A/N Hello my lovlies! I told you this story wasn't finished! Sorry it took so long. I knew what I wanted to happen in this chapter but it just wouldn't work for me. Finally I just sat down and let it write itself and this is what came out. Thank my coven of witches for this as their encouragement (not to mention their amazing writings!) were key to me writing. As always I do not know or own the real people these characters represent, this is fiction from my own mind, more's the pity. Feedback fuels my soul more than you will ever know and pushes me to write faster. If you wish to be alerted when I update any of my works, follow _eyes_wideshut on twitter. I hope you enjoy.
A few weeks went by without time to do anything to expand their relationship. They seemed to always be busy but that was the life of a kpop star. Jisung couldn't keep his eyes off Minho during dance practice and started having to watch Hyunjin or Felix because if he watched Minho he lost all focus. Jisung accepted that as his new normal after all he was talented and distracting.
His boyfriend was hot as hell and the way he moved when he danced, he flowed and it was sexy as hell. He gulped water on their break and finally locked eyes with his boyfriend and the asshole winked. He knew exactly what he was doing to Jisung. Minho was usually textbook perfect when they practiced, spending more time watching the rest to put the flair into the dancing he did on stage. But now he was hip thrusting and body rolling right along with Hyunjin. And the jerk, who knew how Jisung felt about those glorious thighs, took every opportunity to flex them and run a hand over them while he danced. He had even taken to wearing shorts more often. Jisung knew he was in hell, but man the view was worth it.
When a month had gone by without any quality time between them, Minho started to get concerned. Not because they hadn't advanced at all but because Jisung seemed to be running himself too hard. They were preparing for a comeback and Minho had watched the circles under his eyes grow. When Jisung had woken him five days in a row crawling into his bed and had been gone before Minho's alarm sounded; the older man decided he had enough and made arrangements with Chan that Jisung would be off the next Saturday, insisting that he needed it. Additionally, he made plans for Hyunjin to spend the night in Felix's room citing a need for Jisung to rest.
On Friday, after practice and showers, Jisung joined Chan and Changbin hyungs in the studio to work on some flows. They worked through dinner and Jisung didn't get back to the dorm until late. He had gotten a text from Minho asking him to come to his dorm for the night so he grabbed his backpack and threw some clothes in it and toiletries and then headed down the block to the other dorm. Jisung let himself in and stopped short when he entered the room Minho shared with Hyunjin.
Minho was tacking black curtains up to his bunk. "Hyung?" Jisung said questioningly.
Minho turned and smiled at him. "Hey Sungie." He walked over and kissed Jisung gently. "I was just giving us some privacy." He went back to his bunk to finish. "Last week you seemed pretty shy about doing anything with me and mentioned you wished we could sleep naked to have the skin to skin comfort. I honestly miss sleeping naked so I decided to put up these curtains to give us some privacy."
"Hyung!" Jisung grinned. "This is great!" Jisung approached him and touched his neck gently. "Thank you for this." He said the last softly. Minho looked up at him, his eyes sparkling in the way that always made Jisung's breath catch just a bit. He saw Minho's eyes drop slightly to his lips and he unconsciously licked them. "We haven't had much time together lately have we?" His voice a hushed whisper.
"No." Minho said with a bit of a smirk but it softened into a fond smile. "Chan has given us tomorrow off when I told him how little you have been sleeping lately. I have some food to warm up for you and I thought we could watch Howl's Moving Castle and do some cuddling. Sound good?" He bit his lip a bit which signaled to Jisung that he wasn't as confident as he appeared.
"Sounds amazing." Jisung reassured him. "Mind if I take a shower first?"
Minho's nervous smile became a real one. "Of course. I'll finish this up and go heat up the food and be ready for you. Go relax and shower and get comfy."
"Thank you." Jisung said and leaned in to kiss him gently before going to gather his shower things and head to the bathroom.
