Marshall's P.O.V.
"Daddy, that woman that took me, was she really my grandma? Cause she told me she was," Sienna asks me quietly, huge hazel eyes that are a mixture between mines and her momma's staring up at me as I'm tucking her in her bed before sleep time.
Aisha and myself usually do it together, but my wife is dealing with a lot of shit right now, her mom's death really hit her hard and she's been locking herself away in our bedroom the whole time.
I inhale a large pocket of air through my teeth, thinking on what to say to her. I could lie I suppose, but thing is I ain't like lying to my kids. Plus children are way smarter than we give them credit for.
"She was, honey," I finally admit.
"So, how come I've never met her before? And how come she said mommy didn't like her. And why would she and the mean guy lock me in a room and stuff?" Sienna asks me all sweet and innocent like.
Fuck am I supposed to tell her now, that her mother's ma was a goddamn crackhead that abandoned her own daughter and now had snatched her up for ransome?
But then wait, it gets even worse, yo, cause Sienna keeps on asking me questions. The only good thing here being that at least this girl don't seem one bit as traumatized as both myself and Aisha was worried she would be, more like curious. Sienna is my seed after all, she's a Slim Shady's kid and nothing fazes her the way it would some rich asshole's brat
"And where's grandma now?" My daughter now asks me.
"Honey, grandma is dead," I state and Sienna's big eyes widen just slightly then.
"Dad," she starts to say.
I smile and kiss the top of her head.
"Sienna, baby, one day when you are old enough to understand everything, I swear to God, both me and your mommy will sit down with you and explain everything to you. But right now it's just..."
"Too complicated for me, daddy? Okay, I get it," Sienna pouts, rolling her eyes at me just like her momma does sometimes.
Welp, glad we got that out of the way.
"Complicated is a big word, sweetheart, I'm proud of you," I smirk and kiss her head again, pulling the covers more over her and tucking them under her chin. "Now go to sleep, baby, okay? Want me to sing to you?"
"Okay, dad. But mommy usually is the one that sings to me. Can you sing the way mommy does?"
"I doubt that, baby," I chuckle. "But dad will try his best."
Afterwards, I make my way back into mine and my wife's bedroom.
Finding Aisha sitting on top of the bed Indian style, twirling a small object in her had that once I get closer, I can see that it's her cell phone. She's also got a notepad laying on the bed next to her, where she was apparently trying to scribble some sing lyrics down, presumably to get some of her feelings out.
And see normally, I would make fun of her for that, cause look at her, trying write in bulky ass notepads and shit, instead of on her phone, doing the same exact thing she was making fun of me for only days ago.
But obviously right now won't be the right time for that.
So instead I simply sit down next to her.
Aisha barely seems to even notice me being there though, seemingly lost in thoughts, lost in her own little world.
She's been like this ever since the news broke of her moms.
She completely shut down.
That whole night after us coming back home from the morgue after identifying Candance's body, she stayed deadly silent. And once again, no fucking tears, no nothing, which worried me.
Cause once again this is the chick that usually wears her whole heart on her sleeve we are talking about here. Aisha is emotional as fuck, so for her not to be so is just ain't right, you know?
I have no idea what's going on in her head right now, and I ain't even gonna front, it kind of scares me.
Cause I usually can read this girl like an open book.
But this whole mess with her mother, as much as I feel for her, I can't exactly say I can relate. Just cause of my own fucked up relationship with my own moms. And my deadbeat sperm donor of a father. I mean, don't get me wrong, I understand one hundred percent how it feels like to have been abandoned by your own parent, but I can't relate mourning them if they died, especially if right before dying, them motherfuckers had tried to kidnap one of my kids. After something like this, I would say fuck them and celebrate their deaths instead of mourning them.
Aisha isn't like this, though, she ain't like me though, and I know that she must feel some type of way.
And it kills me that I can't get through to her and make her see the light right now, take some of her pain away.
And the very first thing the next morning, I unfortunately gotta leave for
the shoot of the No Love music video with Lil Wayne. Something that's been arranged months prior, long before this whole shithole of a situation happened.
"It's okay, Marshall, just go," Aisha whispers to me early on the morning when I wake her to let her know I have to leave, but also telling her imma cancel that shit and be there for her in a heartbeat.
Aisha then tells me that work is work and I should just go, and to remain a professional on set too.
I tell her I would.
But in the end, I couldn't do that shit however, even if my life depended on it.
Couldn't fucking commit.
