I've literally been shitting my pants every morning with the urge to start typing away. I found a new song that's going to be for the next Drarry I write, and it literally gives me tingles listening to it. Also, I'm bad at smut don't judge me.
Harry's P.O.V
Hermione was hunched over an essay in the common room.
Luckily no one else was in there and I could only assume that everyone else had turned in for the night. When the portrait hole slammed shut Hermione glanced up at me.
"Hello Harry," She said distractedly.
I nodded at her, but she was already back to scribbling on her parchment.
"Sorry to interrupt your work 'Mione but I just thought you should know that Draco is in the Room of Requirement."
She drops her quill and ink splatters against the page. Her posture goes rigid, and she looks at me with her full attention. I can tell she's questioning something and choosing her words carefully.
"Oh . . . so, why aren't you with him?" She questions me.
I furrow my eyebrows in confusion. "Should I . . . be with him?"
She simply 'hm's' at me and tilts her head to the side. "Well . . . I suppose not. I just thought you would've done it this time around."
I force out a laugh awkwardly. I haven't the slightest idea what she was talking about, but something told me that 'done it' was not said in an innocent manner. "I'm sorry?"
Hermione blushes and lets out an exhausted sigh as she stands up. "Never mind, Harry. You were right to tell me though. I have the perfect thing to help him." She pulls out a potion from her robe pocket and I wonder how long she's been holding that in there. She must have been waiting for today.
She examines the silvery liquid and if it wasn't for the peachy hue it had I would've assumed it was a memory.
"Tell me Harry," she begins quietly as the liquid swirls around. "Have you and Draco . . . done anything."
She's trying to feign interest in the potion but she's flushing a scarlet red.
"'Anything?'" I say with a nervous chuckle. I'd like to pretend to be oblivious, but I know exactly what she's asking me. After all, it's been on my mind for months now.
She looks back at me pointedly and says, "Oh stop being so coy, Harry. Have you or have you not?"
I seem to choke on nothing as a coughing fit wreaks havoc on me. Hermione waits patiently with her arms folded and an annoyed expression on her face. I can't fathom why Hermione needs to know such things, but I suppose friends talk about their sex lives, right?
"So, you haven't? Why not? I mean, what's stopping you? Surely you feel some sort of . . . sexual attraction for him, don't you?"
As I catch my breathe I say, "Geez, 'Mione. I feel like I'm having to tell Draco's mother that whole spiel about how I won't hurt him, and I promise to take care of her son."
She rolls her eyes and it's safe to assume that my attempt at changing the subject has been denied.
"Come off of it, Harry. You must have done something with him by now." She says exasperatedly.
I scratch the back of my neck in apprehension before taking a seat on the couch defeatedly. I place my pounding head into the palm of my hands and groan frustratedly.
"Well to tell the truth, we haven't." I expect Hermione to ask me why, but she just looks down at me with an unsatisfied glare. "We haven't had sex yet and it's not because I don't want to. And certainly not because he doesn't want to either." At that I laugh to myself and lift my head up. "Oh, he definitely wants to, that's for sure. Every moment of every day is like his only mission is to seduce me."
I throw my hands out exasperatedly and Hermione has a comforting yet mischievous smile on her lips. "I wonder why," she says with a 'I know what you don't' twang to her words. But I know more than she thinks I do. "So, nothing, then? No intense passionate make-out sessions? No extra close cuddling, or anything?"
At that I stiffen, and I pray Hermione doesn't notice but she does. She smirks at me, and I can see victory written all over her face.
"Well . . . there was this one time." I mentally curse myself for bringing it up as I can already feel my body light on fire in embarrassment. "Dennis played a prank on me which resulted in me chasing Draco. I don't know what it was but when I was chasing him like that, all that was going through my mind was catching him and indulging in my prize."
I hope that's enough for Hermione to go off of, but she waits patiently for details. I sigh and rub my face, hoping to buy myself a little more time. "We shared . . . a moment in an empty classroom. And I . . . sucked him off."
The last part is more of a mumble, but Hermione catches it nonetheless and claps excitedly. But then she seems to catch herself as she coughs into her hand awkwardly. All I can do is watch her as shame digs a hole in my stomach.
"Well, that's great Harry!" And then she falls into her usual mood of talking endlessly about facts and things. "I've actually read about this scenario before. It's called 'The chase.' Basically, when one's mate-" for some reason the word makes my heart stutter, "initiates 'The Chase,' it invokes an urge in the more dominant party. The dominant acts as a predator whereas their mate is the prey. During the run, the dominant will receive urges to prove to the submissive party that they are worthy of taking their mate. And if they succeed in catching their mate then that essentially means that they've proved their dominance over their submissive which, in return, invokes a sense of extreme desire on both ends. It's almost guaranteed that the result will be intimacy."
