A/N: Very quickly, I just wanted to thank you all for 1k views. I do realise views do not mean actual reads but I still feel happy about it. Thank you so much and I wish you a good time reading!
T/W: inappropriate relationship (as the title suggests)
Brett really didn't know how it came to the situation where Eddy Chen was undoing his belt.
Brett had been a teacher for two years, so, as many of his colleagues claimed, he was still a "freshman". And it's true, he didn't have as much experience as the others, and ha, he had far too much enthusiasm for someone in this profession. He wondered when he would become like them, tired of work and children, raising his voice even in situations that did not require it, authoritarian. But for now, he was far from that stage.
He taught music education, which was often just a subject to rattle off for many, something that was forced upon them and not something you needed to focus on in public school. He taught all grades, so his students were either complete toddlers or adults not much younger than him, which he sometimes forgot when he spoke to them as if they were still kids, only to realise his mistake a moment later. Even so, Brett still had enthusiasm inside. He wanted the classes to be fun, a time to relax, not stress. Younger children were still rather eager to learn and play music, the problem was with high school students. He was well aware that they probably had other worries, tests, quizzes, he didn't want to tire them out, but it wasn't in his nature to just let them slack off completely, so he tried to entertain them too. With different topics, in different ways, but still. He encouraged them to bring their instruments or start learning one, though, of course, he didn't force them to do so. Even though the principal might have not liked it, Brett treated the high schoolers gently, and the most important thing for him was simply their presence, because, well, he had to give grades on some basis. And he usually had no problems with that at all, but... well...
Eddy Chen from the last grade of high school did not attend his classes. Brett remembered him, but he'd only seen him twice in the course of the whole term. He was constantly battling over what to do with it, whether to let it go, to just let him pass the subject without problems. Finally, he decided to talk to him. He would listen to Eddy's reasons, even flimsy excuses, and then decide what to do with him.
Only he hadn't expected that.
Brett had heard of various forms of bribery, of course, he knew it was going on, but, in his short career, it had never happened to him and, frankly, he hadn't thought it would ever change. Maybe that's why he didn't react immediately.
When Eddy entered the empty music room and closed the door behind him, he seemed resigned. Brett, however, had seen such expressions on students' faces before. They showed up when they thought they were going to get reprimanded. And no wonder, your teacher suddenly wants to talk to you alone... What else would you think? Brett sighed.
"Sit down," he suggested. Eddy took a few steps closer to the desk but didn't sit down, so Brett decided to stand up too, to be more or less at the same level.
"As you might suspect, it's about your final grade..." Brett began, and Eddy shifted from foot to foot and finally looked at him.
"Sir," he interrupted.
"Yes?"
"I..." Eddy hesitated for a moment, and Brett thought he seemed troubled. If he had any problems, the teacher obviously wasn't going to bore the boy with a whole lecture on attendance. "...I'll do anything to get a good grade."
Brett blinked a couple of times. He hadn't quite expected it. He smiled quickly though.
"That's good. But first I wanted to ask why-"
Eddy took a few more steps toward him, definitely already invading his personal space, and put his hands on his shoulders. He towered over him, being a little taller than him, and Brett was suddenly aware again that it was a grown man standing in front of him.
"Do you understand, Mr Yang? Everything," he repeated with emphasis.
Brett, frankly, did not understand. Was his student really trying to threaten him right now to get a stupid grade from music class? It seemed so ridiculous to him that he thought it must have been some kind of joke.
"Eddy, listen, you'll get a grade, I just..."
Eddy knelt down and started to undo his belt, and Brett was stunned.
"Mr Yang..." Eddy said again to the dumbfounded Brett. "I know some things about instruments and I'll prove it to you in a moment... Maybe on this basis, it will be possible to do something about this grade, how does that sound?"
Eddy batted his eyelashes as if he'd only read about it in books and wanted to try it himself, and Brett finally snapped out of it and forced the boy away from him, stepping back even closer to the wall.
"God, Eddy, no... What the hell do you think you're doing?! I would never..."
Eddy looked confused only for a moment. He got up quickly.
"So do you prefer something else? Should I undress? Or lie down on the desk? I will do anything..."
"Enough," Brett interrupted him in a sharp tone because he was starting to get angry. Where do today's young people come up with such stupid ideas?! Too much internet, or who knows what is corrupting innocent children's brains! He also felt sorry for Eddy that he thought he had to do something like this. Did Brett really seem like some terrible teacher who would make Eddy fail an entire semester? He felt like he had failed to help his student.
"Eddy, what were you thinking? Where did this behavior come from?" he asked again, trying to keep his voice calm.
