"You're leaving already?" Nat asked Nick with concern.
Nick Bosa had already put on his boxer briefs and his shorts and was in the process of putting on his shoes. He looked back at Nat with a playful smile.
"Sorry, I didn't think you would want me to stay."
"Well I wouldn't mind it." Nat said softly.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" He threw back.
Nat crossed over to the bed and took a seat with her back turned towards him. Truth be told, she didn't expect this experience to change her mind on dating Nick, no matter how exhilarating it had been. But still, Nat was bothered by how quickly Nick seemed to move on. This was the guy who had driven to her apartment when he should've been fast asleep, getting ready for his game in a few days. Where had all that passion gone?
Nick seemed to notice the tension from Nat's silence as he stopped what he was doing after putting on his socks.
"Are you okay? I didn't hurt you did I?"
I'm not gonna give you the satisfaction. "I'm perfectly fine" she said, not fine.
Nick debated whether or not to accept her words but then added, "You're mad at me?"
At this Nat turned quickly but then decided to go back to playing it cool. She avoided his gorgeous brown eyes as she stared at the shoes in front of him.
"I'm not mad. Why would I be mad?"
Nick looked at her confused. "Uh you shouldn't be?"
"Then I'm not mad. And you don't have to worry about me being mad."
Nick sighed as he rubbed the back of his neck with one of the hands he had used to grip Nat so tightly to him moments ago.
"Nat, do you want me to stay?"
Nat stared up at his face but still avoided his eyes.
"I want you to do whatever you want to do."
"Nat I can stay if you want. It might be easier that way, I can go to sleep earlier."
"Are you staying because you want to or because you think I want you to?"
Nick's expression had equal amounts of frustration and fear written all over it. He sighed again and took a seat next to Nat, forcing her to meet his eyes.
"Nat, I want to stay. But I want to hear you say it. Come on, you were taking direction so well earlier..." He said teasingly.
Nat, however, was not amused. She looked into his eyes blankly as she coldly stated, "Nick why did you come here? To actually talk and spend the night? Or did you just come to fuck me?"
Nick shifted uncomfortably on the bed. His prolonged silence had already answered Nat's question, but he decided to confirm what she suspected.
"Nat I seriously couldn't stop thinking of you. And since you said you wouldn't go on a date with me, I figured you would... you know... help me get over you?"
Wrong answer Nicholas.
Nat stood up quickly and began to get dressed again. She silently threw on her shirt and slid her underwear and shorts back up. Once dressed, she pulled her hair into a messy bun and began to strip the soiled covers from her bed. Nick silently observed her until he had to get up from the bed.
"Nat... you good? Do you need any help?"
Nat shook her head as she flashed a sarcastic smile to her former lover. She took the bedsheets and walked them over to the in unit washer-dryer she had in her apartment. As she put in the sheets and added the detergent, Nick emerged from her room and followed her.
"Nat, don't do this. Talk to me. If you're upset, I don't want to leave without talking first."
This caught Nat's attention who jerked to face the defensive end.
"Oh so now you want to stay? But like actually stay and not because I want you to stay?"
Nick's eyes widened for a brief moment before returning to normal. Nat could see his brain work overtime to compensate for all the potential mines laying in front of him. This time he didn't let the silence linger, and instead he decided to go on the offensive.
"Damn it Nat this isn't fair. I want you, you know I do. If it were me this would've been our third time and you would be in my bed and under my covers. You're the one who doesn't want this, I thought I was doing what you wanted by leaving before we got too emotional."
"Well how sweet of you to do what you think is best for me. But newsflash: we broke a major rule today. I figured we might as well go all the way if we were already doing something we weren't supposed to. But no if you want to just leave that's perfectly fine with me. Good luck with getting that third time though."
Nat pressed start on the washer and then tried to walk away but Nick blocked her way.
"Nat, stop it. You're acting crazy." Nick put his strong hands on Nat's arms but rather than get warm to his touch she was as cold as possible. "I'm not going to leave. I'm going to stay here, get back in bed, and I want you to come with me."
Nat studied his face and tried to ignore the faint warm feeling she was getting once she saw how honest his expression was. But it was too late, she had felt the stinging sensation of being a hookup she knew far too well, and if her body was once open to him, it was now closing time and Nick didn't have to go home but he wasn't going to stay there.
"Nick, answer me this. Did you want to start hooking up regularly or was this just a once off? What did you think was going to happen after this?"
