Title: Bearable
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Slight Angst, Fluff
Warnings: mentions of insecurities (what else is new?)
Word Count: 705
Author's Note: I honestly have no idea what I was thinking while writing this. This is just a feeling I get often, and I had the sudden urge to put it into words. Am I selfish for subtly writing about myself in basically all of my stories? Yes, and that probably makes me a bad writer. So I'm sorry if it's bad lol.
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Haechan silently observed you, sitting beside him on the sofa. The clock read nine p.m., as the second movie of the night played on the screen. Even though your eyes were glued to the screen, he could tell something was distracting you.
He knew by the way you were chewing on your lips, and the way your fingers subconsciously dug into your palms. It only took one look at your nervous composure for Haechan to know that your mind was far away from whatever was happening in the movie.
"You're going to tear off your skin if you keep doing that." He scolded lightly, drawing your attention to him in slight alarm.
You looked down in guilt when he opened your hand to see the red indents from your nails. Your brain scrambled with something to say as his fingers softly rubbed your palm. The stinging slowly begins to fade.
"Care to share what's on your mind?" Haechan asked, glancing up at you.
The softness in his eyes made you instantly tear up. You knew staying up all night with your best friend was a bad idea. All your senses seemed to shut off after 8:30, leaving you completely vulnerable.
"I just..." You started to say, looking away to blink back tears. "Seeing the couple in the film...just makes me sad."
He half-chuckled at your cuteness, "Why does it make you sad?"
Haechan was the only person who saw this side of you. Not the (Y/n) was smiling in front of their friends, pretending as if her life wasn't falling apart. Not the (Y/n) who casually belittled herself in conversations laced with sarcasm and dark humor. No, Haechan saw the (Y/n) who had a weak and sensitive heart.
"I really want to experience a love like theirs," You said, breath shaky. "But I'm afraid it'll never happen to me."
"Why do you think that?"
"I mean, just look at me Hyuck. I'm a mess." The bitter smile that appeared across your face made his heart crack. There was no emotion in your voice.
"Seriously, I can't think of one reason why you like me," You sniffed.
Haechan was slightly taken aback by what you said. After four years of keeping it in, he finally confessed his feelings for you a few weeks ago. He made it clear that he didn't expect an answer from you right away and would wait. Since then, the two of you went on and acted like it never happened. He didn't expect you to bring the confession up now.
After a few moments, Haechan spoke up. "You may not like your hair or your body. You may not like the mole on your nose that you hide with your glasses. You may not like the stories you pour your heart and soul into. You may turn down any compliment that someone gives you."
You met his eyes which also became watery. Just thinking about how poorly you saw yourself made Haechan's heart hurt. That was how much he cared about you.
"But when I look at you," He continued. "All I see is a smart and beautiful girl who doesn't realize how strong she is. I love everything that you don't like about yourself."
His other hand reached over to catch the tears that streamed down your cheeks.
"I love you, (Y/n). And I'll happily spend the rest of my life giving you the love you deserve if you'll let me."
His words were so warm and promising. There was no one in the world like Lee Donghyuck.
"I love you too," You said through tears. It felt so good to say that out loud, after holding back because of your insecurities.
Immediately after that sentence, Haechan kissed you ever so gently. With one hand in your hair and the other around your waist, pulling you close to him. His touch gradually allowed the troublesome thoughts to temporarily fade away. You knew that they would come back another day. But all the darkness in your life was bearable, as long as Haechan was by your side.
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