Hey guys! New part! Had a few things on this week, but the best I could. I had no original plan to add any smut to this particular part and is why its a longer chapter but yes I wrote it in lol it just came out. So warning: there will be smut, I think lighter than the previous one though? Couldn't help it anyway lol. Anyways, enjoy guys! xxxx all!
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Ki's eyes slowly flicker open- her head hurts- in fact, her temple was throbbing and her head felt like it were full. She has a crackling headache making it hard for her to think... but her pillow feels unbelievably comfortable, and body felt amorously warm- dug into her bed and bedsheets... she squints, her vision starts to come into focus and begins to look around. Rafe laying next to her. Her wrapped in his blanket he'd been using in the cabin... it was all coming back to her quickly. He soundlessly sleeps- and the sight of him made her heart flutter incredibly fast...
Rafe's face close to hers... she were in nothing but her bra most probably- and she- at first- felt exposed... but he were covering her with his arm, drawn up his blanket to cover her- his arm were wrapped about her warmly- heavy but gentle- almost encasing her in a protective kind of way.
She breaths him in... her head swirls with the air of him... .
Her breathing calms, she lets herself relax into him...
He'd kind of looked sweet acutally... and that coming from Ki had meant alot... his lips slightly apart as he gently breaths- his brows lightly raised as if he was in another world- a peaceful place...
It wasn't a surprise to Ki that he had crashed out into such deep sleep- it's possible it had been the best sleep he'd had in a while- having slept on the hard cabin bench for the past few days... his eyes closed with a softness in his expression- he'd looked so gentle- lost in a depth of dreams.
His arm wrapped over her, laying on his front, encasing her into him- she felt warm... it was kind of warmly intimate... She had no need to leave- she had no urge to leave... her pulse melts away with a kind of warmth that brings a calm and the tense knot in her gut undoing itself away. She felt comforted- almost to the point she felt she wanted to bury herself deeper into him..... be cared for.
...maybe comfort was what she had craved... and it had felt nice... her tangled in his bedsheets, letting her mess- her problems dissolve away while she'd been with him was probably what might take some ache away... after all that had happened ?
Ki' eyes flicker over his face, taking a moment to take him in... his face slightly flushed but he looks sweet in his sleep, his brows relaxed in a way there is no way to describe how peaceful he seemed...
Handsome Rafe- Rafe from her kook years. Yep- the one she'd come to know... the one she'd promised she wouldn't get too close to... the one she is laying next to now...
In her kook years she'd kind of let her heart spark to Rafe... something she couldn't take back- something not so easily turned around... he had a kind of charm she liked- attentive, confident, straightforward, cocky... and came to realize that it all amassed to find he was actually maybe just kind of arrogant ... well- at least Ki viewed it that way. He also stood for so many things she hadn't... and in part- it kind of arised a tension between the two.
Hot-headed Rafe... self-asserting- self-entitled Rafe... that desire that makes her feel for him became murky- but she kind of had that held down... and she just kept her distance.
Ki kept her heart well-guarded from that- from falling for him... she knew how things would go if she ever let herself feel weak for the Rafe she'd gotten to know...
JJ on the other hand- carried very similar qualities to Rafe- both reckless, irresponsible, impulsive and at times out of control... but JJ... was much more selfless in her eyes... and Rafe to her- he had to be cruel to her friends... things only got worse between the two after he'd done some awful things.
His brows wrinkle and he snorts as she slips from under his arms, almost waking him. She needs to get up- JJ was on her mind now. She grabs new clothes from what Rafe bought her and heads for the restroom, has a shower to get herself refreshed... she trails a hand delicately over the bruises Rafe had left along her thighs from how firmly he'd held her when they had slept together... the night they had becoming vivid memories in her mind... she doesn't want to admit but being with him felt strangely liberating, even if he held her so rough... she has to ignore how it makes her blood run with something needy in her, tingling through her body, on thoughts of last night- and she wants to feel him run his hands over her all over again the way he had... but she needs to stop thinking that way- she could be entering dangerously into a place she knows she shouldn't... her and JJ were over but if she keeps letting Rafe in- she may eventually fall for him... and... if she lets herself feel anything for him... well, she knows how that may go...
She pops out and gets changed. She catches her reflection in the mirror...shit- she thinks to herself- the mark Rafe left under her jaw- she trails a finger over it lightly and sighs. Ofcourse he had to leave it blooming like that- it would take weeks for it to go... JJ will see it... if she were ever to still run into him anytime soon again. And she knows it would cause tension- a feud between the two- between all her friends in fact- and she would be in the middle of all of it.
