I sat on the couch straddling Noah with my face nestled into his neck as he lightly drew patterns on my back with his fingers. We hadn't spoken much since our make out session in the bathroom which was fine with me. I was completely content to sit silently wrapped up in his arms. His touch gave me a great amount of comfort that I hadn't felt in a long time and I assumed that he probably felt the same way I did.
"We need to talk about something that happened..." I finally say with a sigh before I push back so that I am able to see his face. He is wearing lazy expression, "What's up?"
I reached back and grabbed a hold of his hands pulling them away from me so that I could focus. This action seemed to make him clear his mind a bit. I held his hands in mine as I spoke focusing my attention on my fingers that were lightly caressing his skin, "Something happened while you were—locked up. Something bad..." I peer up at him from under my lashes to assess his demeanor. He looked down at me with furrowed brows, "What happened?"
I nibbled on my lip for a second trying to find the right words to say what I needed to say, "Gretchen is dead..." I say softly. I feel his body tense up against mine and I grip his hands tighter as if to tell him I am here for him. He relaxes slightly, "How?" His voice sounds gravely.
I let out a breath, "Someone killed her and left her in my bedroom"
A deep growl rumbles out of his chest and I focus my attention his eyes which have grown dark. I expected that he would react this way, considering he's the alpha and his job to protect all the members of his pact. I could see the regret, anger and guilt in his eyes and I wanted nothing more than to take it all away. His eyes scanned over me in a familiar seriousness, "There is more isn't there?" he practically growls. I nod my head not trusting my voice at the moment. He maneuvers us around so that I am no longer sitting on him and he is standing in front of the couch with his back to me.
I feel a coldness seeping through me and I know that the moment that we shared is long behind us now. I try to ignore the pang of hurt as I stare at Noah's back, "Delilah is missing and whoever killed Gretchen left a message. Dane and Ryder have been searching the entire territory for any signs of Delilah but nothing has turned up yet."
His body grows more tense and he paces forward before he releases an angry snarl with a hard punch to the wall. I cringe back at the sight and even though I have the desire to comfort him I know he wouldn't appreciate that right now so I remain seated on the couch watching him. He takes in a deep breath before turning to face me, "What was the message?"
There is a pregnant pause as I stare into his eyes, "Blood moon." I answer. His face forces itself into an angry scowl and his hand clench into fists at his side, "Damn it! Damn it all to hell!" He growls loudly in frustration.
I push myself up off the couch and come to stand near him, "Noah, I understand that—" He turns to me with a dark gaze, "No you don't understand anything Scarlett." His words feel like knives in my chest and I take a step back from him with a bit of shock, "What?" I whisper softly.
"You were sheltered your entire life. You have no idea what the real world is like..." He runs his hand through his hair in frustration, "You think that being rejected is the worse thing that can happen to you?! Even after your mate rejected you he took care of you Scarlett. Everyone gave you and has give you everything you've needed, you've never had to fight for anything in your life. So do me a favor and don't stand there and tell me that you understand..."
I stared at him in complete shock by his hurtful words. I bit into my lip to keep myself from crying. My anger bubbled inside of me, "You know what, you're an ass." I say my voice cracking slightly with my hidden emotions.
"If that's what I need to be to get through to you than so be it." He says coldly.
I feel the sudden urge to hit him but instead I clench my hand tightly at my sides, "I am sorry that you're hurting but that is not my fault. This problem was here long before I arrived. I'm only trying to support you but you're pushing me away every time I attempt to understand you." I growl at him and he stares down at me with his dark tempest eyes.
"Someone is dead and I'm sorry about that. I wish that I could absolve you of that pain but I can't but if you just let me in a little maybe I can help you. Aren't you tired of pushing everyone away? Of all the secrets that you keep?" I ask with a softer voice no longer holding to my anger.
I could see the emotions in his eyes as he struggled with everything but eventually the cold expression that I had grown accustomed took over and I knew that he wasn't going to accept anything I had to offer. A hurt ran through me so strong that I wasn't sure how I continued to stay standing.
"It's safer this way for everyone Scarlett. It was a mistake for me to think that I could have a normal mate relationship. As long as my brother is alive everyone I care about will be in danger." He says emotionless. I stared at him numbly, "So you're rejecting me than?"
"No." He says sternly.
My brow furrows, "Than what are you saying?"
"We can't be together no matter how much I wish it. Not while my brother lives. He will do everything in his power to destroy me and I can't risk losing you Scarlett." He says softly losing, becoming vulnerable for a moment.
I take a step forward and grab his onto his hand, "I'm not some delicate flower that needs protecting Noah. I want to help you. I want to fight along side of as a mate should. You and this pack are the most important things to me now. Let me help you, please." I never thought I would be pleading with Noah to let me help, if someone had told me that this is where I would be weeks ago I would have laughed in their face.
He reaches up with is free hand and cups my cheek, "I know you're strong mate but I have to know you are safe or else I won't be able to do what I need too." And I can tell there is no changing his mind at this point, whatever he's decided to do will be.
I swallow the lump in my throat, "So what do you want from me than?"
"Nothing much, other than for you to listen me for once." He lightly strokes my cheek with his thumb. A part of me wants to slap his hand away because I am hurting but another part of me wants him to never let go because I'm afraid he's going to disappear.
I nod my head, "I'll do whatever you ask me to do—you are my Alpha after all." I say and I can tell that my words sting him slightly but he doesn't say anything about it.
"I'm going to send you to stay with Alpha Harvey and Luna Rose until I handle all of this. Christa, of course will accompany you there for further protection."
"So how long will that be?"
"I don't know..."
"And after this unknown amount of time that you don't know about will we be together?" I ask mockingly.
He sighs heavily before his pulls his hand away from me, "I don't know Scarlett."
"Well than tell me something you do know Noah!" I growl at him in frustration, "It seems like you're just trying to put me away somewhere until you feel like this—" I point between the two of us, "Is something that will work for you." I cross my arms over my chest and lift my chin.
"This has nothing to do with us!" He growls at me.
"This has everything to do with us! You said so yourself, that the reason you want to send me away is because you think I'm in danger because of our relationship."
"I don't think you are. I Know you are!" He steps closer to me his body shaking slightly, "Have you been listening to anything anyone's told you. Claire is dead because she was my mate. He would happily do the same to you. Get that through your head! This isn't some fairytale romance that you would believe it to be.
I step closer to him, "I've never once thought of this as a fairytale, if anything it was a nightmare." He growls at my words but I ignore that, "It's my life Noah, and I get a say in how I will live it. So what if I think you're worth that danger? Doesn't that mean anything to you? I want to stay here. I want to be near you. I want to fight with you. Why can't you accept that?"
We are both breathing heavily from the strong emotions that are moving through us. I don't know how it happen but one moment I'm staring up into his eyes and the next I am pulling him down into a heated kiss. He doesn't stop me from kissing him, in fact he pulls me closer to his body kissing me harder. He pushes me away after a moment holding me at arms length, "You will be going away as I've said."
I stare at him for a moment understanding that even though he thinks this is the best thing for me that it's a huge mistake. In truth I know that he's afraid and he want's to push me away because I'm getting to close to him. I sigh and relax in his hold, "Fine—but this is a mistake. We will always be stronger together..." I'm not going to force him into being my mate even though I marked him. I know in my heart that eventually that he'll let me in and accept me completely but today is not that day.
He releases his hold on me and turns away from me, "Pack your things. I'll go arrange everything. Be ready within the hour, I want you away from here as soon as possible." He says with a strained tone before he marches out of the room, closing the door behind himself.
"Well that went well I think..." I say to myself and I feel my wolf whimper in the back of my mind.