Nick looked at her and she could see the panic in his eyes growing little by little. As he took a deep breath, she decided to twist her verbal knife.
"There is a right answer by the way." It's just not one of the options I gave you.
After another moment of silence, Nick finally worked up to courage to speak.
"I had hoped. That we could just have fun... and see where this takes us."
Ooh, so close. But not the answer we were looking for. Try again next week!
Nat pushed her way past him and was slightly surprised he had let her. She made it all the way to her room, picked up his shirt and his shoes then dropped the shoes off at the front door as she handed his shirt back to him. Nick was silent, still trying to determine if he diffused or set off the ticking bomb in front of him.
She put her arm through his and escorted him to the front door. Once there she opened the door, picked up his shoes and tossed them into the hallway. Nick dropped his mouth but quickly picked it up as he came to the realization that he neither diffused nor set off the bomb. He merely delayed it.
Nat sternly looked into his eyes. "I don't know who you think I am, but here's something you should know about me. I would much rather be a one-night stand than a fuck buddy. Have a safe drive. Oh, and text me when you get home. I still care about you."
Nat smacked the famous Bosa butt as she encouraged him to step over the door frame. Once he was safely on the other side, she gave a slight wave as she closed the creaky door.
"Nat... I'm sorry. Can you open the door please?" She heard Nick plead as she entertained the idea in her head.
But instead she turned the lock and then headed back to her room.
...
Nat woke up far earlier than she would've liked on her first Sunday off in a month. After brushing her teeth, she went to pick up her phone from her nightstand and begrudgingly typed a message to Ellie:
Nat: hey, good luck at the game today. sorry I won't be there. can you tell Nick good luck for me?
Nat sent the message with a loud sigh. Ever since the night they slept together, Nat had been ignoring Nick and his messages. In all honesty, Nat had calmed down about the situation after a day, and after 2 days she already regretted how she blew up on him. She didn't mean to overreact, however something about what Nick had told her rubbed her the wrong way, and given that emotions were high, she tried not to beat herself up over it too much. At first she was ignoring Nick because she was mad, but then she started to ignore him on principle. She didn't want him to think of her as just a friend with benefits, but at this moment she was missing her friend.
Nat looked at the chain of messages Nick had sent her and contemplated texting him good luck herself:
Nick: just got home. I'm sorry. you're more than just a one night stand to me. please just let me know when you're ready to talk.
Nick: missed talking to you today. lunch wasn't the same without you. I even saved you an extra parfait
Nick: I know you need space but I just wanted to say I'm sorry again. I wish you would text me back
Nick: good night Nat. miss you
The last message was sent the previous night at 10pm. Nat felt guilty that she was keeping him up the night before a game, but she still wasn't sure what to say to him. Sleeping together was one thing, hearing him want to start casually hooking up was another, but more than anything she just couldn't find the words she needed to explain to him why she was so hurt by what he said.
Nat put her phone in her pocket and began her morning routine. She cooked herself up a breakfast of 2 hard boiled eggs which she ate with an English muffin and two slices of Canadian bacon. On the side she had a strawberry Greek yogurt and washed it all down with a French vanilla iced coffee. She settled onto her couch so she could begin watching the latest show everyone was talking about. Apparently it was based on some video game revolving around an infectious disease that wiped out civilization, but Nat was more interested in it because of the charming lead actor. Still, not even he could take her mind off the man who was somewhere in Arizona, no doubt a little groggy since he didn't get his full night's rest.
After binging the first 3 episodes and being moved to tears, Nat decided to take a break. She decided to check her phone which had been going off so much during her binge she had put it on silent. Checking the notifications, she saw herself getting tagged underneath the post of another person who appeared to be some sort of influencer. Nat checked the profile and was greeted by a "Misty Mason", someone who Nat had never heard of.
She went to the post in question and saw it was a video of this Misty girl grabbing onto the arm of a tall, ripped man who Nat would swear was an NFA player, she just couldn't remember which team and what his name was. But what really got Nat was the caption of the post.
"When your ex leaves you but doesn't know his replacement is twice the man he is #nothingfakehere"
Then it clicked to Nat. This wasn't some ditzy influencer. It was Jeff Giordano's ex-girlfriend. And judging by the comments, Nat had become public enemy #1. All underneath the posts were people tagging her, some with rat emojis, others just being snarky implying Nat was nothing compared to the amazing Misty Mason. If Nat had actually met her, she might've been more offended. But given that this was essentially a stranger who really wasn't doing anything more than slightly shading her, Nat didn't think it was worth the time to engage.