She wanders back into the berth, tip-toes in so she doesn't wake Rafe. She grabs her phone and heads out of the cabin and onto the deck. The daylight blares brightly into her sore eyes, and she shields them with a hand as she walks out toward the bow of the yacht.
Why was she going to torture herself like this- scrolling back through JJ's last few messages... it's like she had to make sure it were all real... he'd sent her a photo of him and another girl... and she couldn't stop looking over it and torturing herself some more with it- like he knew she would... even after what she'd done he was ripping into her, like he wanted to rip into her, that's what he wanted- he had no idea how messed up that was. Why was she giving him another thought?- Maybe because he never thinks- he was always so impulsive- and sometimes he could be ruthless. He'd never thought of her- after all these years he'd known her... he treats her like she was nothing...replaceable just to make sure he got his point across.
It reminded her of the time he'd taken her dad's paper clip and said he was glad he'd done it- just to push her away... like she didn't matter.
She understood JJ went through hard times... but it didn't excuse what he did... he was hurting- and then he was hurting her back- is that what he wanted?
Her locking herself in the berth- in the tiny room- the previous day gave her plenty of time to think... gave her space from Rafe too... but, maybe it only made her feelings grow worse...
She wanders up to the end of the bow, scrolling through each individual message like she felt she had to... like she hadn't cut herself deep enough... she kind of wanted to scream and throw her phone so far into the ocean she'd never see it again... toss away all her agony- her anger and pain... because no matter what- she still cared for JJ... he was her... friend.
She doesn't care... he said he moved on- he never let her have her say- he just did what he wanted- what came to him impulsively... he was selfish for it too.
So maybe she did what was impulsive to her too... slept with Rafe... she didn't need to worry... she needn't justify a thing...
...but maybe sleeping with Rafe was something else... it wasn't planned- and it became possibly close to the best sex she'd had- untangling years of build up pented stress and tension, tugging away at her... she had to push away the thought of how good it had felt... push away how he made her feel...
She lowers herself down, sits with her legs to the side, closing her eyes and feeling the warm breeze play against her face.
She suddenly jolts, and her eyes open up to the sound of splashing- her eyes drift to the sound a fair distance away- a whale's tail emerging from beneath the water... it expels water into the air- a white thick spray erupting with force into the sky... then it crashes back down, submerging itself back into it's home... it's one of the most beautiful things she's ever seen. She huffs- surprised- her heart filled with something finally peaceful... nature could do that- give her peace of mind, and she lets herself breath all the fresh air in... a wide gleeful smile spreads across her face, and she almost feels her eyes well up... the emotions coursing through her were strong and had been causing her havoc, but this was truly beautiful... and real... and it makes her eyes want to water.
Her eyes dart around and came across Rafe wandering toward her, mussing up his hair... he appeared tired.. staggering a little with the movement of the yacht as he wanders onto the bow, his pace a little tentative, like his mind hadn't made up how he would be approaching her- scratching the side of his head.
He finally looks up, and his eyes lock to hers when he sees her watching him... her smile softened, and all his mind wants to think about was his hands all over her the previous night- her panting- her body tightening around him- his grip on her thigh-
He finally begins to realize her eyes seemed kind of glossy- like she were about to cry... was she going to lock herself back into the berth like she had the other day?- were his initial thoughts... he runs a hand through his hair, then his palms down the front part of his gray slacks as he approaches her slowly. He reaches her and blinks- not knowing what to say- sort of scared he may say something wrong- that could see her do exactly as what he thought she could do- return to the berth and not come out.
"Hey- how are you?" he questions, as he stands over her. He sniffs, and watches her curiously as he lowers himself down to sit next to her.
Her brows wrinkle at him, and then she looks away.
"Good. How about you?" she replies as her gaze travels back to where she'd seen the whale last- waiting to see if it would return- if it would do it again- see if she could catch it break through the water.
He clears his throat.
"I... I'm alright."
She nods her head once. He ducks his head, squeezing his eyes shut, dropping his head back... he brings his head back up and then sniffs as his gaze returns back to her.
"Listen- Ki- sorry- ok? Y-you know- if I was a little heavy on you last night... I didn't mean that... I mean, anything bad- alright?"
She shakes her head, playing and twisting her phone in her hand.
"Alright- all cool, Rafe."