The boy clenched his fists, his face burning with embarrassment, shame, anger? Brett wasn't sure.
"It's the only thing... I don't have money to pay you!"
Brett just got even more worried.
"But Eddy, what are you talking about? I never-"
"Maybe you can give me a chance?" Eddy called desperately. "I can really do you good, I practiced..."
"Practiced?! On who?!" Brett exclaimed fiercely, as the terrifying thought occurred to him that Eddy had done it before, proposed it to someone else, and that someone had agreed and used the poor boy, and damn it, he was getting so mad...
Eddy mumbled something Brett didn't understand.
"Repeat it!" he called impatiently. The name. He must know the teacher's name. As soon as he would get hold of that bastard who was taking advantage of innocent students... He was boiling with indignation.
Eddy turned even redder.
"On a banana," he said louder in an offended tone, though this time Brett knew it was an embarrassment. He was so relieved that he laughed briefly, but then turned serious because this situation still wasn't right.
"Eddy, look at me," he pleaded, but Eddy didn't listen, so he gave up and continued, "Eddy, listen. I would never, ever ask you for something like that. I would never ask for something like that in my life. And others... And no one should ask you to do that, especially not any teacher! If there are any, report it to the principal, me, or your parents right away, understood? Because that's absolutely not okay. Is that clear?"
Eddy didn't answer.
"Hello? Do we understand each other?"
"Yes," Eddy finally murmured, and Brett sighed, though it still worried him.
"I just don't understand... Why are you so desperate? It's just a grade. It's not important in life at all, Eddy, grades don't define our worth. I've never been that great at school either, so what?" Brett spoke, but he wasn't sure if it had any effect, so he tried again, "Eddy, tell me... Why do you care so much? Or did someone make you do it?"
Then his student burst into tears.
Brett pursed his lips. His first impulse was to try to comfort and embrace the boy, but in light of what had just happened, he didn't feel it was the right thing to do. Instead, he patted his head slowly and motioned him to the chair across from the desk. This time Eddy obeyed and sat down. Brett turned to search his bag. He found a packet of tissues and handed them to his student, who took one out, wiped his eyes, and blew his nose. Brett leaned against the desk and shoved his hands into his pockets, waiting patiently.
"I need that grade, Mr Yang... Please..." Eddy finally said quietly.
Brett was really concerned about his obsession with this topic.
"You'll get a good grade, I promise," he tried to reassure him, having completely abandoned his original plan to talk it out first. The boy looked at him with glazed eyes, this time with some hope in his eyes. Brett hesitated, wondering what to say next. "Eddy... Can you tell me why you've been avoiding my lessons? Do you... have any issues you've had to deal with? Or did I do something wrong?"
Eddy was silent again for a moment before finally speaking.
"I... play the violin..." he mumbled.
"Really?!" Brett exclaimed a little too enthusiastically, so he controlled himself quickly. "That's great, Eddy. You could have brought it to the class, you know I let students bring-"
"But..." he interrupted. "But I can't play. I'm hopeless. I will never get to study at the conservatory in my life, my parents are right, but... I don't want to... If I can't, then... I couldn't have classes with you because it's too much..."
Although Eddy couldn't quite express himself, Brett saw himself in this boy. Insecure, lost, not knowing what to do with his future, still immature, and unable to understand his own feelings.
"Sorry," Eddy finished his speech and hung his head. "But my parents will kill me if I don't pass something, so I'm begging you..."
"It's okay, Eddy. You'll get an A in this class," Brett assured him. But still... It was too much. Too much of a sacrifice to... Ah, he just had to ask. "Eddy, listen..."
Brett took his chair and moved it closer to Eddy, then sat on it. He turned his head towards him.
"Are your parents... doing something bad to you? Are they threatening or beating you?"
"No!" Eddy protested quickly, genuine surprise in his eyes. "No, Mr Yang, really no, that's not what I meant!"
Brett sighed. He'd be angry with himself if he didn't even try to ask, so he didn't regret it.
"Alright. Don't worry, you'll get a good grade."
Eddy smiled for the first time since coming here.
"Thank you, Mr Yang. Thank you very much."
"But, Eddy... I want to see you in class next semester."
The boy opened his mouth to say something, but Brett wouldn't let him.
"No buts! My lessons really aren't that scary, believe me." He laughed briefly. "Bring your violin too. I'll judge your suitability for the conservatory myself, and I'll help you as much as I can."
"Please don't bother..." Eddy hung his head again and Brett crossed his arms over his chest.
"Eddy, I'm a violinist too, so I promise I'll help you."
