Alyarra ripped the flesh from around her nails anxiously as the council awaited for Aegon's arrival. The moon was still out, and most members were confused as to why Aemond had called an emergency meeting. And most of them were worried to see the one-eyed prince home so early from his travels. The Dowager Queen sat with a solemn expression on her face, her eyes set on her son, because she knew something was wrong.
Alyarra didn't look at anything in particular, she just stared at the table. She didn't want to be in these chambers but her husband asked her to be his pillar for moral support. He had not yet explained what transpired in Storm's End, but Alyarra couldn't help her mind from wandering.
She was now a mother, and she could not even begin to imagine what Pricness Rhaenyra would feel whenever she would learn of Lucerys' death. Alyarra was a new mother, but her thinking of Baelon being viciously snatched from her made her want to die. Lucerys had been with Rhaenyra for fourteen years, it must hurt more than anything. Fourteen... a child. Alyarra felt herself tear up. He was just a child, just four years younger than her.
She was just a child also, but she felt her childhood so far away from her. Her thoughts were sliced in half whenever the door to the council chamber was slammed shut. In strutted the new King with Criston Cole trailing behind, an annoyed expression apparent on his face. "You better have a good excuse for this, brother. A great excuse for me to be dragged out of my bed." Aegon spoke angrily, his stance faltering slightly when his eyes landed on Alyarra.
Aegon went to sit at the end of the table, his mother sitting at his side and Otto moving to stand behind him on the right side, Criston Cole on the left. Aegon looked at Aemond expectantly, as did everyone in the room.
"Son... what has happened? Did Lord Borros not bend the knee? Did he send you away?" Alicent asked frantically, and Alyarra turned to look at her husband. His one eye was set on the table, none of his usual expressions were on his face. This was different.
"Something happened in Storm's End..." Alyarra decided to swallow the bile in her throat and speak up on Aemond's behalf, and he turned to look at her solemnly. He swallowed, his eye pleading for something. She couldn't read what.
"I killed Lucerys." He spoke up, his eye still on her face. She looked at him, her face hard as she moved to grab his hand in hers. She was horrified by his actions, terrified in fact, but she was his wife. He needed her now.
Aemond didn't look away from Alyarra, he was trying to find comfort in her gaze. But he inevitably looked around at the horrified faces in the room, and his eye then fell back to the table. "Everyone out except my family." Otto ordered roughly, and Alyarra gulped as the men of the council scurried out of the chambers.
"Explain." Otto ordered, and a yielded sob left Alicent's mouth. Alyarra looked at the Dowager Queen, who couldn't even look at her son. Now in the room only stood Alyarra, Aemond, Alicent, Otto, Aegon, and Criston.
"I killed Lucerys." Aemond repeated and his tone was unusual, unsure of himself. Aegon laughed, a cynical, twisted laugh that made Alyarra snap her head at him. She glared, and she wished that her eyes could burn his head open. She was so focused on glaring at the King that she didn't notice Otto approach her husband.
"You only lost one eye! How could you be so blind?!" Otto Hightower would spit into his grandson's face as he grabbed the collar of his doublet, shaking him as if that would knock some sense into Aemond. Alyarra looked at the floor, then at Alicent. She didn't look at Aemond, the Dowager Queen was staring straight ahead. Tears brimming her eyes as she gripped the council table.
"Aemond... what did you do?" She asked slowly, her gaze fixed ahead. "Who cares?! This is great news! Amazing even. We should hold a feast!" Aegon exclaimed, and Alyarra felt like throwing up at the thought of celebrating such vile actions.
"You shut your mouth!" Otto commanded his eldest grandson, forgetting that he was the King. "What did you do?!" Otto shook Aemond once more. Aemond didn't meet his grandsire's eyes, he didn't have the courage.
"H-He came as an envoy... I tried to frighten him... I tried to avenge my eye. I got on Vhagar, but I did not intend to kill him. I only wanted the debt he owned me to be paid." Aemond answered, meek and unsure of his words. Alyarra had never seen him like this. Otto let out a strangled curse and pushed Aemond backwards.