His eyes don't leave her- assuming she wasn't completely telling him the truth... maybe she was just trying to brunt it down- ease some tension- let things pass- possibly make things less awkward...? but he wants to know that she's ok- to know what she's thinking- he'd always assumed she be mad at him for something he'd never know the reason to...
"Oh... yeah, ok." his words are drawn out. "I mean, sorry if I said anything- you know- that made you sad or upset or-"
"Rafe- it's ok-"
"I mean- I don't even remember if I lost control- because did I? Sometimes I'm so heated up a-and lost in the moment-"
"Why are you still talking-" she rasps, annoyed now.
"I don't know- I'm trying to apologize. I don't want you hating me over something I don't even know I've done- because that always seems to happen- you say you don't now but I think you'll think of something later-"
She leans in quickly and surprises him when she pecks him on the cheek lightly to prove him what he thought was wrong... to make him worry less and see if it would shut him up. Her mind had been on things but not on anything he'd done.
He huffs out a surprised smile, eyes wide watching her. His eyes drop to her lips.
"I'm not upset... even if you called me a stuck up princess... ok? Which I'm not." she scoffs with a faint smile.
He lets his gaze fall to the mark he'd left her just beneath her jaw, and he lowers his head down toward his lap between his legs... a cocky lopsided smile rolling on his lips.
"Was... ahhh, you know- was I ok?" he lifts his head up looking out at the ocean, his smile growing.
She groans with a smile.
"Don't ruin this- ok?-" she cries at him and then glances at him curiously. "Did you not just see the whale? Like maybe just focus on what's in front of you now and don't ruin it. Don't say anything other than how special the sight of that whale was- ok?"
"Sorry." he bites back his laugh. He slides a glimpse at her, wondering what she is thinking- wondering if she remembers how she called his named as he was getting her off... she was drunk but he kind of feels she remembers.
She shifts a little- like she wanted to get something off her chest... but then holds on to it. She lifts her legs up, bringing her knees to her chest and hugs them.
She gives in-
"Ummm... anyway, you wouldn't understand but... something is literally crushing me inside right now, that's why I'm like the way I am... do- do you know what I mean?"
"Urmm, no- not really."
"I mean- JJ... I'm not a bad person-ok?"
"Never said you were."
Her eyes dart over him, a worried look on her- he doesn't know anything of what JJ did- she'd never mentioned a thing to him- he must think she's a bad person-
"Listen... JJ and I are having problems- ok? And personally I think his taken things too far." she says a little exasperated- feeling a tide of emotions overwhelm her again- like she needed get to it all off her chest. "He probably went as far as cheating on me- so, I don't know- he never made that clear- and it seemed like he did- the dude gave up on us so freakin quickly like I meant nothing- dropped me without talking through things first... He said we were over- he was moving on..." she speaks fast, everything stumbling out all at once. "I'm not doing things with someone who clearly doesn't give me time to explain- or someone who doesn't even respect me- h-how I feel- Do you get what I mean, Rafe?" she cries. "I don't care- I don't." she scoffs angrily, almost like she'd been trying to convince herself. "Why am I even telling you all this?" she whimpers, under her breath like she'd been asking herself.
His eyes came to her face... lowers to her mouth as she talks... but he seems a little disappointed at the way she's so focused on JJ.
"Y-yeah- well- I told you- those pogues are all the same... like a different breed, or somethin'. Always told you that- don't tell me I didn't warn you- it's what I've always been telling you-"
She groans hard, and can't hold how she needs to cut him off.
"What? No Rafe-" she glares at him outraged. "Oh my god- why are you like this?" she cries, rubbing a hand over her temple.
"Nah- yeah- sorry- yeah- I meant..." he thinks fast, pursing his lips back hard, irritated. "I know- I get it-" he clears his throat- attempting to correct himself so she wouldn't snap back... so they wouldn't begin another argument... he'd liked how they'd actually made progress.
"You know I'm full pogue- right?-"
He shakes his head, a humored smile on his face, lowering his head away.
"Sure... whatever you say Ki."
"I am." she cries at him, she couldn't believe he didn't believe her. She wonders why he's still smiling. "So if we are going to categorize us- hmm? I'd prefer to never be categorized into being a kook. That category should be placed at the far bottom... the problem of society- to be a bunch of out of touch rich people who ignore the socio-economic injustices that we are facing- it's happening all around them and they turn their eyes to it... and if anything- that shows they are the lower kind of people out there."
He purses his lips back, trying to hide his smile now.
"Your always so melodramatic-" he laughs softly, mockingly.