Hermione states matter-of-factly but then she must realize she's said too much, and she appears to draw into herself.
"That's great, 'Mione. But what's that got to do with, Draco?"
She clears her throat and stands up quickly. She brushes off her skirt- as if merely sitting tarnished the fabric- and heads for the portrait hole.
"Sorry, Harry but I'm sure Draco is waiting on me. Talk to you later, all right?" She slips through the portrait, and I slump in my seat as I ponder over my unanswered questions.
~~~~~
Draco's P.O.V
A pang of immense pain rocks through my body and I wake up with a disgruntled groan. Harry's not here anymore and I silently thank Salazar that he's not.
I release myself to my true form and I sigh as the aching in my tail goes away. It's extremely difficult to keep my human form during heats. Not only that, but I'm not sure I would've been able to suppress my siren side from taking over and practically begging Harry to fuck me again.
I cover my warm face in my hands as I remember how embarrassing that was.
How Harry knew that I wasn't ready for that yet, was beyond me. But I'm thankful that he did.
Then I'm sliding around in the pond as I attempt to hide myself as the doors open. Just as a figure comes into view, I let out a vicious hiss at my safe space being soiled by another occupant.
But then I'm apologizing as a flustered Hermione comes into view.
"Oh hush, dear Dray." She says as she makes her way to the lip of the pond. Then she holds up a misty grey and orange potion and my eyes widen in excitement and relief.
"Hermione . . . you didn't." I say as I eagerly take the potion from her waiting hands and chug its contents. Almost immediately a wave of pure relief kisses my skin and I want to pull Hermione into my arms and thank her for practically saving my life.
"I did." She says with a happy smile.
"I thought we were going to add in the testosterone blockers together." I say as I lick my lips.
"Yes well, I figured you might want it now." She smiles at me, and I can tell she's just as excited as I am that the Heat potion is finally finished.
"Merlin, you were right." I say as I pull her head down and plop a thankful kiss onto her forehead. But the feeling of her skin on me feels like a nasty burn and the idea of being touched by anyone- other than Harry- is absolutely revolting.
Hermione easily senses my discomfort and pulls back, "Of course, you still will want your mate but now you'll be able to control yourself."
I nod at her, and we continue talking about the potion. This is our first test run with this potion so we discuss any symptoms or things that could be improved. Eventually, Hermione claps her hands excitedly as we both decide that the potion is ready for mass distribution- once we get the go ahead, of course.
"So," Hermione says with a mischievous grin. "I talked to Harry before I came over."
I already know what she's wanting to talk about next and I sink under the warm waters with a groan. Thanks to the potion, I feel lighter than ever.
"What?" she asks incredulously. "I told you that you needed to consummate the bond. I was just making sure you were actually trying."
I settle on drifting through the pond on my back as I respond to Hermione, "Of course, I'm trying. It's not like Harry could die from lack of contact with his mate or anything. It's just . . ."
"It's just what?" Hermione says with a roll of her eyes, and I think I might be rubbing off on her. "You were totally capable of doing it tonight, so why didn't you?"
I know Hermione must seem rude for pestering me about such personal things but it's endearing to me. If there's anyone that I'm glad knows about me, then it's her. She's been immensely helpful and I'm grateful to have someone to talk to about everything so openly.
"I . . . I'm not ready, Hermione." I say with a sigh as I side eye her. She doesn't look upset or irritated with me and instead she looks at me with a pitying look in her eyes. I can practically already hear the, "Oh, Draco . . ." already.
I flip around so that I'm facing Hermione with a blush on my cheeks.
"I'm not strong enough yet. Earlier today . . . he was so close to-" But then I stop as my dignity won't let me say any more. "But I couldn't even control myself, Hermione. I almost shifted in front of him. And as fun as bestiality and fish sex sounds, I cannot consummate the bond in that form."
She sighs with a tilt of her head in annoyance.
"I used my charm on him, 'Mione. That's like rape, isn't it?" I say with a disgusted sneer. Disgusted at myself, of course.
"No!" Hermione says as if she's spent hours explaining the same thing to a slow toddler. "It's not rape Draco. The whole reason you have that is for the pleasure of your mate. It's like the lube for his sexual desire, Draco."
