Inis akong bumalik sa loob ng bahay at umupo nalang sa dining room, hinihintay na i-serve nila ang dinner.
Bumalik na din ang dalawa mayamaya. Katelyn was staring at me, then she would look back at Zayden. Si Zack naman ay tahimik lang din. Our parents were the only ones who were talking the entire time.
"Time for dessert! I can't wait to taste your cakes, Celestine! I often visit your café and I love your pastries so much!" excited na sabi ni Tita Alice.
I just smiled a bit while my mom asked for our housemaids to serve the cakes.
"Oh my gosh, it's so pretty, anak." Mommy said when the big cake was out of the box.
"I hope you'll like it." I said and started slicing it to serve them. "This is chocolate flavored. Pang sample lang. I prepared bento cakes with different flavors too, para matikman niyo din po at makapili tayo ng flavor para sa final cake." I said as I placed slices on their small plates.
They thanked me, pero hindi umimik si Zayden nang lagyan ko ang plato niya.
"This tastes great." Katelyn said. I smiled at her and she smiled back, gracefully lifting her fork before taking another bite.
We proceeded on tasting the bento cakes after.
"Celestine, these flavors are great!" Tita Alice said after she was done tasting all of the cakes. Everyone loved it. They said I did a magnificent job. I couldn't be more proud of myself. I was giddy while watching them eat the cakes I baked. Humirit pa ng take out si Tita Alice.
I found out that they had dinner here to tell us na ready na pala ang bahay na lilipatan namin ni Zackary. I sighed in defeat as I accepted my fate. Mukhang kailangan ko nang mag-ayos ng mga gamit.
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"Need help?" sumandal si Zayden sa hamba ng pintuan sa kwarto ko at humalukipkip. Napasimangot naman ako at umiling.
"I'm fine without you." sagot ko at padabog na nagtupi ng mga damit ko at nilagay sa maleta dahil lalayas na ako.
"Fine without me, huh? Yeah, I can see that." he said and smiled a bit.
"Talaga. Anong akala mo, sa'yo lang umiikot mundo ko?" pabalang kong sagot, mainit kasi ulo ko sa mga nangyayari kaya hindi ko siya maiwasang tarayan. Sa tingin ko ay lagi naman, sanay na din siguro siya.
"Sabi mo." he said casually and shrugged.
"I never said that." tipid kong sagot at padabog na tumayo para kunin ang maleta ko.
"Oh, now you're denying it? What else do you want to deny next, huh, Celestine?" tanong niya at hilaw na ngumiti.
Nangunot ang noo ko at inis siyang binalingan. "Kung pwede lang i-deny na may kakilala akong gago na katulad mo, 'yun ang sunod kong ide-deny." I spatted and glanced at my clothes again. "And I'm definitely better without you, what makes you think I'm not? Mas umayos nga ang buhay ko 'nung nawala ka-" I stopped midway when I heard footsteps, pagtingin ko sa pintuan ay wala na siya doon. That's when I realized the words I just said. Mahina kong pinalo ang noo ko at napapikit sa inis.
Ano 'yun, Celestine? Anong connect no'n sa mga damit?!
Inis kong tinapos ang pag-iimpake ng mga damit at lumabas ng kwarto ko dala ang dalawang maleta kung nasaan ang mga damit ko. Okay na muna siguro 'to, tsaka ko nalang balikan 'yung iba. Biglaan lang din kasi na sinabi ni mommy na lilipat na ako sa magiging bahay namin ni Zack kapag kinasal na kami. Medyo nabigla pa ako 'nung una pero mabilis ko naman nang na-process sa utak ko. And besides, it's fine dahil mas malapit ang address ng subdivision sa main branch ng bakery ko.
Sabi naman ni mommy ay fully furnished na daw ang bahay kaya hindi na ako nag-abalang magdala ng masyadong gamit. Tignan ko nalang muna kung ano ang kulang doon bago bumalik dito. Karamihan din naman ng ibang mga gamit ko ay nasa condo na tinutuluyan ko ngayon.