"You didn't intend to kill him?! Then what happened?! How did Rhaenyra's child die?!" Otto spat out, and Alyarra rushed to grab Aemond's arm in support of him. She had never felt as perplexed in her life. She hated his actions, but loved him all the same.
"I don't know! I lost control of Vhagar!" Aemond responded, exasperated by the revelation. Alyarra gulped as Otto Hightower's face contorted into an unreadable one. Alicent moved her hands and started praying for repentance, and Aegon just seemed amused by this all.
"You will never repeat that again." Otto growled, making Aemond's face contort in confusion. "When asked, you will simply state that you were defending your brother." Otto instructed, which made Alyarra confused. If it was an accident, why couldn't Aemond just tell everyone that?
"The people will think I purposely murdered my kin... I am not a kinslayer." Aemond stated, his insides felt like they were being ripped apart.
Aemond knew that there was an insatiable hunger inside of him that caused him to murder Luke. He knew he lost control of his dragon. Yet he also knew something inside of him had shifted when he was chasing after Luke. But it really was an accident.
That is what he believed anyways.
"Would you rather be a fearful kinslayer, or a weak little boy that couldn't control his dragon?" Otto's voice dripped with venom, making Aemond look down at Alyarra. She was shocked at what Otto was saying, very shocked.
"You know how dangerous it would be... for you to admit that you can not control your dragon? For our opposition to learn that our biggest weapon is one that we can not tame?" Alyarra looked away from Aemond and to the Dowager Queen. She was still praying, and Aegon was still smiling like the wicked man he was.
"I can control her..." Aemond contested, but his words were clearly not true. "Not when it matters the most." Otto spat back, and Alyarra had never seen Aemond look so small.
"Everybody lay off my brother! He has won our first battle, we should all be thankful. Ser Criston... get the servants to prepare the Great Hall for morrow, it will be a great celebration." Aegon ordered as the knight nodded once.
"A battle?! This was not a battle to be won, Aegon. Lucerys went as an envoy, not a warrior, and your brother murdered him." Alicent finally spoke up, seemingly disgusted with what had transpired.
"Mother, were you not the one saying that my cunt sister was going to murder me and my brothers because we were challenges to her false claim? If that was true then it is fine that we killed Lucerys." Aegon contested, narrowing his eyes on his mother.
"Murder is not fine! Lucerys was a child!" Alicent slammed her hand on the table, clearly disgruntled by Aegon's nonchalantless over the murder of his own nephew.
"Lucerys was a bastard, and he took my brother's eye. He deserved what he got." Alyarra could not believe what Aegon was spewing, she looked up at Aemond but he didn't meet her eye.
"Do you not understand the graveness of this?! A war of envoys was ended by your brother! He has started the war of fire and blood! Do you not get it?! The blacks will come for us, seeking their revenge. Are you not conscious of what Lucerys' death means?!" Alicent was speaking like a frantic woman, trying to get her son to open his eyes.
It dawned on Alyarra as Alicent spewed her words. War. A war had been started by her own husband. The blacks would come and seek their revenge, and Alyarra was worried. For herself and for her son. Aemond had taken Rhaenyra's son, what stopped her from coming for Aemond's?
"Mother, the matter is done. Aemond has proved his loyalty to his King, as he should. We will all celebrate him on the morrow." Aegon spoke harshly and stood from the table. "I am going back to bed, I suggest you all do the same." Aegon spoke plainly and sashayed out of the council chamber followed by Criston. Alicent was dumbfounded but ultimately stood from her seat and exited the chambers hastily, followed by her father.
Alyarra grabbed Aemond's arm and led him out of the chambers, and to their own. It broke her heart to see Aemond so battered and broken, but when her mind drifted to poor Lucerys, the sympathy she felt for her husband diminished.
