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◢◤◢◤◢◤ Circuit 28 ◢◤◢◤◢◤
"The other day, I stripped and asked him what he thought about my new lingerie." Exclaimed the girl in all Chanel vintage tweed matching set. The blanket we'd use to separate us from the grass? An Hermès cashmere classic she'd casually whip out of her micro Birkin.
"Go on..." Jade urges, her ears perked up. I silently giggled at that. We were easily entertained.
Skye huffs out through the strands of hair cascading over her eyes. She's telling us a story that happened the other night when Kade supposedly came over to her house to hang out with her in her bedroom and she tried to seduce him.
"How did he react?" I asked, finding amusement in my friend's little crisis.
"He simply shrugged and said, 'It's your color.' Then he went back to playing that freaking video game. Like what guy passes on the opportunity?!" The frustration in her tone is infallible.
I hold back a snort of amusement at her confession, imagining a blank-faced Kade in my head shrugging in front of a barely-clothed Skye.
"Geez, I wish I had that problem," Jade comments as she applies a second layer of mascara on her already long lashes.
"Aww, Skye, maybe he was just being a gentleman." I tried to come up with a logical reason behind her boyfriend's actions. He's oblivious as a boulder in the middle of a river.
It hasn't been that long since Kade and I got to know each other, but I could say he was the closest to me as he was the first to introduce me to the rest of the group.
The boy was like a hot chocolate in a blizzard. So full of warmth, I'd soon mistake him for a Golden Retriever.
"That's not what I wanted though..."
"What? Kade being a gentleman?" Jade laughed incredulously, striking my arm in the process. "Who in their right mind wouldn't want someone like that?"
"Me!" Skye huffs out and tucks a hair behind her Chanel headband. "I wanted to get laid."
"You and that word don't go together, Skye," Jade says. "Getting laid sounds so..."
"Vulgar?" I said, finishing her sentence. "I agree. Although sex is sex to me. It is your first time, right?"
Skye nodded, gracefully crossing her legs. She has her usual Chanel stocking to match with her skirt and her neck is decorated with stunning pearls. She looks like she's part of the royal family or something.
"Well..." I clicked my tongue. "I think Kade wants to make the moment special for the both of you. It's clear that you're both serious with each other, but there's no need to rush. Things are better when they're unplanned."
They both hum in agreement until my last sentence, Jade chimes. "That sounds like a recipe for disaster," Jade cringed. "Definitely don't do anything unplanned. Learn from my mistakes from last summer and use protection!"
"Okay, yeah, don't do that..." I agreed when the thought dawned on me. "What happened last summer?"
"She had a pregnancy scare after hooking up with a boy from another school," uttered Skye. "She didn't get her period for like... three weeks."
I gasped, "Shit. That is scary..."
"Yeah, that's why I'm careful now."
"Girl, I know I didn't just see you with that guy from the Basketball team," Skye revealed as Jade chokes on her spit.
"That was nothing!" She exclaims, suddenly looking serious. "He's in one of my classes. He just helps me with work."
I curled in my spot, suddenly feeling flustered from the topic. "Yeah... I know where that goes."
Skye turns to me. "You okay?"
I brought my eyes up to her, "Yeah, I'm fine. Go back to what you were saying."
"Then I always need to be ready," Skye stressed as Jade squeezed her shoulder.
"Relax, Skye... We have all summer and we're graduating soon."
"Can you believe it? It was a limited edition La Perla!"
Oh, to relate.
"So, you're mad because he didn't want to have sex with you?" Jade questions.
"No. Because it seems like he doesn't want to do it with me."
"Isn't that the same thing, though?" I let my curiosity win. "What if he didn't want to do it at your parent's house?"
"But no one was home! That could have been the perfect timing."
Jade shakes her shoulders, "Have you brought up the conversation with him? Maybe he's not getting the hint. No offense, Kade's a little... slow."
"Jade!" Skye glares at her in offense. "That's my boyfriend you're talking about. Watch it."
"Okay, okay, geez. It wasn't like I'm making shit up. Even Ola agrees, right?" Jade snaps her head in my direction.
I slowly bring my book back up. "No comment."
"Hey!" Skye scolds. "You're supposed to be on my side."
"I am not taking anyone's side." I defended all too quickly. "But back to your dilemma. What do you plan to do now?"