Minho finished tacking up the curtains and then headed into the kitchen. He heated up the dish he had made earlier and put the chicken in the air fryer to crisp back up. Jisung emerged just as he was plating their dinner and Minho looked at him for a moment. He knew Jisung had no idea how beautiful Minho found him. This was how Minho liked him best. Sleeveless shirt showing off those muscular pecs Jisung worked hard for from the side, a pair of gray sweatpants that clung to his legs; hair wet and just brushed back and face clean of makeup. This was his Sungie, not the idol Han. He gave a tender smile. "You're beautiful." he said softly and Jisung looked up in surprise.
"Huh?" He said a bit dumbfounded.
Minho's smile grew. "You're beautiful," he repeated. "Now sit. I have the food."
He carried the bowls to the table and set one in front of Jisung. Jisung watched him sit before looking down and he froze."Baby!" He said in surprise. "Is this nasi lemak?" He asked excitedly and leaned over the bowl, inhaling deeply the subtle scent of coconut and rice along with the cuttlefish chili, small fried anchovies, spices and pickled vegetables. The look on Jisung's face was one Minho couldn't read and he got a little nervous.
"You've been working so hard and burning the candle at both ends lately so I wanted you to have some comfort food and a relaxing night." He said in explanation. "You had talked about nasi lemak once and how you craved it when you were stressed." His voice dropped. "Is it ok that I made it?" His voice held a tone of worry.
"Is it ok?" Jisung repeated in a tone of shock. "Jigaya, this is so amazing! Where did you find it?"
"I made it."
Jisung's eyes grew huge. "You...you MADE this?" Minho nodded with a blush. "You made a comfort food I mentioned in passing once from my childhood?" Minho's blush grew.
"You've been working really hard lately." He said softly "You haven't been sleeping enough or relaxing at all. I wanted to be sure you had some time to relax. I wanted to make something special to help." Jisung's eyes glowed a bit wetly. "Jigaya, please don't cry." Jisung's lip wobbled a bit, overcome with emotions at Minho's thoughtfulness. "Please, just eat and let's have a good night."
Jisung took a deep breath pulling himself together and nodded. He picked up one of the chicken wings and took a bite and hummed appreciatively before spooning up some of the nasi lemak and topping it with some of the anchovies and vegetables and a dab of the chili. When he took the bite, his eyes slid closed in joy as the comforting flavors exploded on his tongue. Minho watched him with a smile.
They dug in and quietly enjoyed the meal. Minho could see the tension slowly melting off of Jisung as they ate and he felt no pressure to converse or to be Han. Here he could just be Hannie, Minho's Jigaya. He watched the color come back into Jisung's face and his eyes, which had been so dull for the last week, filled with life again. They ate until their bellies hurt with fullness. Together they cleaned up and hand in hand headed to the bedroom. They crawled behind the curtains and Jisung grinned as he saw that the laptop had been set up to where they could snuggle and both see the screen.
Minho started Howl playing and lay back, pulling Jisung into his arms. Jisung rested his head on Minho's chest and snuggled in. They relaxed and enjoyed the first bit together. Minho's hands gently stroked Jisung's back under his shirt and Jisung sighed happily.
An hour in, Jisung interrupted the silence. "Min?" He said softly. Minho hummed to show he was listening. "Can we..."
Minho turned his attention to Jisung who was looking down at him. "What is it, Sungie?" He asked, his free hand reaching up to touch the other man's cheek.
"I want to try more." Jisung said softly. "Would you show me how it could be between us? I want to feel you."
"Are you sure, Sungie?" Minho asked worriedly. "You don't have to do this. If you want to, I will bottom if you are determined to go that far...." His voice trailed off. "I mean that's what it sounds like you are saying that's what you want." His tone one more asking then telling.
Jisung smiled and nuzzled his face in Minho's chest. "That is what I want, I think. But I don't want to top. I want to feel us. Me being the bottom feels more right to me. I want to know it all." his fingers tightened on Minho's shirt, pulling him closer. "You make me feel things. I want to feel it all. I trust you. I want this but I'm also a little scared."