She could not help to think about that poor boy. She didn't know him well, but he was so young. The fear he must have felt having Vhagar chase him... the uncertainty. She imagined the events in her head and felt sick to her stomach. How could Aemond do this? Did he not understand the danger this put his own son in?
"You are crying? For Lucerys?" Aemond asked his wife as he shut the door to their chambers swiftly behind him. Alyarra didn't even realize the tears that fell from her eyes. Her eyes were already used to shedding them so often she was numb. She wiped her cheeks and turned from Aemond, not wanting him to see her cry.
"I am just worried." She whispered, barely audible for Aemond. He shifted on his feet, the guilt was tearing into him at the most rapid pace. All he felt was guilt. "About?" Aemond muttered as he looked at the back of her head. She felt like she was being choked as she thought of all the possibilities the war could inflict on her family.
"Aemond... you started a war. You killed Rhaenyra's son! Do you not fear that they will come for yours?! Our son, our Baelon?! Are you not scared or what will happen after what you did?" She felt regret as soon as the words left her mouth. She knew he already felt guilty.
Aemond was quiet at his wife's words. He stared at her, his eye fixed on her face. It was almost as if he were trying to read her mind. His eye turned distant for a moment, and he sighed heavily.
For a moment, Alyarra wondered what went on in his head. Perhaps all the trauma, all the pain he'd felt. Perhaps all the mistakes and terrible things he'd done. Or perhaps none of them, and he was simply thinking of Baelon. "I promise you," he said slowly, "that will not happen."
"How can you be sure?" She whispered, her gaze lowering to the floor in front of her. Aemond approached her, taking her arms and pulling her into a tight hug. For a moment, Alyarra forgot all of the doings of her husband as she basked in his embrace.
For a moment, she was transported back to the months of her pregnancy. Back when Aemond was devoted and caring. Back when he made love to her instead of using her with reckless abandon. Back to just a week ago. What shifted in him? She wasn't sure.
But she was brought back down to earth. "I swear on my life... I will protect you and Baelon. No harm will ever come to my son." Aemond planted a kiss on the top of her head. She wasn't sure she believed him.
"I am scared..." She whispered as she nuzzled her head into his chest. Aemond sighed and wrapped his arms even tighter around her. "I didn't mean for this to happen." Aemond thought that repeating the words made them more true.
"But it did." She replied solemnly. "And nothing will ever be the same again." Aemond looked down at his wife, and his heart felt like it was ripped from his chest whenever his eye landed on her broken expression. One hot tear left the corner of her eye, and she rushed to wipe it. He glanced at her and then took a deep breath.
Aemond moved to their bed, his face stoic as he shed his clothing. Alyarra changed back into her nightgown then moved to her side of their bed, and layed down. Her back faced away from him. And then she flinched whenever he moved his own hand to her waist. Aemond sat up, his face worried. Two times she had flinched this night. Two times she had cowered from him when he reached for affection.
"You think me a monster, don't you?" That was the second time Aemond had asked her this.
The first time, was months ago when he had murdered rapists who had come to harm her. This time, he had murdered his own nephew. That meant that this time, the answer was different. But she vowed to never admit it. She loved him.
"No." She didn't have anything to tell him. A plain no would suffice.
"You have flinched away from me when I try to touch you two times. Why? Are you disgusted by me?" He questioned her. He was hurt, of all people he never expected Alyarra to be the one to cower from him.
"I did not." She told him and tossed around, facing Aemond. She gave him a small forced smile and laced her fingers with his. "I love you." She told him.
"But you're afraid of me." He stated bitterly, snatching his hands from hers. He had to be jesting, he had just killed his nephew and he expected Alyarra to just be fine? Was he delusional?
"I am not." Lies. She was afraid that any moment now he was going to flip her over and ruthlessly destroy her body like he had been doing for the last couple of days. She wanted to help him, she wanted to perform her duty as a wife, but she wasn't sure she could take any more.
Aemond eyed her face, then his gaze fell to her exposed collarbone. He skimmed over her chest and then darted to her arms, then her neck. Her skin was bruised like violets. He brought his hand to the bruise on her collarbone, making her wince in pain. He did this.
