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R.HAMILTON
River never felt like this.
Her skin on fire.
Her heart a million times faster than its regular pace.
Short on oxygen, she panted as Harry explored her skin with his soft lips, their only mark of presence the wet kisses he peppered all across her body. The gentle scrape of his teeth, and the caress of his hot breath against every inch of her.
No amount of imagining lived up to the way he made her feel in that moment. It was as if her body had come alive and experienced pleasure for the first time. Toes curled, skin hot, belly sizzling with a sensation she felt all the way to the bottom of her spine. Goosebumps covered her everywhere, her nipples peaked and hard, breasts heavy from the impending waves of pleasure she knew Harry would no doubt give her.
When River glanced down her exposed body, and caught the way her chest rapidly moved, Harry's gaze locked on her. It stayed that way as he hooked her legs on his shoulders and pulled her closer to his upper body, his chin millimetres from where she ached from him with need. He teased her more than she expected, played with her until she writhed for something more. When it was just River and her hands, she barely paid herself attention, too eager to reach that blissful moment.
Harry enjoyed the time he spent exploring her body. He paid attention to the way she breathed harder and faster when he found her soft spots, and it was an extreme confidence boost to her when she asked for something and he did exactly that. The sounds he made were of pleasure from pleasuring her, and it made her blood turn to fire.
Every time she echoed, "Fuck, that feels so good," or, "I'm so close," Harry growled between her thighs and pressed into her further as if the words turned him on even more—though that seemed almost impossible. River could barely hold onto anything, her mind spun in circles until she almost felt dizzy. Harry's hand clasped around her fingers and guided her touch between his curls to bring her focus back on him.
His bedroom filled with the sound of her wetness on his lips. Her body vibrated with the low rumbles of his words. "You taste so good," and, "I could come just listening to you... feeling you... fuck." It was filthy and it turned River on so much that she nearly began to scream. If it weren't for Harry loosening his grip on her waist and filling her mouth with his fingers, she would've brought the ceiling down.
Unable to control the waves of her orgasm, River's hips twisted and rode against Harry's face. She panted like she'd ran a marathon, sweat rolled down her temples and into her sex teased hair. Not once in her life did she swear as much as she had done while Harry buried his tongue inside of her, his lips coaxing her to the tipping point of her desire.
Harry's breathy chuckle brought her attention back to the real world, eyes now open and in direct line with his amused and content little grin. River couldn't help it when she giggled and lifted one of her arms from above her head and popped her thumb in one of his dimples. It was the most gorgeous sight to see—one she didn't get to experience often enough.
"You with me still?" he asked, gentle as he brushed away the strands of hair from her shoulder. It left a tingling sensation behind, and with how sensitive she felt from the attention between her legs, it was difficult not to shudder and lift her hips slightly.
River nodded. "Mhm."
"That's good. Because I'm not done with you yet," he grinned and leaned down to kiss her deeply.
It was impossible not to moan between his lips as she curled her arms around his neck. River pulled him down until their chest were flush against one another, her nipples rubbed against his skin. She sighed, content and needy, while she wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him closer. The feel of his hard cock against her was too much pleasure at once and she whined, unable to hold her voice in.
"You're gonna get us caught, honey," he scolded her with mischief in his eyes, all too carefree to truly be bothered by this.
"I'll be quiet," the words were breathy and rushed. She needed him so bad. "I promise. I do."
"You'll be quiet?" he tsked, his index finger pressed to her lower lip. River kept her eyes on his face, desperate for the connection, while he focused on the journey of her lips, and it positively raised her heartbeat. "Baby, that mouth of yours is going to be begging me to let you come. I would never want you to be quiet."
Exhaling a shaky breath when he finally looked at her, it was hard not to take control of the situation. River needed him right then and there but at the same time she enjoyed the games he played with her body, the guesses he made on what she'd like in a way that felt exciting. It opened up so much of her own body to her, helped her figure out what she enjoyed and what turned her on. This experience was for both of them—to connect and to learn.
For Harry to love her.
It was obvious. It nearly brought her to tears. There was a softness to every caress, and every kiss. It started out with caution and care, endless love that felt all consuming in the best way. If Harry sensed she didn't like it, he pulled back and tried something else. Everything he did was thoughtful and conscious of her, all the while extremely sexy and her body was in a constant state of euphoria.
"River, baby, are you with me?" he asked.
"Mhm," she nodded, eyes shut as she enjoyed the weight of him on top of her, the cool air as it caressed her kissed up skin.
"Look at me," he called softly. It was hard with his lips on her chest, between her breasts. Her need for him was beyond explanation. The state of her pussy might as well have been called a damn swimming pool. "Honey?" he called again, his hand on the side of her neck, his thumb on her chin and index finger behind her ear. River was forced to meet his eyes. Hazy, full of lust. "There's my girl."
"Harry..." she cried.
