February 18th, 2012
Y/N POV
I opened my eyes, hearing continuous beeping around me, am I in the fucking hospital? I started looking around and froze when I seen Mani sitting in the chair next to my bed. I'm so fucking confused. What happened?
The room door opened and I seen Dove come in, typing away on his phone. He looked up and we made eye contact. In a second he was over me hugging me tight. My chest was sore though making me groan. He got up off of me saying sorry.
Looking up at him I seen tears in his eyes, this nigga never cries, and even with his glasses on I can tell that he hasn't slept in a while. He wiped his eyes and glared at me playfully.
"My nigga never do that again, I thought you were going to die" I looked at him confused
"Ion even know what I did in the first place to end up here nigga. Last thing I remember is that I couldn't breathe properly and I passed out, did I have a panic attack or something?" I've had lil panic attacks over the years but that felt bigger.
His face changed giving my a half smile. "Nigga you bouta break some bad news or sum?" I chuckled a little bit. But he gave me the same look.
"You went into cardiac arrest " now I was even more confused
"I'm 16 the fuck I look like going into cardiac arrest Dove, am I 50 or something what the hell?"
"No you just got the bum ass heart like you are" he said laughing. I looked at him with a straight face.
"In fairness I thought you were going to die, let me get this laugh out, imma go get the doctor so she can explain to you what happened" I rolled my eyes waving him away, knowing I'd make a joke too if roles were reversed.
He left and I looked over to my side at the sleeping girl. My heart started beating lightly in my chest, the once happy feeling, now accompanied by physical and emotional pain. I was still mad at her, but happy that she was here.
She started to shift around in the chair, waking up. When she seen me she sat up, a small smile making it's way to her face and her arms wrapped around my neck hugging me tight. It was awkward, I just rubbed her back slightly. She pulled back but not too far making me notice the fresh tears in her eyes, I wiped them off of her face and she gave me another small smile.
"I'm sorry Y/N I never should've said the shit I said" she said sniffling
I just looked into her eyes seeing if she actually felt guilty.
She did, but I gave her a simple nod not knowing what to say to her. Out of all the things I forgot I still remembered what she said. She thinks I'm a "freak"
When I go to say something the doctor walks in with Dove, I read her name tag, it saying Dr. Wagner, she gives me a big smile while Mani sits back down in her chair
"I'm glad you're awake now Y/N, I need you to answer some questions for me before I tell you everything" she says
I give her a nod making her continue
"What is your full name?" She asks
She comes to me with her stethoscope listening inside my chest
"Y/N Eleni Y/LN" I answered taking a deep breath
"Where were you born?" She goes to grab my hands
"Dominican Republic August 20th, 1996" I say back, putting my hands in hers
"You're doing great sweetie" I hear Dove say while he laughs a little and I chuckle
"Can you push down on my hands for me please" I push down
"Ok good" she says giving me a smile
She moves to the end of the bed taking the cover off of my feet a little bit and putting her hands on top of them
"Push your toes away from my hands please" I do that , the force making her stumbling a little bit
"Ok damn don't take me down now" she says laughing
I laugh back
"Ok its looking like for the most part your good" she gives me a comforting smile
"And for the other part?" I ask
"Well I'm sure your brother told you that you went into cardiac arrest, which isn't common for a healthy 16 year old but that doesn't mean that it isn't impossible, we found a murmur in your heart, which caused it. But we took you to surgery and did a valve replacement to fix it. You're going to have to take medication to maintain the healing process for about 3 months. Other than that you're good and you can sign the forms and be released. Just call if you have anymore questions" she said giving me a small smile making sure I understood everything that was being said to me
I nodded my head giving her a small tight lipped smile. Still tryna process everything. Trying to process all the times my chest has hurt me, it's been months, what the fuck. But every time it happened was when I was with Mani... was it the fact that I loved her? It can't be that, can it?
"You good sis?" I heard Dove say
"Yea I'm chilling, as long as I can leave and healed" I said
"Yea I'm making sure you taking it slow these next three months" he said putting his hand on my shoulder
"I'm not no fucking grandma" I said
"You are for the next three months, I'm deadass" he said, he looked over at mani, then back at me
"I'm going to get the forms so we can get out of this boring ass hospital" he said walking out
The door closed making awkward silence fill the room with nothing but beeping backing it up
Out the corner of my eye I see Mani move her chair closer to my bed to the side of me.
I turned to her, getting a better look at her. She looks tired and drained, she has bags under her eyes making her look tired as hell. I snap out of my thoughts when I see her give me a small smile. I give her a small smile back. I have no words for her
Silence and beeping, still.