"You play the violin?!" Eddy exclaimed with the same enthusiasm that Brett had expressed earlier at a similar message. The teacher chuckled.
"Yes, and you would know that if you showed up to class."
His student blushed again.
"Sorry."
"Don't worry about anything. Case settled. Now, you can go."
Eddy stood up and nodded at him in respect, then began to walk away.
"Oh, and Eddy," Brett stopped him. "I don't know where you got the idea that you could seduce me..."
It felt strange to even say the word alone in front of a student.
"...but don't try it again. Not with me, not with any other teacher, okay?"
Eddy turned as red as a peony again, and Brett felt sorry for him. He didn't want to embarrass him, but he considered it his duty to protect his students.
"Okay, Sir," Eddy mumbled. "Thank you."
He went out, leaving Brett alone with his thoughts. He hoped he was able to help the boy at least a little... But this outburst of crying disturbed him. Should he talk to his parents? Refer him to the school psychologist? His co-workers would probably completely ignore the matter... Well, he'll just try to keep an eye on him.
Brett was satisfied with his job in the following semester. It seemed to him no one had any reason to complain about his classes. Well, none of the students anyway. However, he was particularly pleased with the presence of Eddy, who quickly became his favourite student (which of course he could not say aloud, no favouritism!). It turned out that the boy played the violin very well (to be honest, Brett's jaw dropped the first time he heard him, he wasn't someone who "couldn't play") and Brett sincerely believed that he would be able to get into his dream university. He couldn't know for certain, but it seemed to him that his student was also opening up more to him - he would come to class with a smile that made Brett think that the meager salary was worth it. And sometimes Eddy would come up to him after a lesson and ask for tips or tell him what piece he was currently working on. It was the first time Brett had such close contact with a student, and he enjoyed it because he liked to imagine that he had managed to help him in some minimal way.
And then came the end of the year.
Brett had traditionally been presented with standard flowers or souvenirs from various classes, including Eddy's class, which was leaving that year. To be honest, he was a little sad that he probably wouldn't see his favourite student again. But he hoped Eddy would at least let him know if he got into the university he wanted so Brett could enjoy his success with him.
He was in the music classroom, packing up his things, and putting flowers in the bag, when he heard a knock on the door.
"Come in," Brett called, thinking it was the cleaner telling him to hurry, or maybe Hyung, the math teacher who sometimes drove with him because they lived close to each other. But it was Eddy. He was wearing an unbuttoned navy blue suit with a slightly wrinkled white shirt peeking out. He looked good. Also, he was panting as if he had been running. Brett smiled at him.
"Good afternoon, Eddy. Did you leave something in the classroom?"
"No..." he responded in a breathless voice. "But I was hoping to still be able to catch you, Mr Yang."
He stepped inside and closed the door behind him, and Brett stopped packing and leaned against the desk instead.
"Oh? Do you need something?"
Eddy stopped a few steps in front of him. He wasn't smiling, he was serious, and it reminded Brett of their unfortunate meeting in the last term when Eddy... Well, nevermind.
"Mr Yang, I have something to tell you," he confessed and straightened up.
"Of course, you can tell me anything," Brett assured him. For some reason, he didn't have an uneasy feeling this time, he didn't think it was anything bad. He stayed positive.
"I love you."
It was the last thing Brett expected, so he was completely speechless, but he was sure that his cheeks were covered with the colour of at least a delicate pink.
"Oh..." he stammered at first but then laughed nervously. "Come on, Eddy, you don't have to cosy up to me, you know I'm not your teacher anymore from now on..."
"Exactly!" Eddy exclaimed with renewed passion and stepped closer, invading Brett's personal space for the second time during them knowing each other. He grabbed his hands. "So you have no reason not to respond the same!"
He was standing so close again, towering over him, and Brett was reminded once again that Eddy was a grown man, not a kid from elementary school. His heart was beating faster, but no one could blame him, it was a stressful situation...
Gently, not violently, he freed his hands from his grip.
"Eddy..." he began, perhaps a little indulgently. "You're a great guy, really, but..."
He saw the hurt in his eyes and felt sorry for him again.
"But what?" Eddy asked with a frown, and yes, he looked more like a child now, an offended child. "I'm not enough for you, Mr Yang?!"
Brett sighed. Adorable...
"Eddy, you're young. Your whole life lies ahead of you, studies, getting to know the world and other people that are more your age..." he tried to explain, but it seemed to him that it only annoyed Eddy more.
"So I'm too young for you?!" He looked indignant. "I'm mature for my age, you know it, Sir..."