"I know, honey, I know," he cooed, hand caressing the curve of her waist then back up. Shivers ran down her spine when his fingers toyed with her nipple, and she hissed a little when he pushed her legs wider apart and pressed himself between them. "I'm going to go slow, alright? Tell me if it's too much."
"Please..."
Excitement rode high, nerves knotted. River never imagined when her first time would come around, or how it would feel. She didn't anticipate her body tightening up, or the amount of sweating it would bring. There were levels to the way Harry made her feel—first with his mouth and now with his cock.
It was an indescribable feeling. She didn't know it was possible to feel so whole. He filled her perfectly, if a little past comfort. Even through the thin material of the condom, she felt him as though they were skin to skin, the ridges of his cock all too nice to hold back her moans.
She pushed her chest out and dug her nails into the skin of his back. It was too much. Too much. Too much. "Oh, fuck..." she whimpered.
"Baby," he whined, his breath hot against her chest. "Fuck, I've not even moved and I'm ready to come."
"I don't mind," she panted.
"No," he shook his head, the word quick and it sounded strained. "This is about you."
And she felt like it was about her. Every thrust. Every kiss. He cared for her like she was made of glass and she enjoyed every second of it. The way he made her feel light and sexy, absolutely desired. It was otherworldly. Unexpected.
River didn't think she'd be vocal in bed. Not as much as she was with Harry, anyway. He made her moan, and scream, and he enjoyed silencing her with his fingers in her mouth. Whenever she caught his smug smirk, her stomach tightened and she squeezed around him. Her tongue was wicked around his index and middle fingers, skilled enough to make Harry lose his balance above her and become sluggish with his hips.
River's legs were jelly and the stars she started to see were making her dizzy. She'd never felt like this before. So high on a feeling she got from another person. From being connected to someone so deeply and thoroughly.
Words were not enough to express herself. Nothing felt enough to communicate what her mind, body, and soul had gone through. It was completely mind-blowing, and sure, she had nothing to compare this experience against but she knew for sure this was the best sex of her life.
The realisation was sweet.
The reminder that they were not alone in the apartment was not.
After a few knocks on the wall where the TV stand was placed, Chris's voice followed. "I take you're done for the night?" River lifted her head and stared ahead, blood rushing to her face like never before.
"Fuck off!" Harry shouted back.
"Oh my god," she whispered, absolutely mortified. She assumed the walls were soundproofed. Everywhere she went, the walls were soundproofed. Who on earth didn't have soundproofed walls?
Harry laughed beside her as he curled up to her neck, his lips light as he peppered kisses all over her skin. Shortly after, his hand warmed her stomach and his fingers started to trail upwards when she grasped his wrist.
"You didn't tell me your walls are not soundproofed."
"You didn't ask," he replied nonchalant. He sounded like he didn't care which, coming from someone who constantly worries and overthinks, was shocking. "Besides, he is just taking the piss."
"I can never show my face again," she complained, purposefully ignoring what he said. River wasn't stupid to believe Harry. Of course, his brother heard everything.
Harry grinned, ear to ear, as he leaned against his fist. He looked down at her, glowing, and kissed her nose. The action made her scrunch her nose at him, and he chuckled.
"That would devastate the entire world, baby. You can't keep this beautiful face from us," his index finger ran down the side of her face as he spoke the words, his eyes followed the pattern of his trail. When he locked his eyes on hers, he grinned again, wide and cheery.
Blood rushed to her cheeks once more. She felt so nervous it was almost unknown to her. No one made her feel this light, this happy, this free in her entire life.
"You make me happy," she told him, clutching the duvet with both hands and toes curled beneath them. She pulled the warm cover up to her nose and peered at Harry innocently. This was new. This emotionally open side of her. River never had the chance to express herself to someone like this but she decided she liked it.
"You make me happy, too," he said and brought his hand to her cheek, then his lips to hers in a soft kiss. Silence wrapped around them like a blanket, River's hand on his shoulder. Their noses touched and he pecked her lips one final time. "How are you feeling?"
She looked at him with questioning eyes and chuckled. "I just told you. I'm happy."
He smiled. "Sure. I meant after sex? Was it okay? I've, uh, I've never been someone's first time."
The thought warmed her heart. He was her first. She was his first first. Something about it was incredibly satisfying. Added to that the fact that he felt nervous made her heart melt.
River pushed herself up and pulled Harry with him. "Yes, darling," she smiled with her hands on his cheeks. His green eyes danced between hers like he looked for a better answer. River leaned in and kissed him. Pulling away just enough to look into his eyes, she said, "You were perfect. I have never felt so good in my life, and," she chuckled, "trust me, I know what I'm doing."
Harry laughed. "Good. That's—that's great, baby. I'm glad that you think I match up well against your skills."
"You exceed them, darling," she winked. "I'm not sure I'll be able to walk."