"Ready to go?" tanong ni Zayden na prenteng nakaupo sa sofa sa living room. He was asked to help me move out kaya ito siya, parang napipilitan pa. Kusa naman na nag-aalok pero kita ko sa mukha niyang labag sa loob niya 'yun.
Zayden offered to give me a ride to the new house at pumayag na ako dahil bukod sa pagod na ako, hindi ko pa din alam kung saan ang subdivision na lilipatan.
We were both silent while we were in his car. Pati pagdating sa mismong bahay ay wala kaming imikan.
It was a three story house. The exterior and interior was made up of white, black, and wood which made the place look simple and minimal.
Me and Zack have separate rooms which I'm really grateful for. Bukod sa dalawang kwarto namin sa second floor ay may tatlo pang guestroom, may maid's quarter din sa baba. Sabi ni mommy ay bukas daw ang dating ng mga magiging kasambahay namin dito.
"Thank you sa paghatid, kaya ko na 'to. Ingat ka pauwi." nakangiting sabi ko kay Zayden. Hindi siya umimik at tumango lang.
"My mom asked me to help you unpack." aniya at nagsimula nang maglakad papunta sa mga maleta ko.
"Hindi, kaya ko na. Mga damit ko palang naman 'tong mga 'to." kaagad na sabi ko. Kaya ko naman kasi talaga, baka maabala ko pa siya.
"She insists." tipid niya lang na sagot at tuluyan nang umakyat habang buhat ang dalawang maleta ko at hindi na ako muling nagsalita.
Napanguso ako at hinayaan nalang siya sa trip niya sa buhay. I sighed and looked around, adoring the place. I guess this will be my new home now. Though this isn't really my first time moving out of my parents house since I already live in a condo. Uuwi pa'rin ako doon madalas, lalo na dahil nando'n si Levi at hindi yun sanay na hindi ako kasama. Karamihan din ng mga gamit ko ay nando'n kaya paniguradong mas madalas ako doon kaysa sa bahay na 'to.
Naabutan ko si Zayden sa kwarto ko na inaayos na ang mga damit ko sa built in cabinet. I saw how he organized my clothes by style and color kaya hindi ko maiwasang mapangiti.
"You're seriously moving in with my brother?" tanong niya nang makita ako.
I looked around and raised my brows. "Hindi pa ba obvious?"
"What about your lover?" tanong niya habang nasa damit ang atensyon. Nangunot ang noo ko at pinagkrus ang mga braso habang nagtataka siyang tinignan.
"I don't have a lover." umirap ako.
"So that's what she's denying next." bulong niya na hindi ko gaanong naintindihan pero hindi ko nalang din pinansin.
I decided to rest for a short while habang inaayos niya ang mga damit ko. Walang hiya, oo, pero pagod na din kasi talaga ako kaya umupo nalang ako at tahimik siyang pinanood.
After a while, I glanced at my watch to check the time, 10PM na pala at nandito pa'rin si Zayden. Tapos na siya sa mga damit ko pero nakaupo pa'rin sa gilid ng kama ko, abala sa cellphone.
Bumaba ako saglit at pumunta sa kusina para tingnan kung may stocks pa doon dahil gusto kong gumawa ng midnight snack. Hindi ko pa din kasi naaayos ang mga dinala ko na para dito, bukas nalang siguro.
May mga ingredients at stocks sa fridge na pwedeng iluto pero hindi ako marunong kaya naisip kong mag pa-deliver nalang siguro.
Hindi kasi talaga ako marunong magluto but I'm good at baking. Ironic but I just really can't get myself to learn how to cook. Lahat ng niluluto ko ay palpak kaya matagal ko nang sinukuan.
I saw some baking ingredients kaya hindi natuloy ang pagpapa-deliver ko.
Instead, I baked some cinnamon rolls and made a chocolate milkshake for me and Zayden. Just a little thank you gift dahil sa pagtulong niya sa'kin.