She starts to tear up, making me sit up some more so I can lean over to hold her hand
"I'm sorry, I thought you were going to die and I was gonna lose you, and I'm just sorry, I do love you Y/N. You're perfect, you're not freak, I've loved you since the first time we met. I was scared to accept those feelings just of the thought of you not loving me back. I thought I could get over you by being with Justin but he isn't and has never been you. You've been there for everything with me and you've loved me through all my problems. I freaked out on you and I'm sorry I didn't mean any of those words. It's been you and always will be you. I'm sorry" she said basically pleading
I feel my eyes start to tear up making me look away from her. I rather not seem more vulnerable then I currently am. I look back at her, I want to say something but I have no words for her. Calling me a freak isn't sum shit you say out the blue, that's something you've been thinking for a while.
"That's not some shit you say out the blue Mani, I told you I loved you and you bashed me, you said you used me for Justin, so what happened with that? You feel guilty now cause I almost died? I've loved you since we were 6, through the ups and the bad ass downs I was there for you, not Justin, not any of them other niggas that treated you like shit, and you just took my heart and stomped on that shit. I love you and I always will but anything we had you threw away the second you called me a freak" I said
Tears now streaming all over my face, I couldn't hold these bitches back. Now we were both crying messes, no words just tears
"I'm sorry I can't express to you how sorry I am Y/NN, I never wanted to hurt you, I fell for you the day you gave me half of your sandwich and I never stopped. I never thought you felt the same because you had girlfriends. I wanted to protect myself and I did that by trying to move on but this time I hurt you and I'll always regret that. I lied about the Justin thing, I did that with you because I wanted to, there was feeling behind that and I'll always love you for everything that you've done and been there for, you're not a freak and you've never been one to me, you've always been the love of my life, my sweet sensei" she said tears continuously flowing down her face
I feel my heart beat faster, no pain behind it this time. She said she loves me, I used to pray for times like this when I'd be with my ex's while watching her be with hers, but now that's it's here I can't find it in myself to forgive her. I love her and yet I can't forgive her
"I'm sorry Mani but I can't, I can't forgive you right now, you gotta give me some time, I love you but you gotta figure out what you want, no matter if you meant it or not, you said that shit. You got shit you got to deal with, and I wish I could help you but I can't find it in myself to, you gotta do this on your own" I said removing my hand from hers
The look on her face looks like she's been crushed by a thousand trucks. She nodded her head looking defeated. She got up off the chair, grabbing her belongings, she turned to leave. She was about to walk out the door when she turned back
"No matter how long it takes I'll always love you, no one has my heart like you Y/N" she said then left out the door
That's all it took for me to breakdown fully, there's never been a time where I wasn't without Mani. Now I was going to have to get used to it. I want to forgive her and say fuck it, but I know I'll end up resenting her and thinking that I can't trust her anymore. I rather be without her than that.
As I was sobbing I felt someone hug me. I knew it was Dove cause I could smell his cologne
"It's gonna be ight Y/N, I don't know what happened fully but you gon be alright, just take your time" he said
That shit just made me cry harder, but I got this I just need a few months
Time Skip (6 years later)
Feb 14th, 2018
"Beep bop beep bop" Mac said as I was mastering the beat for him
"Beep bop beep bop" he said again
"Nigga what you saying that for?" I said looking to my right
"Cuz you look like a robot perfecting its craft" he said laughing
"Nigga you annoying I'm almost done and you can record" I said to him laughing a lil bit
I was helping Mac produce his album cuz he quote on quote said "you're the best and nobody is going to get the sound I want, like you" or at least that how I heard it.
After my cardiac arrest I chilled out on all my sports, especially karate after Dove begged me to, cause he was scared what might happen with all that physical contact. I got depressed during those three months of healing, I kept thinking about Normani. Especially when I had to find out that she moved during the summer. I came to the fact that our friendship was done even with the love still being there. I forgave her and never got to tell her. I thought I'd never see her again. Until one day her face was on a billboard and then my TV with 4 other girls with her. We would always tell each other how we'd be like Jay-Z and Beyoncé, cause I was the rapper and she was the singer. It was always her dream to sing on X-Factor and be famous, so I was happy when I seen her on my TV a few months after my CA. I was still trying to forgive her then
After I was done healing I continued with Karate, but it just wasn't the same so I quit and Dove understood. I decided to get a job at the corner store with Henry during my senior year, just so I'd be out the house. It was fun cuz he'd tell me a lot of stories from when he was younger and show me pictures. I remember the time he showed me pictures with Tupac and he told me about how he used to be security for Tupac, like it was just some regular shit, and how after he died he ain't want to be in that dangerous environment anymore because he had a family, so he left that behind. We'd make food and freestyle about random shit with making beats on the grill. Henry told me that I should take the shit seriously, saying that he saw a lot of PAC in me, best compliment ever nfs.