"I don't know anymore. I've tried so many times and never once succeeded." A deep crease forms around the smooth skin around her mouth. "He won't do anything. It almost feels odd that he doesn't want to be intimate in this day and age. I mean, he's a boy and I'm a girl who has needs."
She's right. But the fact that he didn't make a move surprises me.
Jade sighs, shaking his head. "I know the feeling. I tried to hit on Finn Clarke yesterday and he looked at me like I had three heads."
"That's probably because Finn Clarke is gay and has a boyfriend," I retorted. I've met the student in one of my classes and I've seen him walk with his boyfriend once or twice.
Both Skye and Jade groan in misery, leaning against each other.
"Love is so hard," Skye whimpers.
"Good grief," I mumbled under my breath.
Suddenly, Jade lifts her hand up. "But, never fear! I have a plan!" She reveals a bottle with an old-fashioned cork stopper full of a fuchsia liquid.
"Oh no," I grimaced, unable to keep a side-eye from rolling. "The hell's that?" Skye looks just as entranced as I am.
Feeding my curiosity, Jade shows off the mysterious liquid like it's a new toy, turning it around to display how it glows in the sunlight. "This is a potion, from that witchy store on Watts. It's going to help you seduce Kade."
"What - how did you even find yourself in Watts?"
I cannot hide my reaction to the ridiculous item in her hold as her eyes dart with panic behind me. "Jade, you cannot be serious about this."
"I — oh. Hey boys." Jade screeches as she immediately clasped her hands behind her with a tight-lipped smile. "Was wondering where you guys went. I missed you!"
My shoulders automatically freeze up when I hear Theo's honey-like voice behind me. "We got pizza for lunch."
"And pineapple for me?" Skye flutters her lashes at her boyfriend who's already making his way beside her on the blanket with a large box in one hand. "Also got you your pink drink, baby."
"That's soooo sweet, it's making me sick." Jade feigns disgust and tugs a sanitary wipe from her purse before grabbing herself a slice of cheese-flavored Pizza.
"I didn't know which one you'd like, so I got you two other kinds of flavor." Theo sits to my side, away from everyone else before whispering to my line of hearing.
He makes sure I don't feel left out just when I thought he was going to disregard me. It makes me feel a variety of emotions.
Is this how it feels to be thought about by someone? I admit that I am easily swayed and have no self-restraint, but I don't care.
"Thanks," I genuinely break out into a smile, my textbook long gone and instead replaced with my wallet. I didn't like owing people. "How much was it?"
"Don't worry about it. It's my treat."
I gleamed, going for the classic Pepperoni and not wasting another minute before gobbling it down to the crust. Wiping the side of my mouth, I asked. "Something good happen today?"
"No," he replies. "I just thought Pizza would be fitting for today's weather."
"Interesting," I enthused, already halfway through my second slice. It's not my fault that the slices are so thin and oily, but when you're hungry, you don't have time to criticize your food.
"I met with Brown," Theo suddenly mentioned.
My ears perked up as I paused from chewing another bite, my cheeks full and unappealing. "For what?" I couldn't help but be concerned. I wasn't sure if my test results would be enough to prove to him that I was deserving of a diploma.
All this headache and stress for a piece of paper I won't even look at for the rest of my life. A scrap of paper that will soon be dusty, like our family photos in the attic.
"It went well," is all Theo says. "You're passing your classes."
It was then that I felt myself finally breathing normally. "Are you fucking with me?"
"N-no?"
"Thank goodness," I sighed heavily. It was true, though, this is the most work I've done for my studies, staying up all night reading and going over notes Theo simplified for me until my eyes closed on their own.
"I thought all my efforts would get me nowhere. The difficult part is studying. I'm slow in comparison to most people, and memorizing is difficult for me. I have you to thank."
"You just need to concentrate, be consistent, and not let anything else occupy your mind." His words are straightforward, with not an ounce of malice, but I pick them apart as I always do. It's my least-liked trait; putting definition to anything.
"Oh, you don't want to know."
Theo turns aside and says nothing else. My smile fades gradually. He's back to his brisk demeanor, which is enough to tell someone he's not in the best of spirits, and I know it's because of me.
And yet as I speak, I'm breaking my own fucking heart.
All I ever wanted was to keep him away from a girl who'd repeatedly hurt him. His peace. And the rest would come with time. If he'd give me a chance.
But I'm nervous now, too. And are a little distraught. So whatever foolishness I was letting myself indulge in with him is promptly abandoned. I'm not going to mess things up any further. By his own words, I can't possibly be feeling anything as heavy as love - and the friendship I have with him means more to me than, well, anything.