She flips him off, sighs and looks away.
He turns to sneak a glance at her- his veins begin to fill with something thick in them... he finds himself admiring her instead- he doesn't know to put it but she can sometimes mesmerize him... her skin glistens beautifully in the sun... her skin tender, and soft... he wants to trail his finger all over her delicately again. He holds himself back from saying anything dumb.
"Sorry... your not dramatic." he dips his head and watches her with a look she can't decipher... "Y-you... your beautiful Ki..." he says, eyes darting over hers before he clears his throat and looks away. "T-that's all I have to say." He shifts once where he sits. "So what does it matter."
Ki's eyes flicker over him gently- her cheeks fluster.
"Well..." he continues. "W-well not all I have to say..." he cocks his head, squeezing his eyes shut as he thinks. "Your kind of sweet too." he smirks, but in a sweet way. "A-and smart... sometimes, at least- not when you're hanging around them.' he fidgets with his hands, and brows dip as he says this and thinks. "But you have the most pure heart I know- Ki... always doing the right kind of things... always thinking about others. Too much sometimes.. I don't think people realize how special you are. You're far too sensitive sometimes but that just means your heart is big, and you care. And it kind of shits me when you put yourself last for those pogues-"
"So I'm not irritating to you?" she says cutting him off before he says anything that may ruin what he had just said before- then ruin how she feels for him right now.
"Well- ahh-" he swallows trying to find the right words- he remembers calling her that last night too before he'd slept with her...
It takes but a few seconds and Ki takes his face with her own hands- knowing perfectly well she were crossing a line she'd promised herself she wouldn't- she arches herself into him to get closer and catches his mouth with hers, kissing him slowly... drawing in all his air to make it all her own- make her head dizzy, fill it with him instead of all her thoughts... she wanted to chase the feeling he was making her feel... even if it meant she were letting him in... but he were making her feel good at a time everything else seemed to be crashing down around her-
Rafe takes her face with his own hands, cupping her cheek and pulling her into him to kiss her firmly.
She glides a hand down his chest, and along his leg as his kissing her back. He pants, surprised. "Y-you know what you're doing right?" he groans, taking her by the waist and pulling her on top of him, onto his lap- bringing her mouth back to his- smiling as he kisses her.
"Maybe I just want-" she moans as she feels his teeth scraping against her lower lip, flitting her eyes closed. "-forget."
He doesn't hesitate to pick her up and bring her back to the berth... and he lowers her onto his bed.
She gives him these eyes- pure and bright- full of her emotions- they achingly search his face sweetly... he trails a hand delicately down the side of her face, then leans himself in smiling as he kisses her. He slides off his slacks, bringing her shorts and underwear down next. She helps him with his boxers as he reaches over to pull out a box to pull a condom from within it. ... he slots himself between her legs- tipping her chin up for her to look at him. "Keep your eyes on me Ki." he says as he pulls her leg around his back... he loves her eyes, and he wants her to see him- he wants her to know he could treat her better than JJ... maybe she would give him more of her if he shows her he could do that...
She feels his heart beat against her own chest as he lays over her and his skin drags against her body as he begins to move and then he thrusts himself into her. Her eyes flutter back as she gasps, Rafe groans, watching her with a faint smile. "Ki, look at me." he says... his vivid blue eyes striking- stunning- and solely focused on her... his hand runs along her thigh, pulling her focus back onto him- his eyes. Her eyes flitter open and tries to maintain her gaze on him, but it's too much when he dives deeper. Her back arching into him, her eyes closing- her legs tightening around his back as he keeps his momentum strong, clutching to his arm firmly. Rafe's head spins- his hands clutch to her side firmly- an effort to hold himself back from finishing- his blood rushes through him making him want to shatter quickly. He lowers his mouth to drag his lips over hers as his moving, eyes flickering over hers as he watches her panting against his lips... he thinks she sounds sweeter than any sound his ever heard. He slows to a slower steadier pace... taking time to drink her all in- everything about her... if he was going to get another chance with her- he was going to have to make it count- make it something special- something he can have time to imprint every detail of her into his memory. His nose brushes lightly against hers, letting his lips kiss her slowly. The way he was being so gentle- tender, something growing in her heart and it felt full... she pulls him down pressing her lips into him more firmly. He changes his angle, tilting her hip up- pressing her other leg into him as he begins to speed up... building up pressure incredibly fast, building her up to the edge faster- making her fall apart as he's still kissing her... and then he follows a second later.