Thank you so much for reading!💜
*Can be a bit depressing*
-Enjoy-
...........
His blank eyes darted over the wall. He was feeling so empty inside, his puffy eyes made it difficult for him to keep his eyes open for too long but his racing thoughts made it extremely hard for him to get a blink of sleep. It seemed to have left.
A dark cloud was wrapped around his brain, his heart seemed to have stopped over-reacting. His body was feeling very cold even under the covers but his brain refused to pay any attention, refused to show any sympathy, was it because his emotions were absent that his brain also refused to cooperate?
The first few tears left his tired onyx eyes, his fingers refused to wipe them away. He was so physically exhausted, even lifting a finger seemed too much, moving seemed too much.....
breathing felt like a chore.........
Yet it was so easy to realise that he was indeed alive and not dying.
---------
"Jungkook?" his door creaked open as someone entered the room, he recognised the voice very well, he had become familiar with it over the past 2 months, after all.
"Oh, you're awake..." Taehyung approached the bed, taking notice of the dried tears on the cheeks, the blank eyes staring into nothing.
He cautiously sat next to him and caressed his cheek very gently, as though he was touching grass withers.
"What's wrong? Are you not feeling alright?" questioned he in a serene tone, trying not to trigger anything.
The stillness in the atmosphere followed after his question scared the older. It was the first time in decades that he was feeling some fright in a corner of his heart.
"You don't feel like talking?" asked the older male. His impulsive thoughts made him want to do so many things but he put a leash on his emotions and focused on the younger.
".....I don't" came the empty reply, Jungkook's tone was so dull, vacant of any type of emotions.
"I see.....I will let you have your peace" stood up the older and left the room, glancing back at the younger worriedly.
He did not what he was facing right now. He knew that he couldn't push Jungkook, he knows nothing about how to handle or behave in this type of situation. It was Taehyung's first time dealing with someone with mental health problems....
Or dealing with someone at all. He did not know how to approach Jungkook and it was making him anxious, an emotion he was very unfamiliar with, till now.
He fished out his phone and dialled someone's number.
"Mr Kim...." spoke the person on the other end.
"Min Yoongi, have you been doing your job correctly lately?" hissed Taehyung in anger.
According to him Yoongi should have done his job correctly, so that Jungkook wouldn't be in the situation that he was in right now.
"Well....I'd say yes" deadpanned Yoongi.
"Well I think not, Jungkook is in bed, it seemed as though he cried a lot. He has dark circles under his eyes which means he didn't sleep at all last night, his face and his eyes are emotionless......
His body language is so......motionless, am not sure if there is even a body language to interpret here, he seems to be very unguarded, like you could do something terrible to him physically but he still wouldn't react...
It's very clear to me that you are not doing your job well as a therapist!! It was your job to make him feel better!!!" the anger in Taehyung's voice made the other person almost curse Taehyung but he bit his tongue.
"Mr.Kim, unfortunately this is how humans with mental illnesses are you can not predict when they'll have one of their episodes and I as a therapist, can only work when they try to open up and I am trying my best to reach Mr.Jeon's heart. It takes time...By all means I am no magician" spoke Yoongi.
"Well, I do not care. I need you here in the next 10 minutes maximum" Taehyung hung up without listening to another word.
Taehyung felt very uncomfortable under his own skin, why was this happening now? His anxious gaze fell on the closed door.
Jeon Jungkook definitely brought a lot of emotions out of him.
...........
"I am here with 2 minutes to spare" stated Yoongi blankly staring at the gun held between Taehyung slender fingers.
"If it weren't for Jungkook, you would have been long dead" muttered Taehyung, storming upstairs.
Yoongi followed after him.
..........
"Jungkook? How are you feeling?" asked Yoongi gently, sitting on the single couch situated in front of the bed.
The younger just kept quiet. He wanted to scream at the male to get out and leave him alone but he felt like he did not have enough strength.
Taehyung glared at the therapist, standing by the door with his arms folded. The older refused to go to office and leave Jungkook in this type of situation.
Yoongi tried twice before getting up and making his way outside. He led Taehyung further away from Jungkook's room.
"Look, the situation is very sensible. He doesn't want me there, I am pretty sure he was yelling in his mind to make me go away or was too lost in his thoughts" explained Yoongi.
"The Fuck Do you mean?! If you are not going to help him, who will then?!" Taehyung was losing his patience and Yoongi could see that coming.
"Mr.Kim, I can do nothing doesn't mean you can't. You seem to be closer to him than I am, why don't you try to help him out?" asked Yoongi.
"You have two options here when you speak with him; either try to give him solutions when he opens up or just show affection and be there with him" continued Yoongi, trying to explain Taehyung.
"You skipped a step. How to make him open up??!"
"Just go inside, hug him and the rest will work on its own" Yoongi advised.
"You are not to leave till I come back!" ordered Taehyung, going inside Jungkook's room again.
...........
Taehyung took a deep breath before sitting next to Jungkook and started stroking his hair very gently.
"Jungkookie...would you like to talk about it?" asked he in a dulcet voice.
Jungkook finally moved his eyes towards the older and stared right into his eyes. Taehyung of course noticed the difference, normally Jungkook would always look away after 3 to 4 seconds but the younger held the eye contact longer this time.