"We're okay, right?" I ask after a while a little desperate for things to feel normal again.
Then again, what is 'normal' between us? Teasing and using each other for pleasure? Friends don't touch each other the way we do. Don't speak to each other the way we do behind closed doors. Don't think of each other the way we— I do.
I manage to smile before grabbing the half-empty pizza box and tossing it into the nearest trash can. I reach for his hand aimlessly, and to my surprise, Theo lets me drag him up with a grunt.
"We're fine, Ola."
Are we?
His response is supposed to ease me, but it adds to the weight in my chest, and I'm about to spew out my insides. "Are we still on for later?" I stood in front of him, smoothening my skirt in front as he sat innocently.
"Hm?"
My gaze drilled into his biceps, stretching the fabric of his shirt sleeves, and my mouth became dry as the boy faltered and his eyes swiftly fell to his lap.
"To study at the library," I tell him. "I've got that exam I told you about last week."
"Oh, yeah. We're still on."
Sometimes you just want something so badly that you have to lie about it just to hold it on your tongue for long.
To taste how bitter the burn feels.
It was like filling your lungs with smoke and then exhaling it through your nose for the first time. Unexpected and odd. It's something your body resists at first before the nicotine settles and you're somewhat stupefied, and you reason it's just a phase, something you'll put down once the thrill has worn off.
For the longest time, you would not have the first poison, and by the time you realize how far you've caved in, you're already in need of a smoke just to get through the day. The addiction happens right before your eyes and you don't even realize it's happening.
That's how I felt now.
My skull felt like it was going to fall off any minute by cramming outdated lectures into the recesses of my mind. An hour of nothing but stress and tiredness. I nearly fainted remembering those math and chemistry calculations.
It was even more difficult not being able to strike up a regular conversation with Theo, and I knew I had messed everything up by showing up to campus high as fuck after Russell had let me hit his pen in his car on the way to school earlier that morning.
The good thing about it was being able to persuade him to give me a ride to school from now on.
I can't say if I regret it because, at that time, it really did feel like I was on cloud nine and nothing could ever bring me down.
Sneaking in and out of the bathrooms or hiding behind walls for a single hit that I know will never satisfy me.
It turns out that I wasn't the bad influence in the friend group.
Revision after revision.
At one point, I considered dropping out and working somewhere that didn't require my brain. Oh, to have a job like that and still get paid well. The only side hustles I could think of were some dubious activities that would almost certainly land me in jail.
"Fuck. I can't do it anymore," I exhale through my nose and drop my pencil, watching as it rolls on the wooden table. "It's not working for me. Nothing is getting into my brain."
Theo abruptly stopped writing on his own notes while trying to avoid my droopy eyes.
"It shouldn't be that difficult, but I can see you haven't been trying the problems I gave you on your own."
"It's too much for one day," I sighed, my drooping lids lowering to his mouth. We're not in the best place right now, but I can't stop myself. My mind flashes back to his car. I go to bed these days, thinking about him, his hair, his soft hands, and that naive smile I rarely see, and the way he talks like he owns the dictionary, and the way he gets all moany and - fuck.
I am corrupted. In every way. Theo has wreaked my servers with the bare minimum, much like a fuckin' virus. And I wouldn't mind if he did it again. Without a doubt.
I'm thinking about it again now. Squeeze my thighs together under the table, 'cause I'm recalling how he kissed my skin with warning inscribed on it. How effortlessly he'd wrapped his lips around my nipples as if it wasn't his first time. Oh, God. I shouldn't.
With a languid smile, I picked up my pencil for the second time and dismissed my intrusive thoughts.
"You are one tough teacher," I mumbled, my eyes ever so gently raking his beautiful features. "Are you always like this to your students?"
"No. But you are the only one I've met who has no desire to learn."
His sarcasm makes me smile.
My head was throbbing, and the need to lay down and rest for a bit until I felt normal again grew stronger by the minute. Meanwhile, I was oblivious to the latter's mounting alarm.
"Wow," I blew out a breath, keeping myself awake despite the heaviness of my eyelids. "I think that's the most accurate description you have of me. I'm impressed."
"Then you must be easily impressed."
I gave him a nauseating smile. "My standards are quite high, you wouldn't believe it."
"I bet." It's like a slap in the face when he says it in such a deep intonation.