So when Christmas came around, I asked my parents to build a studio in our basement, it was the least they could do since they ain't show up when I damn near died, and they did. I started focusing more on writing music & learning how to produce. I ain't perfect my shit till 2014. I was smoking with Dove and I told him that I was ready to take my producing to the next level and this motherfucker called up J-Cole. He said he wanted to hear my beats to see if I'm really bout the shits like Dove said I was. He came to Houston and we were in the basement just vibing, getting to know each other, and listening to my music. He said he fucked with most of my shit. Then asked if I wanted to help him produce his new album. And fame just went up from 2014 Forrest Hill Drive.
Four years later, I got my own platinum albums and shit, awards, my own money and legacy away from my parents. Ion really talk to them anymore; but it's not like I really did in the first place.
Dove got his own lil family with Giada and their son and daughter. I guess shit happens for a reason, even when you gotta get your heart fucked up in the mix. Sometimes I think about Mani and wonder if she figured herself out. We've been in the same places, like award shows, but never talked or seen each other. I always clapped the loudest when she'd win with her group. I could always feel when she was around, but all I could think about is our hurt feelings towards each other, would it be the same after all these years?
"Why I gotta record it tho, you wrote the song, it's your shit Y/N put it on your album" Mac said
"Cause you gon say it better ion wanna cry and sound weird on this shit" I said admitting to him
"Oh so it's one of those?" I nodded my head at him, he knows about her after one night we got drunk asf and I told him everything from when we were 6 to 16. After 6 years I still feel incomplete no other girl has done it for me like Mani did. No girl has made my heart race and made me feel out of breath the way she did. I still think about what would've happened if I forgave her in the hospital room but fuck it I can't do nothing but write about it now.
"ight I'll do it but you gotta come to Ariana's with me after this" He said making me roll my eyes
"Nigga it's Valentines Day, don't y'all got something planned? I rather not be a third wheel" I said
"Nah she's just throwing a party, we celebrated yesterday" he told me with a smirk wiggling his eyebrows
"Ew nigga ion wanna hear that" I said with disgust all over my face making him weak
"Get in the booth so we can hurry up and finish for today" I told him, while he continued laughing, walking into the room
He put the headphones on and looked at the paper. We already practiced so he knew how to rap it. I started the music making him feel the vibe and he started.
Yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah
Well, okay
I'm always sayin' I won't change but
I ain't the same
Everything is different, I can't complain
Don't know what you missing
Shame on you
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Shame on you
Everything is strange, that's just a game
Everybody tripping, throwing it away
We was getting lifted, now we getting paid
Shame on you
I pay the cost to see apostrophes
That means it's mine, keep to myself, taking my time
Always into some bullshit, and out of line
Driving with my eyes close, missing all the signs
Turn the ignition, I'm driven and sitting pretty
Listening to Whitney and whipping it through the city yeah
Man on a mission, figure it out
Putting way too much on my shoulders, please hold me down
I keep my head above the water (Water)
My eyes is getting bigger, so the world is getting smaller (Smaller)
I've been getting richer but that only made me crazy
Mama told me I was different even when I was a baby
That Mercedes through the PA when I pull up, sounded like a concert
Or a, or a monster truck, I'm tripping but I'm falling up
I always said I want it all, but it's not enough
O-kay
I'm always saying I won't change but
I ain't the same
Everything is different, I can't complain
Don't know what you missing
Shame on you
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Shame on you
Everything is strange, that's just a game
Everybody tripping, throwing it away
We was getting lifted, now we getting paid
Shame on you
We only just begun
No, we don't wanna hurt your feelings
I was only just begun
No, we don't wanna
Hurt (Hurt)
Feelings (Feelings)
Down go the system, long live the king
Turn the power off and get your water from the spring
I'm bringing everyone with me when shit get iffy
I give a hundred and fifty percent
'This, this shit that I'm dealing with, but wish I forget
Used to be feeling depressed,
Now that I'm living and I'm feeling obsessed
Yes, high in Jacuzzi's I been hitting the jets
I'm showing her some love she been giving me sex
Bless bless bless
Respect the outline, don't fuck around and be a victim of your pride
Why you lying? (Why you lying?)