His empty eyes were desperately searching for something in Taehyung's and Taehyung wished he'd find what he was looking for. The younger shook his head, his pursed lips slightly twitching downwards.
"Then is it okay if I stay here?" asked the older and the younger nodded.
"Would it be okay if we hugged? I could really use a hug, I had a very bad day today" explained Taehyung, he would have laughed at the fact that he was holding his breath waiting for Jungkook's reply but he did not dare.
The younger moved a little bit, he was about to get up but Taehyung held his shoulders..."It's okay, you don't have to get up but am I allowed to lay next you?"
"...okay" it was barely above a whisper but Taehyung was so glad he heard the younger's voice.
Taehyung got in the bed next to the younger and opened his arms, he wanted to give the younger the choice to hug him or not. He wasn't even sure if he was doing the right thing but he hoped he was.
The younger scooted a little bit closer and Taehyung took the cue to pull the other in his arms and engulf the younger in his arms.
Jungkook's face was pressed against the other's chest as he stroked his hair and the other arm was wrapped around his waist.
"You are making me feel so much better, I really need this hug, would it be okay if we could stay like this longer?" Taehyung's deep voice was reaching deep in Jungkook's ears, soothing him and somehow fighting with his inner self unknowingly.
Jungkook shook his head against the other's chest. Taehyung smiled and kissed the crown of his head.
"Thank you, Jungkookie. You are so sweet and kind" complimented Taehyung, his tone dripping with affection.
Jungkook didn't know why but his vision started getting blurry, his eyes were pooling with tears suddenly, surprising his own self.
They started falling as he clutched Taehyung's shirt tightly. Maybe it was due to the older being so close to him or it was because the older was appreciating him for just a hug that he gave.Those words and the physical affection triggered his vulnerability.
He sobbed in the older's chest.
"....I-..I am...sorry" stuttered he through his cried.
"You have nothing to apologise for" whispered Taehyung in his ear while the younger shook his head violently.
"I-...I don't..-didn't wi-sh to.. be here...to.. be bo-rn" cried he and Taehyung stayed quiet, wanting to let the other vent.
"I don't wan-na be ..he-re. I...am..so..sorry....I don't.....it j-ust hurts....so much......I don't want...to b-e a cr-y baby...."
Taehyung tightened his arms around the younger, pressing the other to himself. The younger was so fragile, Taehyung wished he could take all his pain instead, he wished he could fix everything.....The older felt so useless at the moment.
"I don't think you are a cry baby, I think you are strong for battling with yourself each second of the day and I am proud of you for that. I read somewhere that; you cry when your body can't explain the pain its feeling....I am not fully able to understand your pain at the moment but I want to help you and that's why I am here......
The doubts that you have towards yourself are too many, you are very strict to yourself, even though it shouldn't be this way....
It's okay to show weakness, you can lean your head on my shoulder when needed, I won't judge you...I can't even judge you because there's nothing to judge"
Jungkook sobbed hearing the older....and started talking with the older about his evil thoughts. They were very depressing but all Taehyung did was pull him closer and whispered sweet nothings in his ears.
Praising him for being so strong, telling him how happy he was to have met Jungkook. How important Jungkook was to him, despite them knowing each other for only 2 and half months.
...........
"So, how has it been around here?" asked Yoongi, popping a popcorn inside his mouth.
"Master Taehyung has become a lot more.....softer but only towards Master Jungkook or when he is around Master Jungkook" explained Lily.
"Hmm, love is in the mansion" muttered Yoongi but his eyes darted upwards towards the staircase where he saw the couple coming down.
He of course took notice of Jungkook's changed clothes, the younger had freshened up. Everyone nearly gasped seeing the way Taehyung had his arm wrapped around Jungkook's small waist, possessively and protectively.
Yoongi really wanted to know what happened in the past 5 hours as he was waiting downstairs but something told him Taehyung wouldn't tolerate him anymore since Jungkook seemed way better than before.
Taehyung didn't even had to open his mouth and the table was set, they were all Jungkook's favourite dishes. Taehyung served the younger himself.
"Hate to ruin the moment, Mr.Kim" started Yoongi.
"Then shut up, Mr.Min" glared Taehyung at him as soon as he opened his eyes. Yoongi wanted to gasp at the hypocrisy, such loving eyes directed towards Jungkook but towards him? Loathness is what those eyes held, as if he was about to shoot Yoongi, right then and there.
Yoongi bit his tongue, knowing very well the male was capable of that.
Jungkook lightly punched the elder's arm, who immediately turned towards him with a soft smile.
'Two Faced Bitch!!' thought Yoongi but was scared to say out loud.
"Don't be rude, Yoongi hyung is my therapist" spoke the younger, his sweet voice coming out a little hoarse due to all the crying.
"I wasn't rude! Was I?" the older to Yoongi, the dark look on his face told Yoongi very well what he was allowed to say.
"Of course not! I just wanted to ask if I am allowed to take my leave"
............
Also chapter's Name inspired by the song above.
To be honest, today something terrible happened to me and I cried for hours before deciding it was time to get my shit together. I was crying when I wrote this chap, so I am really sorry for any major mistakes.
-small rant-
I hate life so much....but then I feel guilty for feeling this way because there r people out there who have it worst than me...I feel so ungrateful sometimes, I feel like I shouldn't deserve all the good things that I have.
Have a wonderful day or-and night ahead💜
bye.