I shrug at her as I avert my eyes. "Either way, Hermione, I'm still not ready. I think . . . I think I need more time practicing-"
Hermione gasps before saying, "Don't tell me that!"
I roll my eyes at her with a laugh, "Not practicing that, 'Mione. I meant practicing getting my Siren side under control."
Not only that, but part of me still felt as if Harry should know the full extent of what would be happening if we were to have sex. He might be even angrier if he only found out afterwards.
"'Mione do you think . . .-" I let out a breath of air, "Do you think I'm . . . scary looking."
Suddenly I'm very interested in feeling the bumps on the stone of the pond.
"I wouldn't say scary looking. Off putting more like?" But then Hermione retraces and says, "Not in a bad way, Draco. It's just . . . different."
I prop my head up onto my hand and give Hermione an 'are you serious?' look.
"I'm not dumb, Hermione. I bet I'm the thing you see in your nightmares, aren't I? I'm horrendous looking. Admit it Hermione."
Hermione releases a huff before she says, "Don't be so self-deprecating, Draco. Of course, I find you a little off-putting. It's not every day you see a human with scales and a six foot long tail. I'm not your mate, Draco. Your whole appearance is supposed to be a threat to me. Everything about you is meant to ward away any regular being."
And then I'm rolling my eyes as Hermione goes on a spiel about how my 'Charm' is necessary for more than just turning my mate on. It's meant as a way for Sirens to protect themselves. It temporarily shocks its victim into compliance and that's where the siren song comes in. The song invokes a feeling of deep lust within its victim, thus creating an opening for the Siren to lull them into a trap and kill them.
"I know that, Hermione. If any human sees a Siren, their appearance alone is supposed to make them shite themselves. It's why you're not supposed to let anyone other than your mate see your Siren side."
Hermione than takes a moment to thank me for allowing her to be in my space and see a part of me that's so intimate to my kind. But, honestly Hermione doesn't bother me. She's the only person I'd ever allow to be in the room with me when I'm in this state and I don't know why. Not even Dennis gets to see me like this.
Soon Hermione leaves me be and I spend the rest of my night pining over Harry and stressing about how I'm going to tell him.
~~~~~
Harry's eyes are endless pools of amazement and complete adoration as we stare into each other's eyes.
It's been nearly a week since the test run with the first potion. Harry and I were in the Prefects bathroom. Him on the outside, of course, as he rests his head on his arms. Me with my head propped up and staring into his eyes just as longingly.
An unspoken conversation was happening between us.
Eye-fucking was certainly not on my to-do list today, yet here we are.
All too soon, though, the door to the bathroom swings open and Finnigan walks in.
When he catches sight of us, he stumbles back with a hand over his eyes, "Ah come on, guys. What's a bloke gotta do to take a piss in peace?"
Harry laughs at him lightheartedly but I don't miss the way he scoots in front of me so Seamus can't see my naked body. "Sorry, Seamus. I'm surprised you're already awake. Didn't go on another drinking bender last night?"
Seamus makes his way to the toilets and snickers to himself, "Is that what you expect of me, Harry?" He says with a delicate hand over his chest, feigning hurt.
But then the bell rings and he's off to his next class. I sigh as I stand up out of the warm waters. Like always, Harry turns a nice shade of crimson red at the sight of my bare body in front of his hungry watchful gaze. I smirk to myself. There's nothing like the ego boost I get when he looks at me like that.
I grab onto Harry's hands, and he guides me out of the tub.
He tries his hardest to not let his hands or eyes linger too long but his scent gives him away.
Once I'm dry, I spell my clothes back on and Harry escorts me to my next class. Just like he always does.
Harry and I have fallen into quite the boring schedule. The thought makes me smile. I never thought I'd ever be doing anything with the bloody 'Chosen One' yet here we are, together. Living out our boring simple lives.
It's almost too much to process and it makes me unbelievably happy.
~~~~~
"Not even. If it was a competition,0 I'd be able to beat you easily," I say with a smirk as I feel myself lean in even closer to Harry.
He can't hide the blossoming smile on his face as he says, "Odd, then? Cause I know for a fact I'd beat you."
He places his hand on my thigh and just like that I'm pulling back with a pout. "You cheat."
"It's not cheating. You're the one who'd cheat if our Seekers match was anything to go off of." I point my fork at him stubbornly at that.
"Hey, that's hardly fair. You cheated just the same as I did just not intentionally." I say matter-of-factly.
Harry laughs and the sound only pulls me in closer.
"How so?" He says with a smirk.
