Long-distance.
The goddess of love, Aphrodite, must not have blessed this relationship— your relationship— because just when you thought Jude would be closer to home, in England, he had to go and move to Madrid, Spain. Just when he was in the clasps of your hands, cuddling in each other's arms and kissing the day's troubles away, Real Madrid put in a bid for him and successfully got him in the first team.
It has been years— years— since you have experienced a season together, living on the same soil, within walking, driving, biking distance. Approximately, three years at Dortmund and even more years (hopefully) spreading his talents all over Spain.
Tears gather in your eyes at the thought of how far he has become, promising you (his then neighbour in Birmingham) that he'll fly you all over the world once he becomes a successful and rich football player. He has kept that promise, multiple times, flying you out to places you could only dream of visiting but every person who experienced long-distance can tell you how much of a strain it can put on the relationship.
It is not as easy as just Skyping, FaceTime, and calls because you have to match up time-zones and consider schedules. His, as a footballer, and yours, as a university student.
"Y/N? Y/N? You okay there, love?"
Jude's voice pulls you from your thoughts and you focus again on the laptop in front of you that shows your boyfriend on the other end.
"Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Continue with what you were saying, I'm sorry for spacing out." You nod your head as you move closer to the camera, encouraging him to continue what he was saying.
"Yeah no, it's fine. I know you don't mean to do it deliberately." He frowns because he can see your eyes glazing over once again, suggesting there's something heavy weighing on your mind.
"Are you sure you okay there, Y/N? You know you can talk to me right."
"Yeah..." The sigh that left your lips says enough and Jude makes up his mind to get to the bottom of your troubles, even if it takes the whole Skype session.
He didn't even need to say anything else before you started: "I don't know how to put it into words without coming off as selfish..."
You wince at the choice of wording, "...It's just that I'm missing you and wishing you were here with me right now. I know you can't be and that's okay because you're all the way in Madrid, but I don't know how to tell myself this."
"I don't know, Jude. It's just— it's like— I'm tired. I'm tired of constantly missing you. I'm tired of not being able to reach out and kiss you and hold you and feel you. I'm tired of long-distance, period." You were too afraid to raise your head. To see his expression after admitting all these feelings you have been feeling these past few weeks.
The silence on either end was so deafening that you cupped your hands over your ears, everything was just so damn loud. You needed— no— wanted it to end. "Y/N, hey. Don't worry about anything else just follow the sound of my voice."
"Come back to me, hey. I'm not angry. I'm not disappointed. I just want to see your face, love, please, can I see it?"
Jude's voice sounded clearer to you now, as if he moved closer to the mic to guide you back to the moment. My god, he just wishes he was close-by so he can wrap you in a bear hug and help you out of the mini-panic attack you're having.
His voice no longer sounds like jumbled sounds and the tears that gathered in the corners of your eyes, which made it hard to see him, were starting to disappear. Jude's signature smile - full display of teeth - was the first image you came back to.
"There's my girl."
His voice trembled as easily as you were still trying to catch your hitched breaths, calming yourself down.
"There's my pretty girl. Look at those pretty eyes, I remember how big they got when I scraped my leg trying to get the ball of that roof one time." He hummed, as he let out a breath of nervous laughter.
Clearing his throat, he asked the question he feared the answer to: "Do you want to break up, Y/N? I won't be upset at your honest answer."
You let out a laugh as the tears escaped your eyes, "God no, Jude. You are the love of my life. I could never want to break-up with you, what would that say about me? Can't handle a long-distance relationship because of some temporary emotions I'm experiencing. I would never allow that to be the cause of our break-up."
"You mean that much to me." Your hand instinctively reaches for the necklace with his initials on it, funny, because it moved closer to your heart. Jude reaches out for his one with your initials on it and kisses it, mouthing "I love you's" into the camera.
Jude opened his mouth to say something but you heard ruffling on his side of the screen before a figure appears to be in conversation with him. He nods his head and turns back to you, "I have to go now, love. But I want to continue this conversation."
Trying to wipe your eyes, you repeatedly nod your head "Yeah, I understand. We can, we definitely can. I want to hear your opinion too."
Jude has broad shoulders but because he is resting his chin on his balled up fists, it makes him seem smaller than what he actually is. He reaches his arms out in an attempt at a hug and it leaves you in giggles to which you try to re-create.
"I'll see you soon, yeah? I love you, don't you ever forget that." He blows kisses and just like that the screen goes blank.
"Yeah, I love you too." You whispered to the air, hoping that it'll travel and find its way to Jude's ears.
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a/n: there is a part two!!