What a silly thing to tell me when I've never been so sure of anything in my life. The very one I'm certain about.
I shook my head, trying not to be overly sensitive. Nobody likes sensitive people. No one.
Theo realizes I am no longer interested in the topic and shifts in his seat.
"Are you feeling sick?" His stare follows my movements, but his tone conveys pure coldness.
I laughed, not because I found it silly, but because I was relieved he simply cared enough to ask. "Not in the way you think."
"Then, why can't you focus?"
"I was just... thinking," I began softly, "I'm a visual learner."
"You are?" He inquired, genuinely interested. I responded with a nod before he continued, "If that's the case, would it be better for you to learn while seeing it in person or with a demonstration? I know lab experiments can be frustrating for some."
As I nipped at my bottom lip, an idea formed in my head. "You don't mind?"
"I help Thea with her homework."
Great, he just compared me to his five-year-old sister, which I don't find offensive, but it doesn't make me feel any smarter.
"Maybe a change of setting would do me good," I blurted to which he gave another thought.
Theo looks me over. "I can ask Brown if we can use the lab once in a while, and then we'll see where things go from there."
"Great." After a full day of listening to my teachers talk about the approaching tests that would finally determine if we were qualified for college, my energy slowly returned.
I pushed myself from the uncomfortable chair and stuffed my pencils, extra vivid rainbow highlighters, and books inside my bag. "I'm starving. Would you like to go get some food?" I smiled, hoping he would take up my offer. If not, then humiliation awaits me. "My treat this time."
He glances down at the watch around his wrist. "I don't know... I have practice at five."
That gives us two hours of free time. That's enough time for me to apologize and seek forgiveness for my stupidity.
"We'll be back before then."
Theo sparks my hope when he gathers his things and tells me to lead the way.
"I thought we were only getting food? Why are we thirty minutes away from Campus?" Theo asked as soon as we pulled aside to the road along rows of cars.
"Don't be dramatic. It didn't take that long. Maybe fifteen minutes?"
"If you count the flow of traffic—"
"Okay, okay. You win."
There were a few food carts in the distance, and to the right, kilometers of sand stretched out to the horizon, almost like scenery from a movie. I'm starting to understand why California receives so much attention from tourists.
It is truly a beautiful place.
"We won't make it back on time. Why did we come here?" Theo says as I get out of my seat, unconcerned with the absence of my Oxfords, which were too painful on my chunky toes.
"Oh, we will. Trust me."
"Nothing good has ever come out of me trusting you, Ola."
I sucked in a breath. Not because he was wrong, but because he was right.
"That's not nice ."
"Sorry, but I'm just being truthful."
"Okay, yeah. Fair enough." I grimaced at his words. "You have every right to doubt me, but know that I won't go back on my words this time."
Glancing over his shoulder, Theo silently looks me up and down. I never know what goes through his mind.
"Come on, we'll be right back." I cracked a grin, before I pushed off the window, showing off my full height. "You'll thank me later."
It wasn't until I flicked out my pinky and offered to interlock it with his that he agreed to turn off the engine and finally join me.
Theo winced as his eyes opened against the rays of sunlight and looked over at me.
I hurried ahead of him, too enthusiastic for my own good, and when I turned back, he looked like a golden retriever with how the sunlight deposited shadows on his face and the fringe on top of his head, which I could only envision how silky it must be through my fingers.
"I found this place a while back," I said, pausing in my steps so he could catch up. It didn't take long because he had god-like legs.
"I've never seen this place in Sierra Madre," said Theo.
The stunning neighborhood market above Pasadena, which serves a basic American menu fit for a cottage-size restaurant, is a little far out. You can either get there by taking a long climb up hilly streets, riding a rusty bike, or taking the risk of maneuvering through narrow lanes.
I hate those bikes almost as much as I despise hills, which is a shame because I know they're distinctive. Perhaps by the time I realize how fortunate I am, I will have developed an appreciation for nature.
There aren't many hills in Chicago, it's not every day that you wake up with soaring mountains in your backyard, an ocean down the street, and snow in another city.
I would rather choose to spend my time on the Pacific Coast, down by the highway in Malibu, and soak in the sun all day.
"Hmm... Which street was it-" I murmured, "so left, turn right going all the way up Woodland, and then it should be to the left."
I had no clue where those streets were or how long it was going to take us but judging by the way that Theo's shoulders slacked and his eyes widened, I knew it was going to be long.
