"Me? Good one Red! We hate each other. That would never work out! Nope! Not happening..."
"Right! What was I thinking? Maybe Gareth would be a better option for her anyway" she teases.
Not funny! I don't appreciate the joke. I may have been a coward the first time around but not this time. I am not going to just let Gareth swoop in and steal her from me. She likes me. She wants me!
"Gareth? Are you fucking kidding me? Like he would know how to handle a woman like Y/n! He is not the right choice... He can't have her!"
I have definitely given myself away at this point. I literally just told Max that he cannot have her! I am a little ashamed of myself for saying that. It is gross now that I hear it out loud. She is not some object that people can have. She is person with feelings and desires.
Sure if she wants to be with Gareth it would hurt, but at least I could feel at ease knowing she is safe with someone who would not hurt her. More than anything, I just want her to be safe and happy. I need her to be happy.
"Awfully defensive there for someone who hates her. Maybe you should reevaluate your feelings a bit. That doesn't look like hate to me. So I'll just let you think about that on your own, and in the meantime I'm going to bed. See you tomorrow Eddie."
Max walks back to her place like she is the queen of the world. Yeah she has me figured out, but whatever. It is not like she knows exactly how I feel. She probably just thinks I have a little crush on Y/n. Nothing wrong with a harmless crush.
I don't know why it bothers me so damn much and I know Max was just trying to piss me off, but the idea of Gareth and Y/n dating makes me sick. I know I just said that I want her to be happy, but blame the hormones or something because something in my wants to make her all mine.
"Gareth! Yeah right. Like I'd let Gareth take her from me."