"I hurt you?" He asked, but he knew the answer already. She nodded her head and looked away, she didn't want to see the look on his face. One sole tear left Aemond's eye, and then he simply laid back down.
"I didn't mean for this." He stated plainly. Alyarra gulped and laid down besides him, her small arms coming to drape over his frame.
Love. She would hold him because she loved him. She would stand by his side because she married him. Love. It was the word that she couldn't forget. That she wouldn't. She wasn't going to throw away everything they built.
-
"This is foul." Catherryn told her lady as the pair stood in a corner of the Great Hall whilst a celebration for the death of Lucerys Velaryon was in full swing. Alyarra hummed and nodded her head slightly. She agreed, but she dared not speak it aloud.
"I mean... he was a child. Innocent. I-I can't believe your husband did that." Catherryn continued, and her words only made Alyarra's heart strain even more with sorrow for Lucerys. "You know... the whispers aren't kind. All sorts of retellings of Lucerys' death are being spread." Catherryn continued.
"Don't even say anything. I am not sure my heart or my mind can take it." Alyarra told her best friend in full honesty. The tales of her husband's cruelty only depressed her further. "I'm sorry." Catherryn mumbled.
Alyarra looked over the Great Hall, her eyes finding her husband who was standing next to Aegon. For someone who claimed he was not a kinslayer, he sure reveled in the praise the court Lords were giving him for his atrocious actions.
Her gaze then followed the Dowager Queen Alicent, who was solemnly speaking with Helaena. Apart from Alyarra and Catherryn, they were the only two people who seemed actually disgusted by Aemond's actions. Alyarra sighed and shook her head.
How were these people celebrating the death of an innocent kid?
"Cregan has yet to respond, has he?" Catherryn asked suddenly. Alyarra shook her head no and pressed her lips together. "He was not going to bend the knee to Aegon in the first place, and now with what Aemond has done... he's never going to support him. You know my brother well, he likes to protect the innocent, not kill them in cold blood."
"Yeah... but what of us? We're northerners, don't you worry they'll claim us as traitors?" Catherryn asked, and her worries also clawed at Alyarra. "We will be fine. I promise you." She wasn't sure that was a promise she could keep anymore, but she would try.
"What I worry the most for is my son. What if... what if they come for him?" Alyarra asked in a hushed manner. Catherryn took a deep breath and gave her look. "Do you really think they would come and harm a babe?" She questioned.
"Aemond went and harmed a child..." Alyarra said bitterly. "What's the difference?" She asked as Catherryn gulped and rubbed the back of her neck.
"I've been thinking about it. I could barely sleep at all last night... maybe... maybe I should write to Cregan in secret." Alyarra spoke in the lowest of tones to her lady in waiting.
"What for?" Catherryn questioned, intrigued as she leaned more towards Alyarra. "For him to provide asylum for us. For Baelon, yourself, and I... until war is over. Not in the North, maybe in some of our other keeps..." Alyarra explained.
"But would Aemond allow for that? Or the King? If Cregan declares for Rhaenyra then..." Catherryn asked all of the right questions.
"Aemond will need convincing, but I know he will want Baelon to be safe. This is the best alternative for my son, to be whisked away from the war. Soon enough King's Landing will be a battlefield, and I don't want Baelon in the middle." Alyarra spoke, and she was more than sure of her words.
"I will even offer to take Helaena and my nephews. It's not about sides, it's about protecting my family." Catherryn nodded her head and took Alyarra's hand in hers.
"I will ride for you until the end of times, my lady."
-
Author's note:
Shes so cute thinking she can just leave the capital. Im excited for next chapter, its going to be focused on aemond and his struggles!!!
Thank you all for the support my story receives, I feel so lucky!!! You guys are the best.
Dont forget to tell me your ideas and what you would like to see!
Thank you so much x
ah also my tiktok has spoilers @purplewriter_xx :)))))