Tell the truth and step aside
I don't got the time to let it slide (Yep)
I'm too grounded, push whips, that move mountains
New crib, blue fountains
These are my surroundings
I've been going through it, you just go around it
But it's really not that different when you think about it
I'm always saying I won't change but
I ain't the same
Everything is different, I can't complain
Don't know what you missing
Shame on you
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Shame on you
Everything is strange, that's just a game
Everybody tripping, throwing it away
We was getting lifted, now we getting paid
Shame on you
Hurt
Feelings
I wiped a tear from under my eye, out of the songs I've wrote about our whole situation this one hits the most, cuz it was the first one I wrote but never got to record it. I gave Mac a thumbs up letting him know that we were good for today. He came out the booth giving me that big smile he usually does
"Nah wipe them tears we are going to get fucked up tonight and you're gonna go home with a bad bitch" he rubbed my shoulders amping me up
I laughed and wiped my face off. He's right going home with a bad bitch and getting wasted is the objective.
Ariana's House [9:00 pm]
Normani's POV
"Come on one more shot Mani pleeeeaasseee" Ariana said begging me
"You know peer pressure is bad right Ariana?" I asked her with a sarcastic tone
"Bitch you're grown ain't nobody peer pressuring you" she said slurring a little bit while rolling her eyes playfully
I laughed at her semi drunken state taking the shot, then chasing it with juice. Ariana decided to throw a Valentines Day party because she loves throwing parties for anything and to also get me out of the house so I can "find someone to hump" her words, definitely not mine.
I was fine with not dating anyone, I've been fine with that for years. My mind always stayed on Y/N. After I left her in the hospital that day, I couldn't stop thinking about her and waiting for her to forgive me. I waited weeks for her to call and text me or show up at my house, but nothing. I even went to her house but Dove said she was at physical therapy. Then when weeks turned into months I started hating her. I know it should've been the other way around but it hurt knowing that she never reached out again. I lost my best friend/love of my life without a word spoken or closure. So in the summer I decided to go on X-Factor, to get my mind off of her, and my parents moved us to Miami. Best thing for me you could say
I would wish I could go back to that night and just admit to her that I did love her instead of lying about Justin and calling her a freak. When Dove called me saying she was in the hospital i broke down. I knew from the first day we met I'd fall hard for her but I never admitted it, I was scared of the truth, scared of the thought of her not loving me back. So when she admitted that she loved me it felt all too real and fake at the same time that I freaked out in the worst way possible
I still miss her, not a day goes by that I don't think about her. It's kinda hard when her face is everywhere and at every award show, I've clapped for her every time she got a new award, especially her three Grammy's; listened to every album and song she made or was featured on. I'm still her biggest fan till this day, I was proud of her. We both got to live our Beyoncé and Jay-Z fantasy out but without each other.
"Oh hell no bitch don't start tearing up" I hear Ariana say pulling me out my thoughts as I feel her finger under my eye. When did I even start crying?
"You thinking about Y/N again?" She asked sobering up a little
I nodded my head making her continue talk. She knows everything
"Why don't you just talk to her Mani it's been years, I barely know her, but from what I do know about her and what you've told me, she would have forgiven you by now. You guys have both grown up and become better versions of yourselves, especially you. Stop beating yourself up over fucked up things you said 6 years ago. You have to heal from that babes. I want the best for you. And the best thing is to talk to her" Ariana said surprisingly clear wiping the other tears off of my face
She's right I've had multiple opportunities to talk to her, but I was scared. What if she's moved on from me completely and doesn't love me anymore. The same fear that I had 6 years ago has been in my head for years.
"You can make your decision tomorrow, right now it's time to get drunk my love" she said handing me two shots and then downing her like it was water. For a short person she knows how to hold her shit
I took the two shots and poured myself two more downing those too. Ariana is right have fun now deal with Y/N later.
I was pouring 4 more shots for me and Ariana and I heard her scream excitedly. Turning around I seen her run to Mac. Looking next to him made my eyes bulge out of my head. After all these years, Y/N was there, right next to him, right in front of me looking at me with the same expression
HOLY SHIT
///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
See I ain't wanna make a Pt. 3 but I also wanted to leave y'all on a mild cliffhanger cuz it's more dramatic
I'm realizing my ass don't know how to make one part imagines but I feel like y'all enjoy it so fuck the short shit
Anyways see y'all in pt.3 🫡