At that moment, Nat received a much needed distraction in the form of her best friend calling her.
"Oh perfect, you answered. I'm dying to know what you wanted to tell me about Nick"
"Oh my God Stef, I hope you have some time, this is gonna be a long one."
"Well if it's anything like the tea with Giordano I'm sure it's gonna be great. You really have me considering getting a job for the NFA. You've only been there for a month and somehow got the two hottest players on the hottest team all over you."
Nat rolled her eyes. "First of all, one of them is not wrapped all over me. And second of all, the other one wasn't wrapped all over me so much as I was wrapped all over him..."
Nat recounted her night with the former defensive rookie of the year to her best friend in explicit detail. Stef loved football players, so she didn't miss out on asking a single detail. From every vein in his forearm, to the awkward encounter after, Nat told her best friend every single thing possible.
"OH MY GOD NAT YOU ARE MY FUCKING HERO" Stef exclaimed with more passion than Nat had ever heard from her. Nat laughed as she recalled the night she spent with Nick. Now that it had been a couple days removed, Nat had no problem saying it was the best sex she had ever had.
On the other end Stef continued, "So wait what happens now? You still haven't talked to him?"
Nat exhaled loudly. "No. I really want to Stef but I just don't know what to say. Give me a line?"
"Well girl let's unpack that. Why were you so bothered by the sexiest defensive player in the league telling you he wanted to fuck your brains out on a regular basis?"
Nat scoffed at her friend's attempt to paint her as crazy. "Because... I'm not trying to be some fuck buddy. Coach Callaghan literally threatened me that same day saying I was 'not allowed to get close to ANY player' and well..."
Nat could hear Stef sucking her teeth. "Girl, does Callaghan live with you? Is he going to be inspecting your pussy to see who all's been there? Fuck Callaghan he doesn't need to know"
Fair point there I guess.
"But Stef, it's more than that. It's just..." Nat sighed as she struggled to verbalize her thoughts. But her best friend picking up on her tone seemed to already know where this was headed.
"Girl... don't tell me this is about D-Baggard."
Nat's silence answered the question her voice struggled to.
"Oh girl... look I know he fucked you up, but are you gonna let him interfere in your new relationship? Your new relationship with a 10/10 absolute dreamboat hunk with thighs bigger than your head?"
Nat sighed again as she felt her eyes begin to water. She had thought she was over Dustin Haggard but given the sudden rush of emotions, she realized he was still all over her, cloaking her like a rain cloud.
Stef continued, "Sis, I know it's hard. I know how much you loved him. But Nick Bosa is not Dustin Haggard. He doesn't want to hurt you or hide you. It's the opposite- he literally wants to date you. And I get Callaghan and the team can be annoying but come on, don't treat him like he's D-Baggard."
At this Nat finally found her voice, "BUT HOW DO I KNOW HE'S NOT?! He told me he wanted to sleep with me to see where it would go. I spent the better part of last year with a guy who kept telling me that I was his special secret, that we couldn't go out on dates because he didn't want to share me with the world. Our entire relationship was born and died in the walls of our bedrooms. And now here comes Mr. Nick Bosa with his beautiful smile and his beautiful eyes and his beautiful body telling me he wanted to fuck me because I wouldn't go out with him... how am I supposed to feel?!"
Stef's silence on the other end made Nat think maybe she had gone too far, but as always her friend had listened intently and was thinking carefully of what to say next.
"Nat... you know he only said that because you told him you wouldn't go out with him. After kissing him. Twice. And even then he still wanted to stay. Yeah I get he fucked up, but come one. If you had played that better you would've been snuggling with that gorgeous hunk of a man. Nick Bosa is not Dustin Haggard."
"I know that, but what I don't know is who Nick Bosa is. I barely know the guy. We've known each other for what, a month? I know I like him... but what if I just like the idea of him? What if the man I think he is isn't who he actually is? What if-"
"You're asking a lot of questions when you could get your answers by talking to him. What if you messaged him? Naty I love you but you're making this so complicated and for what?"
Nat thought carefully of all the reasons she had not to pursue Nick Bosa any further. "Because I don't want to get fired and cost me and Raf our jobs. Because I don't want to get my heart broken by another football player who wants me for sex. Because..." Nat swallowed hard, "Because I really really like him and I don't think I can do this. Stef I haven't felt this way since Dustin, I'm scared."
