I stare at myself in the mirror,it reminds of my first wedding with Dante.
I wasn't happy, I missed my bio mom that day.
But today is different, although I wasn't sad,I wasn't happy either.
My dress is simple plain white dress and it off-the-shoulders with tiny strap bands.
I wore the necklace my mom wore on her wedding with my dad for good luck.
Hair and makeup was natural.
It wasn't any big flashy wedding, just a simple wedding by the lake side.
Only family and friends are attending and a few of my employees at Marielle.
Chanel and Dixie were my only bride's maid. Chanel was the maid of honor.
I didn't have many close friends.
"You look amazing" Chanel whispers from beside me.
"Thank you"I tell her still staring at my reflection.
"Do you want to do this? Are you sure?"she asks worriedly
"Yes. He moved on. He couldn't fight for me. It was a losing game, we were toxic for each other and I now realized that" I tell her almost on tears and she sighs and hugs me from behind.
"I hope you are happy with Felix. But you need to tell him the truth about the affair and about the baby too." She says
"I know and I will but after the marriage,then he can't leave me"I tell her
"Blaire sweety. You need to tell him now"I heard my say from the door.
"He needs to know the about the baby"mom says
"We don't even who the baby is for. It might be his so why the pressure. I will tell him after. Don't worry I'll tell him"I sigh and fixed my veil.
"I hope you know what's best "mom says but was suddenly interrupted by someone.
I gasp and turn to see Felix standing there with bloodshot eyes and disheveled hair. He looks like an addict who has been deprived of his drug.
"I hope she knows what's best because I don't know"he hisses angrily.
I gulped and walked to calmly,
"Felix , baby,what is wrong?"I asked worriedly and touched his face but he brushed it off.
Okay! He is mad.
"What the fuck is this!"he yells and throws the new papers at me.
I picked it up and it was pictures of Dante and I. We were coming out of the hotel and some we were kissing.
I swallowed hard and looked at the man I hurt so much.
My hands are shaking and my heart is beating rapidly.
"Felix, I can explain. It is not what you think" I tell him nervously
"Classic answer. Always I can explain! You were cheating on me when I was busily fighting for your love. I tried so hard to make you fall in love with me but all I get was this. The woman I love cheating on me with his ex psycho husband who used abuse her!"he yells and my mom gasp.
Chanel already knew tho.
"What.. what is he talking about Blaire"mom asks and I glare at Felix.
"Oh you didn't tell her. Well Mrs. Anderson, your daughter's lover used abuse her everyday and almost killed her"he blabs to my mom.
"Is it true baby" mom cries and I decide to ignore her.
"You know he didn't mean it. He was in a bad place at the time"I defend him as usual.
"You've got to be kidding me. You are freaking defending him,why am I not surprised. You always do! You disgust me"he spits
"I can explain Felix. Please listen to me. We can work this through" I plead.
"Explain what? How you ended up in bed or how is dick slide into you. You were fucking both of us at the same time. You are a whore. A slut!"he yells and I glare at him.
I won't yell because he is hurt .
"Look, I ended things with him,I chose you Felix. Please....."I was cutt of by him again
"When...when was the last time! When"he hits his hand again the door and stepped back in fear.
"L..last month. But babe,it doesn't matter because I am with you now. I want to be with you and our little child"I say placing my hands on my abdomen.
I know it is right to use the baby but I had no option.
"What,you mean the baby you don't know who it belongs to. So you had a paternity test done"he let out a dry humourless chuckle.
How did he find out!
"Ho...how did you..."I stutter but was cut off again when he pulled a white envelope from his pocket and handed it over to me.
"This arrived in the mail this morning. I thought it was your ultra sound appointment so I opened it not knowing it was a paternity test"he says and tears run down his eyes.
"Open it and see for yourself"he whispers.
I slowly opened it with a shaky hands and took the paper out.
I eyes wandered over the paper with a thumbing heart.
I looked at him with tears of mine own matching hos tear stained face.
"I'm sorry Felix. I am so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen" I cry
"Don't tell me you are sorry when you aren't. I had hope for us,a perfect future for us with our baby and Ireal and now everything is ruin because you were selfish and couldn't keep your legs closed"he cries harder
"Please Felix we can work this through. It doesn't matter who the father is,we can still be together and raise this baby. You are still it's father",I plead through my tears.
"Are you hearing yourself right now! I just want to know why you did it? Why? Just why?"he says sadly.
Why?
Why did I even do it?
I myself don't know the answer.
"Because he was there and I was still in love with him. But that is over now, let's forget about everything and get married. We can be happy Felix, I need you"I cry getting down on my knees in my dress.
He glares at me on the floor,combs through his hair.
"Okay. I'll walk out of here to that aisle and wait for you if you answer with honesty" he says and I nod eagerly.
"Anything.. I'll do anything "I say desperately.
"Do you love me? Do you see yourself loving me?" He asks and I stare at him dumbfounded.
"I.. I'll learn... I'll...I...don't" I stutter not knowing how to answer him.
"It is a yes or no question, Blaire"he snaps
"No...I am sorry Felix but we can still work..."he cut me off with a dry chuckle
"I have done nothing but love you but I guess it was make. You hurt me so badly Blaire,you broke my heart and I don't think I'll ever forgive you. The wedding is off,I don't want to see you ever again. I loathe you" his spat and walked out the room.
"Felix please. I am sorry"I yell after but he was gone.
I feel two pairs of arms around me as I sob into my palms on the floor.
I lost everything.
Blaire's dress