[vlogs!]
—————
[vlogs!]
LILY WATCHES AS EVERYONE LAUGHS, undoubtedly keeping her from turning on and beginning to record her vlog.
"guys!" she yells, once she starts recording as she turns the camera to them.
they all turn to her, suddenly forgetting what they were just talking and joking about.
she giggles, quickly realizing that she's actually gotten their attention for the first time in the past half-hour.
"i'm trying to record my vlog!" she explains, motioning to her camera that is still, in fact, recording their faces and reactions.
"now, do you wanna keep blabbing and getting loud over there, or be guests on my vlog?"
elliot and madi share a look, not hesitating one bit to race over to her with excited smiles on their faces.
"duh!" elliot states with a big smile, while madi smiles and nods along with her.
as they sit beside her on the ground in the living room, they turn to look back at the rest of the guys, along with alahna.
the shorter girl rolls her eyes at them.
"idiots." she mutters as she walks over to them and sits on the far end of the couch.
"so? guys?" lily asks again, waiting for their answer.
it's quiet for a moment, before chris rolls his eyes at both matt and nick. "obviously we want to be in it."
and with that he walks over to them and sits beside madi and lily.
lily tries to ignore how his bare knee brushes against her own.
she flushes for a moment, before forcing herself to pretend like it didn't happen.
matt and lily look at each other at the same time; she pretends to be oblivious, while he gives a raised eyebrow in confusion.
she looks away from him, rolling her eyes at her own strange body for reacting to chris so weirdly—they've only been getting along with each other for a few weeks.
as nick and matt finally walk over to sit on the two open spots on the couch, lily turns her camera around, smiling. "alright, guys!" she says with an excited grin.
"in the first half of this vlog, i'm going to be a little more honest about a few things," she states, about to explain what she means by that, but stops short when chris rolls his eyes and groans playfully, off camera.
lily's eyebrows knit together in both frustration and confusion, trying to figure out whether he's kidding or being serious—she never knows with him.
after a few moments of silence, everyone, excluding lily, bursts into loud and breathless laughter.
lily frowns annoyedly, rolling her eyes.
when they're laughter doesn't die down, she rolls her eyes. "okay, i get it! now could you be quiet, so i can actually explain with more details?"
they nod in understanding, whereas chris stands up to grab a snack from the kitchen.
the rest of the group follows, talking quietly among themselves.
lily rolls her eyes at their antics, before continuing, "okay. so, what's going to happen is, for the first half of the video, i'm going to talk about a few things that i didn't get to go into detail a whole lot, so that that's out of the way!"
"i just want to be honest about this stuff, instead of keeping it bottled up inside and be real with you guys." she continues.
"but then! i'm going to be doing a fun little activity and experiment with some of my dear friends in the second half!" she exclaims with rare excitement.
elliot hears her best friend's giggle and turns around. she smiles softly, feeling so happy that her best friend is happy.
"she's doing good, huh?" chris asks quietly from behind her.
elliot is shocked, to say the least, at the fact that it's him asking.
she smiles again, the both of them turning around to see lily explaining her ideas more detailed with a big, bright smile on her face.
"yeah. she really is," she says, before turning back to him as she opens the lid of her gatorade. "i know she has a long way to go and her mental health will make it harder for her to keep going. but, i think since meeting you guys, she's been shown a new perspective that she's not alone and that she can get through anything."
"has it really been like that before?" chris asks, shock clear in his tone.
to be completely honest, chris never thought of her as someone that was punishing herself or struggling so badly in silence. especially after getting to know her these past few weeks, while she and elliot were staying at his and his brothers' house.
the only thing he let himself see about her is that she's incredibly strong with the way she kept going with everything she was going through—how resilient she truly is.
elliot sighs, bringing her blue bottle of electrolytes to her mouth and drinking it a bit, before closing it with the cap and placing it on the side of the counter by them.
"she doesn't talk about it a lot—or really, at all—but her parents' abuse really hurt her. before she met alex, she learned from them that the world is cruel—that they were cruel." she mutters, feeling very protective over lily, once again.
"what do you mean?" he asks, tilting his head to the side in slight confusion.
"well, you know how parents are supposed to be the ones to be there for you, take care of you, and protect you?" she asks and he nods.
"with them? they didn't care about those things. at least when allison was still in high school, lily wasn't alone in their exhausting amount of cruel criticism and high pressure. not to mention the constant manipulation and gaslighting and guilt-tripping that they did to the both of them,"
"but...then, allison graduated and even though she protected lily when she was there, she couldn't protect her after because she had to get out and get her life together."
