Dhruv stood at the platform waiting for Kushi. Through the buzz and the crowd, he could feel Rian was on edge and he would start wailing any minute now. Dhruv himself was anxious that Kushi was going to ditch him at the last minute.
The train was announced and yet Kushi was nowhere to be found. He felt lead settle in his chest. What had he expected? There was anger brewing in him, more towards himself rather than her. He felt like a fool for trusting her again. Hells Bells, he thought how could he have ever trusted her again? Was once not enough?
Before he could admonish himself further, he caught her rushing towards him wading through the sea of people. She waved to him to wait. It was almost astonishing how she could catch his eye even in a crowd of people. It was as if his eyes were made to seek her out.
"I'm sorry I'm late. Traffic. I slept late."
She said huffing and taking deep breaths. Then she looked at the baby strapped to his chest and he felt her turn to stone right that moment. Her face held a passive emotion and she looked as if she was going to throw up any minute now.
"Are you okay?" He couldn't help but ask. She snapped out of her daze but then the shutters were still up. She curved her lips in a pretend smile and waved her hand as if to say that she was fine but he knew she wasn't.
That was what had made it painful. They knew each other inside out, hadn't they? They had loved each other once. They had shared their breaths and now it was awkward once again to pretend like they were strangers.
The train rushed past them and they waited until the crowd rushed in. They boarded in and to his surprise, Rian was fast asleep already.
While they say in their seats, he saw Kushi who has opened a book and began studying. He wasn't keen on making conversation with her so he just put on some earphones and closed his eyes. If this was before their separation, he would've made a quip or started a conversation. But those days were long gone. There was a great deep chasm between them.
As he was nodding off, Rian began to squirm. He began to give out soft cries. Dhruv looked at his smartwatch, it was close to 5 which meant it was time for his dinner. He stood up adjusting the straps of the baby carrier and bobbed to calm Rian.
Dhruv cringed as Rian started wailing loudly. He made a shh sound and tried to look for the bag where he had kept the milk bottles. Rian wailed louder and he looked helplessly at Kushi. But she was staring down at her book with a pencil in her hand. He was about to ask her help but she seemed deliberately avoiding him.
"Kushi..." He had barely called out her name and she stood up abruptly, her face gray and sickly.
"I have to go to the..." She said and rushed away from him as if she was running away from a predator.
"Do you want me to take him?" There was someone who called out to him and it was a woman who pointed at the baby.
Dhruv let out a sigh of relief and loosened the straps and handed the baby over to her. He immediately turned to look at the overhead compartment. He dragged the bag down and took out the milk bottle.
Shaking the bottle, he sat down beside the woman who was bobbing Rian up and down. "Are you hungry baba????" She cajoled him and Rian looked at the stranger, teary-eyed.
"Can I?" She looked at the milk bottle and he handed it to her. Rian grabbed onto the bottle immediately, "There you go. You must be hungry." She whispered and Dhruv felt his heart pang.
There were certain times he didn't know what he was doing with Rian. All his friends had tried to discourage him from adopting because they thought that children needed moms more than dads. And there were times when he wondered if he had made a huge mistake by adopting Rian.
"Oh, he's falling asleep.... what's his name?"
That snapped him out of his thoughts, "It's Rian."
"Rian." The woman said again tugging at his chin. She pulled away the milk bottle handing it to him and he screwed on the cap.
***
By the time she went back, Kushi made sure she was composed and back to feeling nothing. When she walked back to her seat, she found that Dhruv wasn't there anymore, he was on the opposite seat beside a woman who was cuddling the baby.
"I'm so sorry I never introduced myself. I am Shri. Well, my full name is Devashri but I go by Shri." She said and she was like a beam of sunshine. Khushi rolled her eyes, God it was the oldest trick in the book, she knew. Hell, she had written that book.
"I'm Dhruv. Nice to meet you."
Khushi felt her chest twist in an ugly manner and she walked to her berth and slumped down. She knew they were looking at her. She looked at them too.
"Oh. I'm his wife." Khushi said in her most nonchalant voice ever.
That did dim the hope in her eyes and Khushi felt a small twinge of satisfaction in her chest as she opened her book and tried to ignore the female version of Dhruv latch on to his every word.
***
Khushi was annoyed. She was surprised at her range of emotions on this particular day. She went from feeling annoyed to feeling all sorts of things. It was getting harder to control her eye-rolling.
Oh god, they were so similar. That was the most annoying part. As if that wasn't enough, she had to go to the same venue for the same wedding as them. Hell! What were the chances?
Khushi thought that maybe this was her punishment. To watch the person, she had wronged fall in love with the perfect girl. She couldn't take it anymore. She was this close to making faces at them and acting childish.
By the time they reached the hotel, she was thoroughly regretting coming to this wedding. She regretted suggesting that they pretend to be a married couple. Anyone who looked at the trio could easily mistake them for a couple and not her.
When she got out of the car, she was immediately enveloped in a hug. "Oh my god Bhabhi! I'm so glad you're here."