"Eddy, it's more about the fact that I'm too old for you..."
Eddy turned around abruptly and crossed his arms over his chest.
"Whatever, who cares!" he shouted. "There are even people who are in relationships with a twenty-year difference!"
"Of course there are, but Eddy, I'm your teacher."
Eddy turned back to him.
"Not anymore! From now on, not anymore, you said it yourself, Sir!"
Oops. He actually did.
"So you're not going to get in trouble for that, are you?" Eddy continued. "You won't be fired, I'm not your student, and I'm an adult..."
The fact that he had thought this through made Brett wonder for how long had Eddy been holding in those feelings.
"You see, it's not just about the law. There will always be this... difference in the balance of power between us, you understand? The mere fact that you call me Mr or Sir is..."
"Brett," Eddy said quickly as if that would resolve the situation. "I can call you... uh... c-call you Brett. Because you're... Because your name is Brett."
Brett hadn't expected such a quick reaction from Eddy, and strange shivers ran down his spine (or perhaps he preferred to call them strange rather than wonder what they meant). He felt warm. Why was nothing getting through to this boy?
"But just think, what about your parents?" he asked. "They're definitely not going to let their son..."
"You said something else before! You said I should follow my dreams and study music, you said I should not worry about them..."
"This is something completely different, Eddy."
"You're only talking about others, Mr-, uh, Brett," his student remarked. Brett could see that it was really hard for him to suddenly change his way of addressing him. - What about you, S-... What about you? What do you think about me? I'm not cut out for a boyfriend? I'm not your type? You do not love me back? We spent so much time together and I thought you felt something for me too, anything... Please give me a chance..."
"E-Eddy..." he stammered, feeling strangely embarrassed. "You're my student... I like you, of course, but I treat you at most like a y-younger brother..."
Eddy took his face between his hands without any warning and kissed him.
Brett got dizzy and had to grab the edge of the desk. When Eddy pulled away, it took him a moment to be able to think again. He could almost still feel Eddy's lips on his and it was...
"Don't ever do that again." The indulgence was over. He had to be serious. "Since you're so grown up and mature, you should know that you shouldn't kiss someone without permission. You do realize you could even be charged with assault, right?"
"But Brett..."
"For you, it's Mr Yang," he interrupted sharply, pushing his desk chair back and sitting down, trying to signal the end of the conversation.
Eddy's eyes became glassy again.
"No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you angry!" he called out with some despair in his voice and sat down on his knees beside him. "Please..."
Brett tried, he really tried. But as soon as he looked at that sad face, his heart melted completely. He petted Eddy's hair.
"Come on, Eddy. Everything is fine. You just surprised me."
"But are you... rejecting me? I just imagined all our moments together?"
Brett pursed his lips, not knowing what to say. After all, he treated Eddy like a child, like a brother, like a...
Eddy's eyes were glittering as he was waiting for his answer, his lips were slightly parted and looked soft (actually Brett even knew they were), his jaw nicely defined now as he put his head forward, perfect lines, that you could trace with your fingers, and his neck was so tight and long... Eddy took his hand in his. His hand was warm and Brett could clearly feel the calluses on his fingertips.
"Brett...?" Eddy repeated his name again, waiting for an answer, and an electric current shot through him.
He yanked his hand away violently and crossed his arms as if in a defensive position, shielding himself from these feelings. He looked away too because he couldn't bare to look at Eddy's face now.
"Mr Yang?"
"Eddy, go to university," he ordered firmly.
"Huh?"
"Go to university, meet new people, live a little. Experience the new academic year as best as you can."
"But Sir, I-" Eddy tried to protest, but Brett cut him off again.
"And if after a year you will still think of me in that way... Then come back and ask again. We'll talk again then," Brett decided, and for a moment there was no answer.
"Really?" Eddy asked quietly, and he nodded.
His student stood up and let out a cry of joy, again with a smile on his face.
"So you do feel something for me!"
"I didn't say that."
"No, but you're giving me a chance! Why else would you be doing this?"
Brett didn't have a clear answer to that question, just a blush on his face.
"I'll be back! I will definitely come back!" promised Eddy cheerfully, and Brett rested his face on his hand, trying very hard not to smile. "And when I return, you'll have no reason to turn me down!"
"We'll see," Brett muttered. "You can't know that. Maybe you'll meet someone. Fall in love."
"That's not going to happen, Sir."
"How can you know that?"
"Because I'm already in love."
Eddy flashed another smile and ran out of the room, and Brett buried his face in his hands, feeling like the last fool with that loud beating heart.
Ah, he was already a lost case...