Nat could feel Stef's soft gaze through the phone. "Naty, I know it's scary. Love is a terrifying thing. But all those good feelings you've had, all those ways you told me Nick makes you feel, don't you think it makes it worth it? No one knows for sure what'll happen if you and Nick start dating, but I can tell you for sure what's gonna happen if you keep going like this. You're gonna spend the rest of your life wondering what would've happened if you had just taken the risk and gone out with him. Football is a game, so is love. Are you going to play or not?"
Upon the conclusion of her friend's words, Nat received a message from Nick. It had a picture attached, so Nat would have to open it to read whatever he said and see what he sent.
"Stef... I gotta go. Nick just texted me."
"Ooh wait okay let me see and we can think of what to say."
Nat wiped a tear from her cheek. "No... I want to see and talk to him by myself."
"Ugh okay fine, just when it started getting interesting. But you're taking screenshots and sending them to me later."
"Will do. Thanks Stef." With that, Nat hung up and opened the message from the man of the hour:
Nick: wish I could hear the real thing, but this is almost as good. Can't wait 'til I get to talk to you again.
Attached was a picture of the smallest bear, situated in Nick's temporary locker at the Arizona game. Nat knew players left their phones in their lockers for the whole game, so it was very likely this was the last thing he would send before he would go out against the Arizona Roadrunners. Nat stared at the picture, at the smallest bear she had gotten Nick for his birthday, and felt her heart fill her entire chest.
I can't believe he brought it with him to Arizona. God, how many times has he pressed it? He's gonna run out the batteries.
Nat stared at the photo, forgetting all of the previous negative emotions she had up to that point. She tried to think of something she could respond with, though she knew Nick likely wouldn't see it until after the game. After a few seconds of thinking, she settled on heart reacting the picture of the smallest bear, and typed the following message:
Nat: great job small bear. my favorite part was when you got that sack. I hope we can talk after that win :)
...
Just as Nat predicted, the San Francisco Pioneers cleared their second divisional rival 33-14, earned their 4th straight win, and Nick had gotten a major sack that resulted in a fumble. Nat could hardly contain her excitement and she texted Ellie to give Nick a big congratulatory hug on her behalf. She was still waiting on Nick to respond to the message she sent before the game, but she was already planning a mental script of what she wanted to say to him.
Nat entered the kitchen to retrieve her dinner as the post game press interviews played in the background. She made a special chipotle lasagna recipe she found online and was eager to taste the finished product. Nat removed the dish from the oven and put the timer to let it cool. She looked on the tv screen as she saw her "ex boyfriend" Jeff Giordano talk about the Pioneers dominant victory.
Once his interview concluded, Nat opened up Instagram and was surprised to see even more notifications. Apparently her new fan Misty Mason had made another shady post, this time emphasizing her own boyfriend's 5th straight win of the season. Nat was surprised to see the new man she had found for herself was none other than the quarterback for the Philadelphia Vultures. How she managed to make that happen so quickly, Nat had no idea. But she did know the NFA circle was surprisingly small. It wasn't completely out of the realm of possibility for them to get together so fast.
Nat decided to mute her notifications for the time being in hopes that it would blow over. Nothing was going to stop her from the good vibes she was on since the Pioneers victory. The timer on her phone went off and she hastily cut herself a piece of the lasagna. If it were good, she was planning on offering some the next day to Nick in her attempt at an apology. She brought the steaming plate to the living room where she placed it on the table and decided to wait just a few more minutes before taking a bite.
Just then, Nat was notified of the message she was awaiting for. Clear as day she saw Nick had heart reacted to the prophetic message she sent before the game. She opened the conversation and watched with anticipation as the 3 dots began flashing on her screen:
Nick: thanks Nat :)
can I call you?
Before Nat could type her response she began to receive a call. She was surprised to see it was Raf calling her, not Nick. She hesitated for a moment, wanting to talk to Nick, but she figured a quick conversation with Raf wouldn't hurt.
"Sup rowdy Raf. What's going on?"
Nat could hear Raf breathing heavily on the other end. He tried to speak but Nat could hear him cough and sob. The hairs on her arm began to rise.
"Nat, I'm sorry, I-" He broke out into another sob.
"Raf what's going on?" Nat asked suddenly serious.
It was a few seconds before Raf responded, but by this point Nat already knew why he was calling.
"It's about my mom"