Sumunod si Zayden sa'kin sa kusina mayamaya. He just sat on a stool and watched me bake. We bothe waited in silence, something I'm not really used to. Halos marinig ko na ang aircon sa sobrang tahimik.
The oven's timer rang kaya kaagad akong tumayo at hinanda na din ang cinnamon rolls kasabay ng milkshake na ginawa ko.
His brows arched as he looked at me. Siguro ay nagtataka kung bakit ako nag se-serve ng pastry para sa kanya.
"Just a simple thank you gift for helping me today." I told him and smiled a bit as I placed the tray in front of him.
He stared at me for a while but looked away when I stared back. He nodded and smiled. "No worries. And thank you for this." he smiled and started eating the pastry I baked.
I smiled and ate with him. What a familiar sight.
"I'm sorry about what happened earlier." he brought up. I just shrugged and smiled.
"It's okay, I'm used to us fighting all the time." I said and we both ended up laughing at my remark.
"And, uh, is it okay if I sleep here? Gabi na kasi, you know I don't drive when I'm alone at night." biglang pakiusap niya na kaagad ko namang sinang-ayunan.
"Takot ka pa'rin sa mga multo?" I asked nonchalantly and sipped from my shake.
"No, takot ako sa aksidente." he quickly said and rolled his eyes.
Natawa nalang ako at tumango. "If you say so. But sure, marami namang guest rooms, pwede din sa kwarto ng kapatid mo. I know you're tired too, magpahinga ka na pagkatapos. Ako na ang bahala sa mga huhugasan dahil nakapagpahinga naman na ako. And FYI, I know how to do the dishes." I told him. Natawa naman siya at marahang napailing.
"You sound like a wife telling her husband what to do after he gets home from work." he joked.
"Well I mean, I used to be. Siguro nasanay na ako." I answered with a downward smile.
His lips parted a bit but he immediately closed it and ignored what I just said.
We fell silent after that. We were both eating quietly when my phone suddenly beeped. Nakapatong lang yun sa lamesa kaya madali kong nakita ang message ni mommy.
From: Mom
I forgot to mention, you have to practice your wedding dance, anak! Try contacting your fiancé kung kailan siya free.
Nasapo ko ang noo sa bagong stress na binigay sa'kin ng nanay ko. "Does Zack have any free time within this week?" I asked Zayden.
Mula sa milkshake na iniinom ay tinuon niya sa'kin ang atensyon niya.
"None. He texted me the other day, nagrereklamo kasi next week pa daw siya may maluwag na schedule para mag pahinga."
Napanguso naman ako.
"Why?" he asked.
Hinarap ko sa kanya ang phone para ipakita ang message ni mommy.
Agad akong nagtaka nang tumayo siya at lumipat sa tabi ko, nakalahad ang palad.
"What's that for?" I asked, an invisible question mark forming on top of my head.
"Let's practice your wedding dance." He smiled gently.
"You know how?"
"Probably? We'll figure it out along the way." he said and held my hand. "May I have this dance, princess?"
"You don't dance, Zayden." natawa na ako. "You hate dancing."
"Well, I'm not much for dancing, but for you, I will." He said gently, slowly pulling me to stand up.
My eyes softened at the thought that he was willing to dance for me.
When I stood up, he gently placed his right hand on my waist, and using his left hand, he took my right hand and held it up slowly lacing his fingers into mine.
"Place your other hand on my shoulder," he instructed. I moved forward to reach him, and when I looked back up, I realized that our faces were just inches apart.
My eyes met his gentle ones, staring at me softly, as if this version of him doesn't hate me.
"Just follow my lead. I want you to dance gracefully with your groom at your wedding... like a princess." he laughed lightly. I smiled and looked down, refusing to show him my teary eyes.
But I don't want to dance if I'm not dancing with you.
The words almost escaped my mouth but I stopped. It's wrong. I know it is. I'm marrying his brother, I shouldn't... feel this way for him. I can't.
But oh, how I wish it was you...
Why can't it just be you?