I mean, yeah, I've learned over the years how to separate personal life and business, but right now, at this very moment, I'm just not able to.
All I can think about is how I would rather be at home with my damn girl, comforting her right now, and worry about what she must be currently going through.
During the videoshoot, I'm distracted as a motherfucker on set. Sidetracked.
I lip synk through my verses, moving from one point on the set of the music video to another like a robot.
Wayne and I have to film this one sequence where we both have to stand side-by-side to each other and rap, and we are completely out of sync with our movements, me literally just going through the motions to get it over with.
Apparently, a few days later, the footage of me and Wayne making the video would leak on YouTube.
W
ith motherfuckers roasting me about how I was all off beat and shit and had looked like how I would rather be anywhere but there, and guess what?
Y'all are goddamn right. My mind wasn't in it that day, and I couldn't help it.
"You cool, dawg?" Wayne asks me when we take a small break from filming. "Seems like you going through something, my nigga," he speaks lazily, lightning up a blunt.
My eyes unconsciously following his gestures.
I then frown, looking down at my sneakers.
Truth be told, I wish it WAS me going through some shit right now. Cause if it were just my own issues, then I would be able to put it all aside and concentrate on what I'm currently doing for the time being. Concentrate on work. It ain't as easy to do that when it concerns somebody I care about however.
"It's all good, man," I reply to Wayne conchalantly. He's a chill dude, but we ain't exactly close. I ain't about to spill my guts about what's going on with my wife to him.
"Well shit, son. Whatever it is clearly bugs you a lot," Wayne shrugs, not prying though, which I appreciate. "Don't let the shit get to you though, it ain't worth it, you know?"
It actually is though. But I don't say shit.
I grit my teeth and I push through. And the way the actual video was edited afterwards, you won't even notice the struggle, I don't think.
Still, I couldn't wait to get out of there.
Making my way home, I find Aisha exactly where I have left her eaelier.
Laying in bed with the covers drawn over her face.
My fucking heart which I ain't even know I that I had one of those until I've met this damn girl, drops as I climb underneath the covers with her.
"Baby?" I ask her ever so softly. "Were you sleeping all day?"
"What if I was, Marshall?" Aisha shrugs, sounding emotionless as fuck.
I don't know what to do with her and how to help her and I start to get desperate.
Pulling the covers aside some more, I pull her body towards mine and immediately feel her stiffen up like she don't even want me to touch her, so I let her go. Aisha lays on her side of the bed, facing away from me.
Fuck it, man. I'll just address the elephant in the room, and I don't even know how to be tactful about it neither so I won't even attempt to.
"Listen, Aisha. I know you are upset about your moms, but that woman had made her own choices in life. And every one of those decisions has brought her to this outcome. How she ended up. I know it sounds harsh, but it's the honest motherfucking truth. And you can't be sitting over here slowly wasting away and shit, and..."
"Marshall, I need you to listen to this," Aisha mumbles softly, abruptly throwing the covers back and feeling with her hand over the nightstand at her side of the bed, until she grabs her cell phone from it.
Quickly dialing what appears to be her voice-mail, she practically shoves the small device in my hand.
I frown and sir up facing her, putting the phone to her ear.
Candance Jones's raspy voice immediately coming through from the other end of the line.
"Aisha, I just want to say sorry, baby girl. I know I've always been a horrible mother to you and that you probably hate me right now. You would hate me even more once Sienna is returned to you and she tell you it had been me along that done took her. I really don't know what I was thinking, baby. It's just that that day I showed up at y'all doorstep and it was so easy for that husband of yours to hand me all that money in exchange for me to leave y'all alone. It put this thought in my head that the two of you was shitting money out of your asses anyhow and could afford to part with some more. And I really do need that money, baby. And not just for what you think neither. I mean, sure, I wanted to keep getting high, and don't you dare to judge me for neither, girl, cause you have absolutely no idea what it feels like to have that monkey on your back! But then, I also needed the cash, because I'm in deep shit, baby. Me and my friend Alonzo, we've owed a lot of money to some very dangerous people. And if we don't pay up they might kill us and I'm so scared of them, Aisha. Now Alonzo done fucked me over, he done took all of the money we got from you for my grandbaby, and he took off, leaving me to deal with those motherfuckers on my own. And I just can't, I've seen what they can do before, to the people that cross them, so I..."
There's a loud beef then, signaling the end of the voice-mail, also indicating that Candance had most likely ran out of time alloted for leaving the message, or she would still be talking.
I take the phone away from my ear and press the end call button.