I'd say exactly what I was thinking. How he distracted me with his smooth words and his impeccable movements or maybe even his chiseled seekers physique. But that wouldn't get the point across as much as a kiss, would it?
So, for a moment I contemplate pulling him in for a kiss. It'd be easy with how bloody close he is. Not only that but he's facing me at the perfect angle for it. Like he wants me to snog his face off.
"Kiss already, dammit. This is lunch. Not the intro to your favorite 'home movies'." Seamus shouts at us from a few seats down.
Just like that, Harry and I separate more than enough as we both pay close attention to the food on the table.
Well, I can't kiss him now, can I?
"Finnigan always has to be at the wrong place at the right time doesn't he." I say as I drop a particularly soggy wedge back onto my plate.
Harry looks at me like he's analyzing me and my face heats at his intense gaze.
"Does he make you uncomfortable?" Harry asked as if he couldn't process the thought that one of his friends could make me uncomfortable with their meaningless words.
I shrug as I push around the food on my plate. "No. Not uncomfortable. More like . . . worried."
Harry's P.O.V
Worried?
Draco's eyes give away no emotion but the way he's staring intently at his plate tells me that something has been bothering him. And Seamus is the reason.
If I've learned anything from Draco the last few months, then it's that if he's not ready to tell me then I'm not going to get an answer if I ask.
~~~~~
Draco's P.O.V
The warm water pouring out of the faucet runs over my palms like a soothing blanket. A smile of contentment makes its home on my face.
The past month has been like nothing I've ever thought I deserved. I don't think I can even remember a time I felt as fulfilled as I've felt lately.
This time last year, I never would've imagined I'd feel this way again. And it's refreshing.
Every day is peaceful and boring. Not a single thing to worry about. No Deatheaters. No Voldemort. No crazed blood purity fanatics. No impossibly high standards I could never live up to.
And it's all because of Harry.
I'm glad no one else is in the bathroom because I'm positive I look like a lovesick dunce. Nevertheless, I'm still effortlessly excited to meet Harry at the astronomy tower tonight. Just the thought releases raging butterflies inside my stomach.
Tomorrow is the day we leave for Christmas break which means my secret is all that much closer to coming out. And I'm bloody excited.
I sigh to myself, satisfied with the cleanliness of my hands. I go to dry them off but just as I reach for the paper towels, the door opens.
It's Seamus Finnigan and I feel myself still in shock. And because what do I do now? For a moment he doesn't notice me because he's busy shakily unscrewing the cap to his flask.
Finnigan looks at me and then pauses too before quickly scanning the bathroom for other occupants. The moment he realizes we're alone, a look of pure horror etches its way onto his face.
He pales slightly and for a moment I think he stops breathing.
He's looking at me like I'm Voldemort himself.
But then just as quickly as it was there, it was gone. Replaced by an awkward laugh and a forced grin.
"Sorry, Malfoy, I'll use the other bathroom."
The door slams shut, and I'm left in the bathroom alone with several empty stalls.
A sick gnawing pit of guilt burrows into my chest.
I try to shove it down and for now it's gone as the excitement builds. Time to see Harry.
He's always late so I don't rush as I make my way to the Astronomy Tower.
As I open the door, I'm shocked to hear the most heart-wrenching sobs reverberating from none other than Dennis Creevey. When the door shuts behind me, he turns around to look at me.
"Draco." He cries. He's still sobbing hard and the fact that he feels comfortable enough around me to let go like that is astonishing to me.
It spurs me on to stride forward and pull Dennis' trembling body into my arms.
He cries for a moment longer before he eventually catches a breath and calms down.
His voice sound pitifully defeated as he sobs out, "What's it like to have a soulmate, Draco? Someone that will love you no matter what and never leave?"
I hush his sobs for a few seconds longer, in thought.
But then the door to the Astronomy Tower opens once more and a carefree Harry comes into view. He pauses as my glare meets his confused gaze.
"Go away, Harry. It's brotherly bonding time now." I quickly say and Dennis lets out another quiet sob.
Harry nods at me determinedly and says, "Yes, Sir." Then he vanishes out the door with an amused smirk on his handsome face.
"Well," I start with an exhale, "to be honest, I hated the idea of it, at first."
Dennis sniffles quietly and pays rapt attention to what I say next.
"I thought I'd be just a little sex doll for The Saviour, not going to lie," I say with an honest laugh. "Sirens are a very submissive species when it comes to their mates. Which meant- or at least I thought it meant that I'd unknowingly signed up for a life of being bossed around by my worst enemy.