"so, she just left lily by herself—to fend for herself?" chris asks, feeling a sudden irritation at learning this information.
elliot laughs quietly in amusement at his reaction. "for someone who keeps insisting that he doesn't care about her, you seem to keep proving it to be the exact opposite."
chris glares at her, causing her to answer him. "i know what you're thinking. but, it's not like that. lily convinced and made allison leave to build a life for herself—she wanted her to get out and go into the world and to be happy,"
"she knew that allison could never be happy if she stayed—even if it was to protect her little sister. but, the thing about lily, is even as a kid, she felt so much compassion and empathy for people that she was considerate and always willing to protect other people and sacrifice her well-being and happiness for them. even for her own sister."
as elliot explains more—though she should feel guilty for admitting this stuff to him, she knows that he won't ever judge lily for it, not anymore—chris' eyes catch lily, who's stood by the glass window that overlooks the building, talking animatedly.
"and their parents' abuse was so bad that she had lost hope for herself—she thought she'd be in that never-ending trauma and thought she wouldn't even get to escape them after our senior graduation. but, as soon as allison got settled in and starting acting and getting paid, she came back for her." she says, pride in her eyes, clearly seeing allison as both a big sister and role model.
"you should've seen her when she went to get her. it was amazing," she says, smiling at the memory. "i was there to help lily with some homework, but we stopped after we heard yelling in the living room. and then, suddenly jake—this was the first time we met him, by the way—told us to get what lily needed and that allison and him were getting her out of there."
chris shouldn't be shocked, but he is.
"it really was amazing. i ended up going with—so that they could drop me off at home. but, allison was amazing when we left—she made sure her parents knew that her and lily wouldn't be in their lives anymore. she really did save lily's life, even when she didn't have any hope for herself."
when she finishes talking, chris is in shock, still. "wow. that must've been hard for her. and not only that, but then she had to go through all of that stuff with alex?" he questions more to himself then to elliot.
finding this out is really showing him how strong lily really is.
"guys! come on!" lily calls out to everyone, motioning to them to come back to sit down.
her face falls for a split moment. "or do you guys not want to be here for this first part of the video? i understand if you don't. i mean, it's going to be pretty emotional." she says, her voice shifting to something more small and sad.
"it's okay if you don't want to!" she says in a reassuring voice, trying to pretend that she doesn't care if they support her or not.
matt rolls his eyes at her. "are you serious? of course we want to be around for this part."
lily smiles in appreciation, trying to hide the shock on her face. "oh, good! okay."
everyone moves to sit down with her on floor as she turns the camera towards herself.
"okay, i'm going to try to be brief with this because i don't really wanna dwell on it." she begins, the encouraging looks from her friends helping her feel more comfortable.
"so, first. i should start with the living situation. so, i'm sure some of you noticed, but elle and i stayed at the boys' house for a few weeks," she starts, trying to ignore the way her breath hitches in her throat at the thought of the situation between her and alex.
"the reason for that, is because someone i wanted out of my life and who i wanted to move on from, well, he was insistent on harassing me and my friends. it got so bad that he was stalking me at home and we got into an argument and it got physical." she says shakily, giving elliot an appreciative look when she holds her hand softly.
"everything's good now—i wanna clarify that. it didn't get too physical and he took the hint after a while. but, that's why i injured my fist and why we stayed at the triplets' house." she explains, her face falling at elliot's next statement, "i wish you'd just tell them who it is."
lily's eyes widen in shock. "elle!"
"what?" elliot replies, shrugging. "it's true and we all know it. he deserves to be exposed as the piece of shit he is."
lily rolls her eyes.
"i agree." chris says, ignoring the glare she sends his way, as the rest of the group, excluding lily herself, nods in agreement.
"whatever," lily sighs. "look, a lot of people are big supporters of him and even if he does deserve it, i'm not going to reveal him because it's not going to erase anything or make the situation better." she says, before she decides to change the subject.
"now, the other thing, i don't want to ruin the mood in this video, so i'll be posting on instagram about it some other time," she says, quickly ignoring the confused looks everyone gives her.
"but, the other part of the video is that everyone here is going to help me decorate this house. which...is the surprise," she says, moving over to fit her and elliot into the camera's angle and frame.
"because...we moved into a house and we just got done moving everything into the house." she explains excitedly as she gets up to show them some of the boxes sitting by the front door.
then, she turns to her friends. "so, shall we, guys?"
—————
A/N: okay, i'm sorry i left this on a cliffhanger, but i didn't realize it would get so long. so, i will write the rest out in the next chapter, after work tomorrow. okay, that's it!!
—hannah <3