Leah felt like her head was caught in a storm, her inside raging while the world around her stayed eerily still.
If you go the the in between today, you're not coming back.
Jared's words spun through her, cutting deeper and deeper with each rotation.
She hadn't known what to expect when he appeared in her room. Logically, she'd suspected it would get ugly. Jared wasn't the sort of person who held back, who shied from confrontation, and she knew he was growing frustrated with her. Everyone was lately.
But the caution he'd shown her was something else. From the moment he stepped inside, worry had coated his face, disappointment tinging the surface. She'd wanted to reassure him, the way she knew he needed, but their entire conversation she felt like she was underwater; her thoughts hazy and unfocused, her mind drifting even when she desperately tried to stay put.
It'd been like that for days now. Every time she tried to talk, the words got stuck somewhere between her brain and her mouth. Every time she felt, her body smothered the emotion. She'd fought it at first, managing to break out in moments of danger or panic, but it was exhausting, and eventually, she'd given up, letting the emptiness encompass her.
She hadn't quite realised how pathetic that was until now, though. Until Jared had said those words.
If you go the the in between today, you're not coming back.
Jared had said many things to her since they'd met — some awful, some heartbreaking, some kind — but he'd never anything like that. Never anything that implied she wasn't capable.
It'd hit her like a blow, and for a moment, the chaos swirling inside her flooded her senses. All the guilt and anger and grief rose up, drowning her, strong enough that her mind couldn't fight it off, and she gasped, trying to breath around it. By the time she felt like she could, Jared had left, and she blinked at the empty room despairingly.
"Wait," she choked out, jerking forward just as she heard Jared snap something at Cassandra from the floor below and the front door slammed.
"Wait!" Leah called again, but no one responded, and she rushed down the stairs and past a confused Alice, exploding onto the porch just in time to catch Cassandra's black coat disappearing into the trees at the end of the street, heading down the track towards the beach.
Leah rushed after them, trying to catch up, but she'd grown weak since she died, and when she reached the portal, they were already gone, the bush empty and quiet.
Leah stared at the portal for a moment, biting her lip.
She didn't want Jared to be in the in between alone. Not again. But if she followed him there now, how would she find him? You couldn't make any noise there. Or shine any light.
The surface of the portal rippled, bulging out towards her, and Leah moved forward cautiously, lifting a finger. Maybe she still had time. He couldn't have gone far from the portal yet.
Her finger made contact with the black surface, and the portal sucked it up quick, clinging like tar. Her body exploded with coldness, pressure pushing down into her ears, and there was a loud rumble, deep, like thunder. The vibrations echoed through her, coalescing in that empty spot in the pit of her stomach in a sharp, bright pain, and Leah jerked back, her heart pounding.
She looked down at her torso, visualising the spot beneath her ribcage where her portal had once sat. She still didn't understand how any of this worked, but that stab had been frightening familiar. She'd felt it often enough since she'd died.
Maybe there was still a part of her connected to the in between. Or maybe that place had grown even more hostile.
Leah swallowed hard, trying to get her thoughts in order. If she went in there unarmed, she'd just become a burden. The only way she'd be able to help Jared was if she had supplies.
Making up her mind, Leah rushed back to the house, knowing each second was one in which Jared moved further away, and she burst back through the front door, darting to the living room and rustling through the pile of weapons.
The floorboards creaked behind her and then there was a hand on her back, warm and light.
"Leah," Alice said, her voice careful. "What are you doing?"
Leah wiped away a furious tear and turned to face her adoptive mother. For a second, she felt a surge of de ja vu. She couldn't count the number of times she'd seen that expression on Alice's face: calm and reassuring, always there to talk Leah down.
"I need weapons," Leah said, her voice horse from misuse. "I have to go to the in between."
Alice's face clouded and she dropped her hand, taking a step back.
"I don't think Jared wanted you to go today, darling," she said, her voice gentle.
Leah felt the tears rising up again, the frustration — at herself, at every one else.
"I don't care," she said. "He could get hurt. I'm supposed to be there with him."
Alice stared at her for a moment. "Has he gone already?"
Leah didn't reply, but Alice took the silence for the acknowledgement it was and nodded.
"Then it's too late," she said. "You know that."
Leah closed her eyes, trying to fight off the words even though she knew Alice was right.
"I can't just do nothing. I can't wait here while..."
Leah trailed off, unable to utter the words.
While everyone else fixes the mistake I made.
Alice grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze, and Leah knew she'd understood.
"You're not doing nothing," Alice said. "You can stay here with me and look after Danny. Zarah should be back soon too. I saw the portal over the station close a couple minutes ago."
Leah looked down at their joined hands, and she could feel that emptiness creeping back in, that hopelessness.
"Come on," Alice said after a moment, her voice commanding. "Come sit by Danny and I'll make us some tea."
Leah allowed Alice to lead her to Danny's room and place her in a bedside chair before disappearing to the kitchen, but for a while, Leah just looked down at her hands. She couldn't face whatever illness had consumed her brother. Not when it was just another outcome of her mistakes.
But after a while, Danny let out a sharp cough, and Leah's eyes flicked up involuntarily.
He was lying on his back, his face scrunched in pain, and Leah couldn't help but think he looked even worse; like all the colour and spark was slowly draining from him. She watched a bead of sweat trickle down his forehead and soak into the pillow and then he let out another cough, jerking with the movement.
Leah cringed back as if he'd hit her, and she grabbed his hand, guilt flooding her.
"Please fight this Danny," she said, hoping he could hear her. "Please. I need you to be okay."
Danny didn't respond, but more sweat broke out on his forehead and Leah watched him, trying not to cry.
Danny didn't deserve this. None of them deserved what she'd brought down on them.
Danny jerked again, and Leah gripped his hand tighter, but this time, the collar of his shirt slipped aside slightly, and Leah saw something that made her heart stop.
The top of Danny's chest was dark, the skin bruised an ugly deep purple.
Leah dropped his hand, fumbling with the sheets as she pulled them down and wrenched Danny's shirt up. The entirety of Danny's chest had turned to a pulsing, dark surface, his ribcage enlarged as if it'd been inflamed.
"Danny?" Leah asked, her voice high, panicked.
She grabbed his hand again, squeezing tight, trying to get a response. It didn't work, and she moved to his shoulders, shaking him.
"Danny? Can you hear me?"
Danny let out a groan, and slowly, his eyelids slid open.
Leah held back a scream, trying not to let the fear show on her face. Because as Danny looked at her, she found herself staring into eyes that'd turned entirely black.
...
Next chapter out in two weeks!
- Skylar xx