"I think- . . . I think I knew that if I just let it happen then I'd fall for him for sure. So, obviously," I sigh and laugh to myself. "It sounds so stupid now that I'm saying it out loud, but I avoided him. I told myself that if I did fall in love with him then no matter what he did to me, it wouldn't matter. Because I would still love him anyways.
"I never considered he'd love me back. I assumed that all I'd ever be in his eyes was his enemy, even if I felt differently. And wouldn't the Chosen One just love to use my love for him to get under my skin, right?
"But Harry isn't like that. He's . . . good. He's so- effortlessly- good. He's nothing like the person I thought he was."
I pause for a moment and try to build up my courage. "The world is different when I'm with him. It's like he's changed me. As if I'm getting a glimpse of how Harry sees things. And I'm a better person because of it. For the first time in my life, I think I'm finally happy."
"I thought loving Harry meant eternal torment. But It's more like- like he . . . worships me. And in return I'll always be eternally devoted to him."
As I take in an inhale of the frosty nighttime air, I try to suppress the pure adoration I feel for Harry as I say. "I'm so fucking in love with the git that it makes me sick, Dennis. And I love it. Having Harry as my mate is absolutely amazing."
I say the last word with as much amazement- and love, and just pure joy that even I'm stunned. Even though it was just barely a whisper.
I look down at Dennis to find that he's looking at me with amazement and I swear there's stars in his innocent eyes.
He quickly jumps up with a determined look on his face and shouts, "I'm going to find my soulmate, one day, Draco. And I'm going to be just as happy as you are. I'm going to keep living and fighting until that happens."
Then he's quickly turning around and stomping his way out the door.
A laugh bubbles out of me and I'm so relieved that Dennis is going to be ok.
Dennis' P.O.V
I promise I'll find someone to love.
Even if it can't be him.
~~~~~
Harry's P.O.V
"I bet you miss me already, don't you, Scarhead?" Draco says tauntingly as he sends a flick to my scar.
His arms wrap around my neck, and he leans in for a kiss.
The warmth radiating off of him keeps me warm inside Grawp's cold cave.
"I've missed you since the moment I last kissed you, Ferret," I reply before pulling him in for another snog.
"What are you doing out here, anyways, love? The train leaves in twenty minutes," I tell him.
He shrugs with an embarrassed smile on his face and says, "I wanted to tell Grawp goodbye one last time before I left. This is going to be the longest I've ever been away from him since I met him. But he's not here. He must be out hunting."
"Well, while we wait, I have something I forgot to tell you about," I say.
I pull out an old picture I ripped out of a newspaper article, and I can't help the feeling of comfort I get at the sight of it. It's the one of Draco and I that night in Hogsmeade. I'd completely forgotten to tell Draco about it but we're practically public, so I don't think he'll be too upset.
I hold it up for him to see and he grabs it with a look of interest.
"It happened a few months ago but I just forgot to tell you. It was in an article Skeeter wrote about us."
He analyzes the page for a few moments expressionlessly before his eyes widen in shock and he gasps.
"Harry," he says with a whisper. "What if this is why my mother hasn't owled me?"
And then he's a nervous wreck and his voice is weak with anxiety.
"What if she's not ok with us, Harry? She might find us disgusting and be absolutely furious at me when I go home. Or worse, she's mad at me for destroying the family name. Again."
He's pacing with his hands worriedly running through his hair. He's paler than usual and it's obvious he's panicking. I quickly grab onto him and hold him in my arms, and he stops rambling.
"Everything is ok, Draco." He takes a deep breath and wraps his arms around me too. "If things don't go well with your mother, then you're always welcome at the burrow. Besides, who's to say she's not just upset she didn't find out in person?"
I realize that might be the wrong thing to say when his eyes widen in horror once again.
"I mean, don't wizards not really care about sexuality, anyways? Are Purebloods any different?"
Draco ponders for a moment before saying, "Not really but what if she's different? I don't really know where she stands with same sex couples, I've never bothered to ask. Purebloods usually only care when it interferes with an important arranged marriage. But mother never really cared for the Greengrass' anyway."
"I don't think she'll be upset Draco." I peck him on the forehead in reassurance and he smiles gratefully at me. "But we won't find out if we don't leave now."
Draco takes a deep breath and nods at me. "Ok. Everything is fine. I guess I'll just write Hagrid a letter and have him read it to Grawp."
At that, he grabs my hands in his and we set off for the train.
~~~~~
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