"Jigaya," His tone was so gentle and full of affection. "I would do anything you asked of me and take it as slow as you want. If you are sure you want to do this. I will take good care of you, I promise."
"I know you will. I trust you."
No more words were needed. Their eyes were locked on one another as they slowly undressed each other. Gentle caresses and kisses followed as they settled into place. Minho gently rolled Jisung onto his back and his hands gently pushed his loves legs apart as he settled onto his knees between the beautiful spread thighs below him. He reached for the lube in his drawer and came back with it.
He poured a bit of the lube on his fingers and rubbed them, warming it slightly. "I'm going to take my time prepping you since you have never done anything like this before. It will be weird at first and then it will burn and hurt a bit as the stretching happens. I promise I will make it feel as good as I can and if you want to change your mind at any time, just tell me." Jisung nodded. "Jigaya?" Minho's tone was soft but serious and Jisung met his eyes. "I'm serious. I will stop, no hesitation, no anger. If you want it to stop please ask. It would hurt me to know you went along with it to please me. Ok?"
Jisung swallowed hard and nodded. "I promise Min."
"Ok, just lay back and try to relax. The more you relax the less it will hurt." Jisung nodded but looked anything but relaxed. Minho kissed Jisung's knee and his mouth moved up Jisung's thigh as his fingers gently circled the rim. Jisung gasped a bit at the initial feeling but when there was no pain his body slowly relaxed. As Minho moved his finger around the opening he moved a little closer each time, keeping Jisung focused on his lips moving over the inner thigh. With a slight push, he slid the first finger slowly in. Jisung tensed for a moment but there was no pain so he didn't take long to relax. "Is it ok?" Minho asked.
"Weird." Jisung said softly. "Just weird but doesn't hurt."
Minho nodded and began to gently pump his finger, moving it around to find that little bundle of nerves. He knew he hit the right spot when Jisung gasped, his hip jutted up for a second and his ass clamped down on Minho. "What was that?" He cried out softly.
"Before we got to the pain, I wanted to show you what the pleasure part will feel like. Try to remember this part, ok?" Jisung nodded frantically at his words. Minho's mouth closed over him as a second finger began to breach him. It wasn't the most comfortable feeling in the world. He got the burning but no real pain and Minho's mouth on his dick while he finger brushed that spot made him moan.
Minho took his time, seeming to take hours to stretch him and work him up, adding more lube as he went. Jisung looked down at what should have been an obscene view of Minho between his legs, fingers buried within him as his mouth brought such pleasure. It should have been obscene but instead I was the most beautiful sight Jisung had ever seen. He panted with want and desire pooled in his belly. He had been so nervous and he still was but more than the nerves, he wanted to be with Minho, just like this. He wanted to fuze them together and for them to be one. He wanted to belong to Minho, he longed for it desperately. "Please Min." he begged softly. "Need you."
"I've got you baby." Minho whispered. Jisung almost cried when the fingers left him but Minho was simply pulling on a condom and picking up the lube bottle. Jisung took it from him and poured some into his own hand and moving to Minho's cock. As his boyfriend kissed him, he coated the condom with lube until Minho's hand stopped him.
"Feels so good Jigaya but much more and I won't be able to do what you want."
Jisung bit his lip and nodded, removing his hand. Minho looked at him. "On your hands and knees will be the least painful for the first time..." But Jisung shook his head.
"Want to see you. Need to see you." Jisung moaned. Minho nodded. He moved into position. He kissed Jisung as tenderly as he could and slowly pushed his way in; giving shallow thrusts to seat him a bit more with each movement forward. Jisung bit his own lip hard and his body tensed and his eyes teared just before he closed them and Minho froze.
"Jigaya, I'll stop." Minho said in a panic but Jisung frantically shook his head no. "But I'm hurting you."