"Seven. Seven miles?" Theo mumbled slowly.
"Seven more steps, baby boy." I laughed softly. The sun had already battered against our skin two hours after midday, and unlike me, who intended to leave my bags in the car, Theo had insisted on carrying his with him. It was his child. I don't recall ever seeing him without his Doc messenger bag.
"Just think of this as your warm-up."
Sweating, unflattering, and at an impasse.
Our squabbles had subsided since talking required too much energy in the stifling heat.
The only plus side was the way Theo looked as he walked in front of me on the street while I remained on the sidewalk. Every time he took a step forward, the tightness of his muscles would constrict against those dark trousers and distract me.
We were approaching the neckline, and the moisture on the back of his skin made him appear much sexier, even edible.
I couldn't help but glance at the rose color burning his cheeks and the slight shudder on his lips. Almost immediately, I am reminded of how I made him look exactly like that in his car.
Fuck.
Not right now.
I gazed down at the grass peeking out the sidewalk, trying to ignore the heat that washed over me, this time not from the sun.
Theo groaned in front of me as a leaf fell from one of the trees and landed on top of his head. He turned to face me after his attention was drawn to my loud panting.
"How much longer?"
Taking another step up the slope was becoming increasingly difficult for me, but I persisted knowing it would be worth the trip. The seven-minute trip would be worthwhile.
"Are you sure you're an athlete?"
I tore my gaze away from my phone and slid it in the secret pocket of my skirt.
"You can do it, Theo. I know you can." I encouraged despite the lack of air in my lungs.
Moving behind him, I pulled my hair in a tangled ponytail and caught him off guard as I planted my hands on his lower back and pushed with all my strength.
Theo shrieks in disbelief. "Are you sure this is the correct address-"
"There!" I squeak as soon as the sign catches my eye, and I eventually get him to walk faster.
By the time we're up the hill, I'm starving. Have been on my feet for so long that it feels like they might fall off.
Theo sighs right next to me, contemplating his life as he furrows his brows. "Did we have to leave my car on the side of the road?" He doesn't sound too happy but still manages to force a nervous smile. "There's parking up there."
"Saved you from having to parallel park," I chuckled.
Theo feigns offense. "I've been driving since I was sixteen. I'm great behind the wheel."
"Oh, I don't doubt that." I arched my brows, knowing full well that an opportunity like this - would not be missed. "Should we go on a drive one of these days, then?"
"Not sure if you'd be able to catch up."
I agree because I know that no matter how much better I am, I will only let him win either way. It isn't about winning and proving that I am better, but the fact that he is willing to spend time with me, is more than enough.
Theo's presence will make it so much better. He has a knack for relieving my tensions.
Everything is made tolerable by him.
Deciding to bring some reassurance to his mind, I pull his hand towards me on the sidewalk and he nearly stumbles. "Okay, I know it seems sketchy, but trust me," I promise as we walk past a Victorian-themed housing. "The neighborhood is questionable, yes, but I swear it's got the best restaurant."
Theo glanced at me with an unknown emotion in his eyes, and the proximity of our faces and combined entrapped breaths made me feel dizzy. I was fully and utterly smitten with this boy, and I felt there was no way out but to let it swallow me.
I simply prayed he'd look at me and feel the same way, but I knew that wasn't going to happen because his eyes didn't sparkle like they do in films and novels. Theo doesn't look at me as if I've placed the stars in his sky.
I can't blame him.
We hadn't been staring at each other for long enough to have that effect on each other, yet.
I moistened my lips and stood on my toes to brush his hair away from sticking to the sheen of sweat on his forehead.
"You have me," I nudge his side with my elbow. "Needn't worry when Ola is here. They'll have to get through me before that pretty face gets a single scratch."
Theo only blinks at my arrogance.
"Look!" I exclaim, pointing to a table for two, outside with the garden surrounding it. "Let's sit there, please. I want to take photos for my scrapbook."
"You have a scrapbook?" He appears astonished to find that about me, but in reality, I simply prefer the way things were back then in terms of fashion, music and a simpler way of life. I like keeping my life hidden because I would rather write about it in my journals so I wouldn't ever forget it.
"You like to write?"
"About myself, yes."
"I didn't know," Theo replied.
I shrugged, finding it somewhat humiliating to share this part of myself. "I have the worst penmanship known to humanity that I would rather keep hidden."
It was true.