"It.. um... the time she left the message, it was minutes before she had hanged herself," Aisha says to me quietly as I place the phone laying next to me on the bed.
"She was so scared of whoever it was that was after her that she chose to just kill herself rather than dealing with them, and I could've helped her, Marshall!! I could've given her more money if I knew..." Aisha's voice breaks. "But I just abandoned her!! For all these years after finding her for the first time at that warehouse, I never reached out to her..."
"Baby, we've been through this shit before. You couldn't help somebody that ain't want ya help. Your moms..."
"Has made her own choices in life, yes, I know!! Keep sounding like you are saying my mother deserved this shit, Marshall!" Aisha suddenly screeches, and I have to take a double take at her right now. Her hand flies towards my face, but I grab her wrist, intercepting it.
"Yo, what the..."
"And don't think I didn't hear what she had said on that voice-mail about you paying my mom off to make her go away neither, boy! When the hell was that?!" My wife angrily questions me.
"A couple of months ago," I then sigh and admit.
"Months ago, MONTHS ago, Marshall?! And you never thought to tell me?!"
"Listen, I was only tryna protect you, yo! That's why I ain't tell you shit!"
"Ugh, of course!! You know what, maybe it was all your fault then," she suddenly blurts out then.
And I'm so dumbfounded by the crazy shit she just spat at me, that I actually allow her to continue for a minute.
Then I grab her hands restraining her.
"Fuck you just say to me, yo?" I squint my eyes at her on genuine confusion.
Also anger.
Don't wanna feel it, cause I know her words come from a place of hurt, yet I still can't exactly help it. I'm fucking pissed.
"Marshall, you have hated my mother from the beginning. Maybe if you haven't sent her away that day..."
She's grasping at straws at this point.
I chuckle.
"Don't even try to put this on me, girl."
Watching all of the air to suddenly deflate from her lungs as tears start to stream down her face.
"You are right, Marshall," Aisha whispers, shoulders instantly deflating. "Everything that's happened is actually my fault, and my alone. I should've never turned my back on my mom..."
"Jesus fucking Christ. No, it ain't your fault neither, Aisha!! Hell nah!!
"Just stop, Marshall!!"
Pushing me as hard as she possibly can, she tries to jump out of the bed and run out of the room.
I cuss under my breath, snatching her up and pinning her to the bed.
She really went from a zero to a hundred in a matter of seconds in her grief. I climb on top of her and restrain her as gently as I can. I don't wanna hurt her but she needs to fucking chill.
Suddenly, she settles down again.
After a few seconds, I let go of her arms.
Only for her to put her hand at the back of my neck, pull my face down towards hers and smash her lips to mine.
This is wild as fuck to me cause I ain't expect this at all. I kiss her back out of habit. Just cause it's a natural reaction for me to do that whenever her lips touch mine.
Then I pull back.
"Aisha, fuck are you doing?" I question, frowning, but her hand is already pushing past the waistband of my pants and boxers at this point and she starts rubbing my cock which is already getting hard, despite me trying to think about all kinda shit that would get it to go down.
"I need a distraction, baby. From how much of a horrible person I am," she says sadly, but looking at me under her long lashes.
"Aisha, ain't a horrible person, so quite talking like that, aight?" I'm letting out through a clenched jaw, I swear sometimes this chick pisses me off.
Aisha reaches up her hand and lightly caresses the side of my face.
"Punish me," she states, looking me right in the eyes, and her words make me even angrier all over again. Cause fucking punish her for what?! She ain't done shit wrong!!
But then I'm also weirdly turned on too, and she knew I would be too, it's something about her looking at me through her lashes like that.
I shut my eyes then open them. She looks so damn vulnerable underneath me. Just like how she looked the day we've first met. Who am I kidding? My shit is literally rock hard right now. And that's what she wants anyway. And I'm a selfish motherfucker sometimes.
I put my hands on each side of her head, essentially caging her in on the bed.
"How you fucking want it, Aisha?" I ask quietly, trying to contain myself.
She looks me right in the eyes and kind of blushes.
"Be rough, Marshall. Make it hurt."
Fuck...
I lick my lips nervously, frowning as her words really sink in.
"Aight," I finally to her sternly. I motion with my hand to her, without really looking at her. "Turn around and bend over then. Get down on your hands and knees, face down ass up," I order her emotionlessly.
She complies.