Kushi plastered a smile on her face and smiled at Dhristhi. She had only seen Dhristhi in pictures and they shared the usual annual wishes on WhatsApp but Khushi was surprised that the girl she knew had grown into a woman.
"Dhristhi! I'm glad too! Thank you for inviting me!"
"So, I'm to be sidelined then?"
"Bhai!" She watched her go on to hug him but she stopped. "Oh! Who is this?" She asked, looking at the baby in his arms.
"It's Rian."
"What? You had a baby? And you didn't tell me?!" Dhristhi looked at them surprised.
"We were busy...." Dhruv said.
"Oh, I have a nephew. He's cute." She said looking at the baby. "God. I'm so shocked. You should've told me Bhai."
An awful silence fell in the lobby and they all raised their heads to look at Dhariya Kapadia who stopped stiffly beside Dhristhi.
Khushi looked at the man who was supposed to be the reason why she had acid thrown on her face and to her surprise, she didn't feel the bitterness that she thought she would feel. The man looked old and all she felt now was pity for him.
She could feel the tension between the father and son as the old man looked at the baby in Dhruv's arms. "Dad." Dhruv was the first to break the ice.
"Dad, it's your grandson," Dhristhi said softly. The man just made a sour face and grunted.
"What's his name?" he asked directly, pinning his gaze on her. She panicked. She didn't know what the baby was named.
"His name is Rian." Dhruv pitched in and she breathed a sigh of relief.
Nothing was said after that and they were immediately shown their rooms.
Khushi was exhausted. The day had been emotionally and physically draining. Dhruv told her that he would first like to shower and bathe the baby so that he could go to sleep and she agreed.
She looked around the hotel room and the memories of their wedding night rushed in. She felt like that was a lifetime ago and now this was her hell.
****
Dhruv tried to bob Rian. But he wouldn't stop crying and go to sleep. He shushed and tried bobbing again walking around the room.
The door to the bedroom opened and Khushi walked in with red sleepy eyes. "I can hear him in."
"He just does this. He is usually awake at night but he never makes a fuss like this."
"Did you give him milk?" She asked and it took all of him to not snap. He was doing his best he knew.
"Yes. I tried. He isn't hungry."
At that moment Rian wailed louder. "Damn, do something. He's going to pull down the roof! It's 2 am!" She told him cringing.
"I am trying! If you can't help, why don't you go back to ignoring me like you did on the train?" He snapped. That was the end of his patience. She looked wide awake now.
He regretted those words as soon as they left his mouth. He wasn't quick to anger usually but these past months it had been difficult controlling his anger.
She turned around to walk away and he internally cursed himself for losing his temper. It made him more distraught that she walked away from him, leaving him, saying nothing. He knew of women who lost their tempers at the drop of the hat but she hadn't, not even once the entire day. She had shown no emotions at all, even when he had flirted with Shri for the exact purpose of inciting a reaction out of her. He knew that she had noticed yet she had said nothing.
"Lay him on the counter, just for a moment...." She had her purse in her hand and she walked to the counter and nodded her head towards it. He laid the baby down and held him there. He watched her open the bag and pull out her stethoscope. She put it out and checked the baby's heartbeat. She then pressed the baby's stomach, pulled his ears, she also checked his temperature.
"Well? What's wrong?" He asked anxiously as she put away her things.
"Nothing. Nothing is wrong. Come with me. Just put him in his crib."
He followed her to the bedroom and put Rian in the crib and he still fussed. He looked around for her and watched her come from the bathroom. He went to pick him up again.
"Don't pick him up...wait..." She spoke.
She sat on the edge of the bed and plugged in the hair dryer and started it as it gave a full whir.
"Just pat him now, like this." She patted his arm softly. He followed her instructions and did that. To his surprise, Rian had calmed down after a few minutes and drifted to sleep.
She tugged at his t-shirt telling him to stop. He nodded. She climbed onto the other side of the bed and left the one close to the crib empty.
He switched off the night lamp and groaned as he lay down on his back. The room was quiet except for the whirring of the hair dryer. He had half a mind to apologize for snapping at her but then he said,
"How did you know what to do?"
For a minute he thought she was asleep or going to ignore him again but she did answer him,
"What is he? Like around 4 months now?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah, they usually do that around the 4th month. You just remember. Usha was quite a nice sleeper but Asha, god she used to cause chaos every single night."
"Right." He chuckled. He rubbed his face tiredly. "It used to take a village to make her sleep!" He laughed.
"It was awful. I remember nodding off in class one day because she had caused such a ruckus that might." She said between gasping breaths.
"You've told me that..." He said.
"I was interning in the Pediatrics Department and on the night shift there used to be this rush of worried parents. The nurses there taught me this. Sometimes it's hunger, or gas, or an ear infection but mostly it's just something they do around the 4th month. They have sleep regression to be exact. It just means they're developing."
"Oh." He said. The apology was at the tip of his tongue but before he could utter it, he saw her shifting on her side with her back towards him.
"Goodnight Dhruv." She said yawning.
Well, he decided to take comfort in cowardliness.
"Goodnight Khushi."
****
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