Back in middle school, my teachers had us correct our own papers so she wouldn't have to go through the stress of reading jumbled letters. The thought of having my diary stolen never occurred to me because no one would genuinely read words written by a five-year old.
And so we set off on our afternoon. Just as before, Theo follows my lead. He blindly trusts me. Lets me drag him into a place that makes you question how it's still in business - and that's how you know it's good.
"Welcome!" Once the bell signals our arrival, we are greeted by two women behind the counter. The first has short bob hair, while the second has a wolf cut. "What can I get for you?"
"Not sure what I want," I say, checking over the menu in front. My eyes flicker up to Theo, a smile resting on my glossy lips. "Can you give us a minute?"
"Sure, let me know when you're ready." The woman goes back to her previous task.
I felt relieved seeing him with the same reaction I had when I first came in and didn't think much of the small shop.
This was my second time here and it still blows my mind how cozy, yet stunning this place is.
From the outside, it looked like a shabby little café with a tiny little birdhouse, plants, and a bunch of brochures stuck to a pinboard just beside the crimson, wooden door. To the side, is a chair for two surrounded by more plants and a little American flag sticking up like a sore thumb.
The inside is what makes it so special. There are seats and tables to one side of the wall and a diner-style bar in the middle of the room for those who come alone.
The place is filled with pondered lights from last Christmas that were never taken down. The ceilings aren't that high either and it's got wood planks on it.
The compact area where the meals are prepared and cooked has only two stoves, a rack of seasonings above it, and three chalkboard menus with faded writings. There are a handful of little knick knacks exhibited on top of shelves that are too archaic for me to name and call aesthetic, but what strikes me the most is that they're being sold.
For most locals, this store functions as an all-in-one-stop shop.
None of the items on the menu are more than $7, I've never been more excited about splurging on my cravings.
When I think of it, it reminds me of our kitchen back home. Perhaps that's why I love it the way it is. Makes me feel at home. Makes me feel like I belong in a city that is so fast-paced.
"Pick whatever you want on the menu." I prodded my chin proudly. "Think of it as my way of thanking you for coming and helping me pass my exams."
He doesn't even bother to look at the menu before he replies. "I... I'm not sure what to get. I've never been here before. I'll take whatever you have."
I hid my amusement and stood closer to him enough to where I could feel his warmth radiating off his body.
"It's a shame I'm not on the menu."
My insinuation causes Theo's face to rapidly heat up. He should expect it at least once or twice a day now. If not, there must be something wrong without all the sexual jokes.
The panic in Theo's eyes as he saw people slowly flooding inside made it even more exhilarating. I press my nose into his shoulder, becoming calmer as I inhale his scent.
Then my hands fall to the curve of his waist. I'd always been one to show up where I wasn't wanted just to fuck with him a little.
"You're sweating," I whispered.
"I... It's hot in here."
"Oh, no." Eyes glinting, I lean in and drive my hips against him, pinning him to the counter as a grunt leaves his pretty lips. "Then how do you explain that?"
Hissing an exhale, he leans back and his feather-light thumb glides along my arm on his bicep, sending shivers through my spine.
"Filthy, baby."
I look down at our bodies touching and nibble on my lip, a deep breath departing from my very soul as if my bones are creaking beneath my skin.
"You like this, don't you?" I whispered in his ear, making sure no one saw how my hand was deeply buried in his pocket, then squeezed once I knew he wasn't going to stop me.
"You're so weak for me, aren't you?" I mused slowly, my tone dropping. "But you're too good for someone like me."
"That's not-"
Going on my tipped toes, I leisurely dropped my hands from his waist before bringing my lips to where his spinal cord began. "It's okay, though, I like working hard for something I really... really want."
I hastily drew away from Theo before he could say anything, just in time for the woman to turn around with an infectious smile that made me emulate her despite the heavy feeling in the pit of my stomach.
"Have you both decided on what you want?"
"I have."
If you can't have it, ruin it.
Hi, I'm back! Sorry for the long wait.
I have exams all week and didn't have too much free time to write, so I made sure this chapter was longer. This was almost 6k, I had to split it as it already reached 10k words.
Also, I don't know if anyone has noticed but I write in both past & present tenses and it might be annoying for some but I just can't help myself. I tend to just go with whatever I feel fits. It's totally understandable if anyone finds it annoying, but yeah I just wanted to point it out before someone in the comments come for me. 🥲
Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well. Thank you, again!
~vee