TW Death, animal cruelty, violence, blood. Mentioned shooting, swearing,
Please let me know if I missed any
It was all over the news. Astin had escaped, and a new vigilante was at the scene, or rather, a very old one.
According to Tommy, the heros did some digging, and found a tucked away file detailing the three of them, and his name, Vespa.
Tubbo didn't have time to care about that though. He was busy every moment of his life. Working, worrying, keeping peace between people, keeping his brothers alive.
Even the little moments of silence he had, when the world stopped turning for a minute, that worry was at the bottom of a long list. Things that seeped into him where there were cracks in the walls and chinks in his armor.
A sea of black, seeping through his skin little by little. He had much bigger things to worry over. Like Death.
Tubbo shivered, how many times has he almost lost them? How many more before it was over, before they were free, or they were dead?
Icy arms snaked around Tubbo, and Ranboo muttered something into his hair.
"You okay?" Ranboo asked, his eyes glowing inquisitively.
"Yep, no worse than usual." Tubbo said cheerily.
Ranboo tilted his head, "Mhm, you definitely are shuttering from how cold I am, nothing else."
"Yep, you're just cold today." Tubbo said nonchalantly.
"Mhm" Ranboo retracted his arms and stood up. "Well, since I'm too cold, I'll sit on the couch until Tommy gets home."
He walked out of the room, his tail swishing lazily as he went. Tubbo lied on his back, and stared at the ceiling.
Tubbo sighed and sat up, "It's just, how long can we do this?" And within that question several others were laced. How long can we keep secrets? How can we break the truth to him? How will I keep us all together?
"I don't know." And it seemed to answer all of them.
"We don't know anything anymore, do we?" Tubbo laughs, but it's strangled and bitter.
"We know how to protect ourselves, how to stay alive." Ranboo said softly.
"What do we do? We kill people Ranboo! Our way of protecting ourselves is to kill others. That's no way to live, what would Tommy think when we finally break it to him, what we were, what we still are? We're not in the arena anymore!"
The taller looked taken aback for a moment, almost hurt. But his eyes narrowed, and he snapped his tail like a whip.
Here they were again, standing on the edge, just a breath away from falling, and Tubbo faltered. Ranboo's eyes burned with rage, and pent up fury. But he stood there, like a snake coiled and ready to spring.
But then the door clicked open, and Tommy stepped into the apartment. Ranboo flicked his tail and walked into the bedroom. A silent way to shelf this for later.
Tubbo turned to Tommy, who stood wide eyed in the doorway.
"Are you going to tell me what that was about?"
"It's nothing, nothing important anyway."
Tommy raised an eyebrow. "Sure, it's definitely not important to tell me any of this nothing that is clogging up the apartment like smoke."
"Just, don't worry about it. It's fine."
Tommy looked like he wanted to protest, but then Ranboo walked out of the room, and took out a cereal box. "By the way, we have to get to District 11 by sundown, so I'd suggest you either sleep, or get ready, or both."
Elanna was curled around the oldest's shoulders, watching intently as he made three bowls of cereal.
The same fox sat diligently on a stump as the people she helped walked through the fog towards others. She's not supposed to be with the other people, but sometimes she saunters over anyway. Just close enough to see through the fog.
She'd lie there and listen to them, their voices and words always radiating emotion. Nothing like Kit who keeps her voice calm, or Caz who's voice is just nothing. It's quite interesting.
But now she lies here in the fog, and the boys don't say much. One is worried, he fronts it with defensiveness, but he's worried. Another is teeming with resentment, and laced in it, betrayal. And the other is regretful.
This one is always regretful, his sadness stretching like an empty chasm. It's always there, even if other things overlap it.
There's always regret and sorrow in these three.
Even though the fox is still pretty young by standards, she's seen her fair share. Watched people brutally murder each other on the streets, or toss animals into rivers, tied up in bags.
She wasn't born here, not even on the streets. She was born far away from here, thrown into a river before her one month mark. Her mother shot, and her brothers and sisters tossed too.
