// Mother's Day is not just about those who made it possible for you to be brought into existence, but also about all those kindhearted individuals who helped shape who you are today. //
_
"Hanji, won't you tell me where we're going?" I asked for the third time within the last hour as I glanced in their direction.
We have been on the road for about two hours now, and as much as I wanted to get even a clue as to where we were headed, it was difficult to gauge since there were no notable landmarks that we passed through, and everything was just grass as well as the occasional farm animals. The only thing I was sure of was that we were already far from the city.
Hanji merely smiled softly at me, sending me a knowing look before keeping their eyes back on the road, "It's a surprise, my darling. I do appreciate you getting out of bed early this morning. I'm sure you're still feeling a little sleepy."
I didn't bother saying anything in defense, since Hanji knew (and saw) just how much I struggled to get out of bed this morning. Even now, despite my best efforts, I would still find myself falling in and out of sleep.
I reached out to them to lightly caress their face as I said, smiling to myself when I saw a hint of pink on their cheeks, "I don't mind going on a road trip as long as I'm with you."
"I feel the same way too, darling," Hanji answered as they leaned closer to my touch, "Soon, I'll take you to places you can only dream of going to."
_
My heart was pounding in my chest when I realized that we'd arrived at the cemetery.
I was barely aware that I was clutching onto my seatbelt as if my life depended on it until I felt Hanji gently pry my hands away, taking one into their own while the other carefully unfastened my seatbelt. I could barely remember when the last time I'd been here was. All I know was that it had been at least ten years since then.
It wasn't so much that I avoided it, especially since I had been so young when I was last here that I didn't remember much or anything else about it aside from how it looked. Moreover, it was too painful for me to go through alone.
Now, however, I wasn't alone anymore.
It was high time that I faced my fears as well as my past. After all, there was no better time to do it other than now, especially since I have my wonderful and incredibly supportive partner with me. I couldn't have asked for anything more.
We got out of the car without saying anything, and with each step I took, the memories began to stream as if a mental dam had suddenly fractured. I could feel Hanji's eyes on me, and for dignity's sake, I did my best to look composed. I knew I wasn't fooling them, though, as they tightened their grip on my waist ever so lightly, while occasionally kissing the top of my head.
I allowed myself to be led by them, until we finally stopped at a grave a few minutes later.
Mom.
Or at least, the mom I actually knew - the one who took care of me all these years. She might not have given birth to me nor brought me into existence, but she was the one who gave her life in exchange for mine without a second's hesitation.
I missed her so terribly, it physically hurt.
"It's been a long time, Mom," I softly said as I got on my knees and carefully sat down, with Hanji doing the same right beside me.
Both of us were silent for a few moments as we offered our prayers, and not long after, I felt Hanji's arm around my shoulders. Their touch was soothing, secure, and warm. Everything I could have hoped for in a partner, especially at this time.
"Darling, before anything else, I'd like to apologize to you for not letting you know that we were going here. I should've asked you first if it was alright with you, and we could've gone until you were ready," they told me softly, as if they were deeply regretting the decision.
While I knew where they were coming from, I felt the opposite, in reality, "You have nothing to apologize for, Hanji. If you had asked me about this before, I would've never been ready. It would've taken years and years, until I could only hope I could forget everything I've gone through." I glanced up at them and saw a worried expression on their face, as if they were fighting an internal battle. As an attempt to ease their struggle, I said in all honesty, "I'm thankful to you for bringing me here. For the first time in so long, I finally get to spend Mother's day with her."
_
It took me a long time to calm myself down after [possibly] an hour of crying. I was incredibly thankful for Hanji as they held me in their arms the entire time, gently stroking my hair and whispering comforting words to me, which honestly just made me cry more. At this moment, I truly wished that my mom could've met them in person, and not like this.
I'm 100% sure she would've approved of Hanji.
"I'm so sorry about this, Hanji. I even ruined your shirt...and you look really good in it too," I told them as I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand for the nth time, while they only chuckled softly in response.
While it was a fact that Hanji looked good all the time anyway, today was unexpected. They were dressed in a dark blue long-sleeved polo shirt paired with black slacks and dress shoes, as if they were going to a formal event instead of the cemetery.
"I beg to differ, love. This is a formal event, you know," Hanji playfully countered as they kissed my forehead, and I raised a brow in question, to which they answered, "I'm formally meeting my mother-in-law for the first time. Of course, I want to leave a good impression on her. I want to reassure her that her lovely daughter is always loved and well taken care of, and that she doesn't have to worry about anything at all."
They faced my mom's grave as they continued and sincerely started, "It's nice to finally you, Mrs. [L/N]. I am truly thankful that you took such great care of her, looked after her, and loved her with everything you had. If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have married such an amazing woman and partner. I have always been one who was never interested in anyone, but it all changed when I met your daughter. When I picture my life with her, a happily ever after suddenly doesn't feel far out of my reach. I promise that I will take such good care of her, to cherish her, to be with her through ups and downs, and to protect her with my life, as you had."
At their words, I could feel fresh tears threatening to resurface - no one has ever done this before, and it truly meant a lot to me that they were going through such lengths just for me. Hanji had left me utterly speechless, and I could only reach up to wrap my arms around them, burying my face on the crook of their neck.
After a few moments of comfortable silence, I was finally able to gather my wits about me, "You make me want to be a better person. With you, I feel safer than ever. My life has never been easy, yet you remained patient with me all throughout. You've been my rock, my anchor, and the one person who has kept me sane. Every day has been difficult for me, but knowing that I will always find you every day motivates me to keep going."
"This is embarrassing," I continued to somehow lighten up the mood before I began with the waterworks once more, "but one of the reasons why I couldn't visit her was because I couldn't remember where she was buried. I was young when they brought me here, and my condition didn't exactly help."
I heard them sigh softly, as if they were in pain, before wrapping their arms around me once more in a loving embrace. It took them a few seconds before responding, "I know, darling. Months back, I called your friend, Sasha, to ask how you spent Mother's day, or if you did in the first place."
Staying silent, I waited for them to continue as my heart beat wildly in my chest, "She told me that you would visit cemetery after cemetery, trying to find where your mom was buried."
"And you found her for me," I finished softly for them, and at this moment, I felt an overwhelming feeling of love and gratitude that I found myself wondering what greatness I did in my previous life to deserve to be with Hanji in this lifetime.
"Always, darling. You know I'd do anything to make and keep you happy," Hanji lightly kissed my lips, and I found myself unable to say anything just yet. All I knew was that at this moment, everything felt right.
Before I could let them know how grateful I am for taking me here, for spending time with my mom, and everything else in between, they held on to my hand as they said in an almost reverent tone, "and if one day, you decide that you want for us to have our own child to love, just know that I will completely be here to love and support you for the rest of our lives," Hanji paused for a moment as they tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear, leaning ever so closely as if to claim my lips once more, "I have no doubt that you will definitely be a great mother to them, as your mom has been with you."
[Author's Note]
Hi, everyone! I hope you've all been well all this time! I'm terribly sorry for not being able to update, since everything's been hectic since I moved. Rest assured that I will finish this story, and maybe publish a new one later one (when I get the time!) :D For now, I hope to upload side chapters and/or random prompts.
As always, take care and I hope you enjoyed this chapter!