She didn't want to give me an answer. I just suddenly felt my back touch the mattress, while she got on top of me. "Y/n—" I couldn't even finish, I felt a sudden wave of pleasure rush inside my body as her lips came in contact with me, while she pressed her crotch right on mine.
I slightly parted my lips and let out a moan. I didn't expect this rush of things going inside me. I gripped her hips and slightly dug my fingers into her flesh. It was the first time I was so flustered and felt so much things. I didn't know how to describe them, but I felt way too good for my own health.
"Wait—" She wouldn't let me talk. Her lips cut me off once again, while she slowly moved against me, expressing really good what she wanted from me.
I couldn't stop gripping her hips harshly and follow the movements of them. I didn't want it to stop, but we weren't supposed to do that. It felt so right, but wrong at the same time, which was so exciting.
I put my hand around her throat and gently pulled away. "Y/n," I caught my breath."I don't know what it is that you want," I knew really well. "But we can't."
"Why not?" She softly said, still moving her hips, slowly, back and forth, just the way I liked it.
I lightly tighten my hand around her throat and gripped her hip with my left hand. "Stop." I tightened my jaw, finding it hard to resist her.
She teasingly smiled. "It just makes me want to do the opposite, when you're being like that."
"Stop being a brat and listen to me for fuck's sake, Y/n." I tried calming down, because my dick was hard as fuck and my heart was still beating so fast. "I cannot. We cannot. You're injured and I don't want to do it. Not like that and not now."
"I don't get it. Isn't that what you wanted from me?" Her tone was more serious. She sounded confused and sad. I didn't know, but I knew that I didn't like what she just said.
"What do you take me for?" I let go of her and looked at her with a serious expression. "I mean I know what you take me for, but I cannot do that to you. And it's my fault, I gave you this image of myself. Of course, I won't lie. You're fucking attractive and I'd love fucking you, but not like this."
"Then what do you want from me?"
"I want you, but not like this, not now. I want to be patient with you and actually build something real and honest and show you that I actually care about you and not only because I want to have sex with you."
She didn't answer, but only looked at me. I kept going. "Fuck. Y/n," I heavily sighed. "You cannot just give yourself to someone like that. It's not healthy for yourself."
"Why do you care? When did you start caring and what do you mean with building something real and honest? I don't fucking get it."
"Do you really think I wouldn't care about you? I stayed with you the whole time when you felt like shit after your brother situation and when you got shot, because of me. Do you really think I don't care about you?" I nervously chuckled. "You have no idea how much you're invading my fucking mind all the damn time. I had to fuck Ivy and it did not even fucking work and on top of that, you had to see that. Damn Y/n, be fucking for real right now. I fucking like you and you cannot even see that." I threw my head back, feeling tired. I felt like I was talking to a wall.
"How was I supposed to see it?"
"I don't know. Read my fucking mind." I rolled my eyes. "I just really, really like you. I don't know why, I just do. I can't change it and I won't have sex with you. I won't." I shook my head, convincing myself of the impossible.
"What are you even saying?" She acted dumb.
"I like you. Romantically. As in, I have feelings for you. Like, I feel butterflies whenever you're around." I felt shy. It was the first time, after a long time that I told someone I liked them. I could be a soft guy when I wanted to.
"Shut the fuck up." She hit my shoulder and chuckled.
"You don't have to feel the same. I just wanted to tell you." I shrugged. "So don't expect any type of sexual activity with me."
"Kook, I do like you, but with everything that happened in such a short span of time with Namjoon and all the other shit, I want to be sure of my feelings and not just give you an answer, because you suddenly confessed about it. I want to be honest with you." She softly said.
"Okay," I nodded. "But you're not fucking anyone. Since I told you that I like you, you're basically obligated to stay loyal and I don't care if my feelings are not reciprocated."
"I'm glad you said that, because that means you're not fucking Ivy and any other 'Miss Girl' you planned on fucking."
"I didn't plan to."
She smiled. "So you want to be patient with me and show me that you actually do care about me?"
I nodded as I put my hands on her thighs. "Yeah."
"I want to."
"I want it too, really. But not now." I squeezed her thigh and smiled. I had to take all the little rest of rational thoughts I had in my mind to not pin her down my bed and pound her so bad that she'd faint.
"I'm going to wait." She leaned over and kissed my cheek. "I want to know where this will go."
I chuckled at her silliness.
She was cute.
...5 hours later
"That's how my dad died and then my brother left home. Like you saw, my mom is a crazy junkie." She paused to look at me.
We had taken a nap after talking about random things, and we woke up, I asked her about her life, because I wanted to know everything about her. She ended up telling me the story that lead her to end up here, between my arms and her head resting on my chest.
"I used to feel bad for leaving her there, even though It was not planned at all. I felt like she needed help, but she did not want to receive it and at the same time, I was resenting her for cheating on my dad, because that's the reason he died."
"She looked really...sick." I didn't know which word to use, to describe the state she was in when we went there.
"I don't know." She shrugged and put her hand on my chest. "I don't care."
"Do you think you'll ever want to talk to your brother again?"
"Of course. I am just really disappointed and mad at him. On top of that, he had to be friends with Namjoon."
"Did you talk to him?"
"No." She sighed.
"I think you should. I mean, you weren't in a relationship, but you somehow got involved with him, you know."
"What should I say to him? 'Oh you knew me way before I even stepped a foot in the house, spied on me, kidnapped me, then fucked me and humiliated me in front of everyone, but I forgive you though.' Should I say that?"
It still made me mad that they both had sex, and multiple times at that. "Do you have feelings for him?"
"No. I think that I got attached to him, because I had just gotten out of an abusive household, and I was way more mentally and emotionally unstable than now. He made me feel safe and listened to me when I needed to talk. There was some physical attraction, of course, but I know for sure I didn't feel hurt because I liked him, but because he betrayed me and took advantage of the trust I had given to him."
"Hm."
She looked at me. "Don't be mad." She held my chin between her fingers.
"I can't stop imagining the both of you." I teased her, but I was still jealous.
"Jungkook, I did not even have to imagine, I saw it."
"Fair enough." I ran my hand through her hair. "I don't even talk to any girls at the moment."
"Give me your phone." She opened her hand in front of me and asked me for it.
"Why? You don't believe me?"
"No, I don't. I'm going to block all of them."
I raised my eyebrow, but didn't say anything. I took my phone and gave it to her. "Are you actually letting me do it?" She chuckled. "I need your Face ID." She put the phone in front of my face and unlocked it.
"I don't care. I told you that I like you, not them. If you want to delete them, you can do it."
She scrolled through my phone, deleted and blocked all of the girls I had in my phone. She looked through my pictures. There was no pictures of myself with the girls I hooked up with, because why would I take a pic or video of them. There were pictures of myself though.
"I like this one." She giggled and zoomed on the picture. "You have a nice body."
"I know."
"Shut up and say thank you." She playfully hit me and kept looking at the other stuff on my phone.
She played a few games on my phone before turning it off and giving it back to me. "I thought it was going to be worse."
"You really have the wrong idea about me." I laughed.
"Did you ever have a girlfriend?"