"Where the hell would you need to walk?" he asked, almost offended. "You're staying with me tonight."
"That was not planned. I have no clothes here, and I will not go to bed without my usual routine," she explained.
"You can sleep in whatever clothes I have, and will fit you," he replied instantly. He seemed serious. "Actually," he looked towards his closet. "I may have something Ellis left here when they stayed over previously. You can wear that."
"Fine."
"Fine," he grinned.
With an arched brow, she asked, "And the rest of my evening routine?"
"What is your evening routine?"
So, she listed everything. Down to the specific products she used. Every detail made her happy because evenings were her favourite. It was elaborate and luxurious, just how she loved it. The one extravagant thing she allowed herself to have because life worked her hard enough to deserve a couple of hours of peace. She couldn't tell if he was amazed or terrified by it. He sat there and started to deflate. The wave of his own thoughts and emotions seemed to drag him beneath the surface. In fact, it could've been tears that made his eyes glassy.
"Hey," she smiled, a hand to his cheek. He smiled back and put his hand on her wrist. "I'll stay."
"No," he shook his head. The smile disappeared. He pulled her hand from his face. "You don't have to stay."
"Darling—"
He got off the bed and it suddenly felt cold all-around River. Immediately, she moved on the bed and balanced on her knees.
"I have your driver's number. I'll text him to pick you up while you shower?" he offered.
River shook her head. Looked to the side and grabbed the black button down she spotted on the backrest of the bed. Likely one of his work shirts. She buttoned up a couple of holes in the middle so more of her was covered.
"I told you. I will stay."
"That was not planned, though, was it?" he asked—mocked as she got off the bed and he tugged on his boxers. River couldn't help her eyes as they took in his firm thighs, or the way the boxers tightened around his middle.
"Darling, I—"
"You don't have clothes here, or your evening routine, so perhaps it is best if you go."
There was no emotion. No love. His words hit like a cold hand to the cheek and River didn't understand. Everything was perfect until two minutes ago.
"A moment ago, you wanted me to stay," she reminded him. Harry turned away and pushed his fingers through his hair. Frustration rolled off of him and she wondered if she caused him to feel that way. "If you can tell me what changed, and we can't work it out, I will leave."
"That's the thing, though, River," he laughed, desperate. Helpless. He didn't turn to face her. Instead, he walked towards his window. "We can't work it out."
Confused, she asked, "This is not about my evening routine anymore, is it?" Harry didn't respond. River was inclined to take it as confirmation. "I am not a mind reader, Harry. Tell me what you are thinking."
Two could play this game. River wasn't a victim in this. If Harry wanted to be one, that wasn't up to her. The last thing he could do for her was explain what changed because she needed to know. She deserved to know.
"I am thinking that you should go home. I have work tomorrow. I'm sure you have your own thing," he flicked his hand out like it didn't matter what he said, or what she would do the following day. "You obviously need your evening routine to prepare and whatnot, and I'd like to get some sleep."
The rejection stung. It felt like an icicle through the heart. It froze the blood in her veins. Cold sweat lined her skin. The shirt she wore became uncomfortable because it was the closest connection she had to Harry in that moment.
Tears prickled in the inner corners of her eyes. Emotions bubbled up her throat but she kept them at bay until they formed into a knot and she couldn't swallow anymore.
Rejection turned to embarrassment soon enough. Wearing nothing but his shirt was vulnerable enough, and these hurt feelings made it terribly worse. Even though she swallowed her tears, they blurred her vision as she reached for her jeans and pulled them up, swapped his shirt for her turtleneck. Between sniffle one and sniffle two, she picked up her thong, socks, and bra, then grabbed her phone and bolted from his bedroom.
She grabbed her bag and shoved in her underwear. Putting on the boots was difficult but she managed, and when she got everything that belonged to her, she left the apartment without a word.
It was silent everywhere except her head as she waited for the lift. Anthony received her message and promised he was three minutes away.
As much as River wished for Harry to make a movie gesture and hurry after her, she was glad he made no harsh decisions. Obviously, there was a lot on his mind. Difficult matters if he pushed her to leave after what she thought to be the perfect evening. Like she told him, she couldn't see inside his head and until he opened up completely, she wouldn't know what truly happened.
Staying would've worsened the situation.
He told her his wishes and she could only respect them. If his cold exterior and lack of contact was any indication, Harry needed to be alone more than to be with River. It was a tough, bitter pill to swallow but one she was fine to force down for his sake.
When Anthony arrived, she got in the car without a word, and the chauffer knew better than to ask.
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Happy Friday!
Just so you are aware - I can't be held accountable for what happened in this chapter. I was writing, and then words were painting themselves onto the word document, and before I knew it, River was out the door.
I feel like we needed some insanity though, they were too happy together.
Hopefully they can work it out lol.
I shall see you next week :)
Love, B xx