Now she lives here, and takes care of the boys. Making sure they don't die as only a fox can. That was how she looked at it. To help out and watch over them. Make sure no one ties them up and tosses them into a river, or shoots them down.
Of course, if she had it her way, she'd live with them, patrol with them every night, she'd poke them until they couldn't worry, and lick them until they couldn't be sad, and make sure they return to Kit safely every month. But she can't, she has jobs around here, like to train up the younger ones. A red one named Tana is almost ready for work.
Red, not white. That's the one thing she'll never get over. No matter how many foxes will pass through here, none of them are like her, some are red, or sandy yellow, or beige, or black, or gray, or look like coyotes, some are even silver. But none of them are white.
Heck, Elanna wasn't even white anymore. Maybe that was for the better, was it so bad to not feel like a misfit?
As the big reunion came to an end, the little fox sidled off into the mist, readily awaiting the next time she can see the boys, her boys that she takes care of.
As Tubbo watched the sun set, he felt empty. There were so many broken things around him, and he didn't know how he was going to fix any of them without falling.
He was on a tightrope and everything he needed to fix things were just out of his reach.
Tommy was certainly upset, and Ranboo was angry. The kind of quiet anger that ran under under every word he said.
"How can I do this?" He asked the sky sadly. "I've broken so much, and this time it might be too fractured to fix."
He inhaled sharply, the cold air filling his lungs as he spoke, his words being lost to the sky.
"Tommy is upset with me, he knows something is wrong. He's too good at reading people to not know. And Ranboo- I'm not sure that I can fix it this time." He scrubbed his face. "Fuck, I fucked up. The only thing I do is fuck things up. Why can't I leave well enough alone?"
The sky was silent, and Tubbo didn't know if it was silently judging him, or thinking, 'WELL WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?'
"I just feel like everything I do is pushing the three of us further apart, that nothing will work to bring us back together."
The stars shimmered, dull from the light pollution. It's not broken. It can be fixed. Tubbo laughed, bitter and broken. "And then what? We go back to walking on each other's toes. I don't want to hurt them, and I feel like I do."
He sighed. "Maybe I shouldn't be here." He paused for a moment. "Maybe they'd be better off without me, and I should just leave." The world seemed to stand still and the stars held their breath. Tubbo knew he didn’t mean it, he knew he could never leave them.
"What?" It was as soft as the breeze, but unmistakable. Tubbo turned around and saw Ranboo, looking all the sad and heartbroken that Tubbo felt.
"I'm sorry, I just misspoke, I don't want things to change, I was just-" He left out saying that they were still brothers and that would never change.
"I- I don't want you to go. Ever." Ranboo said softly, but firmly.
And I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to push the three of us away, I don't want to lose you but I'm worried I already did.
"I- can we talk, please?" Ranboo almost pleaded.
"I- I don't know." I don't want to hurt you, don't want to test the waters, don't want my worries to become our reality. Tubbo curled his hands into his chest.
"R-right, yeah." The defeated tone made Tubbo look up. Ranboo looked so desperately sad, and scared. Like he was just as worried that frail strings would snap.
You're in it together. In it for the long run. As if a lightning bolt cracked behind his eyes, he realized he wasn't alone in this. Ranboo was just as scared, and just as worried. You're not alone.
That feeling, just of not being alone, grew in his chest, expanding like a star, glowing and warm.
I'm so scared, what of I only hurt him.
That's okay, life is scary, and hard, and things can be rough, you know this first hand.
What if I make things worse?
What if you fix them?
"Sure." With that word, Tubbo threw both of them over the edge of the gaping chasm.
At the end, Tubbo felt empty again, but in a good way this time. He hugged Ranboo tightly, letting himself sink into his brother's embrace.
"I'm not too cold am I?"
Tubbo laughed welly, "Fuck you."
He inhaled deeply, but stopped short, tensing as a familiar smell met his nostrils.
"What is it?" Ranboo pulled away, his eyes flickering with concern.
"Smoke."
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Cliffhanger
Did you guys enjoy the snippet of Elanna's life?
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Have a great day/night my friends! 💙💙💙💙