Once she assumes the position, I rip her pants and panties off in one swift motion. Pulling my own t-shirt over my head, I get behind her, grabbing her hips. I pull my hand back, slapping her left butt cheek as hard as I can, leaving an angry read mark across her soft brown skin. Aisha whimpers and buries her face into the pillow in front of her. I show her no mercy, grabbing her thighs and spreading her legs further, I get in between them, sinking my teeth into the flesh of her thighs, simultaneously bringing my hand to her pussy at the same time, I push two fingers through roughly, while rubbing her slit with my thumb. I eventually replace my thumb with my tongue, lapping up all of the juices that start to sip out of her, but just as she's about to cum, I remove my hand and pull back.
"What the fuck, Marshall?!" She whines, turning her head towards me and looking back at me pleadingly.
"Ya said ya wanted to be punished, right?" I reply back coldly, pulling my pants and boxers all the way down. I grab her again and push her body against mine, slamming into her roughly.
I pound the fuck out of her, wrapping her hair around my fist, while my other hand goes around her throat and I squeeze it just enough to make her squirm underneath me, barely having any air to breathe. I choke the fuck out of her while continuing to slam in and our of her roughly, hitting her spot instantly, I can tell, cause that pussy is wet as fuck and pulsating around my cock. She drives her hips back me, bucking up against me as hard as she can. I let go of throat and pull harshly on her hair, fighting my own release at this point. She whimpers and her pussy contracts more around my dick.
I then pull out of her just as she was about to cum.
"Boy, fuck you!!" Aisha complains loudly, to which I chuckle.
I flip her around so she's laying on her back and grab her legs, placing them over my shoulders. I slam into her again, watching her face contract and her eyes damn near roll into the back of her head. Each time I drive into her, the top of her head is hitting the headboard of the bed which is slamming against the wall uncontrollably. Aisha cries out as I grunt, feeling sweat form on my forehead.
"Oh my God, Marshall, I'm gonna..." She moans loudly.
"No, ya ain't," I say back evilly and pull out again.
"Marshall!!" She scratches my back with her nails in frustration, practically stumping her foot against the bedsheets like a spoiled child. "I fucking hate your guts right now!!" She whines.
I slap her lightly across her face, gaining her attention.
"Thought you wanted me to punish you," I state evilly, looking at her frustrated face. Fuck, she's so fucking beautiful...
"Not like THAT!!" She whimpers.
"Oh, ya thought a punishment would actually feel GOOD, did ya? Shows just how much of a brat you are, Aisha," I sigh, grabbing her legs again. I place them around my waist this time, and she immediately gives into this position, wrapping her legs around me and running her fingernails all up and down my beck. She lifts her head and starts kissing my neck softly, leaving wet kisses all over, making me shudder. I grit my teeth and push her face back. "Stay in ya place, bitch!!" I bark, staring sternly at her.
When she looks back up at me, I almost lose it. Fuck is this girl doing to me, yo?! And how she can still do this to me after all these years?! I don't fucking know.
One thing for sure though, I'm done "punishing" her. I ain't wanna punish her in the first place.
I drop my whole body on top of hers, slamming my dick into her for the third time, but I move much more slower this time, cause I want her to really fucking feel it. Each time I drive inside of her, I make sure to go deep and hit her spot, and it shows all on her face. Tears stream down from the corners of her eyes and I wipe them off with my thumbs. I take her hands and lock them over her head, intertwining my fingers with hers.
"Are you close, baby?" I ask softly, seeing her trying so hard to fight it. Probably thinks imma stop again, but I ain't intending to. I couldn't stop this time if I wanted to, to be honest.
"So close," she finally gives in and whimpers.
"Cum for me then."
"I can't..."
"It's okay, Aisha," I encourage her. I kiss up her neck and to her ear, biting her lobe. "I fucking love you, baby," I whisper into her ear, and that sends her over the edge.
She tries to respond to me, but her words fail her as her pussy clamps around my dick, squeezing like a wise grip as she becomes undone underneath me. Just watching her, is more than enough for me to finish as well. I shoot my whole load into her, letting go of her arms and grabbing her jaw instead as I kiss her, collapsing on top of her.
We just continue to kiss for a while after that. Until we both need to come up for air. Aisha buries her face in my chest as I pull her towards me and she finally cries. Like really cries as I run my fingers through her long hair. Her sobs quickly turn hysterical, her body shaking against mine. I just pull her even closer to me, eliminating any kind of distance between us and kiss the top of her head. I ain't good with words at all. I mean, I am. When it comes to rapping. Not in a situation like this. So i don't try to comfort her with my words this time, since I've clearly botched that earlier, so I just hold her instead.