"I'll be ok." Jisung said in a strained voice. "I need you." His eyes opened and Minho saw the pain in his eyes but he also saw desire and that settled him a bit. "I want this, Min."
Minho swallowed hard and nodded with wide eyes. He leaned forward and kissed Jisung gently as he resumed working his way in as gently as he could. When he was finally all the way in he stilled and spent time kissing and caressing Jisung. Finally Jisung took a shuddering breath and looked up at him. Minho looked down at him and thought nothing had ever been more beautiful to him than Jisung laying below him. "You ok jigaya?"
"I'm ok. It's easing off. I'm ready." Jisung smiled up at him.
"Ok." Minho started gently rocking his hips, so focused on Jisung that he wasn't really paying attention to how it felt for himself. He moved his thigh slightly when he started to feel the muscle tensing and that changed his angle. He heard Jisung let out a moan and his eyes rolled back. "Feel good jigaya?"
"Yeeess." Jisung whined out. "Oh fuck, Min." Minho smiled and finally relaxed knowing Jisung was enjoying what he was doing. He held up Jisung's legs to enable him to brush that spot as much as possible. Gripping Jisung's hips he began to pull them to meet his thrust. "Min, it feels so good." Jisung moaned, his hands grabbing at anything he could reach. Minho moved faster, finally registering the tight warmth around him and how good his love felt around him.
"Sungie, you feel so good baby." His hand reached out to stroke Jisung.
"Min! Min I'm gonna cum." Jisung warned.
"It's ok jigaya, cum for me." Minho reassured him.
Jisung looked up at him, pupils blown wide and he bit down on his bottom lip as he rushed over the edge of his orgasm. He cried out and his body clamped down Minho, spasming through the orgasm, his seed spilling over Minho's hand and his own stomach. Minho's hips stuttered twice and with a groan he followed."Sungie!" He collapsed on top of Jisung kissing his neck.
They lay together, letting their orgasms fade. Where Jisung's hands had been frantically grasping at him, they now gently smoothed over Minho's shoulders and back. Minho held the base of the condom and slowly withdrew, Jisung wincing as he did. "I'm sorry baby." he whispered. "But I need to get rid of this before it makes a mess. Wait here and I'll bring you something to clean up."
He got up and disposed of the condom. He went into the bathroom and cleaned himself up. Then he got a cloth and used warm water, wringing it out a bit. He brought it back to Jisung. "Roll onto your belly Jigaya, let me clean you up." Jisung smiled and did as he asked. Minho tried to be as gentle as possible as he cleaned him up. He got rid of the towel into his hamper and crawled in next to Jisung. "Was it ok, Sungie?" He asked quietly.
Jisung snuggled up to him and Minho wrapped his arms around him. "It was perfect, Min."
"It didn't hurt too much?"
"A little but it felt really good too. Maybe next time it won't hurt as much. That's what Felix said anyway."
"Next time? There will be a next time?" Minho asked a bit nervously. Jisung looked up at him with a tender smile.
"Of course there will, Min. This wasn't a one time thing....uh..." his expression grew pensive. "I mean unless you want it to be."
"No!" Minho responded quickly. "No. I don't want this to be a one time thing." he added, voice much softer. "Are you hurting now?"
"No. I'm sore but it's ok." Jisung smiled at him. "My mouth hurts though. I need kisses," he said with a slight teasing pout on his lips.
Minho's answering smile was so full of fondness. "You are adorable." He said. He kissed Jisung, putting all the emotion he couldn't say into the kiss. Jisung melted into him.
It wasn't long before Jisung drifted off to sleep, his body overcome with the exhaustion of the stress he had been under lately and the physical exertions of the night. Minho couldn't stop staring at him. "I'm so in love with you." He whispered. "I would do anything and be anyone you want. I wish I could tell you what you mean to me." Jisung smacked his lips in his sleep and snuggled in closer to Minho's neck. It was a long time before Minho could stop watching him sleep and actually sleep himself.